Ladies Please help!!
- Thread starter golden1
- Start date
Farida
Well-Known Member
I think you are used to and comfortable with being with him.
Do you think no other man would love you?
What is that makes you feel you don't deserve better?
Sweetheart, I knew something was up in your OP but I couldn't tell. I just knew something was up. Now I know.
Please, please, please. Leave him. Pack your bags and leave when he is not home, or when he is sleeping. Have someone come pick you up - preferably a hefty man or a pair or three men. Don't tell him you are leaving, just do it and then leave a not saying if he tries to find you you will put a restraining order on him. He is not going to change and it will only get worse after you get married.
3 out of 10 women are killed by their husbands/BFs/Dates/Fiances. Please don't let yourself be one of those women.
Do you think no other man would love you?
What is that makes you feel you don't deserve better?
Sweetheart, I knew something was up in your OP but I couldn't tell. I just knew something was up. Now I know.
Please, please, please. Leave him. Pack your bags and leave when he is not home, or when he is sleeping. Have someone come pick you up - preferably a hefty man or a pair or three men. Don't tell him you are leaving, just do it and then leave a not saying if he tries to find you you will put a restraining order on him. He is not going to change and it will only get worse after you get married.
3 out of 10 women are killed by their husbands/BFs/Dates/Fiances. Please don't let yourself be one of those women.
WomanlyCharm
New Member
Oh Golden, sweetheart, I wish I was there with you to hug you and tell you ever thing is going to be alright.
And it will, if you take the steps necessary to maek sure this man doesn't hurt you again, or maybe even kill you.
That means leaving him. I know it hurts, and you two have a very long history together, but if he's already beaten you up numerous times, he could get even more violent and not hesitate to end your life. That is a cold fact.
How do you think your mother will feel planning your funeral, choosing what outfit to bury her baby in?
One of my friends had to lay her daughter to rest after she was beaten to death and stabbed by her boyfriend. And it will haunt her for the rest of her days. Please don't put yourself or your family through that kind of pain.
A real man wouldn't raise his fist against a woman. Please leave him. Please.
And it will, if you take the steps necessary to maek sure this man doesn't hurt you again, or maybe even kill you.
That means leaving him. I know it hurts, and you two have a very long history together, but if he's already beaten you up numerous times, he could get even more violent and not hesitate to end your life. That is a cold fact.
How do you think your mother will feel planning your funeral, choosing what outfit to bury her baby in?
One of my friends had to lay her daughter to rest after she was beaten to death and stabbed by her boyfriend. And it will haunt her for the rest of her days. Please don't put yourself or your family through that kind of pain.
A real man wouldn't raise his fist against a woman. Please leave him. Please.
JamericanGurl
New Member
You need to leave!
Leave him Alone!
Cutting off all contact inclusive of his friends and family!
Unconcern yourself with the realtionship he has with his ex.
Forget about the good times when he was so sweet, because that was all part of the Jeddi Mind trick.
Go get a PPO...Stat!
Now, I'm hoping that you take my advice, but there's something in your words that tells me you're not done with this situation...When you should be! Now you can pray and keep waiting for God to send you a sign....He did already...When that Knee-grow clopped you upside the head...that was your sign for God.
I'm not trying to be mean, but I'm giving you the facts straight with no chaser! you deserve better and no monkey arse man has the right to put his hands on you!
Please quit pondering this and get up and go the the police station and file a report. Then come back to your home or apt with some boxes and some big lawn and leaf bags pack up and go stay somewhere else for a while.
Worry about you!
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strenght81
Well-Known Member
WOW, I can't believe how the topic changed from cheating to beating. I hope you are Ok. You seem to be holding on to this image of how he use to be, let that go and see him for the boy he is today. A man should never put his hands on a woman; not even if she provocked it. If he threatens to leave, let hom go. he should have left sooner. You don't derserve to be beaten up, but only you can decide what you're going to accept, good luck.
gabulldawg
Well-Known Member
I'm still trying to figure out of this is serious or not... Are you really considering being with a man who physically hurts you??? We all have heard the stories about women who have turned up DEAD because they gave their man the benefit of the doubt! OP, please don't let it be you. You can't make people change, and actually, your actions are showing him that he doesn't need to change to keep you. 
You definitely have bigger problems than whether or not he is keeping in contact with his ex,
You definitely have bigger problems than whether or not he is keeping in contact with his ex,The bloody eye that I have tells me it's serious. The broken heart and hurting knees from praying for hours on end tells me it's real. The confusion and sense of loose ends lets me know its real. Abusive relationships are more easy to get swept up in more than you think. It's like a whirlwind and this private world that you don't want to let anyone end from embarrassment, fear and shame. I can only live day by day and deal with my feelings day by day.
Ms_Delikate
Well-Known Member
Please take the advice of the other ladies and leave...It will hurt, I know many of us have been there. Over time you will be all right...Like you said take it one day at a time...Cry when you need to and mark the days off the calendar if you have to but please believe me when I say that THIS TOO SHALL PASS. Leave that man alone.
sharentu
Well-Known Member
as much as you love him... love yourself even more. i know that people can change, i know that you love him. but, love wont matter if you are found somewhere dead. Love God, love yourself and live.
tatiana
Well-Known Member
Speaking from personal experiences of being in an abusive relatioship, I understand how you feel scared, confused, and in loved.
One day after two years of being with this guy, he choked me and literally chased me around the house with a knife, it was to the point I thought he was going to kill me for real. By the grace of God, I stop trying to fight him and he calmed down sort of, he trashed my living room and then left. Did I call the cops? No becase I was afraid of him. Did I let him back into my life? Yes because I at the time could not imagine life without him. I also thought it was my fault for the incident.
It took me over a year to get this person out of my life but I did it and so can you. God does not want you to be with someone that hurts you. This isn't love.
I understand if you can't leave him today but you can start today. Start thinking about yourself more and stop talking/thinking about him. Try it for an hour and then try it for a half day, then a day, then a week and so forth. Seek help from professionals, church, and family. I would consider filling a police report or going to the hospital so the abuse is documented which is needed for a restraining order. Write down every good and bad thing that this man has done or has said and imagine if you have a daughter would you want your daughter date a guy like this if no he is no good. Read the Goddess sticky everytime you come to this site.
You ARE beautiful and worthy of love. You CAN live a beautiful life without him. IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. If you stop doing something because of him, slowly start again. You ARE NOT ugly, stupid, or whatever he said.
Good luck and I will be praying for you.
One day after two years of being with this guy, he choked me and literally chased me around the house with a knife, it was to the point I thought he was going to kill me for real. By the grace of God, I stop trying to fight him and he calmed down sort of, he trashed my living room and then left. Did I call the cops? No becase I was afraid of him. Did I let him back into my life? Yes because I at the time could not imagine life without him. I also thought it was my fault for the incident.
It took me over a year to get this person out of my life but I did it and so can you. God does not want you to be with someone that hurts you. This isn't love.
I understand if you can't leave him today but you can start today. Start thinking about yourself more and stop talking/thinking about him. Try it for an hour and then try it for a half day, then a day, then a week and so forth. Seek help from professionals, church, and family. I would consider filling a police report or going to the hospital so the abuse is documented which is needed for a restraining order. Write down every good and bad thing that this man has done or has said and imagine if you have a daughter would you want your daughter date a guy like this if no he is no good. Read the Goddess sticky everytime you come to this site.
You ARE beautiful and worthy of love. You CAN live a beautiful life without him. IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. If you stop doing something because of him, slowly start again. You ARE NOT ugly, stupid, or whatever he said.
Good luck and I will be praying for you.
gabulldawg
Well-Known Member
I hate to be blount, but It's really a matter of life and death!! Do you want to live or die? Leave and live without him, or stay and possibly die by the hands of him. It's that simple.
Extremus
Well-Known Member
I hate to be blount, but It's really a matter of life and death!! Do you want to live or die? Leave and live without him, or stay and possibly die by the hands of him. It's that simple.
It's that simple to me too
