**The truth ABOUT black women and their hair!**

[lexi84]

I do not like the term "Nappy/Natural Nazi". Why? Due to the historical significance of Nazism I do not think the term should be used lightly. I do not think that the relaxed/natural debate is so serious that it is on par with Nazism. I feel the same way about the word "lynch" being used in casual conversation. The historical significance is acute and I don't think the word should be played with under any circumstances.

Yes, I think all women should step away from the relaxers. And, yes I believe that the continued use of relaxers only supports the prevailing idea that natural hair is ugly and unacceptable. But, just by saying that I'm considered a "Nappy Nazi" and I think that characterization is unfair and uncalled for. I have never entertained the idea of killing someone because of their hair choices so to lump me in with a group of people who encouraged, supported, and carried out the murders of millions of people is just wrong.

I totally agree with that. After more than 10 years of being relaxed, I'm finally beginning to see the light. I think natural hair is so much more elegant and beautiful. There's something about it thats so refreshing.

I asked my brother what he thinks about women that dont relax and he said he admires their courage and knows that it takes a certain kind of woman to go against the grain.

 

[TCatt86]

you know something funny, that's one of my biggest pet peeves...it really bothers me. the only thing that bothers me more is the phrase "go natural"...as someone once said: you don't go natural, you stay natural and choose not to go get a relaxer.

This is me!!! My mom says that all the time and I have to correct her.

 

[Dak]

Interesting video. But I think they're read way too much into black women and hair. It's not like wearing wigs is a new thing, ancient Egyptians wore wigs and the Assyrians, Phoenicians, Greeks, and Romans also used artificial hairpieces at times. Wigs were a sign of status in the 1700's, both men and women used wigs.

Fact is, people (AKA human beings) like hair! Look at the white people that don dreadlocks, white people that wear extensions, perm/straighten. Curly hair takes some management time, look at our African sisters, traditionally hair was wore short or shaved, adorning beautiful scarves or elaborate braids. We like to do stuff to our hair! It makes us look good!

 

[Studio_gal]

If you are all worried about people stealing your pictures - watermark them. It's quite easy to do and there are some free online downloads you can use to do it.

 

[Reinventing21]

I do not like the term "Nappy/Natural Nazi". Why? Due to the historical significance of Nazism I do not think the term should be used lightly. I do not think that the relaxed/natural debate is so serious that it is on par with Nazism. I feel the same way about the word "lynch" being used in casual conversation. The historical significance is acute and I don't think the word should be played with under any circumstances.

Yes, I think all women should step away from the relaxers. And, yes I believe that the continued use of relaxers only supports the prevailing idea that natural hair is ugly and unacceptable. But, just by saying that I'm considered a "Nappy Nazi" and I think that characterization is unfair and uncalled for. I have never entertained the idea of killing someone because of their hair choices so to lump me in with a group of people who encouraged, supported, and carried out the murders of millions of people is just wrong.

[/QUOTE]

Regarding the bolded above: I feel that the problem is not relaxers, but the way people generally think about nappy hair. I get that many feel that wearing relaxers promotes the idea of shame in one's natural hair, but really that supposed shame is only the result of the bigger problem: It's all about the negativity associated with type 4 hair as in bad hair, pelo muy malo. The hair itself, relaxed or not relaxed. Having relaxed hair does not give you the 'good hair' pass in society. It just gives you 'bad' hair that has been straightened. This concept of bad hair period is what needs to change & could change as society begins to become more aware of healthy (keyword) type 4 hair whether relaxed, fully natural (especially natural) or somewhere in between.

I truly believe that if everyone (all races) in the whole world had always had type 4 hair, someone still would have invented the straightening comb, relaxers, curls etc. Why? People like to experiment, be different, see something new, play, manipulate hair & styles. There would still be people with long hair fetishes, and those love short & sexy styles. Some people would like wearing their hair tighter coils, and others with looser coils. Some would like it straight, others would like braidouts. Diversity is a beautiful thing.

That is why I think there should be more focus on healthy hair of all types, straightened with relaxers or not. Think about it, even 100% naturals straighten their hair with heat every now & then, not cuz they believe straight is better, but it is something different to do. Relaxed heads are the opposite & sometimes manipulate their hair to mimic natural hair. Each can wear hair as they want the majority of the time, & when bored, change the hair.

The anger & frustration in the naturals vs relaxed argument really needs to diverted into more positive energy aimed toward changing the mentality that type 4 hair is bad & showing the world how healthy, versatile, & lovely type 4 hair can be NO MATTER HOW THE PERSON WANTS TO WEAR IT IN THAT MOMENT.

 

[TaurusAngel]

Interesting video. But I think they're read way too much into black women and hair. It's not like wearing wigs is a new thing, ancient Egyptians wore wigs and the Assyrians, Phoenicians, Greeks, and Romans also used artificial hairpieces at times. Wigs were a sign of status in the 1700's, both men and women used wigs.

Fact is, people (AKA human beings) like hair! Look at the white people that don dreadlocks, white people that wear extensions, perm/straighten. Curly hair takes some management time, look at our African sisters, traditionally hair was wore short or shaved, adorning beautiful scarves or elaborate braids. We like to do stuff to our hair! It makes us look good!

Exactly. I really get tired of people thinking that just because you get relaxers, that you hate your natural hair or something. To the majority, it is just a style and nothing more. I love natural hair, but as of now, relaxers are just simple for me. I really do think people make things worse than what they are.

 

[Southernbella.]

Exactly. I really get tired of people thinking that just because you get relaxers, that you hate your natural hair or something. To the majority, it is just a style and nothing more. I love natural hair, but as of now, relaxers are just simple for me. I really do think people make things worse than what they are.

I agree that having a relaxer doesn't mean you hate natural hair, but I have to disagree with the bolded. The majority have chewed up, broken off relaxed hair. That's not a style. If they truly believe having damaged hair is better than having nappy hair, something is wrong, IMO. The real world isn't like LHCF.

 

[Reinventing21]

I agree that having a relaxer doesn't mean you hate natural hair, but I have to disagree with the bolded. The majority have chewed up, broken off relaxed hair. That's not a style. If they truly believe having damaged hair is better than having nappy hair, something is wrong, IMO. The real world isn't like LHCF.

[/QUOTE]
That is so true ---thinking that damaged relaxed hair is somehow prettier or more accepatable than healthy natural hair is a BIG PROBLEM. And your right, the real world isn't like LHCF .....YET I think that the more women who walk around with healthy hair will cause others to evaluate their own practices & the the bar/standard will be raised.

 

[Ivy_Butter]

That is so true ---thinking that damaged relaxed hair is somehow prettier or more accepatable than healthy natural hair is a BIG PROBLEM. And your right, the real world isn't like LHCF .....YET I think that the more women who walk around with healthy hair will cause others to evaluate their own practices & the the bar/standard will be raised.[/quote]

Who ever said every natural head was healthy? If people (relaxed or natural don't take care of their hair it is still damaged. As much as people have a perception that something is wrong with natural hair, some people have the perception that every natural head of hair is a healthy head of hair. IMO the problem with black women and their hair isn't the relaxer or lack their of it is the care or lack their of.

 

[Ivy_Butter]

I do not like the term "Nappy/Natural Nazi". Why? Due to the historical significance of Nazism I do not think the term should be used lightly. I do not think that the relaxed/natural debate is so serious that it is on par with Nazism. I feel the same way about the word "lynch" being used in casual conversation. The historical significance is acute and I don't think the word should be played with under any circumstances.

Yes, I think all women should step away from the relaxers. And, yes I believe that the continued use of relaxers only supports the prevailing idea that natural hair is ugly and unacceptable. But, just by saying that I'm considered a "Nappy Nazi" and I think that characterization is unfair and uncalled for. I have never entertained the idea of killing someone because of their hair choices so to lump me in with a group of people who encouraged, supported, and carried out the murders of millions of people is just wrong.

I could not disagree more. People experiment with their hair because they want to. Some people dye their hair, so is that a statement of unacceptable hair color? No, its a matter of choice.

 

[hopeful]

I hope this thread remains peaceful and respectful. After being on this board 4 years now I have seen threads like this get really ugly...

 

[ayoung]

Noticed who's head of hair that was soon as I got to 1:13 Lex.

 

[jennboo]

Regarding the bolded above: I feel that the problem is not relaxers, but the way people generally think about nappy hair. I get that many feel that wearing relaxers promotes the idea of shame in one's natural hair, but really that supposed shame is only the result of the bigger problem: It's all about the negativity associated with type 4 hair as in bad hair, pelo muy malo. The hair itself, relaxed or not relaxed. Having relaxed hair does not give you the 'good hair' pass in society. It just gives you 'bad' hair that has been straightened. This concept of bad hair period is what needs to change & could change as society begins to become more aware of healthy (keyword) type 4 hair whether relaxed, fully natural (especially natural) or somewhere in between.

I truly believe that if everyone (all races) in the whole world had always had type 4 hair, someone still would have invented the straightening comb, relaxers, curls etc. Why? People like to experiment, be different, see something new, play, manipulate hair & styles. There would still be people with long hair fetishes, and those love short & sexy styles. Some people would like wearing their hair tighter coils, and others with looser coils. Some would like it straight, others would like braidouts. Diversity is a beautiful thing.

That is why I think there should be more focus on healthy hair of all types, straightened with relaxers or not. Think about it, even 100% naturals straighten their hair with heat every now & then, not cuz they believe straight is better, but it is something different to do. Relaxed heads are the opposite & sometimes manipulate their hair to mimic natural hair. Each can wear hair as they want the majority of the time, & when bored, change the hair.

The anger & frustration in the naturals vs relaxed argument really needs to diverted into more positive energy aimed toward changing the mentality that type 4 hair is bad & showing the world how healthy, versatile, & lovely type 4 hair can be NO MATTER HOW THE PERSON WANTS TO WEAR IT IN THAT MOMENT.[/quote]





This argument will result in nothing more than a deadlock...

The women with chemically treated hair will vehemently oppose any rhetoric that remotely suggests an affinity toward white standards of beauty.

The women who wear their hair in it's natural state will assert that white standards of beauty have done a number on black women, thus, the preoccupation with straighter textures.

The shame in one's natural hair is indeed the result of a larger issue, but realize that we are perpetuating and supporting this larger problem by succumbing to idealized standards.

Having relaxed hair makes one more accepted, integrated, and less threatening to the status quo. It garners the approval (and i use the word approval loosely) of the majority more so than a natural would, because straighter hair is less foreign to them.

It will be very difficult, if not darn near impossible, to eradicate this notion of bad hair if we continue to mimic majority ideals.

There is nothing wrong with experimenting, being different, diverse, and the like. However, one must think about the motivation to constantly and consistently adhere to the straight hair ideal. I'm not sure of the exact percentage, but someting like 75% of black women relax their hair?
Then you've got this pathological fear of kinky hair, so much so that it is denigrated, demonized, and viewed as something that needs to be fixed.

Naturals who consistently (all the time, 100% of the time, Can't be seen with their hair unpressed) wear their hair in straight styles and hold the same negative conceptions of kinky hair have also fallen victim to idealized standards.

How can we change the mentality of type 4 hair and show how versatile, beautiful, and lovely it is if it is burned straight all of the time?


*******let the backlash begin!!!!!!******

 

[Solitude]

I did not like the video because "the truth about black women and their hair" is an inaccurate title. People watch stuff like that and start to believe that black women really don't want to deal with their hair if they are not "natural" and that is simply not true.

I have relaxed hair and I never wear weaves. I've worn weaves maybe 5 or 6 times in my life. My hair is not eaten up and bald like that video & my mother relaxed my hair after I was old enough to decide for myself that I wanted to wear my hair straight. The video was biased, but whatever.

 

[diamondlady]

I really liked the video. I didn't agree with everything that it stated but I still liked it and some of it I did agree with.

One message was to stop hating on natural hair, which is a good message. I wore braids a couple of times and people made me feel so uncomfortable - like an alien or something. Some people said, they can't make you feel that way, you are just insecure, but tell me when people are staring and making smart remarks, aren't you going to feel uncomfortable? I've heard some remarks made about women wearing natural hair, and they were terrible remarks, and a lots of laughs and giggles.

I don't have anything against the weaves and the lace wigs but some people don't maintain them well and they look horrible. I hate to say this but some are just embarrassing because they are so jacked up. On the TV reality show, "The Real House Wives of Orange County", (the one out of Atlanta, Ga.) the blonde lady and the one named NeNe have terrible looking wigs but they are better than some of the jacked heads I seen in some shopping centers, malls and churches.

Anyway, Natural, relaxed, or wig, everyone is free to wear what they want

 

[Amerie123]

I really just don't like the fact that many people think that black women are not happy with their natural hair all together. I know for a fact that a lot of black women are not like that, so i disagree with that statement. I can say a lot more, but it would be beating a dead horse. UGH!

 

[Solitude]

I really liked the video. I didn't agree with everything that it stated but I still liked it and some of it I did agree with.

One message was to stop hating on natural hair, which is a good message. I wore braids a couple of times and people made me feel so uncomfortable - like an alien or something. Some people said, they can't make you feel that way, you are just insecure, but tell me when people are staring and making smart remarks, aren't you going to feel uncomfortable? I've heard some remarks made about women wearing natural hair, and they were terrible remarks, and a lots of laughs and giggles.

I don't have anything against the weaves and the lace wigs but some people don't maintain them well and they look horrible. I hate to say this but some are just embarrassing because they are so jacked up. On the TV reality show, "The Real House Wives of Orange County", (the one out of Atlanta, Ga.) the blonde lady and the one named NeNe have terrible looking wigs but they are better than some of the jacked heads I seen in some shopping centers, malls and churches.

Anyway, Natural, relaxed, or wig, everyone is free to wear what they want

I hope you don't mind me quoting you b/c I am not talking about you directly, but.....

Who is hating on natural hair??? There are a ton of videos on youtube from naturals speaking negatively about relaxers, but I have seen absolutely no videos of relaxed heads saying anything about naturals unless it was a response video.

People with relaxed hair have to preface everything we say with "Natural hair is beautiful...." or else we "hate ourselves." But, people with natural hair can say all kinds of nasty things about people with relaxed hair. It's just silly, it's a double standard. The number of negative things said about relaxed hair here on LHCF is often disappointing. I feel bad for women who make some of those videos because they have low self-esteem in general and it pretty much has nothing to do with hair.

There are a lot of straight hair styles & weaves that I don't like. There are a lot of natural hair styles that I don't like. It has nothing to do with relaxed vs. non-relaxed. I have a friend who is natural who dislikes dreads. It's not always that serious.

 

[TaurusAngel]

I agree that having a relaxer doesn't mean you hate natural hair, but I have to disagree with the bolded. The majority have chewed up, broken off relaxed hair. That's not a style. If they truly believe having damaged hair is better than having nappy hair, something is wrong, IMO. The real world isn't like LHCF.

I agree to an extent. I really don't believe the majority of people have unhealthy hair. I know there is a large number, but i don't believe they are in the majority. And having a relaxer isn't the only way to have damaged hair. Naturals can have damaged broken off hair as well.

 

[pri]

Good video..very encouraging. Thanks!

 

[skatergurljubulee]

Um,
I didn't know until I started researching better hair practices that I was holding hands with Satan because I relaxed my hair. Or, that I would be a "Nazi" (I hate that term, just writing it...)if I had natural hair. Gotta love the internet.
I probably will be stoned, but...

Hair is just hair.

I do not hate myself because I relax my hair, or think badly of myself because I'm not beating down the system with my coiled and curly hair on display in my place of work (HOME).
I love hair in every state that it's in. I LOVE hair. I wasn't raised to consider it more than what it is. Dead cells. Though, dead cells I could dye, straighten, curl...Basically have fun with. lol
I would hope that when I'm dead and there's a funeral, the last thing someone will be talking about will be how I wore my hair in life. Hopefully they'll be talking about how I LIVED my life. Because hair is just hair.

I know, I know... blasphemy. God forbid I consider the stuff that grows out of my head just stuff that grows out of my head instead of a way of life. Or my self hatred coming to the surface.
LOL Nobody's thinking about my hair when I'm walking hand in hand proudly with my WHITE husband and our BIRACIAL son. And when we adopt our ASIAN babies, I don't think what my HAIR is doing will really concern anyone. I'll be making a far bigger statement with my DEEDS than my hair could ever make.
...Sorry for being long winded. This was not meant in an angry way, just expressing my opinion. We're all entitled whether good or bad and I know the ladies on here are always open to hearing other points of view and ways of life.

 

[skatergurljubulee]

I hope you don't mind me quoting you b/c I am not talking about you directly, but.....

Who is hating on natural hair??? There are a ton of videos on youtube from naturals speaking negatively about relaxers, but I have seen absolutely no videos of relaxed heads saying anything about naturals unless it was a response video.

People with relaxed hair have to preface everything we say with "Natural hair is beautiful...." or else we "hate ourselves." But, people with natural hair can say all kinds of nasty things about people with relaxed hair. It's just silly, it's a double standard. The number of negative things said about relaxed hair here on LHCF is often disappointing. I feel bad for women who make some of those videos because they have low self-esteem in general and it pretty much has nothing to do with hair.

There are a lot of straight hair styles & weaves that I don't like. There are a lot of natural hair styles that I don't like. It has nothing to do with relaxed vs. non-relaxed. I have a friend who is natural who dislikes dreads. It's not always that serious.

Thank you! It isn't that serious and I guess that was what I was trying to express. We all love hair on this board. But there's absolutely no need to start cuttin' over it! lol

 

[luckiestdestiny]

Have you guys seen this video???

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-6eyJ4Y7eo&feature=related

So I was casually watching you-tube vids about straightening natural hair since I'm contemplating going natural and I ran across this video. Okay so I had no problem with it until about 1:13 into it...........I noticed a familiar head of LHCF hair....Whattttt!!!

I'm not gonna put her on blast though.

We really need to start putting these fotki's on lock...I'm so serious.

I see what you mean about people taking pics w/o permission...if that is what was done. Which is why I'm always cutting out my face...

 

[lexi84]

Okay yall I didnt start this thread to start an argument between the natural and relaxed. I was trying to show why its important to lock photo albums. Whether you relax or you're natural its all a matter of personal choice. Please stop. I dont like drama and computer arguments. There are more important things in life. All this nit-picking and "I dont like when this word/phrase is used" is crazy talk.

I regret making this thread. I know better now.

 

[Solitude]

Okay yall I didnt start this thread to start an argument between the natural and relaxed. I was trying to show why its important to lock photo albums. Whether you relax or you're natural its all a matter of personal choice. Please stop. I dont like drama and computer arguments. There are more important things in life. All this nit-picking and "I dont like when this word/phrase is used" is crazy talk.

I regret making this thread. I know better now.

Yeah, these threads always seem to go a little overboard; however, in relation to that particular picture (which I immediately recognized) it probably wasn't from a fotki- it was likely chosen because of the articles where it is featured; a direct statement to what the video was about.

 

[heyfranz]

Sistaslick has photos on associatedcontent - that's where i first saw her hair. It's a public site

 

[Firefly]

That pic is from her fotki page and it's her recent updated avatar. That is definitely one of the reasons that I lock my fotki and I make sure that when someone asks me for the pw, it's either someone from one of these hair forums or they have a fotki of their own. When my album was open I had some real freaks leaving disgusting comments from all over the world. I even had a stalker so now I don't take chances leaving it open.

 

[Dak]

That pic is from her fotki page and it's her recent updated avatar. That is definitely one of the reasons that I lock my fotki and I make sure that when someone asks me for the pw, it's either someone from one of these hair forums or they have a fotki of their own. When my album was open I had some real freaks leaving disgusting comments from all over the world. I even had a stalker so now I don't take chances leaving it open.

Firefly, so sorry to hear that happened to you! When people can be anonymous it can really bring up some ugliness.

 

[Tee]

I think the video was pushing the envelope somewhat.

• Do I think Beyonce, Gabby, and Mary J B. wants to be white because they have straight, color altered, weaves.......No.
• Do I think it was cool for the person to use Sistaslick's picture.......No.

I am mad I wasted 5 mins of my life watching it.

 

[MissJ]

I love this video. Thanks!

 

[msa]

I could not disagree more. People experiment with their hair because they want to. Some people dye their hair, so is that a statement of unacceptable hair color? No, its a matter of choice.

From what I've seen on this board and IRL most individuals are not making the choice to relax for themselves. Usually, it's mothers who choose to relax their daughters hair while they are still children. If you were a teenager and decided you wanted straight hair, that's one thing. But, most people admit on this board that their hair has been relaxed since they were young and it was their parents who made that decision.

I personally don't consider relaxing experimenting or just another hairstyle because of its permanent nature. But, that's just me. And when 70-80% of black women relax their hair on a regular basis that tells me that there's a little more to it than just "experimentation".

Who is hating on natural hair??? There are a ton of videos on youtube from naturals speaking negatively about relaxers, but I have seen absolutely no videos of relaxed heads saying anything about naturals unless it was a response video.

People with relaxed hair have to preface everything we say with "Natural hair is beautiful...." or else we "hate ourselves." But, people with natural hair can say all kinds of nasty things about people with relaxed hair. It's just silly, it's a double standard. The number of negative things said about relaxed hair here on LHCF is often disappointing. I feel bad for women who make some of those videos because they have low self-esteem in general and it pretty much has nothing to do with hair.

I've noticed for a while that relaxed heads tend to insult natural hair in a less obvious way. Most of the time I'm sure it's not on purpose or directed at anyone in particular. I've seen so many threads with titles like: "how can I tame this nappy new growth" or "I just couldn't deal with this nappy mess, I had to relax". It's those subtle jabs at natural hair that generally make me cringe. The tone used is so negative.

And don't get me started on the fact that people on this board act like the only way to enjoy your hair is by wearing it straight. When people say things like "what's the point have long hair if you can't wear it out flowing and straight?", IMO that implies that hair in its natural state is neither enjoyable nor beautiful.

It bothers me that straight hair is still considered the default position. Straight hair is considered "normal" and "beautiful" and natural hair, while accepted, is still marginalized. And, the use of relaxers just reinforces that IMO.