Male friend or ex-friend

[phynestone]

Okay, so I have a male friend that I've known for years. A few weeks ago, I really needed someone to talk to (someone who really knows me) and I contacted him. He didn't return my call until a few weeks later when he informed me that he lost his job. I call him later and there's a female asking him in the background if he was talking to a girl. He wasn't himself or saying much and he tells me he'll call me later. He calls me later that evening and tells me that his ex-girlfriend (female in the background) wanted him to call me. I guess she thought he was being inappropriate. I attempt to make small talk and he isn't saying anything, so I ended the call. The week passes and I don't hear from him. I thought what he did was extremely shady and was prepared to let him know. I call him twice and can't get a hold of him. I send him a text....and then he wants to contact me. I let him have it and decide to end the friendship. I don't need anymore funny folks around me 'cause I can do bad all by myself. He begins to blow up my phone like you wouldn't believe. 19 missed calls from him as I'm cooking and several texts saying that we need to talk like adults and that he hopes I am healed by the Lord. I really dislike it when others try to use the Lord and scripture as a way to justify their actions. I am now quick to cut people off b/c being "understanding" has gotten me nowhere. I now believe when you show your nasty side, people think twice about messing with you. End of story. Your thoughts, asap.

 

[Chocolatelove2010]

He has a girl, and doesn't want to talk to other girls......

Whatever the reason don't waste your time rationalising it.

Drop him.

He returned your calls a few weeks later?

wtf

Delete his number....

walk away gurl.

Kmt about he lost his job. Unless he got knocked over by a car, or possessed by the devil he has no excuse for not calling back sooner.

 

[Mai Tai]

Sounds like he has a new girlfriend and has chosen the relationship over your friendship and has chosen not to tell you about this said new relationship.

I understand that you may feel slighted by his lack of communication and disclosure, but if you all are truly friends, I think you should give him the space to develop and respect this relationship.

 

[phynestone]

He has a girl, and doesn't want to talk to other girls......

Whatever the reason don't waste your time rationalising it.

Drop him.

He returned your calls a few weeks later?

wtf

Delete his number....

walk away gurl.

Kmt about he lost his job. Unless he got knocked over by a car, or possessed by the devil he has no excuse for not calling back sooner.

Well, he told me he couldn't call me b/c his luggage was lost. Fine. But he could have emailed me too.

 

[phynestone]

Sounds like he has a new girlfriend and has chosen the relationship over your friendship and has chosen not to tell you about this said new relationship.

I understand that you may feel slighted by his lack of communication and disclosure, but if you all are truly friends, I think you should give him the space to develop and respect this relationship.

I do respect his relationship and I also understand as a friend of the opposite sex, sometimes you need to fall back. I always did whenever he had a girlfriend and when he dated this same female a few years ago, she had a problem with my relationship with him. We don't talk once a day or week. Maybe once or twice a month. Sometimes we email, but not anymore. Funny how I never did the same when I was dating my ex-boyfriend.

 

[*CherryPie*]

It seems that you're expecting him to behave the way you would. He is not you, so he is not always going to do things the way you think he should. But that shouldn't end your friendship.

It sounds like he has some things going on also. His luggage was lost, and he has a jealous new girlfriend. Those are 2 stressful things.

I know you're going through something, so you patience is probably thin, but try to look at things from his side. Thre's no need to lose a long time friendship over this.

 

[ThickHair]

Women and men do things different. To me he did the typical male thing. I don't think it is anything to lose a friendship over, but if you feel you must then end it.