Glamorous_chic
Well-Known Member
So, i'm watching Poldark(set in the 1700's), which is sooo sooo good. And its like it all just clicked together. So, Poldark has his tragic love for Elizabeth-the lady who is high society and his wife Demelza (spelling?) who doesn't think she's good enough for him, b/c she was a maid and married into a well known family.
So, there was a scene in the show that made me so angry. The character Poldark is helping to take care of this cousins wife, and selling all that he has to keep her in the lifestyle she is accustomed to. Meanwhile, his own wife is getting blisters in her hand, and working like a mule, while he ignores her. When it is brought to his attention, hey you're broke, and your own family needs this money, his response is my wife is used to hard work, she'll survive, while elizabeth is not used to the life. His wife never felt like she belonged, therefore she never asked for much. While elizabeth, it was jus an expectation that she would be given the world.
watching this made me soo angry for a multitude of reasons. It really, just reminded me that in relationships what you expect is how you will be treated. It reminded me of the constant fb post about men stating that they want the woman who suggests applebees so they can get the 2 for $20 deal. I see on Facebook all the time, when talk of relationships come up, a multitude of women, being the first to proclaim that they don't require much, they will suggest the 2 for 20. They are fine with netflix and chill, so their man can stack his money. Or "i might invite him over and cook and we can watch the fire stick" or, "i'm a cheap date". and it angers me so much. not b/c spending lots of money on a date means the person is quality, but damn, can we at least have the expectation of being properly courted?can the netflix and chill come once we are in an established relationship? the early days of dating is SUPPOSED TO BE when the man is going out of his way to impress us. Enjoy that time. The first date should not be you cooking for him, or watching the jailbroken fire stick. save that for later in the relationship. When you set the bar low, that is how you will be treated. what has having these low expectations really gotten us? like, this is a real question. i'm sure everyone has the hood fairytale story of the girl dating the guy, who is on hard times, she suggested applebees, then he knew she was the one, he stacked his coins and is now a millionaire. i'm being faceoutous but this was just nagging on my brain.
I'm PMSing so excuse my rambling. Anyways, all this rambling just to say, women we have got to stop selling ourselves short. and honestly, this goes both ways, in romantic relationships, friendships, and work. if you are always selling yourself short at work. constantly unsure of yourself, people will doubt your knowledge and abilities. and soon, they will be unsure of your work too. you create your own energy of doubt and negativity.
So, there was a scene in the show that made me so angry. The character Poldark is helping to take care of this cousins wife, and selling all that he has to keep her in the lifestyle she is accustomed to. Meanwhile, his own wife is getting blisters in her hand, and working like a mule, while he ignores her. When it is brought to his attention, hey you're broke, and your own family needs this money, his response is my wife is used to hard work, she'll survive, while elizabeth is not used to the life. His wife never felt like she belonged, therefore she never asked for much. While elizabeth, it was jus an expectation that she would be given the world.
watching this made me soo angry for a multitude of reasons. It really, just reminded me that in relationships what you expect is how you will be treated. It reminded me of the constant fb post about men stating that they want the woman who suggests applebees so they can get the 2 for $20 deal. I see on Facebook all the time, when talk of relationships come up, a multitude of women, being the first to proclaim that they don't require much, they will suggest the 2 for 20. They are fine with netflix and chill, so their man can stack his money. Or "i might invite him over and cook and we can watch the fire stick" or, "i'm a cheap date". and it angers me so much. not b/c spending lots of money on a date means the person is quality, but damn, can we at least have the expectation of being properly courted?can the netflix and chill come once we are in an established relationship? the early days of dating is SUPPOSED TO BE when the man is going out of his way to impress us. Enjoy that time. The first date should not be you cooking for him, or watching the jailbroken fire stick. save that for later in the relationship. When you set the bar low, that is how you will be treated. what has having these low expectations really gotten us? like, this is a real question. i'm sure everyone has the hood fairytale story of the girl dating the guy, who is on hard times, she suggested applebees, then he knew she was the one, he stacked his coins and is now a millionaire. i'm being faceoutous but this was just nagging on my brain.
I'm PMSing so excuse my rambling. Anyways, all this rambling just to say, women we have got to stop selling ourselves short. and honestly, this goes both ways, in romantic relationships, friendships, and work. if you are always selling yourself short at work. constantly unsure of yourself, people will doubt your knowledge and abilities. and soon, they will be unsure of your work too. you create your own energy of doubt and negativity.
NO downgrades. And this isn't just about material things. I think a person should add net positive value to your life in all areas. If he's not, cut him loose. If a woman knows her value, the right man will see that and step up. It might take time, but he's out there. The tragedy is that we often discount ourselves for a piece of a man.
