Natural Hair = Depression?

[BraunSugar]

I have a TWA right now (look at siggy), and I absolutely LOVE it....everybody else loves it on me too. Although my hair was almost MBL when I cut it, I don't miss it. I needed a change. I was just READY when I BC'ed (after 3 month transition). I think you NEED to be ready, or you'll be shocked and depressed.

As others have stated, maybe you should get a wig and wear that for a while until your hair gets to the length that you desire.

ITA. When I initially BC'd I was fine, but I had a hard time adjusting to styling hair that short & it was making my head hurt. I finally figured out a couple of styles. Finger coils saved my life for the first month & a half. I started doing wash & gos w/headbands and other accessories to make it work. On occasion I'd cornrow my hair & put a wig on. I even tried to do a puff w/my little 3 inches of hair LoL. It's almost been a yr natural for me and I am still figuring out styling.

 

[Luvcurlies1984]

When I was at that length, I was able to wear a few different styles. It wasn't the length I wanted, but I werked what I had baby! Even though I aspire to grow my hair as long as I can, I've honestly never felt more beautiful than when my hair was this short!

I wore various headbands.

Experimented with finger waves.

Two strand flat twists in the front.

With finger coils in the back.

Slicked down edges.

Slicked down completely!

Back shot.

Fluffed out mini-puff with another headband!

With really short hair, it might seem that you have no styling options, but just a little variation can create a different look! Two strand twists aren't the end all be all. Use this time to experiment with your hair and see what you can create!

Thanks for the pics. Ur hair looked very cute short. I suffer from extreme shrinkage and frizz. I'm a 4b which I love, but I noticed that my hair type is harder to style when shorter. It doesn't take gel as well as urs.

 

[Luvcurlies1984]

ITA. When I initially BC'd I was fine, but I had a hard time adjusting to styling hair that short & it was making my head hurt. I finally figured out a couple of styles. Finger coils saved my life for the first month & a half. I started doing wash & gos w/headbands and other accessories to make it work. On occasion I'd cornrow my hair & put a wig on. I even tried to do a puff w/my little 3 inches of hair LoL. It's almost been a yr natural for me and I am still figuring out styling.

Thanks girl! I was fine when I just BCed too, but I think after a while I got a bit impatient. That or my expectations were too high, I expected too much. I am glad for all the encouragement, I'll just try and stick out this akward phase

 

[Luvcurlies1984]

I hate super short hair on me ( didn't stop me from BCing 3 times though). The shortness makes me feel unfeminine, and i got all paranoid and wore a lot of makeup and lots of big ol' dangly earrings and dresses to try to make myself feel more girly.

What I did during the in between stage is really just lots of headbands and hair clips. It helped me feel more pretty. It was never really a texture issue for me ( ETA Clarify: never a being natural issue), but just what kind of length I am used to. I found I felt much much much much MUCH better once I hit chin length (stretched), and from zero ( i had a centimeter of hair) it takes less than a year to get there. By five months I could make a slightly retarded but good enough looking puff ( but the trick is to use an elastic headband and not actually make a pony tail just push it back till it rests on your head kind of like a halo, just enough to make a puff piled up on your head.

here are a few pics from my most recent BC first picture is around 4 months post chop, next two are 5 months, last is 6 months. Sorry for the size.

I love your hair short Thanks for the pics.

 

[aleemah]

Kiki0130 It was I who posted that first vid.. I did that style today and got some elastic headbands and it turned out so nice!! I feel so much better and I wore my hair out today for the first time

OP, I know how you feel because just yesterday
i felt the same way! It had gotten so bad that I start dreaming of just relaxing. I searched youtube and forums for hairstyles and just got in the mirror trying different things. We seem to have a few things in common. http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=538841

 

[Arian]

This is off topic, but OP, you & I have the same BC date!

Sent from my T-Mobile myTouch 3G Slide using Long Hair Care Forum App

 

[AMAKA127]

I think we all go through the awkward stage when we BC and want to run and hide under a rock .... Its hard to mentally adjust to the new you but just know that there is light at the end of the tunnel and as long as you take care of your hair it will grow. One thing i did for about two months is wore wigs that I actually made. I learned from this youtube video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LrFtuocCYUA by MS. Chanda

the process is much cheaper than purchasing an actual wig

Good luck and know your hair doesn't define you ... your beautiful regardless

 

[keepithealthy]

I wore my co-washed and used gel on my twa. I also brought some hair candy to feel more girly. My sister didn't like the short hair look on her so she wore wigs until it go to a length she was comfortable with.

 

[ericajoy]

Oh, I definitely went through this phase! I feel like I'm just coming out if it, actually. I BC'ed twice and hated the in-between length both times. I had some bad hair days. The pics at the bottom are some of the styles that actually turned out well: side part with headband, both sides parted and pulled back, twists (which I hated at the time but that look okay in the pic), and pulled up on one side.

A few things I realized, one, you probably think your hair looks worse than it does. I thought my hair looked terrible at these lengths and then I look back and these pics and it wasn't so bad. Two, I felt better if I "balanced" my shorter hair with bigger earrings or different makeup -- I found that a little more eyeliner or some brighter lipstick made me feel "prettier." Three, twists were just unfortunate on me then and still are now. If you don't like your hair in twists, don't wear them. Get your hands in your hair and try some different products and styles -- it doesn't have to stay twisted and covered up to grow.

Hope this helps! Good luck! Btw, tell your man to stop giving you the side eye and go buy you some cute earrings or something. Men!

 

[Luvcurlies1984]

This is off topic, but OP, you & I have the same BC date!

Sent from my T-Mobile myTouch 3G Slide using Long Hair Care Forum App

Well they say great minds think alike! How long did you transition? I didn't, lol, just got scissor-happy one day.

 

[Luvcurlies1984]

Oh, I definitely went through this phase! I feel like I'm just coming out if it, actually. I BC'ed twice and hated the in-between length both times. I had some bad hair days. The pics at the bottom are some of the styles that actually turned out well: side part with headband, both sides parted and pulled back, twists (which I hated at the time but that look okay in the pic), and pulled up on one side.

A few things I realized, one, you probably think your hair looks worse than it does. I thought my hair looked terrible at these lengths and then I look back and these pics and it wasn't so bad. Two, I felt better if I "balanced" my shorter hair with bigger earrings or different makeup -- I found that a little more eyeliner or some brighter lipstick made me feel "prettier." Three, twists were just unfortunate on me then and still are now. If you don't like your hair in twists, don't wear them. Get your hands in your hair and try some different products and styles -- it doesn't have to stay twisted and covered up to grow.

Hope this helps! Good luck! Btw, tell your man to stop giving you the side eye and go buy you some cute earrings or something. Men!

Thanks for the great tips girl! Ur hair is so pretty. I try to understand that its a bit shocking for him and he is trying to be supportive. I didn't tell him that I was going to BC. He just came home one night and got the shock of his life. At least he isn't critical like some others, but I can still tell that he hates it. I'm going to stick it being natural, I'm not turning back now

 

[glamazon386]

Wash and go or put it away in a protective style until it grows out.

 

[ericajoy]

Thanks for the great tips girl! Ur hair is so pretty. I try to understand that its a bit shocking for him and he is trying to be supportive. I didn't tell him that I was going to BC. He just came home one night and got the shock of his life.

^^Thanks! If it makes you feel any better, my hair is kind of difficult and fine and dry and doesn't have a regular curl pattern once it gets past about 4 inches long, but through experimentation I've found some products and techniques that make it look decent. I know you will too!

And lol at cutting your hair off without telling your guy! I bet he WAS shocked. He'll get used to it. And he'll be happy at how much less time it takes you to get ready to go out with a wash n go.

 

[Kiki0130]

Kiki0130 It was I who posted that first vid.. I did that style today and got some elastic headbands and it turned out so nice!! I feel so much better and I wore my hair out today for the first time

OP, I know how you feel because just yesterday
i felt the same way! It had gotten so bad that I start dreaming of just relaxing. I searched youtube and forums for hairstyles and just got in the mirror trying different things. We seem to have a few things in common. http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=538841

aleemah

Hey chica! Thanks so much for posting that video and your
results. Now I really can't wait to try it!

I wish I had been brave enough to just cut off my hair to a twa
but I had my momma's voice in my head talking 'bout how I'm
gonna look like a bowling pin with no hair.

 

[libertysince05]

I just wore wash and gos and then when it got longer (and i got bored) i put in boxed braids with extensions.
but i never felt ugly/weird, etc, etc...i wasnt attached to my hair before shaving it off...

 

[Beautytalk69]

I hate super short hair on me ( didn't stop me from BCing 3 times though). The shortness makes me feel unfeminine, and i got all paranoid and wore a lot of makeup and lots of big ol' dangly earrings and dresses to try to make myself feel more girly.


UrbainChic I think u look very pretty with short hair!

 

[Arian]

Well they say great minds think alike! How long did you transition? I didn't, lol, just got scissor-happy one day.

I transitioned for 10 months--wanted to cut @ 7 months, but let a stylist talk me out of it..

 

[EccentricRed]

Althought my BC wasn't near my scalp, I got freaked out after a week and kind of sad, and immediately put micros in my hair. I left the micros in for about 2 months, and when I took them out, I was more comfortable with my length. Don't worry girl, you will get through the phase!

 

[Poohbear]

Hi guys! I’m new to LHCF. I recently big chopped my hair to the scalp on September 20, 2010. Since then, I gained about 3 inches of growth and I keep it in two strand twists. My problem is because of the length my hair just sticks up in the air, as if I put my finger in a light socket. I don’t know how to style it, I don’t feel pretty right now and it’s making me very depressed. I have been thinking that natural hair might not be for me. Is this a phase when going natural? Did anyone else go through this?Please post pics of how you styled your Twa when it was my length. I don’t want to perm my hair but I’ve been really thinking about it lately.

"Not feeling pretty" is why you are feeling depressed.... not having natural hair.

And how will relaxing your hair make you feel any better? It will go from 3 inches of natural hair to 3 inches of relaxed hair...

Give your hair time to grow. Focus more on yourself and how you feel about yourself rather than your outward appearance. Work toward building up your confidence, then you will not have to worry about how your hair looks.

 

[ActionActress]

Hi guys! I’m new to LHCF. I recently big chopped my hair to the scalp on September 20, 2010. Since then, I gained about 3 inches of growth and I keep it in two strand twists. My problem is because of the length my hair just sticks up in the air, as if I put my finger in a light socket. I don’t know how to style it, I don’t feel pretty right now and it’s making me very depressed. I have been thinking that natural hair might not be for me. Is this a phase when going natural? Did anyone else go through this?Please post pics of how you styled your Twa when it was my length. I don’t want to perm my hair but I’ve been really thinking about it lately.[/QUOT

Hugs to you. Natural hair--is for everyone since we are born with our hair, no matter the texture. The question is, what techniques are we doing to make what we are born with, to help our hair? The stick up hair is a short phase. As some one said earlier, try to make the twists a bit smaller. Play with your hair and enjoy it.

AA

 

[brucebettye]

I had that problem when I first bc, but I hide my hair under wigs until I became comfortable with it. I regretting it and texlaxed my hair then I had a setback because of the texlaxing and I have just grown out my hair this time. I will not do a bc again, it is not for everybody. But I do not regret going natural, I love my hair and I probably will never have straight hair again(too much work for me).

 

[Vashti]

I was stuck in that awkward phase for many years. I often wore an afro puff or braid extentions

 

[Prudent1]

OP,
You will be fine.
There are a lot of threads that list tools, accessories, products, and other tips for ladies who recently did a BC. I can't list them all but I"ll put a few here. I found them by using the serach engine located across the top of the section. I think it is just a matter of you finding out what products and methods work best for your hair. It will be trial and error. HHG
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/search.php?searchid=2441631
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=536767&highlight=bc
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=538199&highlight=bc

 

[HauteHippie]

Yes Girl, this is exactly how I feel. Can't wait to have a lovely head of hair like urs

That there is a wig!
It's a kinky straight lace wig I got from this lady in TX off of eBay. I wore it during my short transition.