So discouraged

[LivinMyLifeLikeItsGolden]

I have been on my HHJ since November 2008. I started off relaxed and then transitioned to natural. I big chopped july 28th of last year and my last relaxer was feb 4th, 2009. my hair has been growing really well and I was so excited to straighten it today and do an official length check....
i started straightening my hair and not only was they breakage left right and center but, my ends were so crunchy and resistant to straightening. It was about 1 inch of damage. I know 1 inch, is only 2 months of progress, but I just feel so down about the situation.
You spend so much time, and money on trying to help your hair be its healthiest..and this is what I end up with.
I feel like I need to step away from the hair game for a bit. Might just throw in some single braids for awhile and let my stupid hair just be.

 

[january noir]

Awwww honey...

It's going to be alright.



Don't give up. It took me 2 years of constant setbacks before I started seeing any progress and then almost another 2 years to show any results of my efforts. It took a long time to find the products and techniques that worked for me. I'm not natural, but I understand. Keep taking care of your hair and it will yield fruits of your labors.

 

[Vonnieluvs08]

LMLLIG, I'm sorry it didn't go so well. Have you trimmed at all since your BC? If you haven't this may have been relaxed/scab hair that broke off.

Your siggie shows you've made serious progress. We all have setbacks in our journey. It will get better.

How is your protein/moisture balance? Porosity?

Just baby your hair. If you need a break take one with the braids.

 

[Nonie]

OK, there, there. Let's look at this. Didn't you just come out of braids? Did you give your hair any DC treatments? Also what's your straightening technique? How did you prepare your hair for your press? (Which BTW, folks, is Nonie's word for straightening, whether it be with a flat iron or hot comb, pressing=ironing=making straight. Just thought I should mention that in case I confuse those who only use the word "press" to mean straightening with a hot comb).

 

[LivinMyLifeLikeItsGolden]

I know I am being a little over the top right now...but thats what consuming yourself with hair does to you I guess. LOL. I know it will be ok... just a year of progress...and getting a haircut is all I have to show for it!

Awwww honey...

It's going to be alright.



Don't give up. It took me 2 years of constant setbacks before I started seeing any progress and then almost another 2 years to show any results of my efforts. It took a long time to find the products and techniques that worked for me. I'm not natural, but I understand. Keep taking care of your hair and it will yield fruits of your labors.

I haven't had a hair cut since my BC. You're right about the scab hair...I should go deal with that situation...I don't really trust anyone to cut my hair, but I need to find someone ASAP, but braids are definitely my first choice till I calm down.

LMLLIG, I'm sorry it didn't go so well. Have you trimmed at all since your BC? If you haven't this may have been relaxed/scab hair that broke off.

Your siggie shows you've made serious progress. We all have setbacks in our journey. It will get better.

How is your protein/moisture balance? Porosity?

Just baby your hair. If you need a break take one with the braids.

I did just come out of some cornrows that I had in for 4 weeks. I am all about the DC so I made sure my hair was deep conditioned and moisturised before straightening it. I don't have the best technique...especially for natural hair I guess. I deep conditioned it today, then rinsed, the used CHI infra treatment, rinsed, towel dried, blow dried on low, then blow dried the hair straight..then i proceeded to flat iron with my new vapor iron which i am also mad at. I gave up after doing about a third because there was just too much breakage.
I know I probably need a good trim and probably just put it away till I have the patience to deal with it

OK, there, there. Let's look at this. Didn't you just come out of braids? Did you give your hair any DC treatments? Also what's your straightening technique? How did you prepare your hair for your press? (Which BTW, folks, is Nonie's word for straightening, whether it be with a flat iron or hot comb, pressing=ironing=making straight. Just thought I should mention that in case I confuse those who only use the word "press" to mean straightening with a hot comb).

 

[Nonie]

Aww...Sweetie, we all learn through mistakes. I am a chicken so the one thing I see you did which I would consider too much is the blowdrying you did before pressing your hair. I think you may have depleted it of moisture so that when you came to press it was crisp and breakage prone. Did you use any heat protectant? I don't know if you were following a particular flat-ironing regimen someone follows or if you just made it up; but if you were following someone's regimen, I would suggest you just PM them and just go over the technique and see if there's a step you missed. I have never heard of a vapor flat iron, so I imagine it further blew moisture out of your hair. What products did you have on your hair? Some products heat up so fast so that even if you iron was not that hot, they absorb and keep the heat and get to burning levels real quick. If you just made up your regimen, do a search for threads on straightening. You can pick up a few tips that could help you; I picked up the one of using heat protectants from one such thread.

I will confess when I did my straightening in April 2009, I didn't really follow anyone's regimen but I was sure I didn't want more heat than necessary on my hair. So I airdried w/o heat, stretching my hair with Curlformers, then I applied heat protectant so carefully making sure my hair was very well coated and passed the iron once. Then one more time after applying a heat protectant serum. That was it. I had learned over years that wet-to-dry presses worked for me and I confirmed they worked for others too. The only thing I had never done was use heat protectants so I was so determined this time around I'd do everything as carefully as possible.

Another thing to consider is if you haven't dusted your ends recently, they're bound to be split and prone to dryness so flatironing just exaggerates that all the more.

 

[coolsista-paris]

don't worry. sorry it came out wrong but it will grow back. Last year i tried straightening my hair, i messed it up (im natural). So even today i see that on the left side of my ead the hair is shorter in the middle. stupid me,i was unpatient and didn't protect it with special product. I felt so bad after having good growth. Well i learnt from my big mistake.

keep taking care of it and be patient. you 'll have that beautiful hair back ;-)

 

[NJoy]

Just wanted to give you this big ol' hug and encourage you to keep moving forward. Setbacks make way for comebacks. And, we're here to support you through it all.

 

[julzinha]

i felt the same way you did! But I was optimistic and was like where do I go from hear. I had to change up my regimen. I've seen your fotki and you have had SOOO MUCH PROGRESS!!! And you have so many amazing products to get your hair back on track. Maybe just cut the damage and from now on baby those ends!

 

[tailormade84]

i understand your frustration and im glad you are getting it all out, but don't stay there - the HHL is like any journey in life - full of hills and valleys, just keep it moving and doing the good you know your hair needs and soon things will be on the up and up

 

[PinkyD]

Its oooooookkkk! Give that lovely mane of yours some TLC, get rid of any un-repairable damage ASAP and move on. You have a gorgeous head of hair, co-sign on NJoy... setbacks make way for comebacks.

 

[MoniintheMiddle]

Nonie has some really good advice OP. In addition to her comment about the heat protectant, do you use a leave in?

 

[HauteHippie]

I'm sorry you're having a rough time. I had a rough time as I neared the end of year one, too. Your ends could be "scab" hair. The hair that I grew out from my last relaxer was "crunchy". No moisturizers really seemed to help. I'm trimming that off on the 13th. Rumor has it that if you trim on a new moon (or full moon) it'll put your hair @ one with nature or something like that. All I heard was, yo' hair is supposed to grow (and I need to cut that hair off anyway).

I WISH that I had thrown in some braids or gotten a full sew-in weave when I got frustrated. Instead I relaxed (it was only on for 5 minutes, but still came out straight). There are always set back, but you're new in the game. 2 months of growth in the whole scheme of things isn't a long time. After I learned what I needed to do with my hair I thought I was ready to go, but I also needed to learn what NOT to do to MY hair. Contrary to what my Gma says, what's good for the geese, ain't always good for the gander. Going a year without a trim cost me, too. So, the more you know what not to do with your hair, the sooner your hair will flourish-- and it will flourish. Give it time. HHG!

 

[shopgalore]

You are a pj and have such great stuff,the others have given you great advice. Dont give up, it will work out, your hair will still grow and mistakes happen the key is to learn from them and move on!

 

[LivinMyLifeLikeItsGolden]

Thanks Nonie! You have been so helpful. I do believe that my hair didn't have enough moisture because once I gave up I put some cream in it and it is back to being soft. I guess I was trying to achieve silky straight natural hair in 1 pass like everyone has been posting abouterplexed
I only sprayed heat protectant, but I think my hair needs alot more moisture. Next time i straighten I am going to keep that in mind. The vapor iron is a new iron joico came out with. it has a resevoir where you add a treatment that is supposed to infuse into your hair as you straighten.
I definitely need a good dusting...it's just the ends that are so dead and dry...I am gonna dust as I braid and get rid of those suckas!! thanks so much for all your help and advice

Aww...Sweetie, we all learn through mistakes. I am a chicken so the one thing I see you did which I would consider too much is the blowdrying you did before pressing your hair. I think you may have depleted it of moisture so that when you came to press it was crisp and breakage prone. Did you use any heat protectant? I don't know if you were following a particular flat-ironing regimen someone follows or if you just made it up; but if you were following someone's regimen, I would suggest you just PM them and just go over the technique and see if there's a step you missed. I have never heard of a vapor flat iron, so I imagine it further blew moisture out of your hair. What products did you have on your hair? Some products heat up so fast so that even if you iron was not that hot, they absorb and keep the heat and get to burning levels real quick. If you just made up your regimen, do a search for threads on straightening. You can pick up a few tips that could help you; I picked up the one of using heat protectants from one such thread.

I will confess when I did my straightening in April 2009, I didn't really follow anyone's regimen but I was sure I didn't want more heat than necessary on my hair. So I airdried w/o heat, stretching my hair with Curlformers, then I applied heat protectant so carefully making sure my hair was very well coated and passed the iron once. Then one more time after applying a heat protectant serum. That was it. I had learned over years that wet-to-dry presses worked for me and I confirmed they worked for others too. The only thing I had never done was use heat protectants so I was so determined this time around I'd do everything as carefully as possible.

Another thing to consider is if you haven't dusted your ends recently, they're bound to be split and prone to dryness so flatironing just exaggerates that all the more.

Thank you for your support. I am gonna keep truckin on...my hair will thank me!!

don't worry. sorry it came out wrong but it will grow back. Last year i tried straightening my hair, i messed it up (im natural). So even today i see that on the left side of my ead the hair is shorter in the middle. stupid me,i was unpatient and didn't protect it with special product. I felt so bad after having good growth. Well i learnt from my big mistake.

keep taking care of it and be patient. you 'll have that beautiful hair back ;-)

Thank you so much for your encouragement

Just wanted to give you this big ol' hug and encourage you to keep moving forward. Setbacks make way for comebacks. And, we're here to support you through it all.

I am gonna do a good dusting, put my hair in some braids and let it regain some of its length. Thanks for the encouragement

i felt the same way you did! But I was optimistic and was like where do I go from hear. I had to change up my regimen. I've seen your fotki and you have had SOOO MUCH PROGRESS!!! And you have so many amazing products to get your hair back on track. Maybe just cut the damage and from now on baby those ends!

Thank you! I am feeling better...ready to climb the next hill..Thanks for your encouragment

i understand your frustration and im glad you are getting it all out, but don't stay there - the HHL is like any journey in life - full of hills and valleys, just keep it moving and doing the good you know your hair needs and soon things will be on the up and up

Thank you!! Gonna put my hair in braids and give it some TLC..and a break!!!

Its oooooookkkk! Give that lovely mane of yours some TLC, get rid of any un-repairable damage ASAP and move on. You have a gorgeous head of hair, co-sign on NJoy... setbacks make way for comebacks.

I usually use a leave in, but this time I just used a heat protectant...big mistake I guess. I put a leave-in in my hair afterwards and it definitely softened up. Thank you for you encouragement!

Nonie has some really good advice OP. In addition to her comment about the heat protectant, do you use a leave in?

I am thinking its the damn scab hair. Gonna dust as I braid it and hopefully regain most of the length by the time the braids are out . thank you for your encouragment!!

I'm sorry you're having a rough time. I had a rough time as I neared the end of year one, too. Your ends could be "scab" hair. The hair that I grew out from my last relaxer was "crunchy". No moisturizers really seemed to help. I'm trimming that off on the 13th. Rumor has it that if you trim on a new moon (or full moon) it'll put your hair @ one with nature or something like that. All I heard was, yo' hair is supposed to grow (and I need to cut that hair off anyway).

I WISH that I had thrown in some braids or gotten a full sew-in weave when I got frustrated. Instead I relaxed (it was only on for 5 minutes, but still came out straight). There are always set back, but you're new in the game. 2 months of growth in the whole scheme of things isn't a long time. After I learned what I needed to do with my hair I thought I was ready to go, but I also needed to learn what NOT to do to MY hair. Contrary to what my Gma says, what's good for the geese, ain't always good for the gander. Going a year without a trim cost me, too. So, the more you know what not to do with your hair, the sooner your hair will flourish-- and it will flourish. Give it time. HHG!

I am a PJ...but this has ended my PJ streak...I think...I am just going to focus on healthy hair practices instead of hair products since I have enough products to get me through any crisis Not gonna give up anymore. Thanks for your encouragment

You are a pj and have such great stuff,the others have given you great advice. Dont give up, it will work out, your hair will still grow and mistakes happen the key is to learn from them and move on!

 

[BlkOnyx488]

I know exactly how you feel
I felt the same way
and basically I came to the same conclusion. I lost and inch in breakage, then i had to cut an inch off.

I decided to keep my hair cornrowed and out of the harmful elements like cold air and indoor heat.

So I basically baggie my cornrows around the clock. after the shock and sadness, came exceptance and promise to keep moving forword with a smile. I know it's tough going, all I can say is hang in there. I think if we keep plugging away making changes when needed we will make our goals. and have long healthy beautiful hair!

And become an incredible story!

 

[LivinMyLifeLikeItsGolden]

Yah!! I figure at this point, protective styling is my best option till at least summer. I am putting in single braids right now. I think once I vented then got my thoughts together it was alot easier to keep going. Thanks for your support and encouragement

I know exactly how you feel
I felt the same way
and basically I came to the same conclusion. I lost and inch in breakage, then i had to cut an inch off.

I decided to keep my hair cornrowed and out of the harmful elements like cold air and indoor heat.

So I basically baggie my cornrows around the clock. after the shock and sadness, came exceptance and promise to keep moving forword with a smile. I know it's tough going, all I can say is hang in there. I think if we keep plugging away making changes when needed we will make our goals. and have long healthy beautiful hair!

And become an incredible story!