GoingNatural
Well-Known Member
I go back and forth. I really just want to be in a committed long-term relationship. Everything else in my life is good and on track so I'm ready for that. I'm 24
Anyone in their early 20's ready to be engaged?
- Thread starter gimbap
- Start date
im almost 21 and i find myself thinking about this alot more lately.
me and my high school sweet heart have known eachother for 6 years and im like.." soo um.. when we gone get hitched
?" lol. we both know we are going to get married its just a matter of time.
so until then we're gunna finish college and have fun
me and my high school sweet heart have known eachother for 6 years and im like.." soo um.. when we gone get hitched
?" lol. we both know we are going to get married its just a matter of time.so until then we're gunna finish college and have fun
secretdiamond
Well-Known Member
No way. 
I need to live my life for me first. I'm already with the man I want to marry, but I do not want to marry him now. I have to get my career in gear first and so does he. And while people can do the career thing while being married, that's all too much to focus at once for me.
When I'm almost done, I'll have spent most of my life & the first half of my 20's in school. Once I'm done, I'm not looking to jump the broom. I'm looking to live the young, sexy, free & "single" fabulous life I've always dreamed. The early marriage thing is def. not for me.
I don't want kids yet, don't want to buy a house yet, don't want to learn to cook yet
, & don't want to live with my SO yet. So there's absolutely no point in marrying.
Now if he proposes, I may (probably will) say yes---partly cuz I'd want to rock the bling.
He's been talking about changing his plans for the future & is thinking of marrying sooner rather than later. I'm like, this is not what we planned.
I need to live my life for me first. I'm already with the man I want to marry, but I do not want to marry him now. I have to get my career in gear first and so does he. And while people can do the career thing while being married, that's all too much to focus at once for me.When I'm almost done, I'll have spent most of my life & the first half of my 20's in school. Once I'm done, I'm not looking to jump the broom. I'm looking to live the young, sexy, free & "single" fabulous life I've always dreamed. The early marriage thing is def. not for me.
I don't want kids yet, don't want to buy a house yet, don't want to learn to cook yet
, & don't want to live with my SO yet. So there's absolutely no point in marrying.Now if he proposes, I may (probably will) say yes---partly cuz I'd want to rock the bling.
He's been talking about changing his plans for the future & is thinking of marrying sooner rather than later. I'm like, this is not what we planned.
Farida
Well-Known Member
im almost 21 and i find myself thinking about this alot more lately.
me and my high school sweet heart have known eachother for 6 years and im like.." soo um.. when we gone get hitched
so until then we're gunna finish college and have fun
OT - I love that sig pic. That is hair commercial gloss!
Innocent_Kiss
Well-Known Member
I'm 21 and me and my SO "plan" to get married. Super long story - I'm not even sure, anymore. Anyway, I'm not into the whole dating around thing. It can be fun, but monogamy is definitely my forte. Although I'm in a relationship of two years, I still have fun. I wish I would sit in the house because I'm in a relationship...psshhh please! I don't know why we equate relationships with being locked down. I have a ball 
Oh yea, what are you alls names on facebook? Add me! -> Ebonie Nicole Flynn
Oh yea, what are you alls names on facebook? Add me! -> Ebonie Nicole Flynn
ElegantExotic
Well-Known Member
I'm nowhere near ready yet.
CarLiTa
Well-Known Member
age 20
nowhere near being ready.
i am hoping to work for 2-3 years after undergrad before heading back to grad school for possibly a double degree (joint program).
by then i'll be 25. when i finish that program, i'll be 28.
i kinda would like to be engaged at 25, i think. i know i DEFINITELY want to live alone for a few years. I have so much to learn.
However, I also want to be married for a few years, before the babies come. I'm thinking at this rate, I might be having kids at age 30
b/c I want to be married for a couple of years before the kids come.
ugh. who knows.
nowhere near being ready.
i am hoping to work for 2-3 years after undergrad before heading back to grad school for possibly a double degree (joint program).
by then i'll be 25. when i finish that program, i'll be 28.
i kinda would like to be engaged at 25, i think. i know i DEFINITELY want to live alone for a few years. I have so much to learn.
However, I also want to be married for a few years, before the babies come. I'm thinking at this rate, I might be having kids at age 30
b/c I want to be married for a couple of years before the kids come. ugh. who knows.
filthyfresh
New Member
I'd like to be engaged. I'm 22.
Just because you're engaged doesn't mean you're getting married the next day.
It just means that you're on the track to getting married.
I wouldn't mind being engaged because Lord knows the dating scene is whack.
At least in Chicago it is, IMO.
Maybe I'm just not going to the right places. [shrugs]
Just because you're engaged doesn't mean you're getting married the next day.
It just means that you're on the track to getting married.
I wouldn't mind being engaged because Lord knows the dating scene is whack.
At least in Chicago it is, IMO.
Maybe I'm just not going to the right places. [shrugs]
Theo
New Member
Noooooo.... say it ain't so!!!!
I'm 20. I have no desire to be engaged, or even in a relationship... at least not for awhile. I have way to much stuff going on in my life right now, and I need my space.
I'm 22 and i got married a yr ago, ladies don't rush it cause you really need to dig deep before you leap cause it is a full time job and some more all by itself. You definatly have your good days and ur share of bad but, if you really love them take a deep breath, grit your teeth and keep it moving.
weaveologist
New Member
Me, me, me, me, me! I am UBER ready! I initially thought that I was so ready because I was forced to mature faster than my friends since I had my son at 14. He's 11 now and I am 26. But it seems as if people are getting married so much faster than they were a few years ago! I feel like I am starting late because I don't even have a boyfriend so engaged will take even longer! The man has to find me first!
blkbeauty
Well-Known Member
i'm not ready. i want to get my master's first. so in two years i think that i will be ready. a lot of my friends are wanting that life-you know husband, wife, and kids. however, i also don't want to be one of those people who look back and wonder where the time went...
Smart girl!
weaveologist
New Member
Girl I am SO with you! The dating seen in Chicago is dead, buried, and needs to be brought back to life. Its so bad that I want to move. I visit other cities and the men are so fresh, so sweet, so charming, so NOT in a gawd d^&m white tee
!
blkbeauty
Well-Known Member
Just a small piece of advice for all the young ladies. Take your time, settling down or the notion of marriage isn't going out of style any time soon. Use this time to enjoy your life, get to know yourself as a woman as you grow from being a teenager. Know your wants, desires, dreams, goals, ambitions in yourself first before you choose your life time counterpart and be confident in pursuing all those things independently before you make the move to walk down the aisle.
secretdiamond
Well-Known Member
Exactly.
I'm not a party girl so my choice has nothing to do with partying and all that other stuff. My SO is not controlling so I'd still have my "freedom." I want time for me to get to know me as the person I've become but have not paid much attention to b/c my head was too busy in the books. My father always told me, "you'll have the chance to be married with responsibilities for the rest of your life. You're gonna spend more time being an "adult" than being a young, single person. So you can take your time to get there. It's not going anywhere & you'll have the rest of life to experience it."
I never forget this. I am certainly not knocking those who choose to get married early. The thought of marriage excites me to no end. I'm happy to know that another exciting phase in life awaits when I'm done.
likewtr4chklit
New Member
I'm about to marry my SO/son's father. We've already settled into family life and have decided that we want to spend the rest of our days together so....we're gonna jump the broom. *I'm guilty of the facebook engagment announcement*
ETA: I'm 21 by the way.
ETA: I'm 21 by the way.
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ms*x
Active Member
i feel y'all.
i was born and raised in chi and had to go to detroit to find a brother with sense. now THAT'S where the brother are!
one thing i can say is there was never any shortage of single friends that my man had. and those are some hard-working brothers and just as clean cut as those chi brothers.
well...maybe not as pretty as my chi brethren - but they'll do...definitely.
you may get a melon or chartreuse stacy adams-wearing brother (lol! with matching socks), but don't think for one second that he doesn't have sense, money, power or true love to give.
saved06
New Member
I'm starting to believe, you can never prepare for marriage so to speak. We all try to get everything "done" and ready before, but it seems like marriage is something you figure out once you get there. Everyone wants to be financially stable before but what happens when in the marriage the finances are not stable
I'm seeing it's all about working together, and if you marry the right person you should still be able to follow your path because your path and his should align together....just my thoughts
I'm seeing it's all about working together, and if you marry the right person you should still be able to follow your path because your path and his should align together....just my thoughts
hunnyhun921
Member
I got engaged at 23. Still engaged now at 26. The wedding is scheduled for next year. I think the long engagement was worth it. We have become much closer within these last past years. We have been together since we were 15. I'm glad that we didn't rush and get married right after the engagment. There were still a few issues we had to straighten out. It's all good now!!!
Farida
Well-Known Member
I was engaged in my early 20's. What helped is we both knew that each of us had dreams and we were willing to sacrifice to help each other achieve them. I supported my husband when he studied abroad. He is willing to support me when I study abroad. He moved with me and is working to support me while I achieve one of my goals. After this I will move and work with him to work on his dream. Then we want to travel. For me, with no kids in the picture...and two people willing to compromise...no boundaries.
ManeVixen
Well-Known Member
I'm starting to believe, you can never prepare for marriage so to speak. We all try to get everything "done" and ready before, but it seems like marriage is something you figure out once you get there. Everyone wants to be financially stable before but what happens when in the marriage the finances are not stable
I'm seeing it's all about working together, and if you marry the right person you should still be able to follow your path because your path and his should align together....just my thoughts
I agree with the bolded Im 22 and am soo ready to atleast be engaged..ive been with my SO for three years and weve lived together for 2 yrs and 8 months i feel like i have the normal freedoms of any 22 yr old i go to school, hang out, travel whatever..I dont understand why ppl think because you get married you cant follow your dreams or have fun
erplexed Ive been blessed because my SO follows his dreams hard and is behind me pushing me to follow mine even harder..he is my best friend and we know we want to be together forever so what am I waiting for? Trust the pickings are slim so if the good lord created a great SO just for you hold on to him
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