ok, so I was perusing an online dating site, and I came across the profile of someone who seems very promising, into the same things I like, wants to visit the same countries I want, goal oriented individual. I was all set to send him a message when I read that he is 5'5 and quickly hit nex. Sigh... Now I feel bad. I myself am 5'4 and 3/4 (and yes, I am claiming every single quarter of an inch). I am really looking for someone taller than me. Have any of you guys done this? How important should height be? Have you ever decided not to try with someone who seemed perfect on paper but had one little flaw (personal opinions vs. actual flaws, debate for another time) that you couldn't overlook? is that why we are single?
Ok, am I totally wrong for this?
- Thread starter Phaer
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indarican
Well-Known Member
I do this all the time... or at least used to. I definetly cant get with someone who is shorter than me same way i cant be with someone who looks too girly. Just a personal choice, its not wrong... better that your honest with yourself up front then try to make something work that you dont want or like.
ambergirl
Well-Known Member
Yes, you are totally wrong! 
I'm 5'11" and I've dated men shorter then me lots of times. I'm not going to lie, I don't like it, but if one of them had been the right man for me, I would have scooped up his little arse in a heartbeat. And you're only talking about a quarter inch! At least give the guy a chance, perfect on paper is often less perfect in person...regardless of height.
If you are an extremely picky person then maybe that is one reason why you're still single, but I honestly don't think that's why so many women are single.
I'm 5'11" and I've dated men shorter then me lots of times. I'm not going to lie, I don't like it, but if one of them had been the right man for me, I would have scooped up his little arse in a heartbeat. And you're only talking about a quarter inch! At least give the guy a chance, perfect on paper is often less perfect in person...regardless of height. If you are an extremely picky person then maybe that is one reason why you're still single, but I honestly don't think that's why so many women are single.
ScorpioBeauty09
Well-Known Member
I'm 5'3 1/2 and I definitely do it. I'm not having midgets for kids.
No a guy doesn't have to be 6'0 but more than 1 inch or so taller than me is a requirement.
No a guy doesn't have to be 6'0 but more than 1 inch or so taller than me is a requirement.
Katherina
Well-Known Member
It's not wrong to have preferences. If you don't find short men attractive, that's okay. I dated a less than attractive man once. I couldn't overlook it and if we were still together I'd still be looking at him sideways.
However, if you do think there's potential with this man and you can overlook his height, you should give it a try. But just know that having preferences doesn't make you superficial or bad.
However, if you do think there's potential with this man and you can overlook his height, you should give it a try. But just know that having preferences doesn't make you superficial or bad.
I wouldn't say you are wrong, but maybe missing an opportunity to meet a very nice guy who would treat you like a queen and a princess. 
I look at John Legend and Usher... short men yet soooo adorable. And Usher is so impressive as a Dancer, musician as well as a singer. I fell in love with him when I saw him do a Dance number of Gene Kelly's, 'Singing in the Rain'; Usher was Superb, and I just fell in love with Usher's talent, because for the first time, I saw a richness beyond the rap and crap from other Black entertainers.
This man, Usher was polished with skills. Usher was no longer a shorter guy to me, he had stature and grace that of which I am accustomed to being a Dancer myself.
I guess what I'm saying is I understand how you feel, because I prefer tall men too, and I love wearing my cute shoes with heels and still have some height to him where I can look up into 'his' eyes; however, I've learned to look past the height and see the beauty which lives inside of each man's spirit. It's a wonderful thing when a man and a woman can stand face to face and 'see' eye-to-eye.
So, perhaps you could reconsider. And should you go out on a date with him...
Leave the stillettos home. :Rose:
I look at John Legend and Usher... short men yet soooo adorable. And Usher is so impressive as a Dancer, musician as well as a singer. I fell in love with him when I saw him do a Dance number of Gene Kelly's, 'Singing in the Rain'; Usher was Superb, and I just fell in love with Usher's talent, because for the first time, I saw a richness beyond the rap and crap from other Black entertainers.
This man, Usher was polished with skills. Usher was no longer a shorter guy to me, he had stature and grace that of which I am accustomed to being a Dancer myself.
I guess what I'm saying is I understand how you feel, because I prefer tall men too, and I love wearing my cute shoes with heels and still have some height to him where I can look up into 'his' eyes; however, I've learned to look past the height and see the beauty which lives inside of each man's spirit. It's a wonderful thing when a man and a woman can stand face to face and 'see' eye-to-eye.
So, perhaps you could reconsider. And should you go out on a date with him...
Leave the stillettos home.
:Rose:chicitygirl
Well-Known Member
Nope! Especially since if he's saying he's 5'5" online, he's really only about 5'2" because ninjas be lying on the internet! 
He's short and if you're not into short guys, there's no use in wasting his time!
He's short and if you're not into short guys, there's no use in wasting his time!
Guitarhero
New Member
The man I should have married was shorter than me. He was a much better lover lol and all-round person! Alas, we fall in love with another and marry. Well, you have to be comfortable but....if a man can overlook the lack of boobage and the extra padding a woman might have when his dream might be a stacked barbie, well, maybe a centimeter of height is not all that bad??? Besides, aside from slow dancing, when you lay down, it all evens out. It's the heart and intellect that make a better partner.
ppp422
New Member
I might be wrong but I am the same way. I am 5'8 and not dating any guy under 6'0, we don't even get to the possible date scenario; I just stop thinking about you that way. But if you like everything else about him and he is comfortable with it, I don't see what could be wrong with one date...
hopeful
Well-Known Member
I'm betting he's shorter than 5'5. If he's admitting to 5'5, I bet he's really 5'3 or 5'4. But, what if it was a typo and he's 5'10? What if he is indeed 5'5 and turns out to be "the one"? Okay, so I don't think you're wrong at all, but since everything else seemed perfect, I would send the message, and see where it goes from there.
nysister
Well-Known Member
No I don't think you're wrong, that's your preference. I'm sure he'd rather you pass him by as well if he thought you were going to judge him on it. It would be different if you were already dating. That would be mean, if it was a deciding factor later.
Right around the time I met my husband there was this guy I thought was a decent prospect. He was 5'-7" (I'm 5'-4"), and that always stuck in my mind I have to say. Would he have made a great mate? Who knows? But it was a preference that mattered to me. Everyone has them.
You might not want to date short guys, and someone else might not want to date guys with green eyes. Superficial, yeah sure, but that doesn't mean that there's something wrong with it in itself.
Personally, if it's not a big, big deal to you, sending him a message can't hurt, but please don't take it too far if this is a deal breaker for you. It wouldn't be fair to him.
Right around the time I met my husband there was this guy I thought was a decent prospect. He was 5'-7" (I'm 5'-4"), and that always stuck in my mind I have to say. Would he have made a great mate? Who knows? But it was a preference that mattered to me. Everyone has them.
You might not want to date short guys, and someone else might not want to date guys with green eyes. Superficial, yeah sure, but that doesn't mean that there's something wrong with it in itself.
Personally, if it's not a big, big deal to you, sending him a message can't hurt, but please don't take it too far if this is a deal breaker for you. It wouldn't be fair to him.
hrtbndr21
New Member
Yep if he's claiming 5'5" he's probably closer to 5'. At least that's been my experience. But hey he might be a cool guy. I fell for a guy about 5'5" once (I have a +5'10" height requirement) I didn't meet that one online but still the right person can make you forget the height. OP just be prepared.
blue_flower
Well-Known Member
I"m 5'5 and I'm interested in guys 5'10 and taller. That's just the way it is.
Lovelylife
New Member
The world is very judgmental therefore it would be in my kids best interest to not give them short genes.
Everyone has their preferences. Personally, I've always had a thing for short guys. I'm only 5'2" so most men tower over me anyway. My husband is 5'7". Our four year old is the shortest kid in her pre-K class and is probably one of the most confident kids in her class. Her teacher was just telling me that she seems to be a very self-assured little girl.
BrickbyBrick
Well-Known Member
Yes, you are totally wrong!
If you are an extremely picky person then maybe that is one reason why you're still single, but I honestly don't think that's why so many women are single.
nice!!!
MizAvalon
Well-Known Member
So true. With online dating, I automatically deduct 2 inches.
MissYocairis
Well-Known Member
I think you should give him a try, OP. Haven't you ever fallen hard for someone who you were not initially attracted to? He could be The One. You never know. And, not all short men are liars on the innanetz. I have to believe there are SOME men who are charactered enough to put the real deal out there and let the chips fall where they may. Maybe? (am I delusional? probably a hopeless romantic)
luckiestdestiny
Well-Known Member
Before my fiance, whose 5'9, I only dated guys at least 6 ft but it was really that I didn't want anyone like my dad ( short w/ a napolean complex boy did I hate to hear my dad stomping around and up the stairs when I was little with his short self!). But one day I decided jerks come in all sizes as well as good guys, and I got over that. Lucky for me because my fiance is wonderful and nothing like my dad I might add.
luckiestdestiny
Well-Known Member
What if he IS the guy but you passed him up for something so superficial. I'd say give him a try unless you just can't get past it. If you can't he deserves someone who can anyways so its better that you don't date
If height is your must, then you have to be true to yourself. It would be a shame though if you could get over it, and it really was no big deal (except you were caving to outside pressure you know : talk dark handsome, etc). Only you can tell if this is something you are willing to work out because you have to be attracted to him or else its just not worth it.
If height is your must, then you have to be true to yourself. It would be a shame though if you could get over it, and it really was no big deal (except you were caving to outside pressure you know : talk dark handsome, etc). Only you can tell if this is something you are willing to work out because you have to be attracted to him or else its just not worth it.
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CurlyMoo
Well-Known Member
You are NOT wrong. Go for what you want, not what others think you should want. It's you who will have to wake up next to this dude, not anyone else. I did the same thing and have no regrets. I like my men tall with long legs. If I fall for someone shorter then I will go for it. But if I have a choice in the matter I go for the tall guy.
Oh gosh, I guess I have to decide what I can live with and what I can't. I just feel like we have to compromise so much now to be happy. Not saying that's wrong, I guess all those fairy tales have me messed up. I never heard that Cinderella, or snow white ever said 'well he is ...(insert shortfall here) but I guess I can live with it."Yes, you are totally wrong!
If you are an extremely picky person then maybe that is one reason why you're still single, but I honestly don't think that's why so many women are single.
, oh . I went out with a short guy once he was maybe 5'5 or 5'6, and I love my heels, so I am not willing to forgo them to make a guy feel better about himself, there were other reasons why I did not go out with him again (lack of backbone, has no opinion, mysteriously likes everything I like) so I never got a chance to figure out if I can be in a LTR with a short guy or if it is a definite deal breaker.
Nope! Especially since if he's saying he's 5'5" online, he's really only about 5'2" because ninjas be lying on the internet!
ThatJerseyGirl
Well-Known Member
let me give you a guy's point of view.
just yesterday, this guy wanted my opinion (they always come to me for advice lolol). he is dating a woman that he met online. i remember because he showed me her pic. anyway, according to him, she is the sweetest person, very nice, goal oriented, etc. here is the kicker.
one of her breasts is VISIBLY smaller than the other. I mean you can see it through her clothes. At first I was like.."shuga, are u sure she a woman" lolo....he said yes, she is, but now he is contemplating on breaking up with her because of that one issue. he is not a happy camper about it at all. he said she brought up the issue one time when another guy she use to date asked her about it. Well this guy said she just accepted who she is and it does not bother her. I guess so if u stuck with uneven breasts.
Anyway, my friend asked her if she considered breast surgery. i asked him even if she did have surgery, would you still date her. and he just gave me this blank look *hears crickets* I said, keep in mind, her condition may be genetics. let's say she did have surgery to correct her deformed breast. let's just say you guys get married and have a baby. suppose the baby is a girl, who grows up with the same deformity.
then he look at me some more, let out a heavy sigh and was like...i hate to do this because she is a nice girl. He said I can't do it. I don't know....
So he's gonna let me know today. I told him to think about it and don't hurt da po chile's feelins cuz she got lop-sided breasts.
so to you OP, if u don't like datin short men, don't do it. kids may turn out that way too. TRUST ME lolol
just yesterday, this guy wanted my opinion (they always come to me for advice lolol). he is dating a woman that he met online. i remember because he showed me her pic. anyway, according to him, she is the sweetest person, very nice, goal oriented, etc. here is the kicker.
one of her breasts is VISIBLY smaller than the other. I mean you can see it through her clothes. At first I was like.."shuga, are u sure she a woman" lolo....he said yes, she is, but now he is contemplating on breaking up with her because of that one issue. he is not a happy camper about it at all. he said she brought up the issue one time when another guy she use to date asked her about it. Well this guy said she just accepted who she is and it does not bother her. I guess so if u stuck with uneven breasts.
Anyway, my friend asked her if she considered breast surgery. i asked him even if she did have surgery, would you still date her. and he just gave me this blank look *hears crickets* I said, keep in mind, her condition may be genetics. let's say she did have surgery to correct her deformed breast. let's just say you guys get married and have a baby. suppose the baby is a girl, who grows up with the same deformity.
then he look at me some more, let out a heavy sigh and was like...i hate to do this because she is a nice girl. He said I can't do it. I don't know....
So he's gonna let me know today. I told him to think about it and don't hurt da po chile's feelins cuz she got lop-sided breasts.
so to you OP, if u don't like datin short men, don't do it. kids may turn out that way too. TRUST ME lolol
I dated a short guy (5'6", I am 5'9.5" flat footed) and he was so sweet and gentlemanly. He told me that he was a divorcee with 5 kids. I was oh well, we are only dating for a couple of months very VERY casually. Found out yes 3x's divorced and none of his kids were by any of the wives. That is why I stopped dating him, cold turkey. Casual dating divorce with 5 kids from a wife was fine, but his situation was down right scary. So I didn't stop dating him for being short, it was because negro had super sperm and if we would have had protected sex somehow in my head I figured his super sperm would come through that condom and get me. Nah son. LOL
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