Being the Chick on the Side

[leona2025]

I've always wondered about this. Do some women go into the relationship knowing they are the chick on the side and if so don't you feel guilty for messing with someone already in a relationship? How many people have had relationships with married men? How do ya'll handle that emotionally? I know my friend is of the mind that if he don't care if his wife/girlfriend gets hurt why should, but I seen that same girl broken when it happened to her.

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

Hummm.... "Chick on da side"...reminds me of dat song by Koffee Brown. Lemme light a newport one hunnert, n get back witcha on dis one....I gotta marinate on it .... Chick on da side... OK - BRB

 

[Ramya]

Do some women go into the relationship knowing they are the chick on the side?

Some do and some find out after they've been seeing the man for a long amount of time. The first is easier to manage than the latter.

and if so don't you feel guilty for messing with someone already in a relationship?

Why should she? She has no loyalties to the other woman and it is not her job to keep somebody else's man faithful. She gets the perks of a relationship without the committment and bothers of an actual relationship. If she's not looking for anything serious, why should she even care?

How many people have had relationships with married men?

I have been with engaged and/or involved men... I have a thing about not ruining marriages.

How do ya'll handle that emotionally?

It's not really a struggle if you're under the mindset that he's not your man for real. Once you start getting territorial and catching feelings then you have a problem. God forbid the man starts getting "confused" and wanting to talk about it to you and his gf/wife. The rules should be similar to the FB rules (BUDDY). Keep it simple


The bigger issue is why he's seeking out another woman in the first place not necessarily the other woman herself. There had to be a reason other than the other chick is sooo fine or sooo freaky. Chances are he has no intentions of leaving his gf/wife and just wants a temporary fix...

 

[bermudabeauty]

Amerikan I feel you on everything you said boo. Thats real talk!

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

Ok..back. Couldn't marinate like I wanted too, because someone on da train decided to talk a new hole in my weave.....anywho....erplexed

I think at one point or another, we have all been that "chick on the side," bust it baby, jump off, or however you want to term it, whether it was known to us, or not known to us. On that note, if a woman knows she is that chick on the side, it can get ugly and complicated (watch a few episodes of Judge Joe Brown, People's Court, etc.). Ugly & complicated in a sense where a woman can become competitive (i.e., my puddi is better, or I look better, or whatever the case). Next, the phone calls from the other woman, both women on the phone comparing notes, time schedules, and the like. Meanwhile back at the ranch, while you ladies are discussing him, he's off with someone else, not thinking about either of you. Sad, but true.

Now, if a woman is not aware she is the chick on the side (this is the majority, married & single - yes, I said married. I know of a few married women whose husbands claim their mistresses as their main squeeze...apartments on the side, having two households, etc.) then shame on her for being up on her game. (think I'm in trouble for this one!) I say that because a lot of times we lose ourselves in these men, and we start to lose focus on ourselves and are sometime oblivious to what's going on around us.

Bottom line, and I didn't mean to bore the reader, being the chick on the side is not a good look. If you feel you are that chick on the side, RUN FOR THE HILLS...it's not worth it in this day and age of AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases.

 

[Ramya]

Now, if a woman is not aware she is the chick on the side (this is the majority, married & single - yes, I said married. I know of a few married women whose husbands claim their mistresses as their main squeeze...apartments on the side, having two households, etc.) then shame on her for being up on her game. (think I'm in trouble for this one!) I say that because a lot of times we lose ourselves in these men, and we start to lose focus on ourselves and are sometime oblivious to what's going on around us.

ITA! I'm at a loss on how MARRIED folks can seriously not know . I mean dudes who are supporting 2 households? Come on now. But a coworker told me that his wife is happy as long as he pays the bills at home. She doesnt know how much he makes or how much he spends on his side piece. And that in itself is a crying shame

 

[LadyCee]

I honestly think if you know that this person is in a relationship and whether it be serious or not and u still choose to be the chick on the side bc its not ur buzness is pretty shady. Now come on there are alot of women who get hurt in the process of all this. and if you dont care itll just probly happen to you.

I say NO being the chick on the side is a bad look i mean come on all the men out there are sticking out for their home dawgs even if they arent that even cool so why we as women wont help a another woman out if she has no clue. Its shady and degrading to yourself. just my hunch on this.

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

You would be surprised. It just doesn't happen on the Lifetime channel. I know of one guy, has a side apartment, the whole nine. His wife has no clue. He's a co worker. You have some married couples who are unhappy because of different situation. For example, you have some, as you mentioned that don't care what their men do, as long as the bills are paid and they have a roof of their heads. Those women married for convenience and are unhappy. Then you have those who just look at their marriage through rose colored glasses (just don't have a clue ). Then you have some who married their wives because she got pregnant and it was "the right thing to do." People in those types of marriages are too unhappy. I guess this will turn into another thread... "Are you happy in your marriage, or why did you REALLY marry."

I have a friend ( a dumb one) who is seeing this married man, have an apartment together somewhere out in Maryland. I was over there to visit her, and a woman walks through the door with a key! I didn't know...but my friend had this stuck on stupid broke down on dumb look on her face. The woman walked straight to the back where the bedrooms were, stayed maybe 5 minutes and told us to have a nice day. She spoke when she came in, was very familiar with the place. Later that day, I find out it was dude's wife. This story gets worse....won't bore with details, but before she left, he walked her to the living room area where we were...she asked him for kiss (das his wife now) and he gave her one...then she told us to have a nice day and walked out.

Yes, it goes on everyday. So I guess there will be another thread titled "Women who settle.".....just food for thought.

 

[leona2025]

I honestly think if you know that this person is in a relationship and whether it be serious or not and u still choose to be the chick on the side bc its not ur buzness is pretty shady. Now come on there are alot of women who get hurt in the process of all this. and if you dont care itll just probly happen to you.

I say NO being the chick on the side is a bad look i mean come on all the men out there are sticking out for their home dawgs even if they arent that even cool so why we as women wont help a another woman out if she has no clue. Its shady and degrading to yourself. just my hunch on this.

ITA. If I did something like this I would feel scared with every relationship I got in afterward that it was gonna come back on me. Ladies who have done this you don't feel afraid that it will happen to you? Also have ya'll been in a relationship and kept a dude on the side? I couldn't do this even if the wife didn't mind. I know a guy and he says all he likes to "date" is involved women. I just don't understand how you actively seek that out.

 

[Ramya]

ITA. If I did something like this I would feel scared with every relationship I got in afterward that it was gonna come back on me. Ladies who have done this you don't feel afraid that it will happen to you? Also have ya'll been in a relationship and kept a dude on the side? I couldn't do this even if the wife didn't mind. I know a guy and he says all he likes to "date" is involved women. I just don't understand how you actively seek that out.

And that's perfectly OK. The women who are the other woman are not all cut from the same mold. There are many different reasons why someone would want to do that. I had mine and I no longer deal with involved men (sexually anyway). Different time in my life...

I am not afraid that it will happen to me. To my knowledge it hasn't happened to me but that's probably b/c I know what signs to look for leading up to the cheating and I really pay attention to what he is saying. See you never do anything without first alluding to it and second speaking it. A good man that has another woman is generally trying to fill some void in his main relationship that his gf/wife has ignored. He doesn't really want to cheat but in the beginning it "fixes" things and sooner or later he gets caught up. The dawgs... well they never really cared in the first place.

I've never kept a dude on the side b/c when I'm in a committed relationship I'd rather work on my relationship than to seek outside fulfillment. If it's not working, I let him go.

 

[ladylibra]

^^^no, those women don't think like that. they think it's okay to *** up other people's relationships, but when they feel like settling down they expect a man to be faithful to them.

and get sh!tty when they become the ones cheated on. go figure

it always boils down to selfishness... the people involved in infidelity are only thinking about themselves and what they want (the man cheating on his woman, the woman helping the man cheat who knows she's the side chick). so of course they justify their own behavior, but don't want to be in the victim's shoes (the woman getting cheated on).

 

[Ramya]

I honestly think if you know that this person is in a relationship and whether it be serious or not and u still choose to be the chick on the side bc its not ur buzness is pretty shady. Now come on there are alot of women who get hurt in the process of all this. and if you dont care itll just probly happen to you.

I say NO being the chick on the side is a bad look i mean come on all the men out there are sticking out for their home dawgs even if they arent that even cool so why we as women wont help a another woman out if she has no clue. Its shady and degrading to yourself. just my hunch on this.

If she's the side chick on purpose it could be out of competition with the main chick or just convenience either way she's not thinking about the well being of the main chick. It's a game, chances are side piece doesn't really care about the dude either. All she cares about is that her needs are being met. Shady? Yes but that's the truth. Degrading? depends on how she feels about it. She might be perfectly content with being a side piece. Should she want more? Yes but it's really not up to other people to make that call for her.

ETA: some do it out of desperation "a piece of a man is better than no man at all" I just don't see being a side piece for an extended amount of time but yeah...


And the point that everybody is missing is that the man has the power to avoid there ever being a side piece. Its not side piece's responsibility IMO. Whether he cheats with potential side piece A or Z, he had the option of being faithful. And he made the CHOICE not to.

 

[Growinpainz]

You would be surprised. It just doesn't happen on the Lifetime channel. I know of one guy, has a side apartment, the whole nine. His wife has no clue. He's a co worker. You have some married couples who are unhappy because of different situation. For example, you have some, as you mentioned that don't care what their men do, as long as the bills are paid and they have a roof of their heads. Those women married for convenience and are unhappy. Then you have those who just look at their marriage through rose colored glasses (just don't have a clue ). Then you have some who married their wives because she got pregnant and it was "the right thing to do." People in those types of marriages are too unhappy. I guess this will turn into another thread... "Are you happy in your marriage, or why did you REALLY marry."

I have a friend ( a dumb one) who is seeing this married man, have an apartment together somewhere out in Maryland. I was over there to visit her, and a woman walks through the door with a key! I didn't know...but my friend had this stuck on stupid broke down on dumb look on her face. The woman walked straight to the back where the bedrooms were, stayed maybe 5 minutes and told us to have a nice day. She spoke when she came in, was very familiar with the place. Later that day, I find out it was dude's wife. This story gets worse....won't bore with details, but before she left, he walked her to the living room area where we were...she asked him for kiss (das his wife now) and he gave her one...then she told us to have a nice day and walked out.

Yes, it goes on everyday. So I guess there will be another thread titled "Women who settle.".....just food for thought.

WTH???

 

[naturalmanenyc]

I've always wondered about this. Do some women go into the relationship knowing they are the chick on the side and if so don't you feel guilty for messing with someone already in a relationship? How many people have had relationships with married men? How do ya'll handle that emotionally? I know my friend is of the mind that if he don't care if his wife/girlfriend gets hurt why should, but I seen that same girl broken when it happened to her.

Yes, some women do not care if the guy is married/involved while others go into it hoping to become the wife. Some women only want to date married men. Not sure why though?

I have a friend who was the side chick and she just married the guy last month. He had a live in GF when they met and then got a second GF after the live-in relationship ended. My friend was the side chick through 2 of his relationships over the course of 8 years.

DH's SIL was also the side chick through 2 marriages. By the time she married BIL, they had 2 teenage sons. Knowing her the way we do, she did NOT care at all that his wife (first wife) knew about his cheating. She once threatened to take their infant son to his wife's job if he did not tell his wife that he had an outside child.

 

[LookingandListening]

I just had this conversation today. I could not knowingly date another's man simply because I do not like feeling like I come second and I don't like sharing. I have had a number of propositions to do so and have always responded like . I had one guy,a co-worker, whom after I rejected 4+ times finally broke down and tried to make an arrangement because he thought I MUST HAVE been seeing someone. He told me about his fiance and asked if I would be cool w/ seeng him o/s. I was like HELL NO!!!. Now I can't even look at him. He married her a few months ago--ring all shining and his face all glum--all the time.

Slightly OT, but what happened to the fellas who didnt have to lie to kick it. The ones who could, and who had enough self esteem to be like, "I don't want to be exclusive and I have X many female friends right now. I have one friend like this and he gets MAD respect from me. He has a GREAT career, is really good looking and has a fun personality--and he dates all he wants without any drama. I be looking at lyin' a$$ fools like, "Damn, you a sucka!!"

 

[TCatt86]

And that's perfectly OK. The women who are the other woman are not all cut from the same mold. There are many different reasons why someone would want to do that. I had mine and I no longer deal with involved men (sexually anyway). Different time in my life...

I am not afraid that it will happen to me. To my knowledge it hasn't happened to me but that's probably b/c I know what signs to look for leading up to the cheating and I really pay attention to what he is saying. See you never do anything without first alluding to it and second speaking it. A good man that has another woman is generally trying to fill some void in his main relationship that his gf/wife has ignored. He doesn't really want to cheat but in the beginning it "fixes" things and sooner or later he gets caught up. The dawgs... well they never really cared in the first place.

I've never kept a dude on the side b/c when I'm in a committed relationship I'd rather work on my relationship than to seek outside fulfillment. If it's not working, I let him go.

So true!!! You are on point with your post.

 

[Country gal]

I think I was the side women when I was dating this one guy. He claims the time he got in a relationship was with two other women where when we were not dealing with each other.

Men can be so shady. If you have a woman and you are miserable than just leave. If I know a man has a wife or is seriously involved than I don't get involved with him. I don't need to be the side chick. I know I was just talking about having a F**k buddy the other day but it is different to me. I am single and he is single, I just don't want to invest in an emotional relationship with him.

 

[syze6]

You would be surprised. It just doesn't happen on the Lifetime channel. I know of one guy, has a side apartment, the whole nine. His wife has no clue. He's a co worker. You have some married couples who are unhappy because of different situation. For example, you have some, as you mentioned that don't care what their men do, as long as the bills are paid and they have a roof of their heads. Those women married for convenience and are unhappy. Then you have those who just look at their marriage through rose colored glasses (just don't have a clue ). Then you have some who married their wives because she got pregnant and it was "the right thing to do." People in those types of marriages are too unhappy. I guess this will turn into another thread... "Are you happy in your marriage, or why did you REALLY marry."

I have a friend ( a dumb one) who is seeing this married man, have an apartment together somewhere out in Maryland. I was over there to visit her, and a woman walks through the door with a key! I didn't know...but my friend had this stuck on stupid broke down on dumb look on her face. The woman walked straight to the back where the bedrooms were, stayed maybe 5 minutes and told us to have a nice day. She spoke when she came in, was very familiar with the place. Later that day, I find out it was dude's wife. This story gets worse....won't bore with details, but before she left, he walked her to the living room area where we were...she asked him for kiss (das his wife now) and he gave her one...then she told us to have a nice day and walked out.

Yes, it goes on everyday. So I guess there will be another thread titled "Women who settle.".....just food for thought.

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[LBoogie]

I have a friend ( a dumb one) who is seeing this married man, have an apartment together somewhere out in Maryland. I was over there to visit her, and a woman walks through the door with a key! I didn't know...but my friend had this stuck on stupid broke down on dumb look on her face. The woman walked straight to the back where the bedrooms were, stayed maybe 5 minutes and told us to have a nice day. She spoke when she came in, was very familiar with the place. Later that day, I find out it was dude's wife. This story gets worse....won't bore with details, but before she left, he walked her to the living room area where we were...she asked him for kiss (das his wife now) and he gave her one...then she told us to have a nice day and walked out.

Yes, it goes on everyday. So I guess there will be another thread titled "Women who settle.".....just food for thought.

I read this THREE times and I'm still dumbfounded.

WTH!!!???

So wait, the friend and the guy live TOGETHER and the wife has a key to the place her husband and his girlfriend reside at?

 

[Honi]

True story....should be on Lifetime TV

I have a male friend that is married with a 3rd child on the way (she is currently 6 months pregnant). A month before fathers day he told me that he had a "chick on the side", that side chick knows about wifey (and is ok with it) and wifey was recently told (by him) about side chick. Wife was upset but continues to stay with him.

Here is the incredible part.......

For weeks he had been telling me how he wanted the side chick and wifey to meet. I thought he had a death wish and told him that it was never going to happen without some serious drama.

Well....for Father's Day wifey asked him what he would like to do. He responded that he wanted them both to meet....and they DID. I’m talking about his whole entire family (wife and kids). I was mad about the kids but anyway he said that his wife barely said anything to her the entire time. I was wondering how come she wasn't swingin' at this ***** :whipped:

Yesterday he told me that the side chick had been feeling like she wasn’t special (the other woman syndrome) and wanted the same type of companionship....even wants to have his child which is ok by him. Wifey wants him to leave side chick alone but he can’t. He says that he loves them both and they love him.

Wifes parents know about it, side chicks parents know about it. WTF

As of yesterday he told me that he was looking to buy a place so that they could all move in. In the end he is hoping that wifey will just let it be and that side chick and wifey will grow to be friends. So in his sick twisted mind it will work out. I was speechless at this point. He's a selfish bastard!

 

[leona2025]

OH MY GOODNESS. Ya'll would be seeing me on Snapped. I would already have given my mom custody of kids and there would arsenic waiting n DH dinner. No seriously. There's no way I would let this happen. What would she be teaching her children. I hope she is able to take care of herself and children. I know some women in situations where they feel like they have to stay because they don't know how they would meet their basic needs of a place to stay and food to eat. That would never have happened at Father's Day. She kinda openned the door all up for side chick.

 

[treybaby2005]

I need to stay out of threads like these.It is giving me a headache.

 

[chichibean]

True story....should be on Lifetime TV

I have a male friend that is married with a 3rd child on the way (she is currently 6 months pregnant). A month before fathers day he told me that he had a "chick on the side", that side chick knows about wifey (and is ok with it) and wifey was recently told (by him) about side chick. Wife was upset but continues to stay with him.

Here is the incredible part.......

For weeks he had been telling me how he wanted the side chick and wifey to meet. I thought he had a death wish and told him that it was never going to happen without some serious drama.

Well....for Father's Day wifey asked him what he would like to do. He responded that he wanted them both to meet....and they DID. I’m talking about his whole entire family (wife and kids). I was mad about the kids but anyway he said that his wife barely said anything to her the entire time. I was wondering how come she wasn't swingin' at this ***** :whipped:

Yesterday he told me that the side chick had been feeling like she wasn’t special (the other woman syndrome) and wanted the same type of companionship....even wants to have his child which is ok by him. Wifey wants him to leave side chick alone but he can’t. He says that he loves them both and they love him.

Wifes parents know about it, side chicks parents know about it. WTF

As of yesterday he told me that he was looking to buy a place so that they could all move in. In the end he is hoping that wifey will just let it be and that side chick and wifey will grow to be friends. So in his sick twisted mind it will work out. I was speechless at this point. He's a selfish bastard!

Huh?

I need to stay out of threads like these.It is giving me a headache.

For real!

 

[TCatt86]

True story....should be on Lifetime TV

I have a male friend that is married with a 3rd child on the way (she is currently 6 months pregnant). A month before fathers day he told me that he had a "chick on the side", that side chick knows about wifey (and is ok with it) and wifey was recently told (by him) about side chick. Wife was upset but continues to stay with him.

Here is the incredible part.......

For weeks he had been telling me how he wanted the side chick and wifey to meet. I thought he had a death wish and told him that it was never going to happen without some serious drama.

Well....for Father's Day wifey asked him what he would like to do. He responded that he wanted them both to meet....and they DID. I’m talking about his whole entire family (wife and kids). I was mad about the kids but anyway he said that his wife barely said anything to her the entire time. I was wondering how come she wasn't swingin' at this ***** :whipped:

Yesterday he told me that the side chick had been feeling like she wasn’t special (the other woman syndrome) and wanted the same type of companionship....even wants to have his child which is ok by him. Wifey wants him to leave side chick alone but he can’t. He says that he loves them both and they love him.
Wifes parents know about it, side chicks parents know about it. WTF

As of yesterday he told me that he was looking to buy a place so that they could all move in. In the end he is hoping that wifey will just let it be and that side chick and wifey will grow to be friends. So in his sick twisted mind it will work out. I was speechless at this point. He's a selfish bastard!

Ok this is crazy!!!! Some stuff I just refuse to believe, I'm not calling you a liar, I know you are telling the truth, but my mind won't let me accept that the wife and the hoe on the side agreed to meet and hang out. These women must have low self esteem, it's one thing to be with a cheater it's another to hang out with him and his other woman. If my man(and this is hypothetical because I'm single) ever asked me to meet his other woman he would get the a** whipping of his life!!!! While these women are stressing trying to make his selfish a** happy, they are lowering their self esteem and self respect and he's just as happy as he wants to be, catching nuts all over the place. I hope this lady doesn't have daughters because that is a horrible example to set for your daughter.

 

[LunadeMiel]

Some of these responses are just so sad and depressing..... God willing I will never be in a situation where I feel like I have to share a man. My life will never be that low and miserable.

 

[aja1121]

True story....should be on Lifetime TV

I have a male friend that is married with a 3rd child on the way (she is currently 6 months pregnant). A month before fathers day he told me that he had a "chick on the side", that side chick knows about wifey (and is ok with it) and wifey was recently told (by him) about side chick. Wife was upset but continues to stay with him.

Here is the incredible part.......

For weeks he had been telling me how he wanted the side chick and wifey to meet. I thought he had a death wish and told him that it was never going to happen without some serious drama.

Well....for Father's Day wifey asked him what he would like to do. He responded that he wanted them both to meet....and they DID. I’m talking about his whole entire family (wife and kids). I was mad about the kids but anyway he said that his wife barely said anything to her the entire time. I was wondering how come she wasn't swingin' at this ***** :whipped:

Yesterday he told me that the side chick had been feeling like she wasn’t special (the other woman syndrome) and wanted the same type of companionship....even wants to have his child which is ok by him. Wifey wants him to leave side chick alone but he can’t. He says that he loves them both and they love him.

Wifes parents know about it, side chicks parents know about it. WTF

As of yesterday he told me that he was looking to buy a place so that they could all move in. In the end he is hoping that wifey will just let it be and that side chick and wifey will grow to be friends. So in his sick twisted mind it will work out. I was speechless at this point. He's a selfish bastard!

That's how it all starts! Next thing you know, he'll be living in a polygamist colony! A lot of the first wives claim that this is how it happened and they were not excepting of it in the beginning.

 

[Covergirl5906]

^^^no, those women don't think like that. they think it's okay to *** up other people's relationships, but when they feel like settling down they expect a man to be faithful to them.

and get sh!tty when they become the ones cheated on. go figure

it always boils down to selfishness... the people involved in infidelity are only thinking about themselves and what they want (the man cheating on his woman, the woman helping the man cheat who knows she's the side chick). so of course they justify their own behavior, but don't want to be in the victim's shoes (the woman getting cheated on).

I totally agree. If a woman becomes involved with a man and TRULY doesn't know that he has a woman, it's not her fault ... though I do believe that some women like to play dumb and pretend that they don't see those big red flags. Now "women" who intentionally go after men they know are in relationships are lowdown and disgusting. They have zero self-worth and must not believe that they can get an unattached man.

 

[Tarae]

True story....should be on Lifetime TV

I have a male friend that is married with a 3rd child on the way (she is currently 6 months pregnant). A month before fathers day he told me that he had a "chick on the side", that side chick knows about wifey (and is ok with it) and wifey was recently told (by him) about side chick. Wife was upset but continues to stay with him.

Here is the incredible part.......

For weeks he had been telling me how he wanted the side chick and wifey to meet. I thought he had a death wish and told him that it was never going to happen without some serious drama.

Well....for Father's Day wifey asked him what he would like to do. He responded that he wanted them both to meet....and they DID. I’m talking about his whole entire family (wife and kids). I was mad about the kids but anyway he said that his wife barely said anything to her the entire time. I was wondering how come she wasn't swingin' at this ***** :whipped:

Yesterday he told me that the side chick had been feeling like she wasn’t special (the other woman syndrome) and wanted the same type of companionship....even wants to have his child which is ok by him. Wifey wants him to leave side chick alone but he can’t. He says that he loves them both and they love him.

Wifes parents know about it, side chicks parents know about it. WTF

As of yesterday he told me that he was looking to buy a place so that they could all move in. In the end he is hoping that wifey will just let it be and that side chick and wifey will grow to be friends. So in his sick twisted mind it will work out. I was speechless at this point. He's a selfish bastard!

You have got to be kidding me. There is no way...NO WAY!

 

[spelmanlocks]

True story....should be on Lifetime TV

I have a male friend that is married with a 3rd child on the way (she is currently 6 months pregnant). A month before fathers day he told me that he had a "chick on the side", that side chick knows about wifey (and is ok with it) and wifey was recently told (by him) about side chick. Wife was upset but continues to stay with him.

Here is the incredible part.......

For weeks he had been telling me how he wanted the side chick and wifey to meet. I thought he had a death wish and told him that it was never going to happen without some serious drama.

Well....for Father's Day wifey asked him what he would like to do. He responded that he wanted them both to meet....and they DID. I’m talking about his whole entire family (wife and kids). I was mad about the kids but anyway he said that his wife barely said anything to her the entire time. I was wondering how come she wasn't swingin' at this ***** :whipped:

Yesterday he told me that the side chick had been feeling like she wasn’t special (the other woman syndrome) and wanted the same type of companionship....even wants to have his child which is ok by him. Wifey wants him to leave side chick alone but he can’t. He says that he loves them both and they love him.

Wifes parents know about it, side chicks parents know about it. WTF

As of yesterday he told me that he was looking to buy a place so that they could all move in. In the end he is hoping that wifey will just let it be and that side chick and wifey will grow to be friends. So in his sick twisted mind it will work out. I was speechless at this point. He's a selfish bastard!

Dang, that is truly awful. I couldn't even be friends with someone this selfish cause I'd want to slap him myself. Still its not surprising, my best guy friend mom has been seeing a married man for over 10 years. My friend hates it, but the dude gives his mom a lot of money and pays all of her bills practically so he pretty much keeps quiet on it. And I know his wife has to know after all these years cause they all live in the same town and we even went to high school with his kids.

 

[MrsQueeny]

Do some women go into the relationship knowing they are the chick on the side and if so don't you feel guilty for messing with someone already in a relationship?
Yes they do. Nope I sure didn't. He was the dude on the side as well. I was young and just having fun.

How many people have had relationships with married men?
I haven't. I drew the line there.

How do ya'll handle that emotionally?
There was no emotion involved. I set the rules, boundaries, and controlled how things went down. We never slept together so that was another reason why I didn't get feelings. It was great because I didn't have to deal with all the drama of having an out in the open relationship. Plus he took good care of me and kept his gf happy as well because I made sure he did. Heck she even got an engagement ring because of me. (long story)

People would love to believe it is about low self esteem and but sometimes it's just about getting what you want for the time being and then moving on. Q