MY DH IS GOING NATURAL!

[Naturae]

So my DH and I had a 45 minute debate on Natural vs. Relaxed this past friday night. I have been natural for 5 years and he has been relaxed and in cornrows since he was in high school. I have been doing his relaxers and cornrows for him though, since we've known each other (7 years). His argument was that he wants to be able to consistantly wear his hair strait without having to fool with it too much; especially since he works out for an hour every day. He wants long, sexy strait hair down to his MB but he's too lazy too put in the work to get it. He has had this relaxer for over a decade and his hair is still SL because he brushes way too hard + while his hair is wet, AND he pulls his hair back into a ponytail too tight, he never moisturizes and never detaingles. I told him that I really want him to accept the natural hair that God blessed him with without resorting to chemicals and that he can't have every thing he wants. Also, I confessed to him that he has gorgeous 4c coils that are dense but very fine and would look absolutly stunning if he could get all of that to retain to MBL. He smiled... (hook, line and sinker!) He then said " If you can give me a regimen that works for my schedule and won't get in the way of other things then I will go natural"
Ya'll already know..... I came back 5 minutes later with a layout for how we're going to start caring for his hair and how he's going to transition out of his relaxer.... (he does NOT want to BC). So his new reggie as follows:

Clarify Wash once a month
followed by ORS Pak DC and a Aubrey Organics protein treatment also once a month
PC will be cornrows
I told him which products under the bathroom sink he can use:
100% pure Africa Shea Butter (to soften new growth)
Aphogee Leave -in Pro-Vitamin Conditioner Spray (light protein for the demarcation line)

Once a month I will chop a half inch off, as his hair grows about a half inch a month.

I will straighten his hair only 2x's a year with a maxiglide to allow him to show off his hair, other than that it's going right back into braids
He agreed with the regimen and even now is thinking about how good he's going to look with MBL coils.
He sent me aan email of Goku from DragonBall Z -- titled " My hair in 8 years! (except black)" LOL

<--goku


I'm so proud of my bayybay!

 

[UGQueen]

aww good for him! keep us updated.. maybe even with pics

 

[Honey Bee]

Wait, your man has a perm? Is that what you're saying?

If so, FANTABULOUS that you've encouraged him to transition! I'm sure his MBL natural coils will be stunning.

 

[Yoshi3329]

Gee, gee! Keep us updated!

 

[Naturae]

Girl yes, the only 29 year old grown man with a relaxer. lol

I can't wait to show ya'll with pics how his natural hair looks. I have to sneak snapshots though... getting him to pose for a pic is like pulling teeth.

 

[Nonie]

So cute, you two on a hair growing journey.

 

[*Belle*Femme*]

Your man wears a perm????? Wow
Well good luck to the both of you.
P.S. him going natural im sure is a waaaayyyy better look for him than a perm

 

[Naturae]

Your man wears a perm????? Wow
Well good luck to the both of you.
P.S. him going natural im sure is a waaaayyyy better look for him than a perm

I can only assume that you mean no harm in your comments but I was offended by this.

 

[divachyk]

Good luck on this new journey. I enjoy talking hair with my dh. My dh is natural and wears a very low cut style (military like cut). He is also on a HHJ for hair regrowth for thinning in his crown due to cancer and in support of me to regain the length I once had prior to his battle. Warning Spiritual Plug --> Praise be to God he's healed!!! Okay back to the lecture at hand --- I wash & DC his hair, put on a heat cap for him, scalp massage and the whole 9....he loves visiting my salon (figure of speech). Perhaps you can take the time to do these things for your honey (if you have the time and if you don't already). I don't find these things to be burdesome; I actually enjoy the closeness it brings for us helping each other. Best wishes!

 

[DDTexlaxed]

How awesome is that! You tell him that we all are rooting for him.

 

[WaistLengthDreams]

That is so cute that you guys are on the HHJ together! He's going to be so glad he listened to you when he gets that MBL hair! HHG to you both!

 

[*CherryPie*]

I don't think she meant it to be personally towards YOU. A lot of women (myself included) find men with relaxers unattractive. Don't take it personally.

I can only assume that you mean no harm in your comments but I was offended by this.

 

[Ms Lala]

What a cute story. I don't understand why guys relax and then wear braids all the time anyway.

 

[hopeful]

Good luck to him. Staying in braids will make his transition easy! This should be a fun journey for both of you.

 

[RossBoss]

I don't think she meant it to be personally towards YOU. A lot of women (myself included) find men with relaxers unattractive. Don't take it personally.

Really? Actually I have never thought about it so this is interesting to know. When I think of men with relaxers I think of men in the 1970s, older men or of men in the South, so maybe OP lives in the South. I don't think I have ever come across a younger man with a perm but definitely older men. This is something to think about.

 

[Solitude]

I haven't heard of a lot of men with relaxers, but plenty of men with long hair press it occasionally. My dad used to press his fro waaayyyyy back in the day. (He's worn his hair completely bald/shaved since I was a kid, though...once his hair started thinning out.)

Tell your DH good luck on his hair journey and thanks for sharing! Personally, I'm a sucker for a taper fade. I'm surprised your hubby won't just cut it all off!

Now that I think about it, I wonder how many guys I know who are braided up also have relaxers?

 

[divachyk]

^^^ I live in the south and I think relaxers are uncommon but don't quote me. Most men seem to press instead but of course there are exceptions. I can see why relaxing would be better for a lasting style.

 

[lilsparkle825]

if he is a 4b/c/z, then MBL stretched will be like NL or SL unstretched. MBL unstretched will be like FLOOR LENGTH stretched. which is he aiming for?

lol @ goku....i haaaaate dragonball z....but he likes it, i love it

 

[AlliCat]

Since he wears cornrows, his transition should be that much easier

 

[Naturae]

Good luck on this new journey. I enjoy talking hair with my dh. My dh is natural and wears a very low cut style (military like cut). He is also on a HHJ for hair regrowth for thinning in his crown due to cancer and in support of me to regain the length I once had prior to his battle. Warning Spiritual Plug --> Praise be to God he's healed!!! Okay back to the lecture at hand --- I wash & DC his hair, put on a heat cap for him, scalp massage and the whole 9....he loves visiting my salon (figure of speech). Perhaps you can take the time to do these things for your honey (if you have the time and if you don't already). I don't find these things to be burdesome; I actually enjoy the closeness it brings for us helping each other. Best wishes!

Honestly he hates the fact that with his relaxer I had to make in an almost ALL day process, from wash,dc, protein, sitting under dryer, moisture, etc. But the one thing he LOVES is when i wash his hair at the sink...lol he fell asleep once.

I don't think she meant it to be personally towards YOU. A lot of women (myself included) find men with relaxers unattractive. Don't take it personally.

Thats fine, everyone is intitled to their opinon. But I felt as if her comment was unecessary.

Really? Actually I have never thought about it so this is interesting to know. When I think of men with relaxers I think of men in the 1970s, older men or of men in the South, so maybe OP lives in the South. I don't think I have ever come across a younger man with a perm but definitely older men. This is something to think about.

We do live in the South. My DH is from Arkansas so whenever we go back to his town I see a lot of males with relaxers. I, however, am from Los Angeles, CA and you would get CLOWNED badly if you were caught relaxed as a male, let alone a grown man. But it was his decision and I want to be supportive in any way that I can. But I honestly can't say I will miss his relaxer...lol

if he is a 4b/c/z, then MBL stretched will be like NL or SL unstretched. MBL unstretched will be like FLOOR LENGTH stretched. which is he aiming for?

lol @ goku....i haaaaate dragonball z....but he likes it, i love it

He is going for MBL stretched! After that, he said he will start trimming regularly.. he doesn't want it any longer than that.

Since he wears cornrows, his transition should be that much easier

And on top of that, his hair won't break so easily. He has a very heavy hand and when his hair is not in braids I get nervous. I almost want to hide all the soft boar bristle brushes and buy him a baby brush.

 

[BostonMaria]

When I met my DH one of his friends had put a texturizer in his hair to make braiding easier for her. I gave him the stank eye when I found out (no offense LOL) and about 3 years later he cut his hair bald, now his hair is long again and natural. I forbid him from putting a relaxer in his hair ever again LOL

 

[Naturae]

Good luck on this new journey. I enjoy talking hair with my dh. My dh is natural and wears a very low cut style (military like cut). He is also on a HHJ for hair regrowth for thinning in his crown due to cancer and in support of me to regain the length I once had prior to his battle. Warning Spiritual Plug --> Praise be to God he's healed!!! Okay back to the lecture at hand --- I wash & DC his hair, put on a heat cap for him, scalp massage and the whole 9....he loves visiting my salon (figure of speech). Perhaps you can take the time to do these things for your honey (if you have the time and if you don't already). I don't find these things to be burdesome; I actually enjoy the closeness it brings for us helping each other. Best wishes!

Congrats on overcoming cancer! My DH loves when I wash his hair... the rest of the process he couldn't care less for. lol

I don't think she meant it to be personally towards YOU. A lot of women (myself included) find men with relaxers unattractive. Don't take it personally.

That's fine. Everyone is intitled to their own opinion. But i felt like her comment was unnecessary

Really? Actually I have never thought about it so this is interesting to know. When I think of men with relaxers I think of men in the 1970s, older men or of men in the South, so maybe OP lives in the South. I don't think I have ever come across a younger man with a perm but definitely older men. This is something to think about.

We do live in the South (he is from Arkansas). Whenever we visit his howmtown I do see a few males with relaxers with chewed up ends. So my guess is that males with perms is the iscolated culture in that part of town. But I was born and raised in Cali. I would NEVER see a male, old or young, with a perm.

if he is a 4b/c/z, then MBL stretched will be like NL or SL unstretched. MBL unstretched will be like FLOOR LENGTH stretched. which is he aiming for?

lol @ goku....i haaaaate dragonball z....but he likes it, i love it

He is going for MBL stretched...lol

 

[Naturae]

When I met my DH one of his friends had put a texturizer in his hair to make braiding easier for her. I gave him the stank eye when I found out (no offense LOL) and about 3 years later he cut his hair bald, now his hair is long again and natural. I forbid him from putting a relaxer in his hair ever again LOL

The thing is I do a really good job with my DH's relaxers so you couldn't even tell he had one unless his hair was out of braids. The relaxer not only made his hair easy to braid, but it made the overall appearance APPEAR like healthy hair and like his texture was just naturally 2a. (I used Olive Oil Organic Root Stimulator box relaxer in Regular Strength.) Now that he is transitioning, I can help him focus on the problem areas like moisture balancing and protecting his ends. I am so exited to see his long drool-worthy locks!

 

[MrsHouston]

Edit and Repost

 

[MrsHouston]

What a cute story. I don't understand why guys relax and then wear braids all the time anyway.

I think it makes their braids look neater. When I use to get cornrows, the person would always want to blow dry first...I did like the look better, as it was neater and lasted longer.

BTW, love your hair Ms. LaLa. I'm going to have to follow you.

 

[Janet']

Congrats to your hubby!

 

[Naturae]

I am thinking of doing two strand twists for him once he reaches SL unstretched. Would that be crazy for both of us to sport the same hair style? lol

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

Oooh this sounds like fun! Congrats to him (and you) on the start of his natural journey! Can't wait to read the updates, especially the Goku one

 

[divachyk]

You should sneak some pics....then tell him how many ppl support him....that may have him open to taking more pics. I love seeing progress of anyone.

 

[Rain20]

Stop putting everything on the South. Relaxers on men in the South are very uncommon. Presses on men in the South are very uncommon. Maybe in one town in the South but I havent seen it. I actually have seen it more in the Midwest if I had to pick an area. Every city in the South is not the same. Please stop the stereotyping.

Maybe doing a BKT will help during his transition.