Bad Girls With Good Men...what's Up With That?

[ambergirl]

I guess this could be in the relationship forum but I never go in there.


Here's my beef. I have a "friend" who is older than mud but still wants to play the field, doing the cougar thing with young hot things for the sex, and has no interest in anything other than herself.

So awhile ago she met a really nice, accomplished guy who adores here and has a small child. She's not into "relationships" so she's trying to figure out how she can get the sex and not have to be in relationship. Also she hates children and is trying to figure out ways to avoid being around the kid.

Did I also mention that she's damn near an alcoholic?

So can someone please explain to me why a "good" man would put so much energy in to trying to create a relationship with someone who's clear they're all about hitting it and quitting it????

 

[awhyley]

She probably doesn't act that way around him.

 

[Vanity1]

Not trying to hijack...

I ask myself this same question with good women who put so much time and effort into being with a lousy man. Makes me wonder, especially since I see this more than the other....

Great topic though, can't wait to read the responses.

 

[v2.0]

Why does he want her around his kid?

 

[tiara76]

whats the reason a "good" girl wants to be with a "bad" man.....same difference..whats goin on inside of him and his personal inner self have alot more to do with the situation than what may seem accomplished on the outside to somebody looking at it on surface levels solely

 

[BrickbyBrick]

could be a couple of things really:

1. She's drop dead gorgeous, so he's willing to overlook the personality disorder

2. Some guys like a challenge. He's feeling the strong personality and he may think he can tame her or get her to come around.

3. She's rich as sin.

4. She's awesome in bed.

Just a few things that come to mind.

 

[cmperez]

I've found that these men have the same issues as women who are attracted to the wrong men. For whatever reason they're drawn to dysfunction. Just because they're men doesn't mean they're immune to that.

 

[ambergirl]

Why does he want her around his kid?

no joke! They've been dating for a hot minute and she's already doing sleep overs when the kids there

 

[ambergirl]

could be a couple of things really:

1. She's drop dead gorgeous, so he's willing to overlook the personality disorder

2. Some guys like a challenge. He's feeling the strong personality and he may think he can tame her or get her to come around.

3. She's rich as sin.

4. She's awesome in bed.

Just a few things that come to mind.

1) Okay she looks good for her age but not drop dead gorgeous by any stretch

2) Possible...I mean she basically told him she wanted to get down to business on date 2

3) heck no...she is stone dead broke because she drops most of her money drinking and hanging out at bars

4) possible....but why try to push the relationship. All of her young studs use her for sex and don't try to have a relationship. This guy is in her age group, very, very, well educated and has money, and not bad looking, he could have lots of women so why focus on this one?

I've seen this so many times and it's both maddening and depressing. There are probably 100 smart, sexy, attractive chicks out there he could date (I live in SF after all...the gender ratio here is ridiculous since there are so many gay men)...why hang with the crazy, neurotic, alcoholic???

 

[Carrie A]

Some men want to play savior. They want to swoop down and rescue and fix up the woman.

The pygmalian syndrome.

And other men really get off on the drama.

 

[Keen]

Some men want to play savior. They want to swoop down and rescue and fix up the woman.

The pygmalian syndrome.

And other men really get off on the drama.

Yep. Just like some good girls like bad boys.

 

[Bunny77]

Some men want to play savior. They want to swoop down and rescue and fix up the woman.

The pygmalian syndrome.

And other men really get off on the drama.

Or in more "hood" terms... the Captain Save-A-Garden Tool syndrome!

 

[ambergirl]

Some men want to play savior. They want to swoop down and rescue and fix up the woman.

The pygmalian syndrome.

And other men really get off on the drama.

So true....one guy I know said he liked women who were slightly off because they were unpredictable and the focus was always on the woman and what her issues were and not what ever was going on with him.