Sex on first date

Okay as I thought f*cking on the first date is "clutch ur pearls" worthy for most. Soooooo when do u usually have sex with a guy? And please none of that "when I get to know him", "when we both have connected emotionally" "when we go get test results" Average time frame of when u usually end up sleeping with someone please?
 
Never with the intentions of having more, but my only "long-term" relationship started off that way. Waited 6 months with one guy and that ended a week after. I think my examples are probably the exception though, not the rule.
 
tru4reele said:
Okay as I thought f*cking on the first date is "clutch ur pearls" worthy for most. Soooooo when do u usually have sex with a guy? And please none of that "when I get to know him", "when we both have connected emotionally" "when we go get test results" Average time frame of when u usually end up sleeping with someone please?
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Ok how bout you answer a few questions, why are you so curious to know the time frame for sex? Do you have a time frame? I ask because I know you won't get a definitive answer here. There isn't one. There are very few relationship rules that work for everyone all the time. The decision to have sex has to come from the individual, period. So if someone says "when the time is right" that's what it is.
 
Because what if u feel that first or second date is right? Peopl will still judge. I just think it's a double standard when people say when the time is right.
 
I'm 26 and never slept with anyone. I don't do everything but Crap either. I just don't run into very many guys I actually like and even if I did I won't be doing that I believe in waiting until after marriage. I'm no longer judging women who do that it's not my place to judge and I know being a virgin won't get me into heaven. I just feel sort of upset a lot of women are getting married and they are having sex on the first date, third, or eleventh date and here I am waiting and I still haven't had my first boyfriend yet and I have absolutely no prospects. I can count the number of actual dates I've been on in the last 5 years on two hands. Even though it seems like I passed out my number to a lot of guys. That is what makes me kind of sad.
 
^^^Where do u usually meet men? I'm guessing u don't go out cause u said u don't do crap. Where have u met the ones u give ur number to?
 
tru4reele said:
^^^Where do u usually meet men? I'm guessing u don't go out cause u said u don't do crap. Where have u met the ones u give ur number to?
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Where do I usually meet men? there is no usually. It happens rarely. The ones I've met lately it has been when I left town travel to a different state or country. I had on a bikini when I met them so they don't count. When I said I don't do crap I meant I'm not an everything but penetration virgin. I'm 100%. I go out a lot and do a lot of things when I am not tired.
 
I have done this it didn't work out but we are great friends. After that i waited. I don't think a woman is a heaux for doing it either. Nor does it effect every man's judgement of you. Certain things(like one time incidents) should not define who you are but how you carry yourself overall should, IMO.

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Not a good idea if you are looking for something serious or long-term. But perfect if you have no intention of seeing or hearing from the guy ever again. Honestly, if I have sex too soon in a relationship, I dump the guy and look for someone with more long-term potential.
 
tru4reele said:
Because what if u feel that first or second date is right? Peopl will still judge. I just think it's a double standard when people say when the time is right.
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What people?? Oh you mean the people you tell your personal business to? Well there's your problem right there.

If "when the time is right" isn't a good time to have sex what is? When the rule book tells you?
 
tru4reele said:
Unless u actually go to a clinic with someone and see their results u don't know people's status. So rather u wait months or years to have sex, the STD thing is irrelevant unless u u do this. But yea condoms were invented for a reason and I bet ALL of u ladies that are talking about STD's are not going to the doctor with every man before sex. People get married and find out their partner has disease. Just because someone may wine and dine u for weeks or months doesn't make them clean.
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True. But it does give a woman enough time to talk to him about getting tested together.

tru4reele said:
Because what if u feel that first or second date is right? Peopl will still judge. I just think it's a double standard when people say when the time is right.
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I'm not being funny. But did someone judge you?

For me, I never had sex on the first date.

I always thought it sounded fun and wild, but I knew too many women get hurt, unplanned pregnancy (than abortion) and hurrying up to get "tested." These things sort of killed the fantasy.
 
It all depends on both of you! It has nothing to do with having sex on your first date or having sex on your 100th date or even waiting until you get married! Besides, some men are very patient so they can deceive you into believing that he is good enough for you! Come on we are in a different world and century! In fact why not have sex with him if you really like him and see if he will still stay?! 3 years ago i had sex with my man on our first date and we are still together with respect and love.
 
To the OP, you guys started out as friends so I'm sure if he loved you as a friend he wouldn't leave after having sex. Now I would a imagine having sex on the first night with someone you didn't know that well would lead to different results.
 
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I'm never interested in a man enough to WANT to on the first date even if he's drop dead handsome. Every man I ended up caring deeply for, I never fell for on the 1st date.
But I don't think it's wrong to do *shrug* I'm not sure if it ruins a possible long term relationship or exposes the guy who wasn't ready to begin with.
The jury is still out on that one.
 
I wont say if it is right or wrong. I will say you don't know where life will take you. I think many women don't do it because they are afraid of being judged. What I hear from men is, things happen and if they liked you before they will like you after. I think some women think that waiting will change how men think of you, but it wont. If a man just wanted sex that won't change with time. I say don't make sex on the first date a habit because that is just asking for drama. On the other hand I know a couple of people who slept together on the first date, or just randomly who ended up being together. But they didn't think sex mean't something in their relationship. Once they put their clothes on they took the time to get to know they person.

I also agree with not telling people you business.
 
If the chemistry's there and you feel an emotional connection I don't see why not.

And even then if you have an itch that needs to be scratched i still don't see why not. As long as you can handle the fallout of whatever comes to pass afterwards. Go for it.

Me personally, the connection is essential, even if it is a temporary thing.
 
CurlyMoo said:
Not a good idea if you are looking for something serious or long-term. But perfect if you have no intention of seeing or hearing from the guy ever again. Honestly, if I have sex too soon in a relationship, I dump the guy and look for someone with more long-term potential.
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Me too :look:

On the flip side, there was a man that chased me for 2 years before I got married. So we did the do...and he vanished after that 1 time. Some men are just predatory to begin with.

My friend slept with her DH on the first date and they've been married 12 years now.

My other friend slept with her DH on the first date and they've been married 8 years now.

I slept with a guy on the first date and after 3 months he proposed. I wasn't ready for all that so it eventually ended.

Seems to be the luck of draw.
 
Do it when you are ready and not a minute before...whether it be the first date or the 200th...just wrap it up :look:

I catch feelings though so I ain't about that life and would be blowing up dudes phone cursing him out if he don't call back so I couldn't do it but I don't judge those that do...long as you don't have first date sex every night of the week for a month or something...that is kinda super trif then...:look:
 
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I just saw this and thought if this thread....

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Before I say something, if a woman chooses to sleep with a man on the first night, that doesn't make her a whore. A woman's sexual choices, whether she's had a 100 partners or is a virgin, should be a reflection of them and not influenced by a man or anyone else except God. However, some men will not deal with a woman who wants to wait longer if they are used to having sex sooner. Just like some men will not deal with a woman they slept with quickly if they judge women by their sexuality. It all depends.
 
I learned to never say never . But I don't think anybody could have me feeling them so much that I would need to sleep with them on the first date.
 
halocj said:
I learned to never say never . But I don't think anybody could have me feeling them so much that I would need to sleep with them on the first date.
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Maybe you've never experienced that type of chemistry.

I've had a lot of first dates, but that type of sexual chemistry only happenend to me once and I don't regret following through.
 
keyawarren said:
Maybe you've never experienced that type of chemistry.

I've had a lot of first dates, but that type of sexual chemistry only happenend to me once and I don't regret following through.
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LOL! I've had 2 dates like this... like ridiculously strong chemistry. One I was tipsy the other I was fully sober and had to go home and take a shower. Even when I spoke to him on the phone I'd be OPEN!
 
Britt said:
LOL! I've had 2 dates like this... like ridiculously strong chemistry. One I was tipsy the other I was fully sober and had to go home and take a shower. Even when I spoke to him on the phone I'd be OPEN!
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There's a guy I know who makes my toes curl when we're just chatting about anything. Smh.
It's the one and only guy I've ever had insane chemistry with. I'm glad that showers work for you, I have yet to figure how to "calm it down" w/o actually having sex, lol.
 
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