POF Experience: Advice needed...

AnjelLuvs

AnjelLuvs

Well-Known Member
Okay so I am taking @yardyspice advice... I have a question about my experience with Plenty of Fish... Or maybe I just want others thoughts, as this is first communication through this site...

So I met this guy online, gave number, we been going back and forth over text about meeting up, its been like 2 wks come Friday... no hasn't called, I broke one of rules by calling once, because tired of the texting...

so anyways yesterday I am like lets do Applebees in Harlem as it is convenient, not costly, etc...

1. Homey was like nah I was thinking somewhere more downtown, so we both can be outta our comfort zones... I am like I don't chill in Harlem eva, and hardly shop there, he was like still thats your hood... I was like so you want to take me outta comfort zone he was like yes... ummm ok...

He asks where I live... I give him an close train station area, say 155 and 8th right(example), ya know to play it safe... He is like holler when you get back.. I said ok...

Then, I told homie that I would get back to him once I got back from BK to solidify plans, as I had to drop something off to my aunt, and that I would be back around 7:30 ish... i didn't get back till like 8;30ish... he didn't call but blow up I mean blow up phone with texts...

homie is like I am over by 155th and 8th, :perplexed... you still want to do something... I am thinkin in my head why the freak you over... I am like nah.. I was thinking we would meet up at place which wasnt even chosen by him at this point, just was like downtown...

I am concerned about going forward with dude, thoughts...
 
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So...he says he wanted you guys to first meet somewhere that's not in either of your guys comfort zone yet he pulls a "drive by" to the subway station you gave him? Not sure what to make of that, but I'd say red flag for sure. Something don't quite sound right with this one.
 
AnjelLuvsUBabe, forget him, you should want someone that is looking forward to meeting you.

I do have a question for you though, how long have you been on POF and what are the guys like besides the one you posted :look:? I'm thinking about taking the plung and setting up an account :crazy:.
 
In the future, you should only take guys seriously that use your phone number to call and schedule a meetup/date, not text back and forth for weeks on end. Also, a man should be willing to meet you wherever is convenient for YOU. Two weeks of texting with no real effort on his part to meet you is a sign that he's just not that interested or he's immature. I'm currently on POF and every guy that I've exchanged phone numbers with has wanted to schedule a date with me ASAP.
 
Thanks ladies for advice! You guys are correct. The texts were meaningless at that... I suggested to him lets grab some coffee and nothing... I will KIM... :grin:
 
Love Always, I re-joined for a friend, so we could do it together and share stories, she has since deleted account... I have another friend who just got married from dating a guy from site...

So far, havent been on it like that proactively... I was contacted by this guy and was one that gave number too... But I will keep with site, and get more serious about the prospects
 
I met a guy on POF once who wanted to just text. Weird guy. I kicked him to the curb and married someone who I also met on POF.
 
That dude doesn't sound like someone you would want to start something with.

I was on POF for all of 6 days. It's been a month now since I've been dating this guy that I met on there. We messaged each other on the site then exchanged numbers. It was during the weekend so we spoke most of Saturday and made plans to meet on Sunday for lunch at a location that was half way for the both of us. We live an hour away from each other.

So far he's been great. A real gentleman, funny and affectionate. It's also great that he's never been married and has no kids.
 
I think your mistake was not speaking to him on the phone. LHCF always talk about texting is a no no and I don't agree with that. But before you take the plunge to meet someone you met online, phone conversations can reveal a lot more other than texting and e-mail.
 
Love Always said:
@AnjelLuvsUBabe, forget him, you should want someone that is looking forward to meeting you.

I do have a question for you though, how long have you been on POF and what are the guys like besides the one you posted :look:? I'm thinking about taking the plung and setting up an account :crazy:.
Click to expand...

You should...I just set one up a couple of days ago and of course it's plenty coming for now :lachen: but I love the settings that they have where you can list requirements for sending you a message. That's helps me weed out some of the chumps. Honestly I've had some really nice guys message me and we've talked on the phone.

The one thing I will say is get a google voice number set up and you can use that one to give out instead of your real phone number. This is what I do and I make it known in the first response that I DO NOT text to get to know someone. If you want to know more about me (after a few messages of course) then you need to pick up and call me. If not...BYE.

I'm getting better at this :grin:
 
Keen said:
I think your mistake was not speaking to him on the phone. LHCF always talk about texting is a no no and I don't agree with that. But before you take the plunge to meet someone you met online, phone conversations can reveal a lot more other than texting and e-mail.
Click to expand...


THIS..I didn't make it down to read your post before replying but I've definitely learned from the past. If a man is truly interested then he shouldn't have a problem calling. Nobody is THAT busy. If they are, then they shouldn't be trying to date.
 
brownelovely, thanks for the advice girl. I've been doing a little searching on that site already :look:. I do notice that there is a plethora of black men on there so that's why I want to give it a shot. I know there will be a lot of weeding out though but that comes with the territory.
 
@brownelovely, the thing is I do have a Google voice account, but got to be a lil too much keeping track of... :perplexed... going forward I will learn to make it work...
 
brownlovely, ok I have a Blackberry, so I have to download app, and when I got texts, didn't notice, as there is no sound or vibration... Have to always look to see if phone blinking, in some cases it wouldn't and/ or a message indictator on screen of phone... i never got calls, although guy said he called me several times... :perplexed
 
AnjelLuvsUBabe said:
@brownlovely, ok I have a Blackberry, so I have to download app, and when I got texts, didn't notice, as there is no sound or vibration... Have to always look to see if phone blinking, in some cases it wouldn't and/ or a message indictator on screen of phone... i never got calls, although guy said he called me several times... :perplexed
Click to expand...

Ook..gotcha. I have to refresh on my phone to so I get what you're saying. I have the calls go to my land line so I haven't had any problems with calls not coming through. That might be the difference.

I'm a heavy texter so the refreshing doesn't bother me too much but I get your point that it can be annoying. Maybe you can use it for a while with each guy and then decipher who can get your real number and make it easy.
 
Why would a MAN want you to..... as he puts it "be out of your comfort zone"?

Something is very OFF - a gentlemen would arrange the first date so it is easy and comfortable (time, location, event, etc) for the woman.

I bet this dude was also not planning to pay :/
 
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