what do you think about this?

[nychaelasymone]

I don't know where I think these things up but.......how do you feel about
being in a relationship where the man is telling you that when you don't meet his needs (i.e, he asks you to do something for him and you forget which makes him think you don't have time for him or that you don't care about him like you say you do) and he punishes you by not giving you what you need (i.e emotional support, hugs, kisses, holding the door for you)?

If you do your best in the relationship to give this man what he needs but you fail at times to meet his needs for whatever reason, does it give him the right to withold chivalry (opening doors, kisses, hugs, etc)?

 

[stinastina]

No. That is just petty tit for tat behavior. If he told me I didn't meet his needs, then I would ask him what is he doing with me if I am so awful ? It sounds like he enjoys punishing you and withholding affection. Petty.

 

[dlewis]

Lots of people are like that. If you don't do for me, I won't do for you. I couldn't be in a relationship like that.

 

[**SaSSy**]

Yuck almost every immature man that I know is like that, a man with good ol' fashion values wouldn't even say/do anything like that!

 

[nychaelasymone]

DISCLAIMER....THIS QUESTION WAS JUST FOR DISCUSSION....NOTHING PERSONAL

I would have to agree with all of you. It is petty behavior and honestly you could never satisfy a person like this.

 

[donna894]

DISCLAIMER....THIS QUESTION WAS JUST FOR DISCUSSION....NOTHING PERSONAL

I would have to agree with all of you. It is petty behavior and honestly you could never satisfy a person like this.

You summed it up. BTW -- people like this are who they are. You can't change them. Only thing you can do is decide if this is something you are willing to put up with.

 

[nychaelasymone]

You summed it up. BTW -- people like this are who they are. You can't change them. Only thing you can do is decide if this is something you are willing to put up with.

good point and there are people who do put up with this.

 

[TLC1020]

Wow, so everytime you don't do something is he going to punish you?
This guy does my girlfriend like this quite often, if she don't do something, he sock it to her really bad by ignoring her calls,texts and cut down all communication until he's ready to communicate again and she be going through a thing too .

 

[nychaelasymone]

Wow, so everytime you don't do something is he going to punish you?
This guy does my girlfriend like this quite often, if she don't do something, he sock it to her really bad by ignoring her calls,texts and cut down all communication until he's ready to communicate again and she be going through a thing too .

 

[LunadeMiel]

Sounds like a boy to me...

 

[ThickHair]

Very childish and immature. Must have had a very passive aggressive homelife with his parents. I think that behavior is taught and I think we are all born wanting to please.

 

[glamazon386]

Sounds like he needs to grow up....

 

[Bunny77]

I dealt with this very recently... not the exact same scenario, but when I would bring up something that made me angry, he told me he was cutting me off for an undisclosed period of time because he had too much pressure in his life right now and didn't need more.

Now this wasn't my "man," but someone I was dating. At first (and because of bad advice), I accepted this, thinking I was being too pushy and acting like a girlfriend when I was not.

But the NEXT time he did that to me and said he was going to put me on hold, I said, "Well, how about we be on hold for good. Don't ever contact me again."


And that was that. (BTW, this man was OLD too!)

It's seriously a control tactic, and it's horrible. I understand if a man is upset and needs a SHORT cooling off period, but to deliberately deny you attention and affection? Oh hell nah...