CaribbeanQueen
Well-Known Member
What is it about bad boys that makes them so attractive? Why do so many women overlook the 'nice-guy, nerdy type' but fall head over heels for the 'thug lovin'? Do you have a thing for bad boys?
Spinoff: Good Girls and BAD boys
- Thread starter CaribbeanQueen
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Define "bad".
If bad means a thuggish, menace to society burden, then no.
If bad means not afraid of confrontation and stands up for himself, pays his own bills, has his own (house, car, job, life, ect) and only wants to love and spoil me then YES! Give me a "bad" boy anyday. =)
If bad means a thuggish, menace to society burden, then no.
If bad means not afraid of confrontation and stands up for himself, pays his own bills, has his own (house, car, job, life, ect) and only wants to love and spoil me then YES! Give me a "bad" boy anyday. =)
When i think of "bad boy" i think of someone who is trifling (ie. cheating/lying) and disrespectful. Probably also arrogant.
I will take nerdy and nice dude ANYDAY. I find it weird that i have 3 guy friends who claim they can't find a good chic bc all the females seem to gravitate toward the "bad guy". they talk about how they see their male friends and relatives dog out females consistently and the females just keep coming back for more.
I just find that hard to believe. at the first sign of trifling, i give guys the boot with a quickness. you can be fine as all outdoors, but you still gots to go.
I will take nerdy and nice dude ANYDAY. I find it weird that i have 3 guy friends who claim they can't find a good chic bc all the females seem to gravitate toward the "bad guy". they talk about how they see their male friends and relatives dog out females consistently and the females just keep coming back for more.
I just find that hard to believe. at the first sign of trifling, i give guys the boot with a quickness. you can be fine as all outdoors, but you still gots to go.
glamazon386
Well-Known Member
I don't like bad boys. I don't have time for that foolishness. Give me a good old corny nice guy.
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Theo
New Member
I had the corny, nice, nerdy, frugal, good boy and boooyyy lemme tell you! Behind closed doors they can flip the script for you and turn into your little "bad boy" very quickly so don't believe the hype and take a chance.
Lol... I used to be into the whole "bad boy" type. The men I dated weren't necessarily bad men, they just had that bad boy swagger, if that makes any sense. And honestly, I couldn't tell you what makes that attractive to me, cuz I am the nicest of the nice girls! Preacher's daughter, college virgin, honor student, all of that! But my first bf was a drug dealer, and my 2nd bf was straight out of South Philly and satisfyingly hood.
I grew out of that stage tho... both of them gave me way too much headache.
ALWAYZL8
Member
I've always been attracted to the nerdy and smart guys. I'm attracted to me that remind me of the men in my family. For whatever reason, they don't seem to be attracted to me. Let a thug see me, and he'll be running and yelling all the way down the street. I'll be able to see his platinum and gold teeth bouncing off his brand new fresh out the shrink wrap bright white T-shirt, which gives me enough time to keep it moving! I'm a good girl...shouldn't I attract a "good" guy? I've always been told that you attract what you are, so what's the problem?
cocoberry10
New Member
What is this a spinoff of?
cocoberry10
New Member
CaribbeanQueen, I actually posted a very interesting article a few days ago (I got it in an email from a friend). I think this sums up very well what women really want. I don't think women really want a thug. I'll give my thoughts in the next post. Read below
Even though we are ladies, I was sent this by email from a friend. I think it has a lot of relevance
Dating for Nice Guys
http://dating-advice.suite101.com/article.cfm/dating_for_nice_guys
Author: Phil Marley
Published: April 3, 2007
Why do women ignore the shy, nice guys and date the arrogant 'jerks'? Here's how nice guys can change the rules and get dates whenever they want.
It’s the complaint of shy single men the world over: women pass them over for arrogant, aggressive, abusive men. When these men inevitably cheat on them, the women moan about their experiences – often to the nice guys themselves. Some of them even have the gall to say they ‘Wish more guys were like you’. And then they find themselves another jerk while the nice guy stays single.
Things aren’t exactly as they appear. Nice guys, completely understandably, often have a slightly skewed perspective thanks to years of being ignored. They see the men who are successful with women as their enemies. If they’ve been out of a relationship for some time, they can sometimes become out of touch with the way women think – women become mysterious and unreadable to them. So to try and make sense of things, nice guys make assumptions – those guys are jerks and they get dates, so women must prefer jerks.
This isn’t what’s happening. If you’re a nice guy and you want to get more dates, it’s absolutely crucial that you understand what’s really going on. The truth isn’t as easy to swallow as the myth you’ve been sold, but it will open your eyes and allow you to be massively more successful with women.
First of all, women aren’t stupid. They aren’t attracted to jerks. Tough as it may be to accept, the men nice guys resent aren’t idiots. So why do they appear to be?
When someone’s your enemy, it’s easy to make snap judgements about their character. What nice guys see as overwhelming arrogance is usually just confidence. What appears to be smugness is just a happy, relaxed nature. This is actually great news for nice guys, because the traits these men are displaying are easily learnable.
What about the way these ‘jerks’ treat women? While it’s certainly true that some men do treat their partners badly, this trait tends to be magnified out of all proportion when seen through the eyes of a nice guy. Two things tend to happen.
Firstly, nice guys observe a few genuinely abusive men who are successful with women and assume that all men they see getting lots of dates must have the same trait.
Secondly, nice guys sometimes misinterpret things. When a female friend complains of something her new ‘idiot boyfriend’ did, the nice guy forgets he’s only hearing one side of the story and loses sight of the fact that, in all relationships, some arguing is normal. The nice guy thinks I’d never treat her like that! In truth, what he’s seeing is probably a normal, healthy relationship.
So Why do ‘Jerks’ Get More Dates?
In summary, then, why do women prefer jerks? They don’t. Why do nice guys finish last? They don’t. The ‘jerks’ are nice guys. What the women find attractive in them is:
How You Can Get More Dates
- Confidence – These men aren’t shy. They can approach any woman.
- They know how to talk to women – they know how to chat-up without being cheesy, they’re positive and they give value when women talk to them.
The good news is that anyone can acquire these skills. If you’re a nice guy, you now know that you have a lot more in common with the ‘jerks’ than you thought. If you want to, you can learn to be confident and to talk to girls. Suddenly, you’ll be one of those guys you thought was a jerk. And nice guys will wonder why you get more dates.
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