SPIN OFF: Honesty-How do you not say TOO Much?

[SimpleKomplexity]

I'm real open. If you ask me, I'll tell you. I have nothing hide. So back in the way when Mr. ICC and myself were talking I have told him the truth. How many guys I have been with, the reasons why we broke up, what I didn't like about them, how long I waited to have sex with them, and etc.

It didn't go well In fact, it NEVER goes well now that I think about. For example, Mr. ICC was like EW you've been with a fat dude? So I nasty fat dude has touched your body . MORE THAN ONE TIME!? So then he's very repulsed by this even though he has been with a obese AND ugly girl at least the boy was kute, but I digress.

I'll occasionally say someone is kute if asked. I'll tell people what I'm thinking no matter how wide open it is. If you ask me a question about my past I answer it.

How do you be honest in relationships and friendships without telling to much?

 

[jamaraa]

Consider the things that YOU don't want to hear. That's a good starting point. Many times people use "honesty" as a weapon rather than as a way to connect, methinks. My rule of thumb is "if I wouldn't want someone to say this to me, I should not say it to them UNLESS absolutely necessary."

 

[SimpleKomplexity]

Consider the things that YOU don't want to hear. That's a good starting point. Many times people use "honesty" as a weapon rather than as a way to connect, methinks. My rule of thumb is "if I wouldn't want someone to say this to me, I should not say it to them UNLESS absolutely necessary."

I guess that's the problem. I don't care about the past unless ure like a sex addict or something. Those things are nominal to me.

 

[GreenD]

For the most part people that ask me something, know I'm honest with them. I guess that's why they ask me. However, depending on that person's feelings about something, I won't be so honest only because I know it would hurt/crush them and I want to maintain the relationship. On some questions I give people the option, the red or green pill. I can tell you straight up, no chaser or I can sugar coat it, your choice.

But generally don't ask me, if you don't really want my answer to it.

 

[kismettt]

don't be too open too soon.

idk. i just think you know when someone is going to judge you based on your past. my ex was throwing out signs like no one's business.

but time will reveal someone's true colors, so keep it to yourself until you know.

 

[hopeful]

Your openess should correlate with how close, how serious, how much you trust that person. To me it's about boundaries. If you are a man who is not fully committed to and loving me you are not getting full disclosure on anything because many things are not his business. IMO there are only like three people on this earth who know just about everything about me: my husband, my mother, and my best friend. And even they don't know EVERYTHING. Some things should just be between you and God. And some people will ask just about anything because they are nosy. I've had people ask how much my house, my wedding ring, and my car cost (many times) virtually strangers, I never tell them because it's none if their business.