2012 Whats happening Relationship Folks
- Thread starter firecracker
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msbettyboop
Well-Known Member
I was next to the phone last night when it rang. I looked sideways for barely a second and didn't register the name. I thought it was his guy friend who had called him earlier in the evening and had mentioned he would call again. I said "why on earth is this guy calling you now? Is he in love with you or what?" He said, "sorry about that." and switched off the phone. Later on when I processed, it registered I'd seen a girl's name. Normally, I wouldn't mind but it was 2 am in the morning. Why is a girl calling my bf at 2 am in the morning and it wasn't his mum or sister either cos I know all their names. I trust him but I still wanna know why a girl is calling him at 2 am in the morning. I haven't said anything cos not sure how to proceed with it.
He went along with it like it was a male friend (even though the phone said otherwise) and didn't explain who it was except "sorry", but you trust him?
Not saying you shouldn't because I don't know him personally, but imo please be cautious. It doesn't sound right. I think I'd just ask him who that annoying person was calling so late at night and see if he says it was a guy friend, or avoids the question again.
msbettyboop
Well-Known Member
Vanthie said:
Well, I didn't really ask him and he switched off the phone without looking at the screen so there was no scenario set for explanations.
MzLady78
Well-Known Member
It goes through cycles. Sometimes everyone is doing really well and others everyone is hating anything with a penis.
Je Ne Sais Quoi
Well-Known Member
I'm sorry but on this vacation I farted a ton while we slept. This morning I farted while sleeping and woke up laughing 
so just 
Sent from the corner pay phone
so just Sent from the corner pay phone
AHeadOfCoils
Well-Known Member
Things are going good with the widdle man and I. We haven't done it again, so of course things are great.
We've been out almost 5x's since that night and honestly, I don't even want to do it to him again. I love hanging with him, we have SO MUCH fun, and he's a gentleman. No sense in messing that up.
We've been out almost 5x's since that night and honestly, I don't even want to do it to him again. I love hanging with him, we have SO MUCH fun, and he's a gentleman. No sense in messing that up.
qchelle
Well-Known Member
So I sent him some shopping carts full of hair products from different sites that i want to try lol (Christmas gift). And he called me, frustrated that one of the sites was acting funny/not loading properly. well wtf do you want me to do about it? keep trying! lol
We're about to start planning a Christmas vacation yayy
We're about to start planning a Christmas vacation yayy
Boujoichic
New Member
As of last night I'm no longer single. Thing is I can't really be happy about it because he was someone I just planned on dating or even just fooling around with. He is younger than me and doesn't have his sh*t together just yet. I agreed to be his girl partially out of shock and partially because I just wanna be in a relationship. I'm willing to give it a try I keep thinking to myself its not marriage and I can change my mind.
deltadreamland
Well-Known Member
Glad that's over. He was back to his jovial self today. We spent the day cooking, watching football and shopping...so much better than the issues he had with people yesterday.
BGT
Well-Known Member
I saw this on Pinterest and thought I'd share. It's great info for any type of couple.
http://www.danoah.com/2012/10/16-ways-i-blew-my-marriage.html
You know what blows big time?
The other night I was sitting with my family, most of whom are very successfully married. We were going in a circle giving our best marriage advice to my little sister on the eve of her wedding. It’s somewhat of a family tradition.
But that’s not what blows. What really blows is that I realized I don’t have any good marriage advice to give. After all, I’ve never had a successful marriage out of the two marriages I did have.
And so, when it was my turn, I just made a joke about divorce and how you should always remember why you loved your spouse when you first met her so that when times get tough, you can find someone new that is just like she was.
There were a couple courtesy giggles, but overall my humor wasn’t welcome in such a beautifully building ring of profundity.
They finished round one, and for some reason started into another round. And that’s when I realized. Hey. I don’t have marriage advice to give, but I have plenty of “keep your marriage from ending” advice (two equivocally different things), and that might be almost as good.
It eventually came to me again, and what I said would have been such great advice if I were a tenth as good at saying things as I was at writing them.
And so, that night, I sat down and wrote out my “advice list” for my little sister. You know… things I wish I would have known or done differently so that I didn’t end up divorced (twice). After writing it, I thought maybe I’d share it with all of you, too.
I call it my “Ways I Blew My Marriage” list. Also, for the list’s sake, I am just going to refer to “her” instead of “them” even though they almost all were true in both marriages.
1. DON’T STOP HOLDING HER HAND
When I first dated the woman I ended up marrying, I always held her hand. In the car. While walking. At meals. At movies. It didn’t matter where. Over time, I stopped. I made up excuses like my hand was too hot or it made me sweat or I wasn’t comfortable with it in public. Truth was, I stopped holding hands because I stopped wanting to put in the effort to be close to my wife. No other reason.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d hold her hand in the car. I’d hold her hand on a star. I’d hold her hand in a box. I’d hold her hand with a fox. And I’d hold her hand everywhere else, too, even when we didn’t particularly like each other for the moment.
BONUS! When you hold hands in the winter, they don’t get cold. True story.
2. DON’T STOP TRYING TO BE ATTRACTIVE.
Obviously when I was working to woo her, I would do myself up as attractively as I possibly could every time I saw her. I kept perfectly groomed. I always smelled good. I held in my farts until she wasn’t around. For some reason, marriage made me feel like I could stop doing all that. I would get all properly groomed, smelling good, and dressed up any time we went out somewhere or I went out by myself, but I rarely, if ever, cared about making myself attractive just for her.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d try and put my best foot forward throughout our entire marriage. I’d wait to fart until I was in the bathroom whenever possible. I’d make myself desirable so that she would desire me.
BONUS! when you trim your man hair, guess what. She returns the favor.
3. DON’T ALWAYS POINT OUT HER WEAKNESSES.
For some reason, somewhere along the way, I always ended up feeling like it was my place to tell her where she was weak and where she could do better. I sure as heck didn’t do that while we were dating. No, when I dated her I only built her up, only told her how amazing she was, and easily looked past all of her flaws. After we got married though, she sometimes couldn’t even cook eggs without me telling her how she might be able to improve.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I wouldn’t say a damned thing about anything that I thought could use improvement. I’ve learned since my marriage ended that there is more than one right way to do most things, and that the imperfections of others are too beautiful to try and change.
BONUS! when you tell her what she’s doing right, she’ll tell you what you’re doing right. And she’ll also tell her friends. And her family. And the dentist. And even strangers on the street.
4. DON’T STOP COOKING FOR HER.
I knew how to woo a girl, for sure. And the ticket was usually a night in, cooking a nice meal and having a romantic evening. So why is it then, that I didn’t do that for her after we got married? Sure, I’d throw some canned soup in the microwave or fry up some chimichangas once in a while, but I rarely if ever went out of my way to sweep her off her feet after we were married by steaming crab legs, or making fancy pasta, or setting up a candlelit table.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d make it a priority to cook for her, and only her, something awesome at least every month. And I’d remember that meat in a can is never awesome.
BONUS! candlelit dinners often lead to candlelit bow chica bow-wow.
5. DON’T YELL AT YOUR SPOUSE.
I’m not talking about the angry kind of yelling. I’m talking about the lazy kind of yelling. The kind of yelling you do when you don’t want to get up from your television show or you don’t want to go ALL THE WAY UPSTAIRS to ask her if she’s seen your keys. It really doesn’t take that much effort to go find her, and yelling (by nature) sounds demanding and authoritative.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d try to go find her anytime I needed something or wanted to know something, and I’d have both gratitude and manners when I did. I always hated when she would yell to me, so why did I always feel it was okay to yell to her?
BONUS! sometimes you catch her doing something cute that you would have missed otherwise.
6. DON’T CALL NAMES.
I always felt I was the king of not calling names, but I wasn’t. I may not have called her stupid, or idiot, or any of the other names she’d sometimes call me, but I would tell her she was stubborn, or that she was impossible, or that she was so hard to deal with. Names are names, and calling them will drive bigger wedges in communication than just about anything else.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: Any time it got to the point that I wanted to call names, I’d call a time-out and come back to it later. Or better yet, I’d call her names, but they’d be names like “super sexy” or “hotness.” Even in the heat of the moment.
BONUS! she’ll call you names in better places. Like the bedroom.
http://www.danoah.com/2012/10/16-ways-i-blew-my-marriage.html
You know what blows big time?
The other night I was sitting with my family, most of whom are very successfully married. We were going in a circle giving our best marriage advice to my little sister on the eve of her wedding. It’s somewhat of a family tradition.
But that’s not what blows. What really blows is that I realized I don’t have any good marriage advice to give. After all, I’ve never had a successful marriage out of the two marriages I did have.
And so, when it was my turn, I just made a joke about divorce and how you should always remember why you loved your spouse when you first met her so that when times get tough, you can find someone new that is just like she was.
There were a couple courtesy giggles, but overall my humor wasn’t welcome in such a beautifully building ring of profundity.
They finished round one, and for some reason started into another round. And that’s when I realized. Hey. I don’t have marriage advice to give, but I have plenty of “keep your marriage from ending” advice (two equivocally different things), and that might be almost as good.
It eventually came to me again, and what I said would have been such great advice if I were a tenth as good at saying things as I was at writing them.
And so, that night, I sat down and wrote out my “advice list” for my little sister. You know… things I wish I would have known or done differently so that I didn’t end up divorced (twice). After writing it, I thought maybe I’d share it with all of you, too.
I call it my “Ways I Blew My Marriage” list. Also, for the list’s sake, I am just going to refer to “her” instead of “them” even though they almost all were true in both marriages.
1. DON’T STOP HOLDING HER HAND
When I first dated the woman I ended up marrying, I always held her hand. In the car. While walking. At meals. At movies. It didn’t matter where. Over time, I stopped. I made up excuses like my hand was too hot or it made me sweat or I wasn’t comfortable with it in public. Truth was, I stopped holding hands because I stopped wanting to put in the effort to be close to my wife. No other reason.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d hold her hand in the car. I’d hold her hand on a star. I’d hold her hand in a box. I’d hold her hand with a fox. And I’d hold her hand everywhere else, too, even when we didn’t particularly like each other for the moment.
BONUS! When you hold hands in the winter, they don’t get cold. True story.
2. DON’T STOP TRYING TO BE ATTRACTIVE.
Obviously when I was working to woo her, I would do myself up as attractively as I possibly could every time I saw her. I kept perfectly groomed. I always smelled good. I held in my farts until she wasn’t around. For some reason, marriage made me feel like I could stop doing all that. I would get all properly groomed, smelling good, and dressed up any time we went out somewhere or I went out by myself, but I rarely, if ever, cared about making myself attractive just for her.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d try and put my best foot forward throughout our entire marriage. I’d wait to fart until I was in the bathroom whenever possible. I’d make myself desirable so that she would desire me.
BONUS! when you trim your man hair, guess what. She returns the favor.
3. DON’T ALWAYS POINT OUT HER WEAKNESSES.
For some reason, somewhere along the way, I always ended up feeling like it was my place to tell her where she was weak and where she could do better. I sure as heck didn’t do that while we were dating. No, when I dated her I only built her up, only told her how amazing she was, and easily looked past all of her flaws. After we got married though, she sometimes couldn’t even cook eggs without me telling her how she might be able to improve.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I wouldn’t say a damned thing about anything that I thought could use improvement. I’ve learned since my marriage ended that there is more than one right way to do most things, and that the imperfections of others are too beautiful to try and change.
BONUS! when you tell her what she’s doing right, she’ll tell you what you’re doing right. And she’ll also tell her friends. And her family. And the dentist. And even strangers on the street.
4. DON’T STOP COOKING FOR HER.
I knew how to woo a girl, for sure. And the ticket was usually a night in, cooking a nice meal and having a romantic evening. So why is it then, that I didn’t do that for her after we got married? Sure, I’d throw some canned soup in the microwave or fry up some chimichangas once in a while, but I rarely if ever went out of my way to sweep her off her feet after we were married by steaming crab legs, or making fancy pasta, or setting up a candlelit table.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d make it a priority to cook for her, and only her, something awesome at least every month. And I’d remember that meat in a can is never awesome.
BONUS! candlelit dinners often lead to candlelit bow chica bow-wow.
5. DON’T YELL AT YOUR SPOUSE.
I’m not talking about the angry kind of yelling. I’m talking about the lazy kind of yelling. The kind of yelling you do when you don’t want to get up from your television show or you don’t want to go ALL THE WAY UPSTAIRS to ask her if she’s seen your keys. It really doesn’t take that much effort to go find her, and yelling (by nature) sounds demanding and authoritative.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: I’d try to go find her anytime I needed something or wanted to know something, and I’d have both gratitude and manners when I did. I always hated when she would yell to me, so why did I always feel it was okay to yell to her?
BONUS! sometimes you catch her doing something cute that you would have missed otherwise.
6. DON’T CALL NAMES.
I always felt I was the king of not calling names, but I wasn’t. I may not have called her stupid, or idiot, or any of the other names she’d sometimes call me, but I would tell her she was stubborn, or that she was impossible, or that she was so hard to deal with. Names are names, and calling them will drive bigger wedges in communication than just about anything else.
IF I COULD HAVE A DO-OVER: Any time it got to the point that I wanted to call names, I’d call a time-out and come back to it later. Or better yet, I’d call her names, but they’d be names like “super sexy” or “hotness.” Even in the heat of the moment.
BONUS! she’ll call you names in better places. Like the bedroom.
Lucie
Dancin' on sunshine!
I feel really good today. I was upset on Friday but I am grateful for what occurred. I learned that life gives you lessons to teach you what you do and do NOT want. I also learned that if I have faith all will turn out well. I saw that this morning with a situation that bothered me. I didn't even have to open my mouth, someone took care of the problem for me. I feel really optimistic.
I feel really optimistic.
VeryBecoming
Devil's Avocado
I survived four days with his family. They're all pretty nice, very different. If they didn't all look alike I would really think he's adopted. His middle sister is this impulsive free spirit who is packing up and moving to India to become a Bollywood star. His older sister is really responsible, serious and SAHM. But they're both talkative and open. He's the complete opposite. Even his mom talks a lot. They assured me he's always been that way and that it isn't just me
His hippie sister gave me a ring with some energy in it or something and his mom gifted me a pair of earrings and a necklace from India. She wanted to take me shopping and starting making all these plans for me to visit again.
Each couple cooked on one of the days and SO and I totally won. His two brother in laws and one sister pretended the food made them sick. So I'm sitting at the table near tears, afraid that I poisoned his family. I couldn't even eat. SO literally looks around and says
"eh, maybe they're allergic...more food for me!" Once they realized they couldn't get him to care they told me they were joking and I about died. It was hilarious but I was seriously thinking great....you bring a girl home and she poisons your entire family
ETA: I smell like curry! It's embedded in my pores. I've showered and scrubbed but it won't go away.
His hippie sister gave me a ring with some energy in it or something and his mom gifted me a pair of earrings and a necklace from India. She wanted to take me shopping and starting making all these plans for me to visit again.
Each couple cooked on one of the days and SO and I totally won. His two brother in laws and one sister pretended the food made them sick. So I'm sitting at the table near tears, afraid that I poisoned his family. I couldn't even eat. SO literally looks around and says
"eh, maybe they're allergic...more food for me!" Once they realized they couldn't get him to care they told me they were joking and I about died. It was hilarious but I was seriously thinking great....you bring a girl home and she poisons your entire family
ETA: I smell like curry! It's embedded in my pores. I've showered and scrubbed but it won't go away.
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.Ms_Delikate
Well-Known Member
Marking my place..I love reading this thread
Fine 4s
Well-Known Member
You know, having a man cheat on you, take you for granted, lie, be inappropriate and any other topics we've discussed here is not the end of the world. When you focus on self-improvement and achieving your spiritual, physical, financial, career, health and educational goals, you realize that that bad situation you are or were in has absolutely nothing to do with your potential. You will still be AWESOME no matter WHAT or no matter WHO if you chose to be.
Really think about it? So what if that person broke your heart to pieces? You still have to put one foot in front I the other everyday like ALL of us. So now what!? Live your life!!!!!! It's yours, not his not hers YOURS so effin ROCK It!!!!!!!!!
When you realize the control you have over YOUR life, your decisions, your happiness etc. who cares what someone else does? Keep moving and reaching for YOUR best self. Isn't that what we're here to achieve?
[end vent]
Of course tomorrow ill be planning my life with him lol- but right now, I'm empowered by self....
Really think about it? So what if that person broke your heart to pieces? You still have to put one foot in front I the other everyday like ALL of us. So now what!? Live your life!!!!!! It's yours, not his not hers YOURS so effin ROCK It!!!!!!!!!
When you realize the control you have over YOUR life, your decisions, your happiness etc. who cares what someone else does? Keep moving and reaching for YOUR best self. Isn't that what we're here to achieve?
[end vent]
Of course tomorrow ill be planning my life with him lol- but right now, I'm empowered by self....
FelaShrine
Well-Known Member
barbiesocialite
Well-Known Member
and there he is.......*pfftttttttttt*
Briabiggles
Well-Known Member
He keeps sending me silly drawings. Cute!
Sent from my iPhone. Excuse the typos!
Sent from my iPhone. Excuse the typos!
CaliiSwagg
Well-Known Member
aint a dayum thing goin on in my personal life. I think about having a boo but then I have a glass of wine and the thought vanishes 
VeryBecoming
Devil's Avocado
He's in California all week. I didn't text him or answer his calls yesterday...I was really sleepy and full of queso Besides, he could stand to miss me a little bit.
Besides, he could stand to miss me a little bit.
InchHighPrivateEye
Well-Known Member
I look like crap-and do NOT feel like fixing myself--I have cramps and I smell like barbecue sauce (don't ask ) and he wants to see me tonight. Normally I would love to but today, that's that ish I don't like. These Hillary Clinton pantsuit pants sure feel tight 
eta: I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE him! He called to see if we were seeing each other and when he heard my voice he was like "you sound like you don't feel good." I don't "Do you want me to come to your house?" No "you love me?" Yes; goodbye "goodbye" I don't understand why my legs feel so fat today. I'm a tiny lil thang.
As I have a meltdown...aunt flo
) and he wants to see me tonight. Normally I would love to but today, that's that ish I don't like. These Hillary Clinton pantsuit pants sure feel tight eta: I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE him! He called to see if we were seeing each other and when he heard my voice he was like "you sound like you don't feel good." I don't
"Do you want me to come to your house?" No "you love me?" Yes; goodbye "goodbye" I don't understand why my legs feel so fat today. I'm a tiny lil thang. As I have a meltdown...aunt flo
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Je Ne Sais Quoi
Well-Known Member
Smh at the conversation we had earlier.
Sent from the corner pay phone
Sent from the corner pay phone
barbiesocialite
Well-Known Member
I'm about *this* close to wanting to have sex.
but naw, he ain't gonna get that lucky. too much work and he's gonna wanna cuddle and all that bs. no thanks. we aren't there yet.
but naw, he ain't gonna get that lucky. too much work and he's gonna wanna cuddle and all that bs. no thanks. we aren't there yet.
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