what do YOU consider cheating?

[lea86111]

i was having a convo with some friends a few days back and we all disagreed with what we consider cheating to be. The convo originated from us talking about why did i get married 2, where tyler perr's wife has a crush on a coworker and gets all dressed up for work and is thinking about the coworker while sexing tyler...i would be jealous and a little sad but to me that is not cheating...
WHERE DO YOU DRAW THE LINE?

 

[Mai Tai]

Anything that's done behind my back, in secret, or without my knowledge is cheating to me. My philosophy is that if your intentions are honorable, then I would know about it.

 

[TayMac]

Totally agree with Mai Tai...if you have to hide it from me, I consider it as cheating and suspect.

And yes..in the case of that movie, she was emotionally cheating on him and would llikely have lead to full intimacy IRL (I think).

 

[kismettt]

anything you wouldn't do in front of me. and having an intimate, emotional connection that rivals or threatens ours.

 

[fluffylocks]

Lusting after other people.

 

[lea86111]

wow lusting after others is cheating? C'mon! Everybody's a cheater then...shoo i just went to c takers and i was LUSTING a whole lot, so if i had a man that would be considered cheating? Or if i had a really fine man @ work and thought he was the finest thing since (insert whoever's name here) i would be cheating? Wow y'all go hard!

 

[NYAmicas]

What everyone else said in addition to anything you wouldnt feel bold enough to do in front of your SO.

 

[yardyspice]

Cheating is when the train enters the tunnel. Everything else is planning to cheat. I think when we make simple lapses in judgment into something bigger we push the train into the tunnel. For example, with Tyler Perry's wife, my friend and I disagreed about whether he should divorce her. I felt that she hadn't done anything -- yet. She was planning to and needed to get checked but not divorced IMO.

 

[fluffylocks]

wow lusting after others is cheating? C'mon! Everybody's a cheater then...shoo i just went to c takers and i was LUSTING a whole lot, so if i had a man that would be considered cheating? Or if i had a really fine man @ work and thought he was the finest thing since (insert whoever's name here) i would be cheating? Wow y'all go hard!

LOL

I was trying to think of the smallest thing a person could do that would count as cheating to me.

If you have a man, and your like d*m, my coworker is fine...if I was single I would want to talk to him ect- I dont think thats lusting or cheating

But if you have a man, and your thinking about your fine coworker "he looks like he has a big...", thinking about him doing this or that to you-
And you dont try to avoid him....your looking at him whenever you can, talking to him all the time...Just anxious. Thats lusting and cheating to me...because if you find out hes intrested in you, then youll probally do something with him (even though i might be bias because I think a man will cheat from lusting before a women will because of how I think, dont know about other women)

Even though I dont think you will find out if your SO is lusting after people, and dont think anyone would break up over it...I just think its wrong, and the first step to cheating, and that a person should try to avoid those situations.

 

[Mai Tai]

My mindset is that cheating is less about the action, and more about the deception. This is why there is a such thing as emotional cheating. If you have to HIDE your phone conversations, text messages e-mails, outings, etc. then I couldn't care less if the train enters the tunnel. In my mind you cheated because you had to lie to me.

 

[Daeuiel]

Kissing on the mouth or any kind of sexual activity. Flirting is okay, I'm not gonna kick the door down if I see a woman with her hand on his arm while I'm peeking in the window from behind the bushes , but if he puts his lips on hers I'm going home to pack and he can go ahead and see what it's like with her because I'm out.

 

[~Sparklingflame~]

Emotionally attaching yourself INTENTIONALLY to another woman ( private dinner, intense phone convo, emails, texts, ect)even w/o sexual contact is cheating to me. Just like what ole girl did on Why Did I get Married Too?

So...you know hat the actual act is considered.

 

[Moopeh]

My mindset is that cheating is less about the action, and more about the deception. This is why there is a such thing as emotional cheating. If you have to HIDE your phone conversations, text messages e-mails, outings, etc. then I couldn't care less if the train enters the tunnel. In my mind you cheated because you had to lie to me.

Agreed. *nod*

 

[teeyah2005]

I consider cheating to be anything that would hurt and/or infuriate me if the shoe were on the other foot. Fortunately for hubby (and for me ), innocent flirtation does not fall into that category. Anything further than that and you're treading into dangerous territory. JMO

 

[lea86111]

while I'm peeking in the window from behind the bushes

 

[lea86111]

well to me cheating is any physical contact done with the intent of sexual gratification. Anything prior to that, like having phone convos, flirtatious texts, dinners and such done with the intent of leading up to above mentioned physical contact is not cheating per se (technically) but to me then you might as well have cheated cause the only reason you didn't cheat was cause i caught you.

also, as far as WDIGM2 i'm a little rusty and don't remember whether tyler perry's wife was going on dinners, having phone convos with him etc; if so then yeah she was gonna cheat and only got stopped cause her husband found out, now, if she wasn't doing any of the mentioned and all she did was dress a little better and flirt then no it's not really cheating and doesn't necessarily mean she intended to either...it's a blurry line.

 

[ladysaraii]

My mindset is that cheating is less about the action, and more about the deception. This is why there is a such thing as emotional cheating. If you have to HIDE your phone conversations, text messages e-mails, outings, etc. then I couldn't care less if the train enters the tunnel. In my mind you cheated because you had to lie to me.

Kissing on the mouth or any kind of sexual activity. Flirting is okay, I'm not gonna kick the door down if I see a woman with her hand on his arm while I'm peeking in the window from behind the bushes , but if he puts his lips on hers I'm going home to pack and he can go ahead and see what it's like with her because I'm out.

I haven't seen Why did i get Married Too, but I agree with both of these statements.