Maybe long hair just isn't for me...

angaliquew

angaliquew

New Member
I don't mean to have a pity party but I have been on my hair journey for over three years and although my hair continues to get thicker I still have not been able to get past shoulder length.:wallbash:

I have been vigilant about the health of my hair while members in my family have skirted by shoulder length to nearly bra strap length...using extreme heat, wearing weaves back to back w/out taking care of their hair underneath, no deep conditioning, etc...

I know for sure that the problem isn't with my hair not growing, the problem is maintaining my length...if I even look at my hair wrong it breaks and the thickness doesn't help.

Ugh...I give up :sad:
 
angaliquew said:
I don't mean to have a pity party but I have been on my hair journey for over three years and although my hair continues to get thicker I still have not been able to get past shoulder length.:wallbash:

I have been vigilant about the health of my hair while members in my family have skirted by shoulder length to nearly bra strap length...using extreme heat, wearing weaves back to back w/out taking care of their hair underneath, no deep conditioning, etc...

I know for sure that the problem isn't with my hair not growing, the problem is maintaining my length...if I even look at my hair wrong it breaks and the thickness doesn't help.

Ugh...I give up :sad:
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You hair looks nearly bsl to me because of the curl left in. Don't use any heat and bun it. Do you often wear it naturally? Use cremy moisturizers to smooth it down into a bun and keep it off your shoulders. You hair is thick and luscious-looking girlie. It's gorgeous.
 
locabouthair said:
What's your reggie?

Your hair is beautiful!!

And how's your diet? How often do you trim?
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Thank you...I was wearing kinky twist & braidouts but as my hair became thicker these styles contributed to my hair tangling. At this point I have been forced to stretch my hair out using some type of heat (blowdryer, flat iron, etc...) so that I can reduced the chances of it tangling.

My ends are my biggest problem...I used to trim every couple of months but they still looked like crap so I stopped.

My diet is an area I need to work on...maybe that's the issue. :ohwell:
 
GV-NA-GI-TLV-GE-I said:
You hair looks nearly bsl to me because of the curl left in. Don't use any heat and bun it. Do you often wear it naturally? Use cremy moisturizers to smooth it down into a bun and keep it off your shoulders. You hair is thick and luscious-looking girlie. It's gorgeous.
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Thanks, I wish it was but it's shoulder length...the back stretches to my collarbone. I have tried the natural thing but it has caused me more damage then good. I have a very tight curl pattern..added with thickness and you have a tangled mess. Maybe I'll leave it in a bun for a year and do nothing to it. I'm just frustrated. :ohwell:
 
HIDE YOUR HAIR RIGHT AWAY!! Sorry for yelling but uh....whenever I feel like this, I just hide it.

Gee thee in braids, sew in, whatever!!! Hide it for a year and don't think about it.

If you aren't APL in a year, I'll shave my head!

DISCLAIMER: The above statement was meant for dramatic purposes only. SMS does not intend to shave her head. Thank you.
 
I think the bun is the secret to getting over the hump. I really do. I am a total believer in protective styling and it's frustrating when your hair isn't long enough to make it into a bun or you have a big head (ahem). But if you can bun, I dare you to do it and see if you won't retain a lot of what you grow. Happily Me can tell you that minimal manipulation will take you far.
 
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All I can say is that I so relate, OP. Your story is mine exactly!!!! I seemed to retain more length when I was relaxed which is why I've been seriously considering texlaxing.
 
supermodelsonya said:
HIDE YOUR HAIR RIGHT AWAY!! Sorry for yelling but uh....whenever I feel like this, I just hide it.

Gee thee in braids, sew in, whatever!!! Hide it for a year and don't think about it.

If you aren't APL in a year, I'll shave my head!

DISCLAIMER: The above statement was meant for dramatic purposes only. SMS does not intend to shave her head. Thank you.
Click to expand...

Like I said, I think I will try to bun for a year and if I don't make it to APL by then...I might have to shave mine too. ;)
 
kweenameena said:
All I can say is that I so relate, OP. Your story is mine exactly!!!! I seemed to retain more length when I was relaxed which is why I've been seriously considering texlaxing.
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This is exactly why I went back to using heat...too loosen my curl pattern. I wish I could do relaxers but they broke my hair off even worst...guess I will be stuck up in a bun for a minutes....
 
Nonie said:
I think he bun is the secret to getting over the hump. I really do. I am a total believer in protective styling and it's frustrating when your hair isn't long enough to make it into a bun or you have a big head (ahem). But if you can bun, I dare you to do it and see if you won't retain a lot of what you grow. Happily Me can tell you that minimal manipulation will take you far.
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Sure is! :yep:
 
Natural hair won't budge if the ends are allowed to knot up and tangle. Believe me, I dealt with this too. With shorter to medium length natural hair this is the reality. The hair grows up and out, and the ends love to tie themselves into knots. Once the hair gets longer and heavier it will start to hang down in its natural state and the amount of knotting and tangling will be reduced. Until then, it's time to pamper the ends.

Wearing stretched styles more often is the way to go for now. It greatly reduces the amount of tangling you'll have. I did braidouts for the longest time. Right now I'm weaving it up for a year to give my hair a rest.

When I'm not weaving it up here's what I do.

-I dampen my hair and use a cheapie conditioner to detangle before washing. Once I'm done with that I shampoo. Right now I'm using my Shikakai bar I purchased from a local Indian market. I always keep my hair under running water and detangle as I rinse.

-When I'm done washing I condition and rinse again, still making sure my hair is detangled.

-Once I'm done with that I run some coconut oil over my soaking wet hair in the shower. I place by hair into a smooth ponytail and apply a generous amount of castor oil to the hair hanging from the ponytail. While the hair is still soaked, I braid it into one braid, making sure I braid it all the way through the ends. If you need to do more than one braid, go ahead. Since I'm obsessed with castor oil I put a dab on the very end of the braid.

-I then style it. I no longer wear wash and go puffs, instead I'll let the hair dry in a few braids and wear a braidout puff. I never let my ends dry up outside of a castor soaked braid.

I've found that with my natural hair, I need to comb/brush my hair more. I know this is a no-no around here, but with my hair if it sheds and I don't comb the shed hairs out, they'll wrap themselves around the rest of my hair.

I've been experimenting lately with using black strap molasses in my hair. It's worked great so far. I mix some BSM with olive oil and put it on damp hair before a cowash. Be careful because it stains. I let it sit in my hair for 30-45 mins then cowash it out. It's very moisturizing.

HTH
 
Don't give up. Bunning helped me get over my lil hump. I felt just like you too. My hair wasn't going ANYWHERE. I just kept it moisturized and out of my hands for 1-2 months and that really helped me. I feel like once you get to apl it's happy sailing then because your ends aren't rubbing against your shirts. You'll make APL. Just be patient
 
Your hair is gorgeous.
Do like the other ladies have said, bun it and stay far away from heat.
Moisturize your hair daily. Have you tried coconut oil/shea butter mix?
It's heaven.
 
OH my goodness, the tags!!!!!

I thought the purpose of this board was to be supportive.
BTW, I am pretty sure the Mods can see who put it there.

How childish...
 
MissNorway said:
Your hair is gorgeous.
Do like the other ladies have said, bun it and stay far away from heat.
Moisturize your hair daily. Have you tried coconut oil/shea butter mix?
It's heaven.
Click to expand...

I have been using coconut oil for the past couple of months...haven't really noticed a difference. I've been using it as a moisturizer instead of a sealer...that's correct right?
 
I would be happy as can be if I had a much hair as you do. But I know it can be frustrating to be "stuck" at a certain length. Maybe you need to reassess your use of coconut oil. It has nourishing properties and can penetrate the hair shaft but I real moisturizer will have water as it's first ingredient. Also instead of blow drying have you tried doing jumbo twists or banding. You could also alternate bw the blow dryer and these methods.
 
angaliquew said:
I have been using coconut oil for the past couple of months...haven't really noticed a difference. I've been using it as a moisturizer instead of a sealer...that's correct right?
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___________________________________________________________

Use your coconut oil to do a scalp massage. This stimulates growth and tuck away those ends until you reach your goal. Good Luck.
 
hurricane--BTW OT...but er...that Ayurveda is doing your hair a world of good. I've been looking at your siggy and its just growing its tail off!!!! Great job!
 
supermodelsonya said:
hurricane--BTW OT...but er...that Ayurveda is doing your hair a world of good. I've been looking at your siggy and its just growing its tail off!!!! Great job!
Click to expand...

____________________________________________________________

Thank you and I am pleasantly surprised as well.
 
Your hair looks long to me in that pic. What U talking 'bout Willis?:grin: Your hair looks so pretty. I can do 2 mini pony puffs, but I look like a kid with it.:rolleyes: Natural hair makes me look like a kid with gray hair. I am still working on ways to look more 'grown".:ohwell:
 
MissNorway said:
OH my goodness, the tags!!!!!

I thought the purpose of this board was to be supportive.
BTW, I am pretty sure the Mods can see who put it there.

How childish...
Click to expand...

I agree..Aren't we all here to grow our hair?

OP, I didnt know you were natural. I think Redriot gave good suggestions.
 
angaliquew said:
I have been using coconut oil for the past couple of months...haven't really noticed a difference. I've been using it as a moisturizer instead of a sealer...that's correct right?
Click to expand...

Yeah, you can use it as both, i just slap it on my hair after i co-wash.
Have you been doing daily co-washing BTW?
My hair is super thirsty and that has worked wonders for my hair.
A tip, when you co wash, load up with some cheap conditioner, you really don't need the fancy expensive ones, let it sit for a minute then stick your head quickly under the shower head. Not to rinse out but to soak you head, then it is easier to de-tangle. and when you are done de-tangling, don't rinse out the conditioner, just squeeze out the excess water and slap some more conditioner on and use it as a leave-in. This is what i do and my hair is super-moisturized.
 
id try cowashing every other day and detangling in the shower at that time. immediately after put your hair in braids or twists if it's bed time. if it's during the day make sure you do a neat bun as opposed to a messy bun.
 
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