I treat people how I want to be treated too soon - folks get used to it, come to expect it, and I end up irritated and frustrated.
...which means the next brother is going to have to woooooooooork!
This is ME to a tee......always willing to give before I'm given. Once my last LTR ended I vowed that the next dude was going too work for everything and then some......so far so good. I have also adopted a new style of communication which means it's about MY wants and needs. No longer trying to gauge if "he's into me or not" or "Am I doing the right thing by him". The summer of '08 has enlightened me too the point where I know that the right man will be able to handle these things and embrace me for the woman that I am.
Oooh this is a great topic for me.
1. I'm way to possessive. I don't know if its due to insecurity, neediness, who knows. But its a horrible relationship habit.
2. I have to be in control.
3. I don't let things rest. I will push an issue forever. I'm trying to learn to just walk away sometimes.
4. Things have to be my way... and that's just it. There is no "or."
5. I'm way too nice. I know it would be hard to believe considering the stuff I just listed, but its true. I am way too nice to guys that I like... platonic friends included.
My biggest negative relationship pattern is getting involved with unavailable men. Men who are just not available to be in a relationship with me for a multitude or reasons.
hearing wedding bells and thinking about kids as soon as i have a crush on someone i deem marriage worthy
how does that cause problems, exactly (I think I'm a therapist)
1. Getting intimate way too quickly w/o developing a real bond.
2. Creating fantasies of the person in my mind, knowing dern well that it's a fantasy.
3. Dating fixer uppers.
I have some thoughts about it. But you know what, some guys don't always reveal that they are unavailable (physically, emotionally, mentally, etc.) from jump. I think I'm just getting to the point where I am starting to recognize unavailability early on and making the decision to not settle for someone who is not available. Unfortunately, my heart is still with someone who is/was unavailable and I am still trying to recover from that relationship. In time, I know I will heal and that process of healing will help me in the future to avoid unavailable men.Do you know why? ( I have done this also... a lot)
My biggest negative relationship pattern is getting involved with unavailable men. Men who are just not available to be in a relationship with me for a multitude or reasons.
I have some thoughts about it. But you know what, some guys don't always reveal that they are unavailable (physically, emotionally, mentally, etc.) from jump. I think I'm just getting to the point where I am starting to recognize unavailability early on and making the decision to not settle for someone who is not available. Unfortunately, my heart is still with someone who is/was unavailable and I am still trying to recover from that relationship. In time, I know I will heal and that process of healing will help me in the future to avoid unavailable men.
My biggest negative relationship pattern is getting involved with unavailable men. Men who are just not available to be in a relationship with me for a multitude or reasons.
1. Getting intimate way too quickly w/o developing a real bond.
2. Creating fantasies of the person in my mind, knowing dern well that it's a fantasy.
3. Dating fixer uppers.
-I get irritated way to quickly
-I tend to bottle up my feeling instead of expressing myself....then get I mad b/c he "dosen't get me"
-I tend to lose interest if something goes wrong.
This was so me.
When I look back at relationships that failed, it was always because the dude was going through something and really wasn't "available" for me. Yeah, we might have been together in person, but not in spirit.
So when I wasn't getting what I needed, I'd get mad and tell them about themselves (bad move). Then they'd push back even further and finally the breakup would happen.
But I would always feel like I was compromising so much in my relationships, and the reason why was because they weren't really ready for one.