We are killing our hair....one weave at a time

[WhipEffectz1]

I also think that women need to stop letting other people do their weaves. That way you make sure that your thread is straight and maintain better health of the hair. Besides, these beauticians are getting a little out of hand with these weave prices. $200 and up. No bruh, I'll do it myself. Weave is such serious business that the prices to get one hasn't dramatically dropped due to the economy. No thanks. Pay a light bill or insurance with that. Times too hard to.....

 

[SiobhanM]

Not really though. I have visted that site LHF and white women there do pretty much the same things that we do... ill say the hair care practices are new for black women but I won't say our hair is harder to deal with

Our hair is HARDER to maintain and manage. Just head over to natural hair haven dot com ( dont know if i can post links) and she breaks it down. I MEAN THE ACTUAL SCIENCE BEHIND IT!

The Caucasian women over at the other site are into hair care just like us that doesnt mean that their hair is just as hard to maintain as ours its just that they practice healthy hair techniques for optimal results.

 

[SiobhanM]

And at the end of the day I just think it just has to do with PROPER HAIR CARE if your are wearing a weave. Whether or not your have a bad relaxer or un healthy natural hair. It doesnt matter. As long as you can take care of your hair right.

Take a look at reniece dot com if you do not believe that weaves can help you as a protective style while maintaining proper hair care
I think a lot of these anti - weave threads are being started by people that havent had good experience with weaves. Im not sure though.

 

[Vashti]

I know some women who only care about the "health" of their weave but don't give a flying fig about their own natural hair underneath their weave. They can wash and deep condition their weave hair but what happen to their own hair. Then when the weave is removed the hair is all broken off which a weave is put back on. Its a repeating cycle.

Washing and deep conditioning a weave? Wow.erplexed

Actually I shouldn't be surprised because I know someone who does this. Her own hair has never seen
the light of day.

 

[HappilyLiberal]

Where are all these weave posts coming from? Did something happen? This is the third one I've seen in the past day!

Really! I mean seriously? Let people come to their own journeys when they are wearing hair. Worry about your own head.

I agree.

We just got over (I think) the Natural vs. Relaxed Wars... I hope we are not about to begin the Weave vs. Your Own Hair Wars?!

 

[Harina]

Lol at all the people saying natural black hair is not more difficult. Stop playing though... for real. Difficult does not have to be a bad thing. If it makes anyone feel better, just say "requires more care."

 

[pureebony]

Ok well i do believe that if we as black people were more unified we would be leading the haircare industry, because to be quite frank there is no reason why we shouldn't we pump so much money into that industry!

it just goes back to the plain old fact that when it comes to us as people we have more conflict between our racial group than i think any other race.

when i go into a hair shop over here its dominated by asian people, who obviously have tapped into the market and are making serious money out of it.

weaves, wigs braids relaxers etc at the end of the day yes many black women do one or the other because im sorry everyone needs to be quite honest with themselves 4a/b hair is not on the tv commercials for haircare and you don't get told moisture protein balance is the one major way to maintain afro hair when you go to a store to buy hair products.

its only now that there has been proper info regarding 4a/b hair to feed us with the knowledge that we don't have bad hair, but it does not fit into the care pattern of wash every day with shampoo and leave the house- because i know if i did that i would end up with a tangled mess, i don't have hair strands that separate!?! they are best friends and with any given opportunity they knot and have a fiesta up in my head!! lol

but truth be told i think we just need to realize that its our issue to educate other sistahs one at a time, i personally love changing my hair up in different styles and if my hair cant do it then i put in a weave!

i work in the fashion industry and whenever they see my hair done in a natural bun, twist, or weave with bags etc they love it! they are always going on about how creative black women seem to be with their hair!

so i take pride in it, if the majority have battered hair due to lack of knowledge then like i did with the females in my family i will educate them, simple its not hard and its quite fun too!

at the end of the day if your hair is healthy then your free to do what you want with it.... i don't see women of other races getting caught up in how many of them use fake tan and color their hair?!!!? so why are we...lets move on there are more pressing social issues to deal with then who has tracks or not!!??!

anywhoo!!

 

[GraciousMystique]

^^Agree with above poster. Knowledge is the key in preventing damage to our hair. But I'm perplexed. How many threads I've read here where the poster offered knowledge about haircare to a friend or family and they rejected the advice saying "it's too much work" or "they rather stick to traditional haircare methods" or continued to belief "that black women can't grow long hair". My friend whom I showed this site to said you guys were either mixed with something or wearing weaves.

Ignorance is bliss. Some black women out there prefer to not care for their hair, follow false traditional haircare methods, aren't willing to put in the time and so therefore rely on weaves.

 

[Beverly Ann Properties]

In the September 2010 edition of O, The Oprah Magazine, page 218 of the Hire Power article it stated that the hairstylist "bonded with temporary glue extensions through the back of the of the subject's short cut..." I was startled about the glue... Thank God, I am more healthy hair care conscious of what is good and what is not healthy for hair. A sew in would have been a better choice than any glue, temporary or not. This site has taught me a lot that others need to learn IF they care about the health of their hair opposed to the style of their hair.

 

[Mahalialee4]

my personal opinion: re: their making money off our expensive addictive need for their endless supply of weaves, wigs, and phoney ponies. Well ok. I will stick to the weaves. I have a certain feeling about the endless suppliers and pushers of weaves.....Asians, Indians etc.

They capitalize on:

Our shame
Our ignorance
Our shame
Our covetousness to have hair like THEM
Our lack of self esteem and value for what we have and are
Our LAZINESS and not wanting 'to be bothered' with our hair. Imagine if we felt that way about bathing our bodies!!!
Our self delusion: pretending that we and those around us are seeing our hair. (yes, delusional)
Our shame
Our willingness to pay our last dime for high priced weaves that we really usually cannot afford
Our willingness to shamelessly sell ourselves out and *whore after their products. (*the sad thing is WE PAY THEM!)

Just my opinion

And we feed into their stereotypes about us as 'foolish covetous ashamed women' and we wonder why they treat us with disrespect in their stores!!!! Do you ever see those people coming into ANY STORE black people have and disrespecting themselves, DROOLING over our products? Enough said.

 

[sikora]

We just got over (I think) the Natural vs. Relaxed Wars... I hope we are not about to begin the Weave vs. Your Own Hair Wars?!

I'm beginning to think "weave wearers" are the new "ladies who continue to relax."

 

[cocoaluv]

my personal opinion: re: their making money off our expensive addictive need for their endless supply of weaves, wigs, and phoney ponies. Well ok. I will stick to the weaves. I have a certain feeling about the endless suppliers and pushers of weaves.....Asians, Indians etc.

They capitalize on:

Our shame
Our ignorance
Our shame
Our covetousness to have hair like THEM
Our lack of self esteem and value for what we have and are
Our LAZINESS and not wanting 'to be bothered' with our hair. Imagine if we felt that way about bathing our bodies!!!
Our self delusion: pretending that we and those around us are seeing our hair. (yes, delusional)
Our shame
Our willingness to pay our last dime for high priced weaves that we really usually cannot afford
Our willingness to shamelessly sell ourselves out and *whore after their products. (*the sad thing is WE PAY THEM!)

Just my opinion

And we feed into their stereotypes about us as 'foolish covetous ashamed women' and we wonder why they treat us with disrespect in their stores!!!! Do you ever see those people coming into ANY STORE black people have and disrespecting themselves, DROOLING over our products? Enough said.

AMEN!!! I totally agree with all that you wrote. My mother is always trying to get me to go into one of these stores with her to buy her hair dyes and such but I refuse. As long as they treat us like crap I will not be spending ONE red cent in these stores.

 

[jennboo]

Actually, we are killing our hair...one relaxer at a time.

But i hear you with the weaves, those are wack too.

 

[Hairsofab]

In my opinion its not really the weaves themselves. But it is the constant braiding, the tight braiding. The constant pulling at your hair, then coupled with the weight of additional hair hanging from it causes individual hairs to be plucked out. When you combine that with relaxing which already weakens the hair it can turn to a disaster. Especially when people wear weaves or braid their hair tightly over decades.

 

[dynamic1]

I agree weave is killing a lot of women's hair. Flip on a reality show and you will see some jacked up hair with extensions on women of all races.

Yes, white women wear weave...but why is it so tough to admit that this is a completely different ball of wax when compared to black women? They are not running out in record numbers to get the latest afro kinky texture. Does a white woman wearing a weave validate weave/wig usage by black women?

Yes, our hair is more difficult to manage...we are trying to manage it to fit a certain aesthetic. If we were the dominant culture and highly textured hair was the pinnacle...would, it be considered "hard to manage?” I doubt it.

To the “it’s just hair” brigade…if it was just hair…people would not have an issue wearing their own...even it was damaged, long, short, kinky, relaxed, etc.

If people wear weaves/wigs and they like it, then I love it...but it is what it is. Let me leave it at that so I don’t ruffle any cuticles.

 

[SiobhanM]

Actually, we are killing our hair...one relaxer at a time.

But i hear you with the weaves, those are wack too.

THANK YOU!
Why is no one raising this issue? I see so many raggedy hair relaxer wearers. I was once one too.
A lot of ladies dont know anything about proper hair care whether it be the hair under their weave or relaxed hair.

So unless you know proper hair care then guess what? We are killing OUR HAIR ONE WEAVE AND CREAMY CRACK SHOT AT A TIME! Please dont single out because for as many sisters as you see with a weave there is another sister with a jacked up relaxer.
Before I got on LHCF i BARELY saw women with relaxer that had BSL, APL, or WL hair. The difference is you know proper hair care. Before joining BHM I thought every woman with a weave did not know anything about how to handle the hair under the weave. I was surprised at how much information you women have.

KNOWLEDGE IS POWER! PROPER HAIR CARE POINT BLANK PERIOD WHETHER WEAVED UP OR RELAXED UP IS POWER!

 

[GeauXavi]

Ok... I need to say this.

When people post rants like this on the board... it's like preaching to the choir. (no offense lizzi...my twitter buddy)

Look at it this way...we are all on THIS board because our interest aka HOBBY is to take care of our hair and grow it long. Because this is our hobby...we learn a lot about the subject and cultivate our hair. We are very knowledgeable in a subject that the majority is not.

If taking care of your car was a hobby...weekly washes, tints, rims, fly interior...would you be upset because others didn't understand the importance of taking care of their cars?

I know that because hair is on our bodies, it seems like to most that it is a reflection of self-esteem, identification, and the like. To us, having beautiful hair is important. Truth of the matter is...to some, growing healthy, long hair is not a priority. That doesn't make them a bad person...Just one with jacked-up hair.

 

[Tiye]

And also white people use them too. But you don't see anyone talking about that. Or the fact that they start as tweens dying their hair, and flat ironing it till it's brittle as straw. And there's plenty with weaves too. They just don't talk about it. ER society just doesn't talk about it.

You should use google and check out discussion forums for white women weave enthusiasts. You'll learn a thing or two. They have their own perspective and some of their techniques are different but they are just as into it as black women. And some of them lurk on bhm which makes sense - you learn by looking at a variety of sources not by restricting yourself to one source.

Lol at all the people saying natural black hair is not more difficult. Stop playing though... for real. Difficult does not have to be a bad thing. If it makes anyone feel better, just say "requires more care."

I don't care if anyone calls it difficult. I have noticed however that people who complain about difficult hair are also pretty set in their ways and routinely ignore tips that would help them. I'm not talking about ordering expensive products or time consuming techniques - I'm talking low or no cost simple things that will help. I don't believe our hair is more difficult coz I know people of all kinds of races/ethnicities and I've seen white people struggle with their hair too. Hair management is a skill that anyone can learn if they're open minded to it.

We just got over (I think) the Natural vs. Relaxed Wars... I hope we are not about to begin the Weave vs. Your Own Hair Wars?!

I think it just began - out of the blue (like all wars). Well actually I have my theory about why it began and it's not what you think - hint it prolly has little to do with the plastic hair that people are bashing. I guess this will be a long thread and a few years from now if lhcf is still around it will be interesting reading for someone.

 

[~Sparklingflame~]

And ya'll thought natural vs relaxed was dead?



We can just add one to the list : Weaves wearers vs Non weave wearers

 

[MsLizziA]

DDDDAAAMMNN! This thread wen COMPLETELY to the left! Geez this had nothing to do with weave weares vs non weave wears. I WEAR WEAVES! The subject line was just to get attention but if some of y'all actually read the OP, i was simply saying that the very thing we (LHCF) use to grow our hair out, is the very thing that a lot of women use and its taking their hair our cuz they don't care for the hair under it even though they wear weaves 24/7...... THAS ALL I WAS SAYIN!

Damn y'all took this n ran a marathin with it

 

[LittleLuxe]

Ok... I need to say this.

When people post rants like this on the board... it's like preaching to the choir. (no offense lizzi...my twitter buddy)

Look at it this way...we are all on THIS board because our interest aka HOBBY is to take care of our hair and grow it long. Because this is our hobby...we learn a lot about the subject and cultivate our hair. We are very knowledgeable in a subject that the majority is not.

If taking care of your car was a hobby...weekly washes, tints, rims, fly interior...would you be upset because others didn't understand the importance of taking care of their cars?

I know that because hair is on our bodies, it seems like to most that it is a reflection of self-esteem, identification, and the like. To us, having beautiful hair is important. Truth of the matter is...to some, growing healthy, long hair is not a priority. That doesn't make them a bad person...Just one with jacked-up hair.

Girl, preach.

Sorry but hair isn't always the window into the soul.

Lack of mis-information, confusion, doubt, an uncaring industry that is often perpetrated by blacks (cause let's not pretend it's just the Asians or the Indians doing us wrong; sometimes we see the enemy...and it is us.) all day everyday I will agree with that but some of this other stuff....nada.

I think when you know something you can look at your own environment and realize there is a stark absence of information. I know I can. I don't really see ANYONE trying to really sit down and explain how black women's hair can be cared for and blossom from health and consistent attention. Do you ever hear the words protein/moisture balance on those talk shows run by some of the most famous black women? So of course weaves (and anything else) that appears to be easier and less complicated will become popular and some women will abuse that.

To the poster who asked why some people refuse advice even when offered I can't answer for every situation, some people are stubborn, lazy, not really motivated, deeply set in their ways. On the other hand you could liken it to trying to diet. You see your gorgeous friend slim down and go "Hey you know I see a big improvement in you, I'd really like to try this" before you know it she's writing down a dozen products, and processes, telling you what to do when and how on a schedule, saying that you have to 'feel' what you need and perform 'tests'. Lol, I would surely walk away confused like "Apparently this is not for me, who has the time to do all that?"

That's why I think when ladies hair truly takes off THEN SOMETIMES the people who didn't believe them before take a breath and say 'well whatever she's doing it's paying off so am I willing to work for it?'. I've already inspired my friend to take better care of her hair and I'm happy to do so without the lists or confusing names...yet (tried to explain the purpose of chelation, she looked so adorably lost, lol).

 

[~Sparklingflame~]

Girl, preach.

Sorry but hair isn't always the window into the soul. [eyes]

I swear Im using this the next time someone wants to tye in your hair as the cause of your self esteem issues and is the sole reason for your racial identity issues ect.

I really hate that.. I truly do.

 

[FebeeSigns]

I agree with you. When I hear women on here talking about weaves to protect their hair I'm sorta like "Huh? Why?" You can use hats, bandanas and even certain hairstyles with your own hair, to protect your hair. I'm just one of those people who hate hiding my hair from the world. That's not my hair, it's fake hair and I love the real. Different strokes for different folks.

 

[EllePixie]

I agree with you. When I hear women on here talking about weaves to protect their hair I'm sorta like "Huh? Why?" You can use hats, bandanas and even certain hairstyles with your own hair, to protect your hair. I'm just one of those people who hate hiding my hair from the world. That's not my hair, it's fake hair and I love the real. Different strokes for different folks.

Like someone said earlier, weaves and wigs are quick and easy! Doing hairstyles can take a long time - not all of them, but I know the ONE time I did twists they took me four hours!!! No thank you! I would much rather spend 20 minutes braiding my hair then throw a wig on. Also, unless your hat has a silk/satin lining or your scarf is silk, you can actually break your hair off while wearing them. Another reason I like my wig - because I have no problem wearing my cute hats with them that I will not put on my natural hair! I am not an avid wig wearer, and I have never worn a weave, but they are so easy I feel like I'm cheating, and I'm not mad at it. Like I said in the other thread, I think it becomes an issue when you are ashamed to wear your own hair out of the house. Personally, I wear wigs that make it OBVIOUS that it isn't my real hair - like a bone straight waist length wig - because I'm not trying to fool anybody and it's just a cute style to me (like Lady Gaga lol) - and if anyone tried to act like I was ashamed of my hair I would gladly show them my head FULL of hair that I wear out often.

 

[Kash]

I agree with you. When I hear women on here talking about weaves to protect their hair I'm sorta like "Huh? Why?" You can use hats, bandanas and even certain hairstyles with your own hair, to protect your hair. I'm just one of those people who hate hiding my hair from the world. That's not my hair, it's fake hair and I love the real. Different strokes for different folks.

and i agree with you! i give *side eye* to folks on hair forums preaching that lame a$$ excuse that they gotta get a weave as a protective style so their real hair can grow. It doesn't take a silky hair weave for you to grow longer hair!
... you hiding and disguising your hair just like Laquita on the streets. because you ashamed of what grows out of your scalp.

 

[Kash]

I agree weave is killing a lot of women's hair. Flip on a reality show and you will see some jacked up hair with extensions on women of all races.

Yes, white women wear weave...but why is it so tough to admit that this is a completely different ball of wax when compared to black women? They are not running out in record numbers to get the latest afro kinky texture. Does a white woman wearing a weave validate weave/wig usage by black women?
Yes, our hair is more difficult to manage...we are trying to manage it to fit a certain aesthetic. If we were the dominant culture and highly textured hair was the pinnacle...would, it be considered "hard to manage?” I doubt it.

To the “it’s just hair” brigade…if it was just hair…people would not have an issue wearing their own...even it was damaged, long, short, kinky, relaxed, etc.

If people wear weaves/wigs and they like it, then I love it...but it is what it is. Let me leave it at that so I don’t ruffle any cuticles.

need to be reposted.

 

[~Sparklingflame~]

I dont care what any other race of woman does with her hair. My concern is what Im doing with mine.

erplexed

 

[EllePixie]

At the end of the day it's just hair! I cannot stand that people will look at what another race does and interpret it as a simple cosmetic/beauty reason (like white women and weaves, or white women straightening their hair because YES they do it too - I definitely have known white girls with relaxers. Asian girls too.), then turn around and look at black women and get on their soapbox about self hate and low self esteem. Speak for your dang self, stop trying to speak for an entire group of people. Frankly, it's disgusting and insulting.

 

[~Sparklingflame~]

At the end of the day it's just hair! I cannot stand that people will look at what another race does and interpret it as a simple cosmetic/beauty reason (like white women and weaves, or white women straightening their hair because YES they do it too - I definitely have known white girls with relaxers. Asian girls too.), then turn around and look at black women and get on their soapbox about self hate and low self esteem. Speak for your dang self, stop trying to speak for an entire group of people. Frankly, it's disgusting and insulting.

I just wanted to quote for emphasis cuz a thank you click wasnt enough.

 

[$inna-$pice]

The reality is weaves are a quick and easy solution provided by an industry that isn't working hard to actually care for black hair. Sure, there are some companies and people but the reality is it's a jungle out there.

All we have are shelves and shelves of products with confusing names (sheen, hairdress, conditioning wax) it can be completely overwhelming and bewildering. Except unlike going to a specialty store (Sephora, Ulta) where someone can carefully go through your needs and offer advice you have hairstylists lying about what you need and how much you as a consumer can do on your own, products laced with terrible ingredients, and very little information. Pick up a black hair magazine and they can tell you 360 ways to wrap a curling iron around your precious strands but won't say boo about styling in healthier ways or doing special things to care for your hair.

The world doesn't expect much from black hair and for women still caught up in the system of bad hair care products, misinformation, and lousy stylists I think weaves become a safe haven so they can look good.

Just like I think some women pile on makeup because they don't know how to care for their skin but still want to look pretty and appear flawless, some black women use weaves so they can have longer hair and look attractive.

You're absolutely right about all this. Especially the part about the black hair magazines...I just started noticing this recently when I started paying more attention to hair care. There is so much emphasis on heat styling and how to flat iron your hair perfectly, how to use the curling iron, heat this and heat that. Nobody ever mentions acheiving for example, a wavy style with a braidout or bantu knots, but they will be the first ones to push using a crimping iron. Not to mention some of the horrible advice given by some of these so-called "stylists" in the articles telling you to relax every 4-6 weeks! It makes me cringe when I see advice given like this because I think about all the young girls who may be picking up this magazine interested in learning how to care for their own hair and all they're bombarded with is constant heat and overprocessing.

It's really sad that a lot of our community is so misinformed. But then there is the other half that really could care less about hair care and are more interested in a style at the expense of their own hair, slapping a weave on and forgetting what it's attached to. Not a good thing..