so my best friend tells me her man well

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nychaelasymone

Well-Known Member
x-man is a cross dresser! Dahell!!! He wears her clothes and her make-up. I would have never guessed from the many times I've been around them. She's still living with the man trying to save money for her own place. Okay......what is wrong with her? She has a mother who says she can stay w/ her until she has saved enough money but she rather stay with down-low dude. I swear...what is the world coming too and dahell is wrong with her......:wallbash: Just venting......
 
nychaelasymone said:
x-man is a cross dresser! Dahell!!! He wears her clothes and her make-up. I would have never guessed from the many times I've been around them. She's still living with the man trying to save money for her own place. Okay......what is wrong with her? She has a mother who says she can stay w/ her until she has saved enough money but she rather stay with down-low dude. I swear...what is the world coming too and dahell is wrong with her......:wallbash: Just venting......
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Damn :nono:
 
nychaelasymone said:
x-man is a cross dresser! Dahell!!! He wears her clothes and her make-up. I would have never guessed from the many times I've been around them. She's still living with the man trying to save money for her own place. Okay......what is wrong with her? She has a mother who says she can stay w/ her until she has saved enough money but she rather stay with down-low dude. I swear...what is the world coming too and dahell is wrong with her......:wallbash: Just venting......
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...isn't it possible to be this way without being gay?
 
i used to work at Frederick's and a lot of men would come in and buy stuff for themselves. i don't even know why she told you that. now you are going to be looking at him funny and questioning her as well. she might be helping him put the stuff on or they play dress up together!LOL! (i'm just playin!) but maybe she does want to be bothered with her mother because you now how it is when you live with your parents. you have to live and obey their rules since you are living under their roof. it might be easier for her to stay.
 
wow. I wonder what that would be like. You wake up one morning and the outfit you picked out to wear for the day is not laying across the chaise lounge.... u go downstairs to prepare coffee and he's wearing it...:nono:
 
I just keep picturing this 6'1+ dude walking around in lipstick and a 5 0'clock shadow...I mean really. What's next? Is she wearing the strap-on a he's taking it up the *** like the woman.....

I do quesiton her....I do not believe she values herself, but then again, she is the person who told me she can't live without the touch of a man.....I do pray God watches over her because I just see her becoming a statistic....she truly believe condoms work 100% and that she needs her physical needs satisfied. I wish she would just learn to be on her own and learn to love herself and put her children first
 
nychaelasymone said:
I just keep picturing this 6'1+ dude walking around in lipstick and a 5 0'clock shadow...I mean really. What's next? Is she wearing the strap-on a he's taking it up the *** like the woman.....

I do quesiton her....I do not believe she values herself, but then again, she is the person who told me she can't live without the touch of a man.....I do pray God watches over her because I just see her becoming a statistic....she truly believe condoms work 100% and that she needs her physical needs satisfied. I wish she would just learn to be on her own and learn to love herself and put her children first
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She has kids!!!! Do they live with her and the cross-dresser? How did she explain that to the youngins?????
 
rayne said:
She has kids!!!! Do they live with her and the cross-dresser? How did she explain that to the youngins?????
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The kids do not know he does this. This is a blended family, she has 2 children, he as 3 chidren and none of the children know. Seriously, there are even deeper issues than this floating around with this family. The more I know, the sadder my heart grows. I can't deal...not my problem but I'm sooooo scared for these kids. They are going to be 'f'up in the head later in life....all because mommy didn't love herself enough to love them more.....

oh yeah....they all live in the same house....
 
joyousnerd said:
Just because he likes to cross-dress doesn't mean he's gay.

If she's cool with it, then what's the problem?
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The fact that he's not sure he's GAY and the fact that there are 5 children walking around this house not knowing their father likes wigs, lipstick, panties, and mommy's clothes......there's a lot wrong with this. Sorry but how do you explain this to a child?
 
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Same thing happened to my cousin, but she knew her guy was a cross dresser and she insisted he wasn't gay. Well...couple months later they broke up, why? Because he was GAY!! :lachen:
 
I'm sorry, but that is hilarious!!(and sad) I don't know what I would do if I saw my my man with thick ankles sauntering in my living room with some pumps and a red silk gown, tossing a wig over his shoulders..omg..that is too wild. I would probably bust out laughing for lack of being able to process it.

I remember reading/seeing something about men who like to cross dress, but do not consider themselves gay or have any sexual relations with men. It was something about seeing their mothers as children and wanting to be closer to her but being unable to or something like that.

I hope your friends wises up...that man has deep issues...but at least he told her about his feminine side...and I hope he replenishes her wardrobe after he stretches her ish out.
 
Duchesse said:
I'm sorry, but that is hilarious!!(and sad) I don't know what I would do if I saw my my man with thick ankles sauntering in my living room with some pumps and a red silk gown, tossing a wig over his shoulders..omg..that is too wild. I would probably bust out laughing for lack of being able to process it.

I remember reading/seeing something about men who like to cross dress, but do not consider themselves gay or have any sexual relations with men. It was something about seeing their mothers as children and wanting to be closer to her but being unable to or something like that.

I hope your friends wises up...that man has deep issues...but at least he told her about his feminine side...and I hope he replenishes her wardrobe after he stretches her ish out.
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I only hope she wises up but she hasn't changed since I've known her. Can't live without a man, she needs one to validate her. I just wish she could see her behavior is damaging to her self and her little girls. *sigh*
 
CantBeCopied said:
...isn't it possible to be this way without being gay?
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I think so, CBC. It scares me either way. What if he decides to have a sex change? I feel sad for both of them. This is can't be easy for either of them.

It's my prayer that she doesn't become bitter and ends up not trusting men. My prayer for him is that he gets help and is not outted or tormented.
 
joyousnerd said:
Just because he likes to cross-dress doesn't mean he's gay.

If she's cool with it, then what's the problem?
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The problem is 'denial'. Neither of them can afford to be with their heads in the sand. Too many emotions and feelings are involved and the children. They both need to confront this situation head on and deal with it.

If he's gay or desires to be a transexual, he needs to come out with it rather than lead her on and/or other women whom he could become involved with in the future.

People must be honest with themselves and with each other about who they are in a relationship. Too much is at stake. If she's in denial, and staying with him, thinking he's not gay or desires to be a transexual, OR worse that she can/will 'change' him, it's only making it worse for herself and the children.

I feel so sad for all of them. :nono:
 
Shimmie said:
I think so, CBC. It scares me either way. What if he decides to have a sex change? I feel sad for both of them. This is can't be easy for either of them.

It's my prayer that she doesn't become bitter and ends up not trusting men. My prayer for him is that he gets help and is not outted or tormented.
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too late, I asked her why she would stay with him knowing he liked cross dressing? It didn't bother her when they were dating but now that he said that he doesn't want a relationship with her anymore, she said his cross dressing makes it easier for her to get over the relationship. What bothers me, is that if he had not broken things off, she would still be happily dating him. Now, with that said, she still bothers me because she has no standards for the men she dates. If he has a 'tool' and treats her decently, she will be with that man. My problem with her is her low self esteem and the fact that she doens't believe she should have standards. I'm also sad for her because she does not know how to be alone. She is not happy unless she has a man in her life....she can't live without sex. She has problems but I can't help her anymore. She doesn't listen, welll she won't listen to anyone. It's her way or no way. Now I just found out that she is going out on a date with another guy from her church. Her oldest daughter does not like this man and does not want her to go out with him. In her mind, its because her children still like her ex and will get over it. She can't see that they just want and need her. Sad...none the less
 
nychaelasymone said:
too late, I asked her why she would stay with him knowing he liked cross dressing? It didn't bother her when they were dating but now that he said that he doesn't want a relationship with her anymore, she said his cross dressing makes it easier for her to get over the relationship. What bothers me, is that if he had not broken things off, she would still be happily dating him. Now, with that said, she still bothers me because she has no standards for the men she dates. If he has a 'tool' and treats her decently, she will be with that man. My problem with her is her low self esteem and the fact that she doens't believe she should have standards. I'm also sad for her because she does not know how to be alone. She is not happy unless she has a man in her life....she can't live without sex. She has problems but I can't help her anymore. She doesn't listen, welll she won't listen to anyone. It's her way or no way. Now I just found out that she is going out on a date with another guy from her church. Her oldest daughter does not like this man and does not want her to go out with him. In her mind, its because her children still like her ex and will get over it. She can't see that they just want and need her. Sad...none the less
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I can see how this frustrates you. You have a dear friend that you care about who is messing up her life and she doesn't 'see' it. :sad:

I have a friend who has 'stuck' by a man for over 10 years of her life. He's already made it plain that he doesn't want her as a wife...a friend only. YET........she still will not move on. She's still helping him to 'build' his dream and vision in a business he has; trying to 'prove' herself to him as worthy and as the faithful one who always stayed beside him no matter what.

The bastard (I meant what I just said -- every letter and syllable :mad:) could care less about her feelings for him and it just plain ticks me off that she will not move on and get a new life outside of him. Geesh, what wall has to fall on her head. :nono: Ain't that much love in Heaven or hell...surely not in hell.

Nychaelasymone, I cannot tell you how many times this man has hurt her and the tears she's cried over him over the years. He's been with other women -- up in her face. And still, she stands beside him. One of my biggest concerns for her is that she's going to reach retirement age some day and still not have known true love or knowing 'freedom' from this man. It scares me. I mean it scare me to see someone live like this all for a man who does not want her. :sad: :sad: :sad:

So nychaelasymone, I can relate to your frustration here. Your post has caused me to 'vent' too. I think many of us have a friend in this similar situation, where they accept any kind of relationship into their lives when they deserve so much better.

Life is too LONG to be that miserable. Too long. There are too many things in this life to enjoy than to be miserable and stuck in a rut. And there are too many men who are 'straight' and love women and are good men to one woman than to be stuck with one who cannot or will not fulfill us. I know ... :yep:

As for our girlfriends who are lacking self esteem and good judgment, all we can do is pray for them. :nono: *sigh*

Blessings Angel...
 
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Back in the day I went on a few dates with a cross dresser. It was interesting.

Nice guy and all, he was straight but um.. naw, I couldn't get with that after I saw him dressed as a female. (the bad part was that he looked good as one too!)

I guess in a way its to each their own. For some couples this works out fine but for others it just dosen't.

They apparently take precautions to make sure the kids don't know (good thing too) but your friend has some self esteem issues.

Its a sad situation to be sure but there's not a lot that you can do except be her friend through all this.

-A
 
Shimmie said:
I can see how this frustrates you. You have a dear friend that you care about who is messing up her life and she doesn't 'see' it. :sad:

I have a friend who has 'stuck' by a man for over 10 years of her life. He's already made it plain that he doesn't want her as a wife...a friend only. YET........she still will not move on. She's still helping him to 'build' his dream and vision in a business he has; trying to 'prove' herself to him as worthy and as the faithful one who always stayed beside him no matter what.

The bastard (I meant what I just said -- every letter and syllable :mad:) could care less about her feelings for him and it just plain ticks me off that she will not move on and get a new life outside of him. Geesh, what wall has to fall on her head. :nono: Ain't that much love in Heaven or hell...surely not in hell.

Nychaelasymone, I cannot tell you how many times this man has hurt her and the tears she's cried over him over the years. He's been with other women -- up in her face. And still, she stands beside him. One of my biggest concerns for her is that she's going to reach retirement age some day and still not have known true love or knowing 'freedom' from this man. It scares me. I mean it scare me to see someone live like this all for a man who does not want her. :sad: :sad: :sad:

So nychaelasymone, I can relate to your frustration here. Your post has caused me to 'vent' too. I think many of us have a friend in this similar situation, where they accept any kind of relationship into their lives when they deserve so much better.

Life is too LONG to be that miserable. Too long. There are too many things in this life to enjoy than to be miserable and stuck in a rut. And there are too many men who are 'straight' and love women and are good men to one woman than to be stuck with one who cannot or will not fulfill us. I know ... :yep:

As for our girlfriends who are lacking self esteem and good judgment, all we can do is pray for them. :nono: *sigh*

Blessings Angel...
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I can't even pray. It's hard for me to put together the words to form a prayer for her because it hurts me soo bad that she is this way. She is soo nonchalant about everything...she can drop the news that someone died just like it was her child coming home with a straight 'a' report card. She needs help. She attends a church and does not know the meaning of being saved. She continues to find places that support her behavior instead of helping her. I don't want to give up on her but today, right now....I do. I just pray God watcher over her children and they learn what not to do in this life. Shimmie, you are so right.....Blessings to you as well.
 
nychaelasymone said:
I can't even pray. It's hard for me to put together the words to form a prayer for her because it hurts me soo bad that she is this way. She is soo nonchalant about everything...she can drop the news that someone died just like it was her child coming home with a straight 'a' report card. She needs help. She attends a church and does not know the meaning of being saved. She continues to find places that support her behavior instead of helping her. I don't want to give up on her but today, right now....I do. I just pray God watcher over her children and they learn what not to do in this life. Shimmie, you are so right.....Blessings to you as well.
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I've been there with family and friends when it's so frustrating that you don't know how to pray. It can be a wall bashing situation when you see family or friends doing this to themselves. But we each live and learn.

And you know what? People WILL draw to something that validates them and their choices no matter how wrong it may be for them.

I just can't 'see' it. But God can and only He can help them. I will pray for your friend and the man as well. Gee, what a mess, especially with the children involved.

This just makes me all the more, progress with my life and live it to the fullness and even more. Nothing in life is worth self blindness and self inflicting misery. Nothing! :nono:

Take care angel and stay in prayer. I know it angers you to see this; my friend angers me -- she's old enough to know better and to have better; but God allows us to see what's been hidden so that we can pray for those close to us who are in trouble. For no one else cares enough about them to do so.

Stay strong - ya' hear? :lol: Sure you do and you will.........stay strong.

Blessings and hugs... :giveheart:
 
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