Would you be Mad?

[candy626]

Rather then make this into an issue, just don't do it when he trys to nudge you in the middle of the night.Tell him you need to get some rest, and that you prefer to do it before bed or when you wake up.

At the end of the day, the women controls when sex happens. Besides, the quality of the sex is so much better when you are both fully awake and both fully into it. Men have a hard time grasping this sometimes...

 

[Highly Favored8]

What if you are married or live with a man full time and he wakes you up on a regular basis between the hours of 2:00 A.M. thru 5:00 A.M. for coloring sessions knowing you have to get up for work at 6:00 A.M. I am not talking once every month or so I am talking at least 3-4 times a week.

Would you be mad at him?

Nope I would be very happy.

 

[wofford16]

I need my sleep and I'm not a morning person, so that wouldn't work for me. We'd have to work out some kind of compromise.

What do you do OP? Do you turn him down? Or do it and be tired?

Sent from my HTC Evo

It depends on how pissed I am when he wakes me up...I will admit that I did do it one time and fell asleep on his tail and he had the nerve to be pissed about it

 

[UrbainChic]

Rather then make this into an issue, just don't do it when he trys to nudge you in the middle of the night.Tell him you need to get some rest, and that you prefer to do it before bed or when you wake up.

At the end of the day, the women controls when sex happens. Besides, the quality of the sex is so much better when you are both fully awake and both fully into it. Men have a hard time grasping this sometimes...

I think it depends on the sex drive. I read somewhere that the partner with the lower sex drive ends up with more power in the relationship overall because the person with the higher sex drive will have to barter and be good to get enough sex to feel satisfied.

I am not really sure where I fall on the range but so far based off my experience I think I am on the higher end. I am always getting shut down. Tiring dudes out...I wish I was 100% in control of when it happens. I'd be getting it at least twice as much


maybe in the middle of the night too I haven't run into one of those men yet.

 

[wofford16]

My dh is like this. If you are uncomfortable now, then speak up or leave. It can get worse. If he doesn't respect your sleep now, he may not later when kids, illness, etc occur. And that type of selfishness can bleed over into other areas of your relationship. I'm not projecting, just speaking from 9 years of it.

carcajada I have been with this man off and on for 10 years and you are preaching to the choir. This issue only leads to other issues we have right now.

 

[wofford16]

Rather then make this into an issue, just don't do it when he trys to nudge you in the middle of the night.Tell him you need to get some rest, and that you prefer to do it before bed or when you wake up.

At the end of the day, the women controls when sex happens. Besides, the quality of the sex is so much better when you are both fully awake and both fully into it. Men have a hard time grasping this sometimes...

candy626 It has already become an issue, he thinks and talks about it so much it's unreal. I keep telling him if we have a grace period in between sessions it would be so much better for the both of us but in his mind, if I say no it's because I don't find him attractive anymore.

 

[NOEChic]

candy626 It has already become an issue, he thinks and talks about it so much it's unreal. I keep telling him if we have a grace period in between sessions it would be so much better for the both of us but in his mind, if I say no it's because I don't find him attractive anymore.

girl he is doing the most

 

[candy626]

I hear where you're coming from. I've dated guys who prefer frequency over quality.

My current SO gets this way sometimes. But what I do is sit down with him and try and remind of him of how much better our intimate time is when we are both really into it. I even try to point out examples of some of the best "times" we've had. He usually agrees that it is much better and eventually relents (though it might take some time).

 

[candy626]

I think it depends on the sex drive. I read somewhere that the partner with the lower sex drive ends up with more power in the relationship overall because the person with the higher sex drive will have to barter and be good to get enough sex to feel satisfied.

I am not really sure where I fall on the range but so far based off my experience I think I am on the higher end. I am always getting shut down. Tiring dudes out...I wish I was 100% in control of when it happens. I'd be getting it at least twice as much


maybe in the middle of the night too I haven't run into one of those men yet.

That's an interesting perspective. I guess I've always been the one with a lower sex drive.

 

[napbella]

Try waking him up when he is in a deep REM cycle several times a week. Might make him reconsider his own behavior.

 

[naturalmanenyc]

I guess it would depend on your sleep habits.

For me, no I would not be angry. I do not use an alarm clock and wake up on time 95% of the time, even if DH has woken me up at 5 a.m. I'm a night owl (probably obvious by my posting times) but DH gets up around 5 a.m. each day without an alarm (sometimes 4:30 a.m.)

Have you tried using the sleep calculator: http://sleepyti.me/ For a 5 a.m. nudge you could be in bed by 12:30 a.m. and still be fine for the work day if you are up at 5 a.m.....and if you have the option to go back to bed for a full sleep cycle after he leaves, even better.

It reads like he wakes you up after one of his sleep cycles. Maybe if the two of you go to bed at the same time, your sleep cycles would sync so you will not be tired when he wakes you up.

Of course all of this presumes that you even want to have sex at those times.

 

[wofford16]

Try waking him up when he is in a deep REM cycle several times a week. Might make him reconsider his own behavior.

napbella He's a hype, I tried that one time and his tail sprang right up and was ready for it. I swear he must have a push button for that thing because he was ready in 2.2 seconds

 

[wofford16]

I guess it would depend on your sleep habits.

For me, no I would not be angry. I do not use an alarm clock and wake up on time 95% of the time, even if DH has woken me up at 5 a.m. I'm a night owl (probably obvious by my posting times) but DH gets up around 5 a.m. each day without an alarm (sometimes 4:30 a.m.)

Have you tried using the sleep calculator: http://sleepyti.me/ For a 5 a.m. nudge you could be in bed by 12:30 a.m. and still be fine for the work day if you are up at 5 a.m.....and if you have the option to go back to bed for a full sleep cycle after he leaves, even better.

It reads like he wakes you up after one of his sleep cycles. Maybe if the two of you go to bed at the same time, your sleep cycles would sync so you will not be tired when he wakes you up.

Of course all of this presumes that you even want to have sex at those times.

naturalmanenyc This calculator had me all confused erplexed it gave me 4 different times to fall asleep if I need to be up at 6. This wouldn't work for us since DH doesn't have to be up at a certain time, he is a nite owl too so many times he is coming to bed well after midnight so when he goes to the bathroom in the middle of his sleep cycle that is when he wakes me up for coloring sessions.

 

[MD_Lady]

I think it depends on the sex drive. I read somewhere that the partner with the lower sex drive ends up with more power in the relationship overall because the person with the higher sex drive will have to barter and be good to get enough sex to feel satisfied.

I am not really sure where I fall on the range but so far based off my experience I think I am on the higher end. I am always getting shut down. Tiring dudes out...I wish I was 100% in control of when it happens. I'd be getting it at least twice as much


maybe in the middle of the night too I haven't run into one of those men yet.

X 10

 

[napbella]

wofford16, LOL dang girl I dont know what to tell you.

 

[Lucie]

I love sex but I love sleep more. My recent ex was like that. Selfish as one could be. He'd go to bed with the chickens. Wake me up around 5 and then keep talking to me after. Mind you I'd go to bed at 1/2:00. His atrocious snoring prevented me from sleeping well + early morning sex made me one ANGRY woman. Thank God he's gone!


OP, I don't think you're being selfish.

 

[Casarela]

Great! Waking me up at 4 or 5 is fine...it will give me a boost of energy! Early morning is the best time and it helps to start your day on the right foot.

 

[wofford16]

I love sex but I love sleep more. My recent ex was like that. Selfish as one could be. He'd go to bed with the chickens. Wake me up around 5 and then keep talking to me after. Mind you I'd go to bed at 1/2:00. His atrocious snoring prevented me from sleeping well + early morning sex made me one ANGRY woman. Thank God he's gone!


OP, I don't think you're being selfish.

I must have married your Ex-boyfriends brother or something because you described him to a "T", snoring and all.

 

[wannabelong]

I would be mad. I need my sleep.

 

[abcd09]

What if you are married or live with a man full time and he wakes you up on a regular basis between the hours of 2:00 A.M. thru 5:00 A.M. for coloring sessions knowing you have to get up for work at 6:00 A.M. I am not talking once every month or so I am talking at least 3-4 times a week.

Would you be mad at him?

That happened a lot in the first year and a half of dating. Considering once I wake up I cannot go back to sleep at some points I literally felt like crying I was so tired. I get teary eyed just thinking about it. If it happens now I literally beg him to please let me sleep. But I don't say no that often. Work requires 100% concentration and if Im tired I shut down. I dont like that feeling one bit.

 

[goldielocs]

What if you are married or live with a man full time and he wakes you up on a regular basis between the hours of 2:00 A.M. thru 5:00 A.M. for coloring sessions knowing you have to get up for work at 6:00 A.M. I am not talking once every month or so I am talking at least 3-4 times a week.

Would you be mad at him?

Nope. That's perfect for me .

I wake up 3-4am for the same reason and it keeps a smile on my face all day. I'm usually in the bed by 8pm so I'm not missing any sleep.

 

[Kindheart]

I need my sleep ,my job performance is way more important that some penis..
I really dont prioritize sex that much .

 

[PretteePlease]

Depends on if it helps or hinders you sleep process. Sometimes a good one will put you into the deepest sleep evah!

That being said in general I cherish my sleep and sometimes have sleep issues. We would have to get it in at a more convenient hour.

 

[jazzmere]

heck ya! my hubby does that to me all the time no consideration! jus thinking about his own needs!

 

[Babysaffy]

I'd be celebrating everyday! That guy would get a full cooked breakfast from me every morning

Jealous.

Sent from my Sony Xperia Arc

 

[hopeful]

Every now and then is okay, but on a regular basis when he knows you need and want your sleep is not cool. Not sure how you can deal with this long-term. Talk it out and figure out a compromise. What he is doing is selfish IMO.

 

[wofford16]

Depends on if it helps or hinders you sleep process. Sometimes a good one will put you into the deepest sleep evah!

That being said in general I cherish my sleep and sometimes have sleep issues. We would have to get it in at a more convenient hour.

Not in this case when he is waking me up out of a good sleep to "color", sometimes waking me up AFTER he put me to sleep a few hours ago.

 

[MD_Lady]

Not in this case when he is waking me up out of a good sleep to "color", sometimes waking me up AFTER he put me to sleep a few hours ago.

Nah, that's not cool. But even if it weren't round 2, he should still respect your feelings and not make you feel bad about having a different drive than he does.

 

[ElizaBlue]

No maam. I would consider myself pretty lucky. I would pass over sleep for a good wang any day.

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wofford16 nappystorm

Ditto. Not mad...Blessed...but then again I see sex differently than most women...maybe.