Spinning Spinny! POLL: What Race is Your SO/DH?

[*~*Afrolicious*~*]

..........................

 

[Theresamonet]

Yeah, it seems like that would require a simple yes or no "do you date interracially" poll.

Anyhoodle, I think it's interesting that the last time I looked at this poll, the amount of black SOs was double the amount of black DHs... I made a post about the poll being deliberately differentiated that way... and now they're the same Cowinkydink.

I'm confused cause I thought everyone on LHCF was married. Those results are showing way too many SOs We need a baby mama poll next to really reveal some truths.

 

[PPGbubbles]

I should do a spinny that is sure to get cheadled

Are you light skin or dark skinded and is your mate a complimentary color....and sit back and watch all the souls burn at the light/darkie combos

 

[Qtee]

1/2 Colombian 1/2Panamanian
100% black
I didn't vote because I couldn't choose both.

Sent from my PC36100 using PC36100

 

[Esthi777]

My DH is a gun toting, big truck driving, Harley riding white man

 

[BeautifulFlower]

^^^^ That's cute.

 

[Evallusion]

SO is Ivorian (african)

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy Prevail

 

[OriginalMe]

My DH is Chocolate American

 

[ebonylocs]

This poll doesn't include those of us who happen to be single. My whole thread was questioning why IR dating was so common...as in why are more women on this particular forum either in an interracial relationship, dating/dated interracially, or are at least interested in dating interracially, even though most articles on the topic point otherwise...

Nelli04: Well, the articles on the topic that point otherwise and the movement you notice on this board are all part of the same phenomenon. It has being going on for a few years on the internet. A few black women who were married / dating interracially took it upon themselves to start being "evangelical" about IR dating, i.e. to tell BW that with the numbers being what they are, BW were reducing their opportunities for love and marriage by only considering BM. Those various blogs, discussion board threads, etc. piqued the interest of some BW that might not have considered IR before. It became a "topical issue" online and in other media. So that's why you see both the articles about BW's loyalty to black men, and a (possible) spike in BW's interest in non-BM.

I say "possible", because it is difficult to tell if there are "so many" as you say. Because 25 people on the board might be very vocal about IR and discuss it in threads, post about their IR marriages, relationships and aspirations. But there are thousands of LHCF members out there not posting in these threads, so you don't know what their perspective is... Difficult to get any accurate idea of if you're witnessing a vocal but miniscule minority or a substantial proportion of board members.

 

[Anakinsmomma]

My SO is an Asian man (Filipino)

Hi! *wave*
My fiancé is Filipino.


Sent from my iPhone using LHCF

 

[Anakinsmomma]

I should do a spinny that is sure to get cheadled

Are you light skin or dark skinded and is your mate a complimentary color....and sit back and watch all the souls burn at the light/darkie combos

Hahahahahahaha! and the apparent self hate at the light/light combos...


Sent from my iPhone using LHCF

 

[AlekHidell]

@Nelli04: Well, the articles on the topic that point otherwise and the movement you notice on this board are all part of the same phenomena. It has being going on for a few years on the internet. A few black women who were married / dating interracially took it upon themselves to start being "evangelical" about IR dating, i.e. to tell BW that with the numbers being what they are, BW were reducing their opportunities for love and marriage by only considering BM. Those various blogs, discussion board threads, etc. piqued the interest of some BW that might not have considered IR before. It became a "topical issue" online and in other media. So that's why you see both the articles about BW's loyalty to black men, and a (possible) spike in BW's interest in non-BM.

I say "possible", because it is difficult to tell if there are "so many" as you say. Because 25 people on the board might be very vocal about IR and discuss it in threads, post about their IR marriages, relationships and aspirations. But there are thousands of LHCF members out there not posting in these threads, so you don't know what their perspective is... Difficult to get any accurate idea of if you're witnessing a vocal but miniscule minority or a substantial proportion of board members.

I'm already regretting this even as I clicked reply, but oh well.

This is true. Some of us may even want to contribute, but the overall board climate can hinder sharing. Especially if the intent is to do just that - share - and nothing more. Not to recruit or preach the virtues of IRR. Not to throw all black men under the bus. Not be put in a position to have our motives challenged and the legitimacy of our type of relationship questioned. And while some may say "hey, that would be welcome--what negativity could result from that?" I say "b.s." because board history is on my side. There are too many unhappy and insecure people who will choose to believe the worst about what you post or lump you in with the crazies. Moreso about this topic than some others (and I would add the lightskin/darkskin threads to that too). So we sit and lurk .

I know I can only speak for myself, but I bet that there are lot more lhcf posters who happen to be in IRRs who just . . .live [and I don't mean "live" as a euphemism for being "colorblind" or similar hogwash]. But couples who aren't thinking about marriage statistics or the plight of any one community or about proving anything to people who seem a little too invested in others' relationships and dating habits. I bet I am not the only poster who wasn't even thinking about an entire demographic of men when they chose to accept the marriage proposal or date from one guy. I cannot be the only one who couldn't have cared less that there were plenty of good men from any one specific ethnicity or race, including my own. I just wanted my man to be a good man. [I don't say this to dismiss those who may have at one time assumed their future included a black man and who have come to be open about other possibilities. Just saying that in actual real life moments, most aren't thinking that deeply]

But if we're going to talk about vocal minorities, I would say there is definitely one that is disinterested in the women who would love to share normal (often hilarious) IRR dating and marriage stuff. Nah, they are far more interested in the slightest whiff of superiority, self-hatred, or desperation from a specific post or two. They want to stay mad and offended. Just my opinion.

 

[UmSumayyah]

^^wholeheartedly seconded.

Though I do find the broad sociological implications, discussions, causes interesting. When larger serious discussion about BW IRR began in earnest, I learned alot.

 

[AlekHidell]

^^wholeheartedly seconded.

Though I do find the broad sociological implications, discussions, causes interesting. When larger serious discussion about BW IRR began in earnest, I learned alot.

I completely agree. I definitely don't want to give the impression that I don't feel it's worth examining from a macro level. I think it's fun to talk about and I think the personal can be political, too. I guess the spirit of my prior post was more focusing on the many times I've seen broader discussions used to attack specific posters who were open enough to share their individual experiences.

 

[BeautifulFlower]

I'm confused cause I thought everyone on LHCF was married. Those results are showing way too many SOs We need a baby mama poll next to really reveal some truths.

 

[Ediese]

He's black, and from St. Croix, just like me. I'm so happy about that. I gave up hope a long time ago of marrying someone from my culture. There he was all along.

 

[LunadeMiel]

DH is black South African.

 

[Ton 太太]

So the results of the poll show that 70% of respondents have a black husband or boyfriend.

Just as I thought, IR relationships aren't as pervasive on here as some seem to think.

I'm sort of shocked by this...it seemed that several posters here were dating, married to, or trying to marry white men. Huh.

My husband is from Asia (Mongol).

ETA: I also thought there would be a lot more married people, just because of the type of comments I see in other threads about unwed whimmins and other related stuff.

 

[tocktick]

When I first saw that "why is irr so common on lhcf?" thread (just the title alone), the first thing that popped into my head was "but is it?". Imo, something being often discussed doesn't necessarily mean it's happening en masse. Previous polls here showed that. Upon reading the thread, I was surprised the same thought I had wasn't one of the very first posts.

The poll kind of confirms what I believed all along - that actually women dating non-black men here do not outnumber those who do date bm at present.

 

[cherry.a]

My SO is Greek.

 

[PracticallyMe]

My DH is Black American.

 

[LovelyLouboutin]

My SO is black and portuguese.

 

[EMJazzy]

I can't see a poll from my cell but in answer to the question my husband is black.

Sent from my DROIDX using DROIDX

 

[ebonylocs]

I'm already regretting this even as I clicked reply, but oh well.

This is true. Some of us may even want to contribute, but the overall board climate can hinder sharing. Especially if the intent is to do just that - share - and nothing more. Not to recruit or preach the virtues of IRR. Not to throw all black men under the bus. Not be put in a position to have our motives challenged and the legitimacy of our type of relationship questioned. And while some may say "hey, that would be welcome--what negativity could result from that?" I say "b.s." because board history is on my side. There are too many unhappy and insecure people who will choose to believe the worst about what you post or lump you in with the crazies. Moreso about this topic than some others (and I would add the lightskin/darkskin threads to that too). So we sit and lurk .

I know I can only speak for myself, but I bet that there are lot more lhcf posters who happen to be in IRRs who just . . .live [and I don't mean "live" as a euphemism for being "colorblind" or similar hogwash]. But couples who aren't thinking about marriage statistics or the plight of any one community or about proving anything to people who seem a little too invested in others' relationships and dating habits. I bet I am not the only poster who wasn't even thinking about an entire demographic of men when they chose to accept the marriage proposal or date from one guy. I cannot be the only one who couldn't have cared less that there were plenty of good men from any one specific ethnicity or race, including my own. I just wanted my man to be a good man. [I don't say this to dismiss those who may have at one time assumed their future included a black man and who have come to be open about other possibilities. Just saying that in actual real life moments, most aren't thinking that deeply]

But if we're going to talk about vocal minorities, I would say there is definitely one that is disinterested in the women who would love to share normal (often hilarious) IRR dating and marriage stuff. Nah, they are far more interested in the slightest whiff of superiority, self-hatred, or desperation from a specific post or two. They want to stay mad and offended. Just my opinion.

I don't want to derail the thread, but I wanted to say I agree with your post, not from a personal perspective, because I'm not in an IR, but from the perspective that I believe it is unfortunate that people (on both sides of the equation) often have to "take it there" - with the BM bashing, or the allegations of self hatred, etc. And as you implied, the "evangelical" IRR participants who have some kind of socio-political agenda in mind must be differentiated from those who just happen to be in an IRR. We who have been around these parts long enough remember when Eva burst on the scene with her DBRBM theories and alienated a lot of people. Partially as a result of those extremists who link that kind of rhetoric to IR, there is a tendency for some to react defensively to *anyone* who favours or participates in IRs.

 

[MissYocairis]

Black. Black daddy. Black mama.

 

[MissYocairis]

So the results of the poll show that 70% of respondents have a black husband or boyfriend.

Just as I thought, IR relationships aren't as pervasive on here as some seem to think.

and if your DH/SO self-identifies as black, rather than interracial, then the numbers go up. (I know plenty of IR people that self-identify as black....not on paper, but in life)

 

[MissYocairis]

My DH is a gun toting, big truck driving, Harley riding white man

I just KNEW when I read your post that I would look over and see that you are living in the south. They have gun toting, big truck driving, Harley riding white men in Cali? Loves it. Does your DH hunt, [USER]Esthi[/USER]?

 

[adf23]

My DH is AA

 

[Esthi777]

~Charlotte*York~ LOL! We got 'em here too! There's some of everything here in Cali. He does hunt but not animals. He hunts...bad guys, lol! He's part of our city's finest They're never "off-duty"

 

[abcd09]

My DH-to-be is a pale republican white American from the midwest