OMG!!! YA'LL!!! will.not.believe.this!!!!

stormy07

stormy07

Active Member
Jesus take the wheel!!!!! one of my residents has her granddaughter living with her...very polite, well mannered, beautiful young lady.... from what her grandma says she has some self esteem issues she doesn't think she's pretty... She just turned 12 a couple weeks ago....so why did she come down today with a shiny head full of freshly relaxed hair....that she did HERSELF!!! :blush::blush:We actually called her grandma to confirm that she actually did the relaxer herself... A 12 year old self relaxed herself....:perplexed I'm flabbergasted....
 
stormy07 said:
Jesus take the wheel!!!!! one of my residents has her granddaughter living with her...very polite, well mannered, beautiful young lady.... from what her grandma says she has some self esteem issues she doesn't think she's pretty... She just turned 12 a couple weeks ago....so why did she come down today with a shiny head full of freshly relaxed hair....that she did HERSELF!!! :blush::blush:We actually called her grandma to confirm that she actually did the relaxer herself... A 12 year old self relaxed herself....:perplexed I'm flabbergasted....
Click to expand...

Her hair was full and shiny? I'm impressed.

That 12 year old is going to become a great hairdresser. I mean there are grown a$$ women who burn people's hair off with that 'ish.
 
shiny, but her ends are dry you can tell, she's about APL but I can remember a couple years ago when her hair was braided all the time she was btween BSL and MBL...
 
nagawa said:
Hopefully she can maintain it.

When I was relaxed, it never looked that bad at first...
Click to expand...


my thoughts exactly...she just got done with it last nite so it looks nice now but if she can keep it up is another story.... and I know she burned her scalp cuz when my boss had her hands up in her hair I could see her wincing a little bit
 
Wow she has alot of self confidence to relax herself at such a young age!:up:
I always got soo anxious and afraid I'd overlap:ohwell:--anyways, good for her :yep:
 
At 12 she probably lurks here. If she did a great job I would not be surprised. My niece is 9 and she can research anything and does, she is very savvy and so are her friends.
 
she doesn't have her own computer...and she's still kinda flighty as far as sitting and reading stuff so I'll just have to try to help her out...though I get the impression that she's still confused...cuz she said she wishes she was natural and had long hair BUT she doesn't like the poofiness so she "has to perm it"
 
She should go to the library and just sit and surf this site. Seeing all the photos might inspire her to truly take and interest. I would hate to hear that she goes from a MBL healthy to a NL damaged head. Does her Grandma seem to know about hair?
 
Yeah, because a relaxer is really gonna help her with her self esteem issues. If anything it's just masking it.:nono:

I don't care what anyone says, a child shouldn't be handling caustic chemicals at such a young age. It's a shame she may feel that a relaxer will solve all her beauty problems. :sad: Bottom line:

This isn't cute.

This isn't funny.

This isn't cool.

And this certainty isn't a healthy way of growing up.
 
Honestly I learned how to perm my own hair when I was 10 I didn't start having problems with my relaxers breaking my hair off until I started going to salons and having them do my perms.
 
Was she natural before and this was her first relaxer ever?
Well, at 12 I hope she can maintain it :ohwell:
But yeah...self-relaxing at 12 is a little off *shrug*
 
Hmmm...I might have been that young when I relaxed my hair myself, lol! I know I dyed it then...

But...that's kind of sad that she relaxed her hair due to low self esteem. Especially if she can't maintain it and her hair starts going haywire on her. Like others said, please help her keep her hair looking good or her self esteem will get even lower. :( Aw, I'm sad now.
 
If you can see that her ends are dry please let her know what she needs to do in order to rescue them. That's the only way she's going to be able to keep her hair.
 
Not surprised at all. I started putting in my own relaxer when I was 10 years old. I had to or else it was afro city (again) for me. And I hated wearing a fro :sad:
 
wait i'm confused?? she's twelve not five....and i didnt read anything in the OP that stated her hair had anything to do with her self esteem unless i missed the subtle reference. I have dry ends all the time, that doesnt mean i dont know hair care it just means i was too lazy that day to take care of it. I had plenty of PROFESSIONALS burn my scalp. ppl are acting like shes slitting her wrists???
 
I starting relaxing my own hair at twelve. I just read the directions, followed the instructions and used the two wall mirrors in my bathroom to see the back of my head.
 
I started relaxing my hair at a young age too.
It had a lot to do with self esteem. I thought kinky hair was "nappy and ugly" and i wanted long silky hair like the women in magazines and music videos.
The OP said something about her having low self esteem. Im not sure if her hair is related to it but if you can think back to when you were 12 im sure hair played some part in your issues along with your body and boys.
I just hope she is able to maintain her hair and some how finds some sort of self esteem. Poor child.
 
MilkChocolateOne said:
I starting relaxing my own hair at twelve. I just read the directions, followed the instructions and used the two wall mirrors in my bathroom to see the back of my head.
Click to expand...

Lots of 12 year olds do their own hair even without the mirror set up. I still don't have a mirror set up although I really need to get one. I could do my own hair at the age of 10 or 11 - this did not include relaxers coz that wasn't in my vocabulary back then but if it was who knows. Many kids that age flat iron and/or curl their own hair. I don't know if I'd point a 12 year old in the direction of a hair board. If they're doing it on their own I suppose you can't stop them of course but how's a 12 year old going to handle bandwagons and product junkism assuming she has no money? It's easy enough to do simple things like keep your hair moisturized and detangle carefully which is all I was told as a child long before hair boards. As far as I'm concerned this is grown folks recreation, best enjoyed when you have discretionary income. jmho.
 
Where is the OP?
Is this more about what age we are able to do our hair or the fact that her self esteem may have come into play which led her to relax? Or possibly both?
If the girl can do her hair fine but if it was some self esteem issue as yoshi said the relaxer is just going to mask the issues really at hand. I suffered from an eating disorder and thinking my hair was nappy. So I got a relaxer and had silky hair and stuck my finger down my throat to throw up my meals. The relaxer didnt help anything. This is why im asking what the issue really about her age or her self esteem?

OP please elaborate.

Sorry for all the info that may be to much but im really concerned for her.
 
I think it's awesome that she can take care of her hair. In japan, girls learn to care(beauty) for themselves when they are about 11. Awesome.
 
I hope you'll be able to talk to her and make sure she knows the importance of making sure all the relaxer is rinsed out.
Not switching relaxer brands frequently.
Waiting a minimum of 6 weeks between relaxers ( try to teach her longer)

And deep conditioning her hair with a shower cap on Weekly.
 
L.Brown1114 said:
wait i'm confused?? she's twelve not five....and i didnt read anything in the OP that stated her hair had anything to do with her self esteem unless i missed the subtle reference. I have dry ends all the time, that doesnt mean i dont know hair care it just means i was too lazy that day to take care of it. I had plenty of PROFESSIONALS burn my scalp. ppl are acting like shes slitting her wrists???
Click to expand...

THANK YOU. Please let's not make this into the newest drama on this board.

Her self-esteem issues could do with anything, the OP never specified hair. Still, if relaxing her hair did make her feel better the emphasis should definitely be on making sure she has the tools to care for her hair and maintain it.

I'm impressed with her (we have plenty of grown women here who know how tough self-relaxing is) for being able to sit and do it well. As for burning her scalp, I still burn mine on occassion and I base like crazy. I think the OP could probably help her out with that.

All in all I feel like this is a great opportunity to start a HHJ at a young age and when she's grown she'll be known the world over for being fairy-tale length, lol.
 
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