Yet another natural craving relaxed hair....

[sheba1]

Gosh, I hate to be another one of those posts. But this is really bugging me. And I have nowhere else to turn. erplexed My bf is looking at me like I'm crazy. Like I have some sort of bipolar hair mania or something. One week I'm loving being natural. The next I want a perm. Ok, I'm loving being natural for a whole month! And then, again, I want a perm! This is rediculous. And I don't guess it will ever stop. I guess I'll always want a little of both? So does this mean texlaxing might be the way for me? If I texlax, will I have baby smooth roller sets like relaxed ladies? Cuz that's my weakness. I don't feel that being natural has any kind of draw backs except for the smooth bouncy roller set and silk wrap. That's what I want and it seems, at least, for now that's what I can't have.

I was looking at the thread about ChinaBlack's youtube roller set and I was . And then after looking at her hair journey http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDB-_-qXzKE&NR=1 I realized she has fine 4a/b hair like me. And if she can have hair that looks that full and luscious with proper care, so can I right? I mean, I've been natural for 13 years. But not because of any real desire to be natural. I just got tired of having thin (abused, relaxed to frequently/improperly) hair and just stopped getting perms and started waving my hair with water and gel instead. It took off growing and it's been in wigs or braids or "protected" one way or another ever since. I say "protected" because I didn't know anything about protection then. I was just styling my hair. Not really protecting... lol I did not wash, moisturize or comb properly so I suffered much damage over the years. So much so, that I bc'd my already natural hair 3 years ago and started cornrowing it under wigs once it got long enough again. It's grown back thicker and with less breakage. It's healthy now, but I think I want to relax. I hate this dilemma and I have no real question here. You're welcome to just post your thoughts on the subject. sigh...

ETA: I guess I do have a question... if I really want to try to see if my hair can be healthy and beautiful while relaxed, should I? I mean, does it really make sense to remain natural if the only reason is fear?

 

[yodie]

I say go for it. You never know until you try. I was texlaxed and loved it until my hair started falling out. My hair can't take texlaxing or relaxing. I'd definitely wear a relaxer if I could, but I can't.

I was able to do rollersets with my texlax. I think it comes down to the products and technique you use in order to give you that smooth set. You can always go over it with a flat iron.

The great thing about it is, if you don't like being texlaxed, you can always transition back to natural.

The freedom to choose is key!

 

[msa]

If you feel like you know enough to have the healthy relaxd hair you want, then relax. It's just hair right? It'll grow back. May as well give it a chance instead of always wondering if you should have.

Personally, I don't think you should relax. You can have silky straight hair once you learn the right techniques.

 

[DozenRoses99]

I agree with the other ladies. If you really have a strong desire to relax and you have given it plenty of thought and research, then you should relax. If you do relax your hair and change your mind, you can always go back to natural. I've seen threads by former naturals who say that relaxing their hair was the best thing for them. Others regret it then transition back to natural. Its all about doing what's best for you.

 

[syncerelyhis]

I've seriously been considering relaxing too!

 

[Supervixen]

After 2.5 years of transitioning, I was seriously considering texlaxing too...until Sunday. I discovered Sunday that rollersets using the ponytail method work well for me. It took about 55 minutes to dry and then I did a 5 minute, low heat flat iron of the roots to get the pony tail crinkles out.

Another member here (I can't recall her name) has a ponytail rollersetting video on YouTube that I used as a tutorial. My hair is very full with this rollerset and hasn't reverted a bit so far, which is very unusual when I flat iron. I've gotten a ton of compliments since Sunday (and even a lunch invitation from a guy I work with). I WAS the ponytail QUEEN.

Good luck. My bf has been looking at me like a nut too with my ups and downs about going natural over the last 2.5 years, so I know the feeling. I definitely encourage you to try to rollerset.

 

[vkb247]

Have you tried to get the results that you want without relaxing?

 

[lawyer2be371]

I feel the same way you do! I stop wearing a perm or relaxer which every one it was because I saw I could get good growth without a perm. Of course I didnt know the proper way to care for my hair so my hair never grew, I want to try a perm but I'm TERRIFFED!!! But I keep saying its hair if I lose it I know I can grow it back!!! SO that probably didnt help you any SORRY

 

[I'mBloomingWithin]

If you want to relax or texlax then go for it, especially if you are ready for change. I was natural for 9 months in 2002, then I relaxed again. In 2006 I decided to go natural again and had absolutely no problem bc'ing and growing out my natural. I relaxed again last year and if I feel like it I will chop all this relaxed APL hair off and start over again. I love our hair, it's so versatile you just can't be scared to take risk and have patience. Do what works for you.

 

[Evolving78]

DON'T DO IT MISS SOPHIA!

 

[levone]

I say go for it. I am natural and have been for over 6 years now and definitley have no desire to relax again (I have soft, fine hair as well, although it appears to be thick). Anyhow, when I discovered a stylist about 3 years ago that could press my hair and it had body and movement that looked BETTER than my relaxed hair, that sealed the deal for me.

However since then, I've moved on and since working on more 'natural' type styles such as two strand twists, twist outs, etc. I haven't straightened/flatironed my hair in over a year now and actually don't have a desire to anymore (especially with taking swimming classes now every week). I am however intrigued with working on my rollersets (LOVE curlformers, they work) though seeing all the recent threads.

With having said all that, it sounds like fear is the only thing holding you back. You seem to have learned how to properly take care of your hair so you should relax if you want to. I know I would if I had a strong desire to, lol....... Good luck with your decision!

 

[TCatt86]

Have you tried flat ironing or pressing it? Whenever I get the urge for a bouncy rollerset, though it's not often, I flat iron my hair.

 

[poetist]

DON'T DO IT MISS SOPHIA!

 

[sheba1]

Thank you, ladies, for all of your words. Whether you're for or against, I appreciate every single reply.

Have you tried flat ironing or pressing it? Whenever I get the urge for a bouncy rollerset, though it's not often, I flat iron my hair.

Oh yes and it was beautiful, especially for a first time. I did a roller set, first but my roller set and silk wrap was . LOL I used the ponytail method and just didn't get the results I was looking for. I will try it again and again and see if I can make it better. It did set the stage for a beautiful flat iron, though.

I feel that, even if I do relax, it won't be until this time, next year. I feel by then I will have the straightened length that I'm looking for and will have spent enough time with my properly cared for natural hair to make an informed decision. I may even be like Levone when I grow up and not even have any real desire for straigtening. Or have a braidout as serious as Syncerelyhis's and decide that I already have what I want. I'll stay focused on health and growth, for now. And I'm sure to find my answers after while.

Thanks again, everybody. You ladies are the best. You did not make me feel crazy. hahahaha

 

[Supervixen]

Thank you, ladies, for all of your words. Whether you're for or against, I appreciate every single reply.



Oh yes and it was beautiful, especially for a first time. I did a roller set, first but my roller set and silk wrap was . LOL I used the ponytail method and just didn't get the results I was looking for. I will try it again and again and see if I can make it better. It did set the stage for a beautiful flat iron, though.

I feel that, even if I do relax, it won't be until this time, next year. I feel by then I will have the straightened length that I'm looking for and will have spent enough time with my properly cared for natural hair to make an informed decision. I may even be like Levone when I grow up and not even have any real desire for straigtening. Or have a braidout as serious as Syncerelyhis's and decide that I already have what I want. I'll stay focused on health and growth, for now. And I'm sure to find my answers after while.

Thanks again, everybody. You ladies are the best. You did not make me feel crazy. hahahaha

What was wrong? Were the curls too tight? Maybe you need bigger rollers?

After you flat iron out the roots, maybe try to wrap it for a few minutes to overnight. Maybe a roller WRAP is a better way for you to loosen the curls.

 

[sheba1]

What was wrong? Were the curls too tight? Maybe you need bigger rollers?

After you flat iron out the roots, maybe try to wrap it for a few minutes to overnight. Maybe a roller WRAP is a better way for you to loosen the curls.

The roller set and silk wrap was a bit frizzier than I wanted. I'm thinking about going to the dominicans for a roller set, only and then attempting the silk wrap.

This is how it looked after my ponytail set.


After silk wrap. My bf called it Diana Ross hair. lol



Next two are 2 days after flat iron; had been wearing in a bun and moisturizing daily. My first successful flat iron! I am proud.

 

[Supervixen]

The roller set and silk wrap was a bit frizzier than I wanted. I'm thinking about going to the dominicans for a roller set, only and then attempting the silk wrap.

This is how it looked after my ponytail set.
View attachment 30091

After silk wrap. My bf called it Diana Ross hair. lol

View attachment 30093

Next two are 2 days after flat iron; had been wearing in a bun and moisturizing daily. My first successful flat iron! I am proud.
View attachment 30095

View attachment 30097

First, I think you did a good job! I think you just didn't let it dry enough. In the past my rollersets (when I was relaxed) would look like Diana Ross hair too because I didn't let it dry COMPLETELY. This time, I didn't let one section dry completely and that's EXACTLY how it looked. BUT, you're right, it set that section up for a nice looking (long lasting) flat iron.

Depending on how thick I make the sections it can take 55m to 1h 15m. I have a Sally's Ion Soft Bonnet Dryer and that thing get HOT! Unroll all the sections and make sure you're dry, if not, re-roll and continue drying. If a section feels MOIST even a little, you gotta stay under the dryer longer. I know my hair is DRY because as I unroll the roller, the hair bounces right back to the curl. If it hangs somewhat limp, it needs to dry more.

I really do think you did a good job, you just need more practice to tweak your drying time. I hope you won't give up on naturalness!

ASIDE: *I really need to get over my issues with putting pics/videos on the net.*