Where Are You All Meeting Single Men Over 30?

[SurferBabe]

I'm starting to believe that single, quality men over 30 are as rare as UFO sightings. Where they at?

This is my biggest hurdle in dating. I'm social. I go to new and different environments all of the time, usually solo, and talk to strangers.

But it seems like every decent man I come across is rocking a wedding ring or is in a LTR.

Are there some hidden gems I'm missing?

 

[Harina]

I'm starting to believe that single, quality men over 30 are as rare as UFO sightings. Where they at?

This is my biggest hurdle in dating. I'm social. I go to new and different environments all of the time, usually solo, and talk to strangers.

But it seems like every decent man I come across is rocking a wedding ring or is in a LTR.

Are there some hidden gems I'm missing?

Correction: rarer.

 

[SurferBabe]

 

[mochalocks]

I would like to know the answer too.

 

[CurlyMoo]

Well I am looking for men over 40, with no kids. So I just choose to believe the truth is out there somewhere.

 

[RUBY]

They all disappear, many into the sunken place and the rest well I don't know. I think this might be a case for Mulder and Scully.

 

[gn1g]

I haven't been looking but i can suggest 2 or 3 places,

I recently went to the horse track and there was a lot of 30+ men, horse owners, trainers, and gamblers

Early in the mornings on weekends at the grocery store - be sure to go the grocery store in the wealthier neighborhoods

any professional training event, car show, boat show, motorcyclist party like the black out or white out parties they have every summer. ::cough:: liquor store.

Get out an about

 

[Ipanema]

I meet a lot of single 30+ men. They seem to like social clubs, networking events, sports leagues, adventure groups, travel groups, hiking, etc.

 

[PopLife]

I haven't been looking but i can suggest 2 or 3 places,

I recently went to the horse track and there was a lot of 30+ men, horse owners, trainers, and gamblers

Early in the mornings on weekends at the grocery store - be sure to go the grocery store in the wealthier neighborhoods

any professional training event, car show, boat show, motorcyclist party like the black out or white out parties they have every summer. ::cough:: liquor store.

Get out an about

In my single days, I met quite a few men at the grocery store...

 

[danniegirl]

I haven't been looking but i can suggest 2 or 3 places,

I recently went to the horse track and there was a lot of 30+ men, horse owners, trainers, and gamblers

Early in the mornings on weekends at the grocery store - be sure to go the grocery store in the wealthier neighborhoods

any professional training event, car show, boat show, motorcyclist party like the black out or white out parties they have every summer. ::cough:: liquor store.

Get out an about

so all is left out there are gamblers and alcoholics and morning shoppers.

Jesus its hard


Its summer time so get ready to get your summer time BBQ's on

Also car washes every time I go I get some sort of action oh I go to the indoor hand car washes


Also omg I been going rock climbing at this indoor spot and its wall to wall grown men getting there fitness on not many women at all. Oh and I am part of a boxing club lol but they guys in there are all kind of not good looking and a bit rough looking.

 

[CarefreeinChicago]

Well I am looking for men over 40, with no kids. So I just choose to believe the truth is out there somewhere.

I am looking for this as well!!

 

[gn1g]

40+ with NO kids. high standards up in here, how about 40+ with grown kids?

 

[movingforward13]

40+ with NO kids. high standards up in here, how about 40+ with grown kids?

I know a few with no kids- late 30s (38-39) up until 45. They seem to have issues with women though... Overly critical, demand the best from black women, prefer dating non black.... not to mention overly bearing and not attractive.

 

[DarkJoy]

I've met 40s-50s with no kids but they were not black.

I usually get chatted up at cliché old grocery stores. i agree with going to more upper SES markets and shopping areas for better quality men but here the bm really thin out to almost nothing in fancier places so have to be open to others.

 

[SurferBabe]

How in the world are you all meeting guys at the grocery store? I must not be shopping properly.

My regular grocery store is a little on the mid-higher end and now that I think about it, I do see ringless men there-- so I'm assuming they're single. So how are y'all going from picking out the right avocado to exchanging digits?

I might just have to start approaching guys first. I catch them staring but they never approach.

 

[Foxglove]

Professional or fitness geared meetup groups
Professional conferences especially ones that break you up into smallish groups. They always do the corny ice breakers that give you an excuse to talk to each other afterwards

 

[gn1g]

How in the world are you all meeting guys at the grocery store? I must not be shopping properly.

My regular grocery store is a little on the mid-higher end and now that I think about it, I do see ringless men there-- so I'm assuming they're single. So how are y'all going from picking out the right avocado to exchanging digits?

I might just have to start approaching guys first. I catch them staring but they never approach.

Practice small talk with any and everybody. be friendly you would be surprised at how many men would love to talk to you but are afraid of rejection! too nervouse etc.

 

[CurlyMoo]

They all disappear, many into the sunken place and the rest well I don't know. I think this might be a case for Mulder and Scully.

But Mulder and Scully are in a sunken place.
Came back for one more season and haven't heard from them since.
Mulder gets around by Uber now. Damn shame.

 

[CurlyMoo]

In my single days, I met quite a few men at the grocery store...

I mainly shop at Walmart. Those men don't interest me.
I am guessing Kroger is the place for the wealthy class, in my area.

 

[CurliDiva]

Online -but you need to do the picking! Don't let the aggressive freaks set the tone -they will be quick to send out those "baby oh baby, I want to X you" messages.

Stick to your deal breaker requirements (such as no kids or aget range), they're out there!

 

[SurferBabe]

Online -but you need to do the picking! Don't let the aggressive freaks -they will be quick to send out those "baby oh baby, I want to X you" messages.

Stick to your deal breaker requirements (such as no kids or aget range), they are out there!

Bumble has some cuties, with jobs! And I think it is set up on this premise-- the woman initiates conversation.

A lot of this advice is a breath of fresh air. The whole sitting back and waiting for the man to make the first move deal worked for me in my early twenties when guys had nothing to lose, but once you hit a certain age you'll be waiting forever listening to this advice. Most of the married men I know admit that they never did the cold approach. An attractive woman has nothing to lose by initiating the convo.

Good responses ladies!

 

[PopLife]

I mainly shop at Walmart. Those men don't interest me.
I am guessing Kroger is the place for the wealthy class, in my area.

Nooo to Walmart, lol. Out here it would be a Ralphs or Vons in a decent area...Whole Foods and Trader Joe's are good too.

 

[DarkJoy]

oddly imma add gas stations!

and not the toothless stank dudes trying to wash windows for a dollar.

Now that i think about it, its been more than a few flirts and chats while waiting for the tank to fill in good neighborhoods over the years.

just last weekend alone, filling up in an upscale hood, two 40somethings one bm and one wm were giving me the eye. i was too shy. the wm (filling his bmw) was real bold smiling and nodding and stuff... i didnt engage either with a definite come hither so nothing happened. i will next time though.

 

[MsNaturalcurl82]

Yes, I wonder where they are too, I'm in that same boat, now all I need is for someone to play that theme music from the X files...

 

[mensa]

so all is left out there are gamblers and alcoholics and morning shoppers.

Jesus its hard


Its summer time so get ready to get your summer time BBQ's on

Also car washes every time I go I get some sort of action oh I go to the indoor hand car washes


Also omg I been going rock climbing at this indoor spot and its wall to wall grown men buying there fitness on not many women at all. Oh and I am part of a boxing club lol but they guys in there are all kind of not good looking and a bit rough looking.

See, this is why I tell my DH that if he dies before me, I WILL NOT BE GETTING MARRIED AGAIN. The way you all talk, I may not even be able to get a date, lol.

My tolerance level for mess is low and I was not raised to run after a man. And he certainly will not be putting his fingerprints all over my body without putting his last name on OUR marriage certificate first. No, I'm not cooking him regular meals, picking up his cleaning, buying him expensive gifts nor giving him money. (I had a really good friend who did all of these things and more for her men. She's still single and cannot figure out how or why).

 

[gn1g]

Hotel lobby is a good place to meet corporate ballers! o and I've met men at the auctions, house, car and boat auctions. gun range and gun shows.

Also the Masons are always having events and most are professionals policemen, fireman and postman. Try to get their event schedule you are sure to meet a professional man.

Where ever they detail cars, look for the detail shop with nice cars.

 

[GetHappy2014]

Online -but you need to do the picking! Don't let the aggressive freaks set the tone -they will be quick to send out those "baby oh baby, I want to X you" messages.

Stick to your deal breaker requirements (such as no kids or aget range), they're out there!

I second, Online. It's all laid out for you... Their age, children or not (at this age hope for adult children), appearance, profession... Send a flirt ...leave it there then move on to the next.

 

[movingforward13]

Hotel lobby is a good place to meet corporate ballers! o and I've met men at the auctions, house, car and boat auctions. gun range and gun shows.

Also the Masons are always having events and most are professionals policemen, fireman and postman. Try to get their event schedule you are sure to meet a professional man.

Where ever they detail cars, look for the detail shop with nice cars.

Great ideas

 

[CurliDiva]

I'm married, but want to share another nugget of dating advice!

You could make (or encourage) the initial contact but please DON'T do any the heavy-lifting relationship-wise:

• You do not "ask" for his number!
• You do not ask him out!
  
• You're not planning (or worst PAY for ) dates!
• Offering up the "goods"
• Or accept inappropriate or disrespectful behavior!

Even a shy or busy guy will MAN UP, if he is truly interested in you, so let his actions speak for his intentions.

In fact, don't event consider it a "relationship" until he has proven himself worthy and YOU decide you truly want him in your life.

Also, try to move deeper than the "nice car" or "nice clothes" criteria. He could drive a nice car but be in debt or still living in his momma's basement; or he may look good but trifling with women.

 

[**SaSSy**]

How in the world are you all meeting guys at the grocery store? I must not be shopping properly.

My regular grocery store is a little on the mid-higher end and now that I think about it, I do see ringless men there-- so I'm assuming they're single. So how are y'all going from picking out the right avocado to exchanging digits?

I might just have to start approaching guys first. I catch them staring but they never approach.

I was told a looooooooooong time ago, that if a man is just staring and doesn't approach you, then he's just not interested enough or has a wife/gf. You can risk by staring back or just leave it alone.

You do better going to a event where you are made to be social if you want to back door your way to a man approaching you.

I'm married, but want to share another nugget of dating advice!

You could make (or encourage) the initial contact but please DON'T do any the heavy-lifting relationship-wise:

• You do not "ask" for his number!
• You do not ask him out!
  
• You're not planning (or worst PAY for ) dates!
• Offering up the "goods"
• Or accept inappropriate or disrespectful behavior!

Even a shy or busy guy will MAN UP, if he is truly interested in you, so let his actions speak for his intentions.

In fact, don't event consider it a "relationship" until he has proven himself worthy and YOU decide you truly want him in your life.

Also, try to move deeper than the "nice car" or "nice clothes" criteria. He could drive a nice car but be in debt or still living in his momma's basement; or he may look good but trifling with women.

ITA on this post. You have to look like you got better things to do when you are out and about and only then would a man approach you. I notice I get more attention from people in general when I'm minding my own business (not on my phone) and just look like I'm busy getting in and out my car, walking the streets, etc.