Jess a.k.a Mahogany Curls responds to Curlynikki drama

[Mz.MoMo5235]

Girl bye. All of us are mixed with SOMETHING. I guess you could call me mixed or multiracial too, but I am first and foremost Black. That is what I choose to identify with. But we are talking about WHITE WOMEN and the NHM. Not biracial, multiracial, mulattoes, octaroons, etc. Some of us know our heritage and others don't. Even so, we do not need to rub it in others' faces, and put "mixed" allover everything and use that disclaimer each time we post.

It's things like that that cause further divides in the community...and brought up the so-called, "good hair vs. bad hair" debate, the same old same old...just like the house N's vs. field N's ****. We need more togetherness, not division. The Man divides and conquers. We don't need to use that on each other and put ourselves into selective groups of this and that.

See, had I kept reading I wouldnt even have needed to say anything!!

But wtf is a "octaroons"?!?!?!?

Never mind. Googled it. Had not clue there was a word for being 1/8th black. That there is enough proof we need this for us and only us! They have a special word for being 1/8th German when the rest of you is English? A word of you're German and 1/8th Scottish? Do they have words for that? Or was that created just for us??? Cause we cant seem to have nothing to our self except for labels to remind us that we arent them!

 

[Kurlee]

Thank you and thank you some more! I knew I was not tripping in my thought process here.

And I still dont know where this is coming from?! No one has said anything about kicking each other out! All we have been preaching is unity amongst US here. Where is this confusion coming from?! I'm starting to think I'm brand new!!!

Did I miss the tragic mulatto bus? Was my black card revoked and no one told me?!? I mean man! I dont understand! And this is why my BP goes up every time I come back in here after I say I'm done.

I keep falling for the bait knowing its a trap I swear

I'm convinced that some people want a cookie for having some kind of mix in their background. The confusion and crisis is pretentious and comes from a need to constantly make a distinction between the unicorn (better than/closer to white) Black and the regla Black. It's uber annoying, extra and thirsty. If that's how folk feel I mean, NC has a huge following and pantene is in every corner store. Just saying.

 

[Divine.]

So, out of interest, what do you guys think of me being in the natural hair movement?
Considering I'm mixed race?

The reason I ask is because where is the line here?

(I'm just interested and won't argue with you if you reply )

I think that you're still in the same boat as the rest of us There is no line to be drawn. White women have held privilege for centuries. That's what caused this uproar in the first place, not a woman with 3b hair who is clearly multi-racial. The natural hair community has been pretty accepting of anyone is who of African descent. As much division there is in the black community, would it really make sense to create even more division over something so trivial?

 

[oneastrocurlie]

Makes no difference to me. I don't support them either way.

Go you!

10 char

 

[blessedandfavoured]

I'm convinced that some people want a cookie for having some kind of mix in their background. The confusion and crisis is pretentious and comes from a need to constantly make a distinction between the unicorn (better than/closer to white) Black and the regla Black. It's uber annoying, extra and thirsty. If that's how folk feel I mean, NC has a huge following and pantene is in every corner store. Just saying.

Hi Ladies, I just feel the need to point out that in England, the racial climate is very different from that in the U.S. There was/is no one drop rule, and being mixed-race is an actual thing - you're not just black because one parent is, and you're not seen as a sell-out for accepting your non-black heritage as well as your black heritage.

And as far as I know, people are not as openly racially hostile in England as they are in America. So I guess because she lives in the U.K, Channy31 is a bit confused by this whole thing. That said, I think Channy31 already said that she doesn't talk about her hair to her white friends, even if they have curly hair - so there is your answer.

Channy31, please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

 

[Mz.MoMo5235]

My cousins live in the UK and are half white... They say they are pretty much looked at as black and are often joked of for being the token friend. I dont think UK white folk are as doe eye as we are led to believe. Of course, that's just 2 of my cousins. They cant really speak for every mixed person in all of Europe, the place is pretty big. Just putting out what they've said of their life there (born and raised Brits and still live there. Raised by a white mother and white step dad. Minimal America time unless we made their dad feel guilty and bring them down for the summer. Again, js).

 

[Mz.MoMo5235]

OT: I actually do want cookies now... Its 9 am and all I can think about are some chocolate chip cookies

 

[Kurlee]

Hi Ladies, I just feel the need to point out that in England, the racial climate is very different from that in the U.S. There was/is no one drop rule, and being mixed-race is an actual thing - you're not just black because one parent is, and you're not seen as a sell-out for accepting your non-black heritage as well as your black heritage.

And as far as I know, people are not as openly racially hostile in England as they are in America. So I guess because she lives in the U.K, Channy31 is a bit confused by this whole thing. That said, I think Channy31 already said that she doesn't talk about her hair to her white friends, even if they have curly hair - so there is your answer.

Channy31, please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

Context definitely matters, but the approach and rationale cuts across various contexts. Same ish, different day. I am familiar with the UK context and people of mixed race and from what I hear, unless you can pass, you're kinda seen as Black. UK racism is polite racism. Are they not one of the founders/authors of global colonialism?

 

[Kurlee]

My cousins live in the UK and are half white... They say they are pretty much looked at as black and are often joked of for being the token friend. I dont think UK white folk are as doe eye as we are led to believe. Of course, that's just 2 of my cousins. They cant really speak for every mixed person in all of Europe, the place is pretty big. Just putting out what they've said of their life there (born and raised Brits and still live there. Raised by a white mother and white step dad. Minimal America time unless we made their dad feel guilty and bring them down for the summer. Again, js).

This has been my experience as well. People love to romanticize Europe as the cradle of modernity. Oh please!

 

[LdyKamz]

Hi Ladies, I just feel the need to point out that in England, the racial climate is very different from that in the U.S. There was/is no one drop rule, and being mixed-race is an actual thing - you're not just black because one parent is, and you're not seen as a sell-out for accepting your non-black heritage as well as your black heritage.

And as far as I know, people are not as openly racially hostile in England as they are in America. So I guess because she lives in the U.K, Channy31 is a bit confused by this whole thing. That said, I think Channy31 already said that she doesn't talk about her hair to her white friends, even if they have curly hair - so there is your answer.

Channy31, please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

But this has nothing to do with nothing. This is about WHITE women. How many times can this be said. What is confusing about that. This chick is neither black not mixed. She is plain straight up white with curly hair. That's the end of it. How do these conversations get skewed? Everyone always wants to come in and start talking about and asking questions about things that don't apply. The only reason that question would be asked to me would be because she considers herself white. And if she doesn't then this is't about her! Mz.MoMo5235 I'm with you. I don't know why I keep coming back in these threads.

 

[reeko43]

I am angered by the fact that anyone would argue for inclusion in the natural hair movement. Unless a person has lived all of their life around whites and had 2a hair themselves, there is no way that a person cannot understand the pain and humiliation black people have endured through generations.

I am a 3c/4a crown, haired natural who was told throughout childhood that it is a shame that I didn’t get my mother’s (3a) hair. I thought my hair was a “bad” grade. It wasn’t until I went natural, (2011) that I have ever been referred to as having decent or “good” hair.
Throughout my life I have known children who were constantly ridiculed for their “bad” hair. I have a coworker who wears her hair closely cropped but texturizes the top. I asked why she won’t just let that be natural as well. She replied, “I will never be natural. My hair is disgusting. I have bdb’s but you wouldn’t know about that. See you have good hair you can do that. Why would I ever walk around with my hair looking like a slave? I am a professional you know!” This coworker later complained to someone else that I was trying to make fun of her hair.

That woman’s hurt is real. It hurts me that she cannot realize that all types of natural hair is beautiful. But, I understand. It took years of taunting and teaching her that her hair was horrible for her to feel like this even in her mid- forties. How can I not acknowledge that? Our men have even been brainwashed to believe that even curly haired white women have better hair than black women. This self-hate runs too deep for us to just pretend that we have any connection with whites who may complain about frizz or curls.

I think it is just downright selfish for a white woman to insist on being a part of the movement and for black women to advocate for their rights. We are still hurting as a people to be accepted by our own. The people that make the most fun of or shun black hair are black themselves. We need to learn that our hair is ok and to heal ourselves from this self-hate disease. Then, we will be in a position to reach out to others.
I don’t blame the white girl who was interviewed. Whites do what we let them do. I blame blacks who don’t take a stand and make sure that our healing places and avenues are secure and protected.

 

[Mz.MoMo5235]

But this has nothing to do with nothing. This is about WHITE women. How many times can this be said. What is confusing about that. This chick is neither black not mixed. She is plain straight up white with curly hair. That's the end of it. How do these conversations get skewed? Everyone always wants to come in and start talking about and asking questions about things that don't apply. The only reason that question would be asked to me would be because she considers herself white. And if she doesn't then this is't about her! @Mz.MoMo5235 I'm with you. I don't know why I keep coming back in these threads.

Cuase we're passionate about the subject! Its like being a glutton for punishment or something

All I know is to me and to many this is a very touchy deep rooted subject. And honestly I just assumed (foolishly obviously) that ALL of us on this board at least had the same passion and... I dont know, I dont want to say sensitivity but I do feel sensitive about it. Like when I see people on THIS board, not other sites, not fb, not youtube but HERE, saying stuff just to start something/cause a commotion, or when I see that some of these women really do not get it, I feel some kind of way about that. Like a low blow to my soul almost!

Its truly bothersome to me and I honestly do need to stay out of these type of threads because, despite how calm I may come off I really do get hyped about this and I often have to re-write a response 5x before posting (or decide not to post) because I'm trying to help others understand with out coming off as a d-bag! And I can be a jerk I really can! And its soooooo hard for me because I really do feel this is so freaking important.

Ugh!!!! Its self torture. It really is.

But then when I see that moment when we're all grooving together (maybe not always agreeing but being real about things and gelling) it fills my heart up so much.

So I keep coming back. Like a crazy head

 

[Mz.MoMo5235]

I am angered by the fact that anyone would argue for inclusion in the natural hair movement. Unless a person has lived all of their life around whites and had 2a hair themselves, there is no way that a person cannot understand the pain and humiliation black people have endured through generations.

I am a 3c/4a crown, haired natural who was told throughout childhood that it is a shame that I didn’t get my mother’s (3a) hair. I thought my hair was a “bad” grade. It wasn’t until I went natural, (2011) that I have ever been referred to as having decent or “good” hair.
Throughout my life I have known children who were constantly ridiculed for their “bad” hair. I have a coworker who wears her hair closely cropped but texturizes the top. I asked why she won’t just let that be natural as well. She replied, “I will never be natural. My hair is disgusting. I have bdb’s but you wouldn’t know about that. See you have good hair you can do that. Why would I ever walk around with my hair looking like a slave? I am a professional you know!” This coworker later complained to someone else that I was trying to make fun of her hair.

That woman’s hurt is real. It hurts me that she cannot realize that all types of natural hair is beautiful. But, I understand. It took years of taunting and teaching her that her hair was horrible for her to feel like this even in her mid- forties. How can I not acknowledge that? Our men have even been brainwashed to believe that even curly haired white women have better hair than black women. This self-hate runs too deep for us to just pretend that we have any connection with whites who may complain about frizz or curls.

I think it is just downright selfish for a white woman to insist on being a part of the movement and for black women to advocate for their rights. We are still hurting as a people to be accepted by our own. The people that make the most fun of or shun black hair are black themselves. We need to learn that our hair is ok and to heal ourselves from this self-hate disease. Then, we will be in a position to reach out to others.
I don’t blame the white girl who was interviewed. Whites do what we let them do. I blame blacks who don’t take a stand and make sure that our healing places and avenues are secure and protected.

See, THIS hits my heart! I feel this deep down to my core! This makes me emotional! That is why I keep bringing my behind in here trying to promote unity among US!!! WE NEED IT! We have soooo much work to do still. We cant open up shop to every becky when the store isnt even finished! We just barely got the foundation down let alone a strong building the can with stand the sabotage becky will bring with them!

I need to camomile tea and some cookies now. I need to calm my nerves!

 

[wavezncurlz]

I'm mixed too. My hair is 3a/b. I'm here and no one can tell me that I don't belong. Especially after I paid my $6.50.

Many people told me that I have that "good hair" and "it's so much easier for you". So? I don't give a flying fcuk if someone else's journey is harder or easier than mine. I'm on my own trip and it's just as real for me as their's is to them.

Besides, I was that one natural (or so it felt) in NYC in the 80/90s. Holding it down as hard as I could until the rest of my sisters caught up. There should be some points for that.

Me too! Old head checking in! Not mixed but my hair is 3ish. Shoot, I'm part of this movement and was natural when natural wasn't cool. I also have helped many a woman transition (one of my gf's tried 3 times and finally did it last month!).

and I have a daughter who's hair is nothing like mine (in the 4's) who (through the help of you ladies) has past WL hair.

Please... oh nvm...

 

[wavezncurlz]

See, THIS hits my heart! I feel this deep down to my core! This makes me emotional! That is why I keep bringing my behind in here trying to promote unity among US!!! WE NEED IT! We have soooo much work to do still. We cant open up shop to every becky when the store isnt even finished! We just barely got the foundation down let alone a strong building the can with stand the sabotage becky will bring with them!

I need to camomile tea and some cookies now. I need to calm my nerves!

Someone please get Mz.MoMo5235 some cookies. She's asked like 10x already!!!

 

[Channy31]

you are not white. you are mixed and part black. you also have afro texture curls that you used to relax. in the past you have also experienced extreme breakage and damage trying to maintain straight hair because you did not accept your curls. you have also struggled with accepting your hair because you are biracial living in a predominately white environment. so, yes the natural hair movement applies to you. why are you try to compare apples to oranges? do you realize that you saying team natural and sarah saying team natural are not the same thing? her struggle is not the same as your struggle and the context is different.

Sounds good, was just interested in peoples opinions Thanks for sharing.

i'm just guessing, but these kinds of poor comparisons come up because even though the reality may be "black", the existence of another side creates a sense of allegiance, even though they are not (and most likely never will be) included in that group, unless they can pass . I don't agree with the one drop rule, but I find it confusing (and hilarious) when people who look like and experience Black life act brand new. Half the time, nobody cares or can even tell unless people explicitly point it out with a genealogy lesson and even then, it's like : want a cookie or something?

I do agree with you there! I'm not sure what the phrase "act brand new" means though .

No one curr

I'm mixed too. My hair is 3a/b. I'm here and no one can tell me that I don't belong. Especially after I paid my $6.50.

Many people told me that I have that "good hair" and "it's so much easier for you". So? I don't give a flying fcuk if someone else's journey is harder or easier than mine. I'm on my own trip and it's just as real for me as their's is to them.

Besides, I was that one natural (or so it felt) in NYC in the 80/90s. Holding it down as hard as I could until the rest of my sisters caught up. There should be some points for that.

Girl bye. All of us are mixed with SOMETHING. I guess you could call me mixed or multiracial too, but I am first and foremost Black. That is what I choose to identify with. But we are talking about WHITE WOMEN and the NHM. Not biracial, multiracial, mulattoes, octaroons, etc. Some of us know our heritage and others don't. Even so, we do not need to rub it in others' faces, and put "mixed" allover everything and use that disclaimer each time we post.

It's things like that that cause further divides in the community...and brought up the so-called, "good hair vs. bad hair" debate, the same old same old...just like the house N's vs. field N's ****. We need more togetherness, not division. The Man divides and conquers. We don't need to use that on each other and put ourselves into selective groups of this and that.

Sorry I didn't mean to offend, by mixed I mean that my parents are different races and essentially grew up in different cultures. So in a way I am part of the white and black community, and at the same time a part of neither haha (my experience).

I am aware that most people have a drop of everything including both my white and black friends. Have to agree with you on the togetherness stuff

Like we've stated before this is for us! Women of African bloodline. Which includes blacks in the states and over seas, blacks in the African diaspora, and mixes of this group.

This whole thing didnt pop off because a mixed curl with 3b hair was featured and crying inclusion. Fortunately as a mix girl who cant pass (based on your hair pix) you're stuck with us homie.

And I'm really not sure why mixed girls, black latinos, or even just light skinned girls would even think this has anything to do with them to start with?

I'm a 3b black Puerto Rican and I fully understand where this is coming from, going, and I'm on the wagon yelling "charge" with my fellow 3b, 3c, 4a, 4b, 4c, 4lmnop sisters.

I just... I dont understand how its not clear. Maybe I'm missing something!

I'm not sure what you mean by "can't pass" and "you're stuck with us tbh". I'm very happy here . I was just genuinely interested in opinions, so thanks for sharing.

I think that you're still in the same boat as the rest of us There is no line to be drawn. White women have held privilege for centuries. That's what caused this uproar in the first place, not a woman with 3b hair who is clearly multi-racial. The natural hair community has been pretty accepting of anyone is who of African descent. As much division there is in the black community, would it really make sense to create even more division over something so trivial?

Thanks for all your replies! Very interesting.. and sorry I seem to have upset people by asking you guys opinions.

 

[Channy31]

But this has nothing to do with nothing. This is about WHITE women. How many times can this be said. What is confusing about that. This chick is neither black not mixed. She is plain straight up white with curly hair. That's the end of it. How do these conversations get skewed? Everyone always wants to come in and start talking about and asking questions about things that don't apply. The only reason that question would be asked to me would be because she considers herself white. And if she doesn't then this is't about her! Mz.MoMo5235 I'm with you. I don't know why I keep coming back in these threads.

Sorry I've offended!

I identify as mixed as was just genuinely interested in peoples opinions, and as a mixed person I personally felt it was a question worth asking.

 

[Channy31]

I'm convinced that some people want a cookie for having some kind of mix in their background. The confusion and crisis is pretentious and comes from a need to constantly make a distinction between the unicorn (better than/closer to white) Black and the regla Black. It's uber annoying, extra and thirsty. If that's how folk feel I mean, NC has a huge following and pantene is in every corner store. Just saying.

Sorry to offend, i don't want a cookie. I love both my races equally and am very proud to of my heritage.

Although I have no idea what you mean by "thirsty" or what NC is haha. I was just interested

 

[curlicarib]

I am angered by the fact that anyone would argue for inclusion in the natural hair movement. Unless a person has lived all of their life around whites and had 2a hair themselves, there is no way that a person cannot understand the pain and humiliation black people have endured through generations.

I am a 3c/4a crown, haired natural who was told throughout childhood that it is a shame that I didn’t get my mother’s (3a) hair. I thought my hair was a “bad” grade. It wasn’t until I went natural, (2011) that I have ever been referred to as having decent or “good” hair.
Throughout my life I have known children who were constantly ridiculed for their “bad” hair. I have a coworker who wears her hair closely cropped but texturizes the top. I asked why she won’t just let that be natural as well. She replied, “I will never be natural. My hair is disgusting. I have bdb’s but you wouldn’t know about that. See you have good hair you can do that. Why would I ever walk around with my hair looking like a slave? I am a professional you know!” This coworker later complained to someone else that I was trying to make fun of her hair.

That woman’s hurt is real. It hurts me that she cannot realize that all types of natural hair is beautiful. But, I understand. It took years of taunting and teaching her that her hair was horrible for her to feel like this even in her mid- forties. How can I not acknowledge that? Our men have even been brainwashed to believe that even curly haired white women have better hair than black women. This self-hate runs too deep for us to just pretend that we have any connection with whites who may complain about frizz or curls.

I think it is just downright selfish for a white woman to insist on being a part of the movement and for black women to advocate for their rights. We are still hurting as a people to be accepted by our own. The people that make the most fun of or shun black hair are black themselves. We need to learn that our hair is ok and to heal ourselves from this self-hate disease. Then, we will be in a position to reach out to others.
I don’t blame the white girl who was interviewed. Whites do what we let them do. I blame blacks who don’t take a stand and make sure that our healing places and avenues are secure and protected.

I've changed my stanze. Originally, my opinion was that I didn't care, but after reading this, I was reminded of a few hurtful childhood experiences with my cousins of various hair textures and how outsiders pitted us against each other - "bad" hair vs "good" hair, light skin vs dark skin. We need to work out our issues amongst ourselves. At "home", if you will, in the spaces that we have created for ourselves.

I think this needs to be a blacks (African Descent) only club. They can go fight their own battles in their own spaces.

 

[EnExitStageLeft]

Channy31

Technically, my father would be considered "mixed". His mom is Jamaican and his dad was a white southerner. But he identifies as black. He's my complexion with 3Bish curls. Alot of people thought he was just a black man with "good hair" until he balded himself in the early 90's.

I said all of that to say this.....I'm a black woman with white blood and I still don't think they(Whites) have a placed in the natural community. It sounds harsh and maybe it is, but I don't care. We need our own outlet/domain. This is OURS and needs to stay that way.

So in essence, you're more then welcome......sista'.

 

[werenumber2]

I'm mixed too. My hair is 3a/b. I'm here and no one can tell me that I don't belong. Especially after I paid my $6.50.

Many people told me that I have that "good hair" and "it's so much easier for you". So? I don't give a flying fcuk if someone else's journey is harder or easier than mine. I'm on my own trip and it's just as real for me as their's is to them.

Besides, I was that one natural (or so it felt) in NYC in the 80/90s. Holding it down as hard as I could until the rest of my sisters caught up. There should be some points for that.

I remember discovering NC as a wee lass and absolutely loving it. I was surrounded by members whose hair looked like mine - women who taught me that shrinkage was a very real thing and not some strange phenomenon that only affected me. I entered the fabulously awful world of PJ-ism lol and was introduced to hair products, some of which I still use to this very day (if they haven't been discontinued ).

However, when I wanted some hair advice for my type 4 black girlfriends who were constantly struggling with their damaged, relaxed tresses, I knew NC (back in those days anyway) wasn't the place to get that information. That's when I broke out the big guns and joined Nappturality. I remember practically shaking in my boots as I made my first post and sheepishly asked if "my kind" was welcome there and explained my stance on wanting to help my friends discover the potential of their beautiful, healthy natural hair.

They basically laid it all out (as only NP members could do) and said that as long as I didn't regale them with curly-haired tales of "ugh it's SO annoying when people say I have good or pretty hair harrumph harrumph", I could hang. I ended up having a blast and learning so much from my "C-Napp" sistren.

That's also where I first heard about you lovely creamy-crack addicted, flaming hot tool of torture-using LHCF heathens.

 

[Channy31]

Channy31

Technically, my father would be considered "mixed". His mom is Jamaican and his dad was a white southerner. But he identifies as black. He's my complexion with 3Bish curls. Alot of people thought he was just a black man with "good hair" until he balded himself in the early 90's.

I said all of that to say this.....I'm a black woman with white blood and I still don't think they(Whites) have a placed in the natural community. It sounds harsh and maybe it is, but I don't care. We need our own outlet/domain. This is OURS and needs to stay that way.

So in essence, you're more then welcome......sista'.

Makes a lot of sense
Yay haha!

 

[curlicarib]

I remember discovering NC as a wee lass and absolutely loving it. I was surrounded by members whose hair looked like mine - women who taught me that shrinkage was a very real thing and not some strange phenomenon that only affected me. I entered the fabulously awful world of PJ-ism lol and was introduced to hair products, some of which I still use to this very day (if they haven't been discontinued ).

However, when I wanted some hair advice for my type 4 black girlfriends who were constantly struggling with their damaged, relaxed tresses, I knew NC (back in those days anyway) wasn't the place to get that information. That's when I broke out the big guns and joined Nappturality. I remember practically shaking in my boots as I made my first post and sheepishly asked if "my kind" was welcome there and explained my stance on wanting to help my friends discover the potential of their beautiful, healthy natural hair.

They basically laid it all out (as only NP members could do) and said that as long as I didn't regale them with curly-haired tales of "ugh it's SO annoying when people say I have good or pretty hair harrumph harrumph", I could hang. I ended up having a blast and learning so much from my "C-Napp" sistren.

That's also where I first heard about you lovely creamy-crack addicted, flaming hot tool of torture-using LHCF heathens.

Girl, you're better than me! I tried to hang over in Napptrality, but they were a little to militant for me. It's a good website and I still dip in occassionally to see what's up, but they made me feel like I was out of line if I ever brought up type 3 hair. Like I purposely chose what grows out of my head. After being snapped at a few times, I resigned myself to lurking over there.

 

[Froreal3]

Channy31

I don't think you've offended anyone. They're responding this way because it seems obvious that you would not be excluded just because you're biracial.

Also some definitions:

Passing: When a person of a particular race pretends to be of another race for various reasons. During slavery days in America and in other countries, fair skinned black people or mixed people use to sometimes pass as white temporarily or permanently depending on the circumstance. The movie Imitation of Life is about this phenomenon. It's a good film.

NC = Naturally Curly. Website create by women (white) for curly haired women.

Brand New = a Black American term that means acting obtusely or pretending as if you aren't aware.

"Stuck with us TBH" = Stuck with us to be honest. MzMomo was just saying you're stuck with "us" (meaning black women) in this issue.

 

[Channy31]

Channy31

I don't think you've offended anyone. They're responding this way because it seems obvious that you would not be excluded just because you're biracial.

Also some definitions:

Passing: When a person of a particular race pretends to be of another race for various reasons. During slavery days in America and in other countries, fair skinned black people or mixed people use to sometimes pass as white temporarily or permanently depending on the circumstance. The movie Imitation of Life is about this phenomenon. It's a good film.

NC = Naturally Curly. Website create by women (white) for curly haired women.

Brand New = a Black American term that means acting obtusely or pretending as if you aren't aware.

"Stuck with us TBH" = Stuck with us to be honest. MzMomo was just saying you're stuck with "us" (meaning black women) in this issue.

I see, I'm actually quite glad then
Thanks for expelling those terms.. want to watch that film now

 

[curlicarib]

@Channy31

I don't think you've offended anyone. They're responding this way because it seems obvious that you would not be excluded just because you're biracial.

Also some definitions:

Passing: When a person of a particular race pretends to be of another race for various reasons. During slavery days in America and in other countries, fair skinned black people or mixed people use to sometimes pass as white temporarily or permanently depending on the circumstance. The movie Imitation of Life is about this phenomenon. It's a good film.

NC = Naturally Curly. Website create by women (white) for curly haired women.

Brand New = a Black American term that means acting obtusely or pretending as if you aren't aware.

"Stuck with us TBH" = Stuck with us to be honest. MzMomo was just saying you're stuck with "us" (meaning black women) in this issue.

LOL! Look at you mama, teaching Modern Jive 101.

 

[Jewell]

See, had I kept reading I wouldnt even have needed to say anything!!

But wtf is a "octaroons"?!?!?!?

Never mind. Googled it. Had not clue there was a word for being 1/8th black. That there is enough proof we need this for us and only us! They have a special word for being 1/8th German when the rest of you is English? A word of you're German and 1/8th Scottish? Do they have words for that? Or was that created just for us??? Cause we cant seem to have nothing to our self except for labels to remind us that we arent them!

Lol Indeed, there are many b.s. words out there for having a portion of your ancestry be Black or African. Quadroons are 1/4th Black. It's some mess!

Channy31

No offense taken dear! My parents are of varied heritage as well, and my father grew up in Germany. So I totally understand. I just do not like to see more divisive tendencies and labels used amongst us, the group who has been torn apart the most. Thanks for your response. We're all here to share, talk, and learn in freedom!

 

[DoDo]

I am angered by the fact that anyone would argue for inclusion in the natural hair movement. Unless a person has lived all of their life around whites and had 2a hair themselves, there is no way that a person cannot understand the pain and humiliation black people have endured through generations.

I am a 3c/4a crown, haired natural who was told throughout childhood that it is a shame that I didn’t get my mother’s (3a) hair. I thought my hair was a “bad” grade. It wasn’t until I went natural, (2011) that I have ever been referred to as having decent or “good” hair.
Throughout my life I have known children who were constantly ridiculed for their “bad” hair. I have a coworker who wears her hair closely cropped but texturizes the top. I asked why she won’t just let that be natural as well. She replied, “I will never be natural. My hair is disgusting. I have bdb’s but you wouldn’t know about that. See you have good hair you can do that. Why would I ever walk around with my hair looking like a slave? I am a professional you know!” This coworker later complained to someone else that I was trying to make fun of her hair.

That woman’s hurt is real. It hurts me that she cannot realize that all types of natural hair is beautiful. But, I understand. It took years of taunting and teaching her that her hair was horrible for her to feel like this even in her mid- forties. How can I not acknowledge that? Our men have even been brainwashed to believe that even curly haired white women have better hair than black women. This self-hate runs too deep for us to just pretend that we have any connection with whites who may complain about frizz or curls.

I think it is just downright selfish for a white woman to insist on being a part of the movement and for black women to advocate for their rights. We are still hurting as a people to be accepted by our own. The people that make the most fun of or shun black hair are black themselves. We need to learn that our hair is ok and to heal ourselves from this self-hate disease. Then, we will be in a position to reach out to others.
I don’t blame the white girl who was interviewed. Whites do what we let them do. I blame blacks who don’t take a stand and make sure that our healing places and avenues are secure and protected.

 

[Chanteuse]

I've changed my stanze. Originally, my opinion was that I didn't care, but after reading this, I was reminded of a few hurtful childhood experiences with my cousins of various hair textures and how outsiders pitted us against each other - "bad" hair vs "good" hair, light skin vs dark skin. We need to work out our issues amongst ourselves. At "home", if you will, in the spaces that we have created for ourselves.

I think this needs to be a blacks (African Descent) only club. They can go fight their own battles in their own spaces.

Aw - yay!! I've been primarily lurking in these threads but I love that the message is being heard and received.

 

[curlicarib]

Aw - yay!! I've been primarily lurking in these threads but I love that the message is being heard and received.

LOL! Thanks for the love!!

It's not that I didn't understand or wasn't getting the message. The truth of the matter is that I'm really a "live and let live" kind of girl. As long as no small children and farm animals are being hurt, I'm all about letting people work it out themsleves. But then I read the other threads and checked out the various blogs and saw that these women aren't looking for inclusion, they are looking to bogart what does not belong to them. Oh. H3LL. NAW! You can't negotiate with the devil.