Kurlee
Well-Known Member
It makes me sad for our people after all this time, and the information available, we stick to these stereotypes. It's like no matter what shows us different we refuse to evolve
OMG! Light-skinned & have long hair dosen't count?!
- Thread starter bermudabeauty
- Start date
divya
Well-Known Member
I’ve always known that the length and health of hair depends on how a person cares for their hair. It’s about learning to care for your own hair. It was strange to me growing up when people would be surprised to see my dark skin and long hair, as though it was something impossible. Regardless of being mixed, that people assumed that one had to have mixture in order to have long hair seemed very strange as well.
People also would be surprised that I was dark with curly hair. When younger, I would think “what’s wrong with them?” One African-American friend of my mother married a Puerto Rican man, and could not understand why my hair was much longer and looser than her daughter. Guess I was darker so it was even stranger for her. She also failed to realize that my father’s hair was straighter than her husband’s hair. My father is dark as well, but mostly East Indian (not that EI hair doesn't vary either). For her, light skin was supposed to mean looser hair regardless.
Honestly, for a long time, I attributed it to American society more than anything. I was much more comfortable being around West Indians, especially Trinidadian and Guyanese, because no one asked me those stupid questions. People just knew that complexion did not determine hair length. However, over time I learned about the mis-education of people of African descent and people of color in general. Every group has its issues, and you are bound to find certain issues amongst all of us - regardless of the degree.
Each one has to teach one now. Bermuda, I'm glad that you set the record straight...
People also would be surprised that I was dark with curly hair. When younger, I would think “what’s wrong with them?” One African-American friend of my mother married a Puerto Rican man, and could not understand why my hair was much longer and looser than her daughter. Guess I was darker so it was even stranger for her. She also failed to realize that my father’s hair was straighter than her husband’s hair. My father is dark as well, but mostly East Indian (not that EI hair doesn't vary either). For her, light skin was supposed to mean looser hair regardless.
Honestly, for a long time, I attributed it to American society more than anything. I was much more comfortable being around West Indians, especially Trinidadian and Guyanese, because no one asked me those stupid questions. People just knew that complexion did not determine hair length. However, over time I learned about the mis-education of people of African descent and people of color in general. Every group has its issues, and you are bound to find certain issues amongst all of us - regardless of the degree.
Each one has to teach one now. Bermuda, I'm glad that you set the record straight...
locabouthair
Well-Known Member
BeautifulNameX
Active Member
YEA I show my friends the they say those ladies arent full black. Their hair is soo straight. Im like its called a relaxer stupid and flat iron. And if she dark skinned they say she must be indian.
"But their no full black people"
Im thinking what is full black too bad black is a color not nationality orgin. . . . And name me one person thats full anything.
"But their no full black people"
Im thinking what is full black too bad black is a color not nationality orgin. . . . And name me one person thats full anything.
mxdchiq86
New Member
thank you. i am mixed with 3a/3b hair and i have never been past BSL.. and when i was at BSL, it was very damaged BSL. a lot of my african american friends, growing up, always had longer hair than me. it sucks that when/if i do finally get past BSL.. all of that hard work will mean nothing to some people because of the fact that i am mixed.. i'm '' supposed '' to have long hair. luckily, i'm growing my hair out to please no one but myself
Kurlee
Well-Known Member
THANK YOU! I really wish people could define what is FULL BLACK. What does a full black person look like? Alot of people say "African" is FULL BLACK, but Africa is full of varying hair textures and skin tones. So I dunno
We are always going to have this hierarchal system that places black folk at the very bottom and its very sad and annoying and people would rather hold on to their ignorance than open their minds to LOGIC.
Fine 4s
Well-Known Member
I was hanging with my girl's friends, (not my homies) this weekend, and I was online at LHCF. And I was explaining what it is we do here, give advice, etc. And I was told that light-skinned girls and/or mixed girls opinions & regimines don't count because they are mixed and already have naturally long hair. OMG!I replied "are you serious?" What about the hard work, etc that went in getting and maintaining long hair doesn't count regardless if they are mixed?" They responded NO!
They even proceeded to say my hair grows so fast because my mom is 1/2 white. I just fell out laughing because one of the girls herself is mixed with short hair. I asked her your mixed, where is your long hair at?
She got mad. Some people are so stuuuuupid!
I guess you won't be seeing them gals anymore j/k
tnorenberg
Active Member
I was hanging with my girl's friends, (not my homies) this weekend, and I was online at LHCF. And I was explaining what it is we do here, give advice, etc. And I was told that light-skinned girls and/or mixed girls opinions & regimines don't count because they are mixed and already have naturally long hair. OMG!
Sometimes you just have to feel sorry for people that ignorant.
Muffinz05
New Member
I know exactly what your talking about. I am a dark skinned sista with long curly hair thats close to waist lenght and people look at me like im an alien or something meanwhile my sister is fair skinned with natural straight hair and she never been past APL. Yes, my sister and I are multiracial but it's also determined by how you take care of your hair.
bettytoo
New Member
IN MY EXPERIENCE, I have never known a brown skinned or dark brown skinned girl to have long hair. Everyone I have ever known with long hair has been lighter skinned (and usually mixed with something that is non-black). In fact, the first dark skinned female with long hair I ever saw was Rudy on the Cosby's. The others I have seen are ladies on the board. I have yet to meet in person a dark skinned female with long hair.
yeah i know what you mean .but there lots of african dark skin women with long har. that aren't mixed .like somali and ethiopian women. their hair grow long . but tend to be 3c to 2c hair.
i always throught it was the size of the curl that .makes the hair retain the length
yeah i know what you mean .but there lots of african dark skin women with long har. that aren't mixed .like somali and ethiopian women. their hair grow long . but tend to be 3c to 2c hair.
i always throught it was the size of the curl that .makes the hair retain the length
Bump!! I'm light skinned and I NEVER had long & beautiful hair. Like Titan said, "If you don't know how to maintain and care for your hair black, white,other, your hair will fall out,break off, tangle, or become frizzy." That was my problem for years & that is exactly what happened to me. Since joining the LHCF, I've learned so much & and am reaping some of the benefits. Like Titan, my mother is brown skinned and her hair is long, thick & wavy (Jet Black). Light or Dark skinned, if you know how to take care of your hair & your health, you will reap the benefits from it. Some may take longer than others, but you still WIN! lol
yuriko
New Member
Actually, Ethiopian, Somali and sudanese women are technically considered mixed. In Northern Nigeria, we have fulanis and Hausas, who may be light or dark skinned, and may have 3c long hair. I come to find out in history class that back in time, this culture was largely mixed with Iraqi, Saudi and amongst others. Ethiopians amongst other east africans are largely mixed, with Berber (north african, like egyptian), saudi and other middle eastern countries. Some ethiopians look really black and have mad kinky short hair, and some look almost white. You never know what you are going to get.
It is beautiful when you have cultures like this where people have many origins and there is much variation of physical attributes.
sweetwhispers
New Member
glamgal198
Member
I never really thought skin color had anything to do with it. My mom's mom was mixed with black and white. She had 9 children, and of the nine, all were born with 3-2c type hair except for my mom (the darkest), and her sister, very light (like seriously, michael jackson ya'll, lol). My mom, and her sister are 4a...i am a 4a/b, and i have a sister who is probably, i'd say, a 3...something (and yes we have the same dad, parents have been married for 22 years). Growing up with a family full of spiral curled hair, they always picked on me and called me nappy. I had the bad hair, my sister had the good hair. My mom never let me have a perm until i was in 8th grade, even though everyone told me i NEEDED one, yet my sister was told "Girl you better not put a perm in your pretty hair." When i did finally put a perm in my hair, you better believe it was long. Just slightly above bra strap. Longer than my SISTERS hair. Suddenly my bone straight relaxed hair was the pretty hair, people were asking me if i was mixed. I look NOTHING like a mixed person. Basically i think that more black women (of any shade) would have long hair if it weren't so chemically processed. When i graduated high school my hair was probably apl, at most...I was watching an episode of soul train, from the 70's and i was in shock at the size of the afro's those women had. I mean...they had ALOT of hair!!! Perhaps it was because it was chemical free? Even if you do use chemicals, you need to care for it, and it can be ALOT of work, but many black women aren't willing to do the necessary work to keep their hair healthy AND relaxed, and thats why they are where they are now. Oh yea, my moms sister, the light one with 4a/b hair, her hair has never been below her shoulders. She insists on perms, and weaves, and does nothing to care for it. So if anything, i'd attribute long hair, to hair type, more than skin color, but i do believe any woman of any skin color (or hair type) can achieve long hair with proper care.
kacielisabeth
New Member
I cut my hair recently but other than that, I've had long waist length hair all my life.
sexyeyes3616
New Member
I did too. LHCF changed my mindset about black women and long hair. And I now no longer believe those stereotypes.
VettaVetta
New Member
That's a shame that people to this day feel like that. First off that is so not true I am light skinned and let me tell you my hair feels like a brillo pad and that is on a good day. People need to educate themselves no one hair is perfect.
This describes my experience as well, including up to age 22 when I found this board. I used to take VERY good care of my hair; in fact, I did almost all the things we talk about on this board. I never used brushes, direct heat only 2x a month, bunning, deep conditioning, stretching my relaxers, etc...and my hair only grew maybe an inch past SL in 17 years, 12 of which I was natural, so it was not relaxers. I gave up on long hair and started wearing my hair in a bob.
Meanwhile, I saw my light-skinned and mixed friends cut their hair and grow it back to APL or longer just like that. To this day, I only have one dark-skinned friend IRL who is not mixed whose hair is MBL. Yeah, this board has opened my eyes, but I will be a true believer when MY hair grows much longer.
sexyeyes3616
New Member
This is not always true. Because my hair is a nice length now and its not in my "genes" to have long hair.
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I have not read all the comments in this thread, but I always wonder why there is still surprise at people's comments about hair, length, skin color, etc. It seems to be a norm for people to be ignorant, misinformed, unaware, opinionated without cause, etc about subjects on physical appearance and other factors. It does not surprise or matter to me anymore.
Experience is not necessarily ignorance. My 6-year-old child of mixed heritage can see that his hair grows faster and has a different curl pattern than his black classmates. He always wants to keep a hair cut because he says his hair is "different." Why adult women pretend that we can't see a different in the hair of people with different racial backgrounds is funny to me.
Really? It's all about how you care for your hair...hmm..then why have some women been on this board caring for their hair diligently and still have a slow growth rate and/ or a hard time reaching their goals? Are all of us walking around with short hair not caring for our hair?? Because I have spent more time, money, and effort on my hair in the last few years than I would like to recount and my hair is still short.
And American society truly is a melting pot, which means most of the cultural ideas here originated elsewhere. I have dark-skinned friends from other countries who have the same ideas about hair that the OP posted (well, her friend's ideas). These are not only "American" ideas.
thank you. i am mixed with 3a/3b hair and i have never been past BSL.. and when i was at BSL, it was very damaged BSL. a lot of my african american friends, growing up, always had longer hair than me. it sucks that when/if i do finally get past BSL.. all of that hard work will mean nothing to some people because of the fact that i am mixed.. i'm '' supposed '' to have long hair. luckily, i'm growing my hair out to please no one but myself
um, BSL is actually long hair.....
....I'm not trying to be defensive or combative- just trying to represent a different viewpoint than most of these posts. I know that there are others who feel the same way, but won't post their real opinion to avoid conflict.
sexyeyes3616
New Member
I have thought about this as well.
chibi
New Member
genetics are everything
sexyeyes3616
New Member
And I use to think this as well. Until I found LHCF. And now my hair is the longest it has ever been.
Prose Princess
New Member
A little off topic, I think it's weird how people assume you're mixed just because you're light skinned. Growing up, most of my light-skinned classmates WERE mixed with something, and people would come up to me and ask me what I was mixed with because my hair was long back then and i'd be like, "Um, nothing?" Both my parents and my parents' parents were all black, and I have light skin but my hair is just as coarse as can be.
There are a ton of misconceptions regarding race, skin tone, and hair floating around. You can't let it upset you.
There are a ton of misconceptions regarding race, skin tone, and hair floating around. You can't let it upset you.
wish4length
Active Member
Genes do determine A LOT, but how are we judging this??
Is everyone who is saying someone's hair is short due to genetics seeing a "short hair gene" on a specific helix within their genes under a microscope?
Or, are you basing your "genetics" on a generation of women that have not had the knowledge you know today about hair?
Don't you think if black women had known what we know today about black hair care their hair would have been long as well? Some of us refuse to stop doing things like applying "grease"/mineral oils to our scalps, go extreme lengths without washing, etc...
True, our hair is dry, and having another ethnicity in your background might add more moisture to your hair's texture, but if you don't know how to take care of your hair (Dark or Light-Skinned) none of that matters..............
Just my 2cents.
Is everyone who is saying someone's hair is short due to genetics seeing a "short hair gene" on a specific helix within their genes under a microscope?
Or, are you basing your "genetics" on a generation of women that have not had the knowledge you know today about hair?
Don't you think if black women had known what we know today about black hair care their hair would have been long as well? Some of us refuse to stop doing things like applying "grease"/mineral oils to our scalps, go extreme lengths without washing, etc...
True, our hair is dry, and having another ethnicity in your background might add more moisture to your hair's texture, but if you don't know how to take care of your hair (Dark or Light-Skinned) none of that matters..............
Just my 2cents.
XXXtacy
New Member
I guess I must have been in a rare community. I saw tons of African-American women with long hair with varying shades of colors. One of my best-friends was chocolate with waist length hair. Her mother, sister, aunt and girl cousins had it too. I saw so many women pull on their hair to make sure it was real & STILL didn't believe it.
It's just amazing people are still talking about things like this in the 2000's. I hope by 2500. This conversation will be a thing of the past like penny candy.
It's just amazing people are still talking about things like this in the 2000's. I hope by 2500. This conversation will be a thing of the past like penny candy.
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