Should I be offended.........

[Shana']

So my neighbor came over to chill with me for a minute and our conversation turned to hair care. She offered to do my hair for me although I didn't ask. I joined this site to learn how to care for my own hair and I took offense to her suggestion. Now her hair if you are wondering is a reddish/orangey color and she normally wears a doobie. Also her ends look damaged. Our hair is the same length except my hair is a little thicker. My SO said I may be overreacting b/c I am trying to become a DIYer and kind of sensitive about my skills. But I'm not sensitive, I just don't want her hands in my hair!!! She has offered many times in the past b/c her friends let her do their hair. What do you all think? Was she trying to be funny or am I sensitive?

 

[Amber_moon]

I think you may be over reacting... she might just want to play in it... last time I checked that was a compliment.

 

[longhairluva]

So my neighbor came over to chill with me for a minute and our conversation turned to hair care. She offered to do my hair for me although I didn't ask. I joined this site to learn how to care for my own hair and I took offense to her suggestion. Now her hair if you are wondering is a reddish/orangey color and she normally wears a doobie. Also her ends look damaged. Our hair is the same length except my hair is a little thicker. My SO said I may be overreacting b/c I am trying to become a DIYer and kind of sensitive about my skills. But I'm not sensitive, I just don't want her hands in my hair!!! She has offered many times in the past b/c her friends let her do their hair. What do you all think? Was she trying to be funny or am I sensitive?

You're being sensitive. I didn't see anything offensive. Next time just tell her you don't let anyone do your hair.

 

[iasade]

So my neighbor came over to chill with me for a minute and our conversation turned to hair care. She offered to do my hair for me although I didn't ask. I joined this site to learn how to care for my own hair and I took offense to her suggestion. Now her hair if you are wondering is a reddish/orangey color and she normally wears a doobie. Also her ends look damaged. Our hair is the same length except my hair is a little thicker. My SO said I may be overreacting b/c I am trying to become a DIYer and kind of sensitive about my skills. But I'm not sensitive, I just don't want her hands in my hair!!! She has offered many times in the past b/c her friends let her do their hair. What do you all think? Was she trying to be funny or am I sensitive?

Seems like she is used to people letting her do their hair and just wanted to do yours as well, since you and her chilled together. I think it may have been harmless.

 

[RegaLady]

People offer, but leave it at that! Some people just have that, "Wow, what I can do in her hair", thing going on. It's you! If your hair was that bad, she wouldn't want to mess with it!

 

[LadyKaypnyc]

Yeah, She may just like your hair. I do that sometimes. When I admire someone's hair, my hands itch to style it, Don't take offense

 

[Shana']

Well thanks ladies. Taking a step back I can see that I took her offer the wrong way. Overall she's a cool chick so I believe I may be a little sensitive. Initially I thought she was being funny b/c she's asked about 3 before and I always say no but never explained why. If it happens again I will give her my reasons and ask that she drop the subject.

 

[Blessed_Angel]

I don't think you're overreacting at all. I think you're just sensing some hateration (aka jealousy).

If she spent more time in her own hair, than in everyone else's; she'd be able to see how much work her hair needs. She just wants to feel good about being able to do "something". Tell her to start with her own head of hair! I had a neighbor like that too. I paid her no mind. She had hair shorter than my fingers, and was trying to give me advice! Chick please!

 

[Platinum]

I would be offended that someone with hair that's in worse shape than mine would offer to do my hair. Why? So mine can look like that too?erplexed Not cool...

 

[hopeful]

Well thanks ladies. Taking a step back I can see that I took her offer the wrong way. Overall she's a cool chick so I believe I may be a little sensitive. Initially I thought she was being funny b/c she's asked about 3 before and I always say no but never explained why. If it happens again I will give her my reasons and ask that she drop the subject.

I don't think you should feel obligated to explain why to her. After 3 times you would think she'd just leave the whole subject alone. A grown woman should not keep asking another grown woman if she can do her hair, that's just silly.

 

[Shana']

When she came over this morning, I had my hair in rollers airdrying. She asked me if I was airdrying as if that was weird or a foreign concept. I don't feel that I should have to explain why I don't want her hands in my hair but I do need to let her know that she is dancing on my last good christian nerve with the requests.

 

[Foxglove]

She was probably trying to get more business. I wouldn't take offense, just politely decline

 

[Shana']

She was probably trying to get more business. I wouldn't take offense, just politely decline

But she's a kitchen beautician.............

 

[gymfreak336]

I think you are overreacting.

 

[LadyKaypnyc]

I don't think you should feel obligated to explain why to her. After 3 times you would think she'd just leave the whole subject alone. A grown woman should not keep asking another grown woman if she can do her hair, that's just silly.

ITA

She asked you 3 times? Ridiculous, I would be offended too,

 

[CurlyMoo]

Sounds like she is just trying to relate with you. I know I am sensitive about offers to do my hair as I have been abruptly offered "help" by so called hairdressers to do my hair after they notice that my hair is natural. They just assume that I don't do anything with it.

 

[JustKiya]

I don't think you should feel obligated to explain why to her. After 3 times you would think she'd just leave the whole subject alone. A grown woman should not keep asking another grown woman if she can do her hair, that's just silly.

I love playing in hair, so I can definitely understand her asking.

3 times though?? That's - that's - that's strange. After the first no, I would get it. Even if I asked a second time, thinking we had gotten closer, and you had a thing about 'strangers' touching your hair, I would have left it alone.

A third time? That's right prying.

I wouldn't have been offended, but I might have said something a lil sharp.

 

[Shana']

I tend to have a delayed reaction at times which is why I didn't say more than no. I have a huge trust issue with people in my hair but when I need help, I ask. I will have to sit her down when I get the chance and nip this in the bud once and for all.

 

[LadyKaypnyc]

You're being sensitive. I didn't see anything offensive. Next time just tell her you don't let anyone do your hair.

COMPLETELY OT....



Longhairluva, Your siggy is hilarious!

 

[NikStarrr]

She was probably trying to get more business. I wouldn't take offense, just politely decline

I agree. I mean, did she ask 3 times in like the same week? lol

 

[Shana']

I agree. I mean, did she ask 3 times in like the same week? lol

LOL!! No over the last month or so. My SO pointed out that I have been wearing my hair in a bun lately so maybe she thought I needed an extra set of hands or was unsure of what to do to my hair.

 

[hothair]

no i I like to mess in people's hair but only offer if i think ur hair's lush, busted hair gets no love from me

 

[HoneyA]

I don't think you should be offended. She asks if she could do your hair. You don't want her too and plus her hair looks bad, so you say no thank you, I do it myself and leave it at that.

 

[hopeful]

LOL!! No over the last month or so. My SO pointed out that I have been wearing my hair in a bun lately so maybe she thought I needed an extra set of hands or was unsure of what to do to my hair.

How can a bun mean you need help with your hair or are unsure? Please update us once you nip it in the bud. She ain't even asking me and she is getting on my last nerve too.

 

[NYAmicas]

I wouldn't be offended....I wish someone would offer to do my hair at times. Most times they're heading for the border rather than dig in this mop.
Now there's a difference with someone asking and someone asking to do your hair-only you know whether she was trying to be rude.

 

[Shana']

How can a bun mean you need help with your hair or are unsure? Please update us once you nip it in the bud. She ain't even asking me and she is getting on my last nerve too.

Lol!!! You know how when you're having a bad hair day, you throw your hair in a ponytail, under a wig or under a scarf, she may have thought I was having a bad hair week or something. I won't see her until Friday so I'll update then.

 

[Christa438]

She thinks your hair is healthy and beautiful, but she thinks you lack something--style, lol. so she keeps offering to style it for you. At the same time, she is also getting on my nerves with her offering all the time after you keep declining. She reminds me of a dude who use to ask me to be his girlfriend EVERY week, and EVERY week I said NO. He made me laugh sometimes, but I was also like ohwell:. She must think you will change your mind, let her know that you wont.