Lurker that was inspired to come in and get some advice....

[MACgirl2k2]

Hello all. I have been in an on and off relationship with a guy 3 years younger than me for 3 years. When we first met he was very sweet and brought my flowers for no reason and all that good stuff. As the years progress he started hanging out with this friend that has bad taste in women and has no idea what love is. We have broken up 3 times and each time, he has slept with 3 different women. I stay away from him but he keeps coming back and trying to convince me it will be better each time and like a damn fool I take him back....

I stopped being intimate with him in 2003 because I still have trust issues. I even left him for two years. We recentely decided to get back together again three weeks ago and now that I am going through a health crisis he is at it again. He doesn't call and when he do all he want to talk about is himself and the gym. He gives me excuses like i don't have any minutes. When he does come to see me, he ask me for carfare so he can get home. Ladies should I get rid of the boy and move on for good. Am I fighting a losing battle. Please help.....

~ A damn fool in love...or something like it. (sorry for the long story)

 

[Laginappe]

What's on your Wish List of the man and relationship you want? Give us some of the highlights. Like:

I want a man who has ____________
Is _______________
Does________________

 

[MACgirl2k2]

That's a good question...Let see....

I want a man who has a good head on his shoulders.
Is smart,hardworking and caring.
Does take care of himself and has good manners.


I don't ask for much, but I keep ending up in this same death trap.

 

[Nefertiti0906]

I think you're fighting a loosing battle. Your list of what you want in a man is not what you currently have.

I know it's hard to move on, but I hope that you do...

 

[Nay]

Macgirl, you are not in a relationship. You are in a waste of time! Stop rifling through the trash and leave this fellow out of your life once and for all.

Anybody can put on a sweet front in the beginning. That don't mean a thing. He has shown you his true worthless selfish self time and time again. THAT is who he really is.

And don't blame his bad behavior on his friends. A good man won't turn bad no matter whom he is around. As a matter of fact, a good man wouldn't be hanging around a bunch of worthless dogs in the first place.

You are not fighting a losing battle. You've already lost. You've lost the time you've given him, the love you've given him, and your precious body and soul that you have shared with him. He doesn't deserve any of it. Cut him loose, stop remembering the "good times" and move on with your life.

The sooner you close that chapter the sooner you will be able to heal from the nonsense he has put you through and take better care of yourself, body and soul.

Stop selling yourself short and accepting this second-hand treatment.

 

[MACgirl2k2]

I want walk away but it so darn hard. I guess its my self esteem issues. I don't feel like someone can love me. But I just want to be happy. Im sad when Im alone and even sadder when Im in a so called relationship...something just doesnt feel right.

 

[MACgirl2k2]

You are not fighting a losing battle. You've already lost. You've lost the time you've given him, the love you've given him, and your precious body and soul that you have shared with him. He doesn't deserve any of it. Cut him loose, stop remembering the "good times" and move on with your life.

You are so right about that....Im trying my best to cut him loose.

 

[tylertown]

Well I know of this really nice guy who's nice looking and cool. Good conversation and not the best at everything but a nice catch.

Guess what? You were supposed to meet him. But you were with this guy.

Dont keep wasting time and missing out on some guy you will have the same amount of love for but will treat you as you deserve.

This guy does not love you. And you dont deserve him.

 

[MACgirl2k2]

Thanks ladies..Im going to break it off with Mr. wrong and wait for the love I deserve. It long overdue.

 

[Summer_Rain]

I just want to point out the eerry reoccurence of the number 3

 

[donna894]

I just want to point out the eerry reoccurence of the number 3

So maybe this means "Strike Three: You're Out"

If you have been putting up with this crap, obviously you are going to have self-esteem issues. This man is tearing you down. Getting away from him for good will be the first step in your recovery.

 

[tarheelgurl]

Move on. He thinks that he can come back each time and you will be there everytime he decides to return. You have to break that cycle.

 

[MzLady78]

Hello all. I have been in an on and off relationship with a guy 3 years younger than me for 3 years. When we first met he was very sweet and brought my flowers for no reason and all that good stuff. As the years progress he started hanging out with this friend that has bad taste in women and has no idea what love is. We have broken up 3 times and each time, he has slept with 3 different women. I stay away from him but he keeps coming back and trying to convince me it will be better each time and like a damn fool I take him back....

I stopped being intimate with him in 2003 because I still have trust issues. I even left him for two years. We recentely decided to get back together again three weeks ago and now that I am going through a health crisis he is at it again. He doesn't call and when he do all he want to talk about is himself and the gym. He gives me excuses like i don't have any minutes. When he does come to see me, he ask me for carfare so he can get home. Ladies should I get rid of the boy and move on for good. Am I fighting a losing battle. Please help.....

~ A damn fool in love...or something like it. (sorry for the long story)

Please leave this triflin' *** negro alone.

You need to be focusing your energy on yourself and your health right now, not him and his bullshyt cause that's exactly what all of it is- bullshyt.

 

[jturner7156]

It is obvious that you have outgrew this BOY. Let him go find a GIRLfriend so a MAN can find you!!!

 

[sonce]

Hello all. I have been in an on and off relationship with a guy 3 years younger than me for 3 years. When we first met he was very sweet and brought my flowers for no reason and all that good stuff. As the years progress he started hanging out with this friend that has bad taste in women and has no idea what love is. We have broken up 3 times and each time, he has slept with 3 different women. I stay away from him but he keeps coming back and trying to convince me it will be better each time and like a damn fool I take him back....

I stopped being intimate with him in 2003 because I still have trust issues. I even left him for two years. We recentely decided to get back together again three weeks ago and now that I am going through a health crisis he is at it again. He doesn't call and when he do all he want to talk about is himself and the gym. He gives me excuses like i don't have any minutes. When he does come to see me, he ask me for carfare so he can get home. Ladies should I get rid of the boy and move on for good. Am I fighting a losing battle. Please help.....

~ A damn fool in love...or something like it. (sorry for the long story)

Ok. Let us analyze this situation:

1. Downhill trend: "When we first met he was very sweet and brought my flowers for no reason and all that good stuff..."

2. Bad friends: "As the years progress he started hanging out with this friend that has bad taste in women and has no idea what love is." Birds of a feather, girl...

3. Incurable: "We have broken up 3 times and each time, he has slept with 3 different women."

4. Undeserving of trust: " I stopped being intimate with him in 2003 because I still have trust issues."

5. Selfishness: "He doesn't call and when he do all he want to talk about is himself and the gym."

6. Lying: "He gives me excuses like i don't have any minutes."

7. Brokeness: "When he does come to see me, he ask me for carfare so he can get home."

---------

Diagnosis: Terminal BAMS (Broke-*** M*thaf*kka Syndrome).

Girl, now you know you didn't have to come ask us nothing. Your boy is no good and should have been a distant memory by now. God bless you sista, love yourself enough to leave this joker.

 

[MACgirl2k2]

You all are right....Im done... I already started avoiding his calls. I am going to try and get myself together and stop playing this stupid game with him. I want off this merry-go-round.