This thread will answer your question(s) this is one of the threads I've used as a guide for my relaxer regimen.
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=93398
Personally, the last time I did a relaxer(I used ORS) I did the following after relaxer was rinsed out:
-conditioned with Aphogee 2 min Intensive Keratin Reconstructor for 5 mins
-Rinse conditioner
-neutralize with ORS Creamy Aloe shampoo
-deep condition with replenishing pack for 15 min w/heat
-then deep conditioned with moisturizing conditioner for 45min(Mixture of Silicon Mix, Miss Key 10 en 1, Emergenica, Honey and olive oil)
-rinse and then put in leave-in(Lacio Lacio & Salerm 21 mix) conditioner
-then set hair (rollerset or plaits/braids).
Personally, I think I did tooo much and I won't do all that again. I would've omitted the replenishing pack since it has protien in it and so did the reconstructor in addition to some of my more moisturizing cons. My hair felt it too(it felt kinda hard)
. I had to wash my hair again the next day to get if feeling normal again. Next time I plan to use profectiv relaxer and do the Aphogee reconstructor before neutralizing and then use a true moisturizing deep conditioner with no protein whatsoever in it (most likely Nacidit Avocado Cream Con and Aloe Vera Con) after the neutralizing step.