Why do you relax?

[maxineshaw]

Relaxed or natural, everyone is welcome in every thread on long hair care forum (one of the reason's I like it so much).

I did not feel forced at all to relaxed, I just play in orchestra's and band's and I just got tired of people telling me that they could not see around my hair and me not being able to do anything about it except never wear my hair out (which is what I enjoyed most). Most of the people around me loved my natural hair, all of the styles I did, and were more curious than anything else.

I am very comfortable with my decision because I can still wear my hair in textured styles, I can actually wear it straight (which was impossible as a type 4 natural in humid Florida w/o risk of heat damage) and I just enjoy my hair in general.

......I'm sorry but

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

Relaxed or natural, everyone is welcome in every thread on long hair care forum (one of the reason's I like it so much).

I did not feel forced at all to relaxed, I just play in orchestra's and band's and I just got tired of people telling me that they could not see around my hair and me not being able to do anything about it except never wear my hair out (which is what I enjoyed most). Most of the people around me loved my natural hair, all of the styles I did, and were more curious than anything else.

I am very comfortable with my decision because I can still wear my hair in textured styles, I can actually wear it straight (which was impossible as a type 4 natural in humid Florida w/o risk of heat damage) and I just enjoy my hair in general.

That's great. I was hoping that you didn't relax because you felt pressured but because you honestly liked your hair that way.

 

[exoticmommie]

Cause I want to.

Seriously though, I LOVE having some texture/crinkles. I love not having lots of shrinkage (I have TONS in my natural state). Now I have a little and to me its perfect. Crinkles with some hang.

I also love not having to use the blow dryer. I LOVE air drying. And once I cut off the bone straight ends. I plan to do wash and gos.

 

[simplyhair]

subscribing so I can read later

 

[Guinan]

I texlax b/c it is easier for me to manage my hair & I feel like I can really enjoy my hair both the natural & texlax parts

I know this is from the crates

 

[xcuzememiss]

Bc I think I'm addicted. In all honesty, it's an easier regimen for me to maintain vs a heat trained natural.. *aint nobody got time for dat!"

 

[EnExitStageLeft]

Cause I want to

^^^ what she said

 

[NaiyaAi]

I'm too lazy to transition and a BC is not in the cards for me.

 

[mschristine]

Busy and hectic lifestyle and I don't have time for long detangling sessions, twisted nightly or washing in sections

 

[yuhlovevybz]

Everyone can do what they want with their hair, just chiming in my lil opinion.

I always wonder why people say being natural takes too much time. I don't spend anymore time in my hair now then I did when I was relaxed, besides adding washing my hair with the rest of my body when I shower in the morning. Straightening my natural hair takes as long as it did to straighten my relaxed hair. For some reason when it was relaxed it seemed more course.

If being natural tool that long I would've relaxed by now. I guess it requires patience because it was much harder when it was shorter, but I think all hair is.

Now complicated regimens...I just don't get. Tried it and said its just not that serious. Long as I condition, detangle, and stay on top of my physical health I see no need to do more than that.

And I don't walk around looking crazy either. Curly ponytail or bun, or straight and bun.

Anyways, I don't see a prob w relaxing, ppl like whatever look they want.

Edit: I don't wash in sections either. I hop in the shower, wash ma body, put conditioner in and rinse, leave some in, brush it thru my hair, shake like a puppy and I'm done.

 

[kandiekj100]

Since college I've switched between natural and relaxed at whim (I think this makes my 3rd time going back to relaxers after going natural my first time in college).

This time around I relaxed because I was going through a straight hair phase. I live in Florida and I just didn't see myself being a straight-haired natural or should I say putting in the work to be a straight-haired natural, especially since I workout I now. For me, the best thing is to just relax.

I can definitely see myself chopping it off again. For now, I'm just enjoying it.

 

[HeChangedMyName]

I'm not relaxed anymore, but I wanted to answer anyway. I use to relax because I was a believer that relaxed hair was easier to manage and that my own natural hair was bad and misbehaved and couldn't be wrangled into anything decent looking. I had my first relaxer at age 12 because my hair just was a mess. well, the relaxer snatched out what hair I did have. THEN I got a curly perm. My hair thrived(because it stayed wet 100% of the time I'm sure) I got out of the curly perm after a couple of years and went back to the relaxer(same reason as before). I struggled with breaking, shedding, and thin hair that wouldn't go beyond a certain length for 20 years until I transitioned to natural. NOw I love it, and in just a short year, I have regrown ALL the hair that I cut off in my BC.

Do I think relaxers are bad? No
Do I think most people have a legit reason to relax? No
I think everyone should do what is best for them, just recognizing that what works best for you, may or may not always be best for your hair.

We all have to choose, hair vs. convenience vs. familiarity vs. whatever our own personal beliefs are about hair.

 

[nerdography]

I've switched back and forth between relaxed and natural since childhood. I find that it's easier for me to care of my hair when relaxed and it's much healthier. I have about nine months worth of new growth, because I planned on going natural again. But, the nightmare of my natural hair matted is to much for me. So, I decided to texlax my hair this weekend.

While I love wearing my hair natural is takes way to long to care for it. When relaxed it takes me a hour to do my hair. Natural it takes a hour just to detangle, and I had to pre-poo two hours before that or my hair won't have enough slip. And even then I have two patches that refuse to stay un-matted and dread the minute water stops running over it.

And on top of all the my hair stays dry. Relaxed I moisturize the beginning of the week and it stays moisturized.

 

[Honey Bee]

Do I think most people have a legit reason to relax? No

HeChangedMyName, Huh? What does this mean?

 

[ghanagirl23]

I do it because I can loool

well I relaxed at a very young age but then I abused my hair in middle school so when I was 12 my mom is like no more relaxers ! i stayed natural till I was 14...honestly it was a hate/love relationship my hair is so kinky and thick I should have to tie my hair back tight for it to look good and I was getting too many headaches and my hair line was gone !

therefore I went back to relaxers when I was 14 I'm 19 now and I have coming on this board has taught me whether natural or relaxed both need maintance people think when you get a relaxer your off the hook but thats when your hair will begin to suffer

so yeah loveeee relaxers

 

[Flawlis1]

I've been relaxed for 23 years.... I stay relaxed because I prefer my hair to be straight 99.3% of the time.

 

[kupenda]

I'm natural. I was relaxed because I like my hair straight. Curls and kinks are gorgeous and I love mine. But I don't have the space in my life to continue doing what I'm doing forever. My natural hair tangles and doesn't seem to like any of the moisturizers or leave ins I've tried. It eats oils for breakfast and laughs at many conditioners. I like the ease of relaxed hair. And bangs. I like bangs lol. I'm only going to be natural for two more years I suppose. Then I'll relax and by that time my hair will be more than long enough for nice buns etc.
But who knows? Maybe I'll change my mind and stick with this natural thing. However right now, it's just a small detour

 

[Ari8]

I'm VERY tempted to relax. My relaxed hair wasn't great, but at least I didn't have to be bothered with matting, tangling, breakage and lengthy styling sessions. I haven't relaxed mostly because 1) I'm afraid my hair is too weak, and 2) I'm afraid that I'll fail at caring for my relaxed hair same as I've failed to maintain my natural hair. All I want is soft, moisturized, maintainence-free natural hair. I've been at this for 4 years now & I've never gotten close to achieving that. It's just not in the works for me.

 

[Mystic]

What works for your hair obviously might not work for someone else. There are soooooo many variations to natural hair and you might be able to detangle and style yours in 15 minutes while others might take hrs just to detangle. If someone said they relax because natural hair takes too much time, and they do not want to have to wash in sections, that is THEIR experience with the natural stands on THEIR head. Lucky for you, YOUR experience is different. Hence the reason you remain natural.

I have b/c to natural at least 3-4 times since being on this board and I can totally relate to why many relax. I have grown my natural hair out to APL and dealing with it was a chore vs. the ease when it was relaxed. It took hrs to style, detangling was a nightmare even though I lived on Youtube trying to learn the best ways to take care of my hair. It shed way more than when I was relaxed and I just did not enjoy the experience. Fast forward now to today after having a baby; my hair texture changed somewhat. I do not know if it was the hormone but suddenly my natural hair became so much more manageable and easier to handle. It became soft and styled so much easier that there hasn't been a need for me to relax so far. My hairline is so soft and curly when wet and I would hate to have a relaxer ruin the beauty of my natural hair now. It is a little below APL in 19 months and for the first time, I am contented with it because it is no longer a hassle. I am saying all of this to say...., I just wish we could just accept the fact that not because some natural textures look alike, that doesn't mean they behave the same way. If someone says their natural hair is hard to deal with, accept it at that, be happy your experience is different and stop comparing.

Everyone can do what they want with their hair, just chiming in my lil opinion.

I always wonder why people say being natural takes too much time. I don't spend anymore time in my hair now then I did when I was relaxed, besides adding washing my hair with the rest of my body when I shower in the morning. Straightening my natural hair takes as long as it did to straighten my relaxed hair. For some reason when it was relaxed it seemed more course.

If being natural tool that long I would've relaxed by now. I guess it requires patience because it was much harder when it was shorter, but I think all hair is.

Now complicated regimens...I just don't get. Tried it and said its just not that serious. Long as I condition, detangle, and stay on top of my physical health I see no need to do more than that.

And I don't walk around looking crazy either. Curly ponytail or bun, or straight and bun.

Anyways, I don't see a prob w relaxing, ppl like whatever look they want.

Edit: I don't wash in sections either. I hop in the shower, wash ma body, put conditioner in and rinse, leave some in, brush it thru my hair, shake like a puppy and I'm done.

 

[HeChangedMyName]

@HeChangedMyName, Huh? What does this mean?

I mean, like, people go from relaxed to texlax because it is less damaging, or they go natural to avoid chemicals. I've never heard anyone say they were going to relax or continue relaxing because it has no health benefits for the hair. maybe legit wasnt the right word. . .I should have said, I've never heard of anyone with a hair health reason to relax.

 

[ChocolatePie777]

I'm VERY tempted to relax. My relaxed hair wasn't great, but at least I didn't have to be bothered with matting, tangling, breakage and lengthy styling sessions. I haven't relaxed mostly because 1) I'm afraid my hair is too weak, and 2) I'm afraid that I'll fail at caring for my relaxed hair same as I've failed to maintain my natural hair. All I want is soft, moisturized, maintainence-free natural hair. I've been at this for 4 years now & I've never gotten close to achieving that. It's just not in the works for me.

I think youll be disappointed then.....cause unless youre naturally bald no hair is maintanence free

 

[Evolving78]

i relaxed because i wanted to (just because) and because i want my length to show more, without a ton of heat or manipulation. i really wasn't feeling the shrinkage, once my hair started to get longer. i prefer TWA styles on me or locs.

 

[Ari8]

I think youll be disappointed then.....cause unless youre naturally bald no hair is maintanence free

Er, I understand that. What I meant was that considering all the work (and money) I put into my hair, and the lack of positive results, makes my hair difficult to maintain.

 

[UGQueen]

i relax because i cant deal with my thick natural hair. taking 2 hours to wash and Dc then 6 hours to dry then i proceed to style only to wake up the next day looking homeless.
my natural hair (or transitioning) hair was too much of a set back and took wayy to much time
I have three jobs i dont have that kinda time to spend on my hair.

but more importantly i just look better with relaxed hair.. simple

 

[Evolving78]

Er, I understand that. What I meant was that considering all the work (and money) I put into my hair, and the lack of positive results, makes my hair difficult to maintain.

Ari8
what is your hair's porosity, is it dense, course, fine, medium, what is your texture, etc...

this is what is going to determine what is going to work best for your relaxed, or natural.

i had to learn that out for myself.

if you are ready for a change, prepare yourself! find out as much info as you can. don't buy anymore products or try anything until you have educated yourself to feel comfortable. remember this is a learning process.

i found out that i can't do a lot of things that other people do on this board or youtube. oh and products? i had to really find out what ingredients work best for me and what works against me. i am still learning, but now i have staples. now i have some type of reggie that works for the most part. it's not perfect, but it's a work in progress that i am benefiting from.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

What works for your hair obviously might not work for someone else. There are soooooo many variations to natural hair and you might be able to detangle and style yours in 15 minutes while others might take hrs just to detangle. If someone said they relax because natural hair takes too much time, and they do not want to have to wash in sections, that is THEIR experience with the natural stands on THEIR head. Lucky for you, YOUR experience is different. Hence the reason you remain natural.

I have b/c to natural at least 3-4 times since being on this board and I can totally relate to why many relax. I have grown my natural hair out to APL and dealing with it was a chore vs. the ease when it was relaxed. It took hrs to style, detangling was a nightmare even though I lived on Youtube trying to learn the best ways to take care of my hair. It shed way more than when I was relaxed and I just did not enjoy the experience. Fast forward now to today after having a baby; my hair texture changed somewhat. I do not know if it was the hormone but suddenly my natural hair became so much more manageable and easier to handle. It became soft and styled so much easier that there hasn't been a need for me to relax so far. My hairline is so soft and curly when wet and I would hate to have a relaxer ruin the beauty of my natural hair now. It is a little below APL in 19 months and for the first time, I am contented with it because it is no longer a hassle. I am saying all of this to say...., I just wish we could just accept the fact that not because some natural textures look alike, that doesn't mean they behave the same way. If someone says their natural hair is hard to deal with, accept it at that, be happy your experience is different and stop comparing.

Good points.....

Not everyone's hair (natural OR relaxed) is the same, nor does it behave the same...

 

[Ari8]

@Ari8
what is your hair's porosity, is it dense, course, fine, medium, what is your texture, etc...

this is what is going to determine what is going to work best for your relaxed, or natural.

i had to learn that out for myself.

if you are ready for a change, prepare yourself! find out as much info as you can. don't buy anymore products or try anything until you have educated yourself to feel comfortable. remember this is a learning process.

i found out that i can't do a lot of things that other people do on this board or youtube. oh and products? i had to really find out what ingredients work best for me and what works against me. i am still learning, but now i have staples. now i have some type of reggie that works for the most part. it's not perfect, but it's a work in progress that i am benefiting from.

My hair is: porous, dense, spongy and fine.

In a general sense, my hair only responds to natural ingredients... and protein. I like ACV so far also, but it works only for as long as its in my hair. And undiluted.

I'm not sure I'm gonna continue trying to figure this out. I ordered a few products and I'll try those, but I'm exhausted and depressed. Nobody's hair should have to be this difficult.

Thanks for your help.