Interabled Youtube Couple

[1QTPie]

The white couple somehow ended up on my recommended page on YouTube. I watched 2.5 of their videos and I just could no longer think positive thoughts.

This is understandable if they were both able bodied and some accident cause him to become disabled. But she sought him out, contacted him, and traveled to meet him after falling in love with his blog.

Something in the buttermilk ain’t clean...

I watched a few more of their videos to see if she was some sorta creep. She seems normal, but the type to want to be a caregiver or mother in the relationship. I wonder if her exes were highly dependent upon her as well.


As far as the couple in the O.P., I have so many questions. So many thoughts.

 

[PeaceFlow]

I don't have any problem with these types of couples.

However I do wonder if there are some extra motivations on the woman's part. Similar to love after lockup Sometimes when the man is bound by something, or other it makes them feel safer in love.

 

[DST1913]

I watched some of their vids. They look at each other like pure love. Yes it's a lot for a 20 something but I think they genuinely love each other. They are both attractive with bubbly personalities. The questions I had was if he wasn't injured would he have dated interacially and his parents be so receptive and do they have sex? They answered the sex question and said his body parts work so yup they do. Hes not like Steven Hawking or Chistopher Reeves quadriplegic and there are a lot of things he can do including drive. I have no issues with this. Mostly everyone is worthy of love

 

[Transformer]

The questions I had was if he wasn't injured would he have dated interacially and his parents be so receptive

This is me.

 

[**SaSSy**]

start at the 12:10 mark


On a social status viewpoint, I can see why she is with him.

 

[hopeful]

No. Race isn’t the issue. I just wouldn’t want to be in a relationship with anyone with whom I’d be in a caretaker type of position. He’s a cutie pie though and seems to have a very nice personality. Also, a quadriplegic is a person affected by paralysis of all four limbs. So I’m confused about the description. This guy seems to have full use of his hands/arms/shoulders, etc.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

Is he rich? Do I have better options?

There's already a thread on this couple.

 

[Petal26]

Is he disgustingly rich? Does he have caretakers and doesn't expect me to do anything, but show up? Can he, ahem.... please me in some way? So many questions.

 

[Bette Davis Eyes]

Is he well off? What do you mean by social status? I didn't watch the video. At work currently.

 

[**SaSSy**]

Is he rich? Do I have better options?

There's already a thread on this couple.

Oh yea, could you link the thread

 

[Crackers Phinn]

Oh yea, could you link the thread

https://longhaircareforum.com/threads/interabled-youtube-couple.841183/#post-25046213

 

[Ganjababy]

Is he a multimillionaire? Otherwise I don’t get this. Sorry

 

[Miss_C]

I’m wondering if it’s some type of fetish/control/martyr thing for the able bodied person? They’re getting something out of it psychologically.

It’s like when someone dates/marries someone who is so large they’re bed bound. And if the disabled person ever decided they wanted the relationship to end, they can’t just pack a bag and leave.

You must have never seen Degrassi where Wheelchair Jimmy dissed his able bodied girl for a new ablebodied girl and told her to get over it. He couldn’t even get an erection.

It’s fiction but that’s rooted in something. A man is a man is a man.

 

[intellectualuva]

Is he a multimillionaire? Otherwise I don’t get this. Sorry

I had questions too and watched a bunch to understand what was going on here. I was sorta too embarrassed to come back in here when I thought OP misspelled interracial.

His family seems to do well enough. They dropped 25k on an elective 20-minute surgery that would give him more ability to control his bladder. He's had a enough support to go from full paralysis to being able to move in some ways. I am not going to rewatch, but I think he said either L1 or L2 or L2 and L3...etc. Whatever it is, it's not full use of both arms, but enough to feed and drive.

The parents were also able to retrofit the house to create an apartment and office for him/them and get him a decent SUV that he is able to drive on his own. He studied neuroscience in college and is developing technology that will help him walk on his own. He demos it in one of the videos. I think they (he, his family) are using this platform to get more attention and support from a larger organization in which case his earnings should be tremendous. Or this platform is about money/attention/exposure to get into other quad studies or something. Their platform is growing very quickly, mostly because not only are they interabled they are interracial. They (or She) doesn't seem to realize that the latter is just as important as the former, if not more.

Charisma is getting a degree in an adjacent field and was working in that field. I want to see how all of this benefits her, but I don't see it yet. She used to work at the place where Cole is doing research and rehab, but the platform gives them enough where she doesn't have to work, she can focus on school. They/She talked about men hitting on her at one of the events (neuro or quad-related) he attends for his individual platform. Lol.

I agree she is beautiful and can do much better. I hope she doesn't feel stuck when she wants out. Their families really do like each other.

Oh and she is first black girl Cole has dated. He dated another woman (white) from his old hs after his accident and it didn't work out. Sooooooooo

 

[intellectualuva]

I have some seriously unPC thoughts about this arrangement but I don't want the nurses to get mad at me. I'm tryna start 2019 slightly less pervy than I ended 2018.

I think people were definitely wondering because their intimacy video had some interesting comments. They don't go into detail, but there is enough information to answer the questions I think you have.

 

[Bette Davis Eyes]

Looks like they are engaged.

 

[CarefreeinChicago]

I am lazy I don’t think I can be in a relationship like this

 

[quirkydimples]

My heart is not warmed by this. She is too young and cute to be with a guy who can not bathe himself. People really do go looking for struggle.

Your comment has me howling!

Edit: Just realized this is an old thread. My comment stands, though.

 

[intellectualuva]

Looks like they are engaged.

I was just watching their videos today, I didnt see this.

I hope not. I was hoping they would wait for 2 year mark. Let me check. Lol.

 

[hunnychile]

When I was younger I could easily see myself in a situation like this but I have a tremendous heart. Everybody ain’t able. Pun, while incredibley appropriate, not intended.

I hope they continue to find happiness together.

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

Bumping this old thread. I just started watching these 2. At first, my heart was warmed. Now I am concerned for Charisma. She dropped out of OT school, and she just looks tired. I hope things are ok for her.

 

[intellectualuva]

Bumping this old thread. I just started watching these 2. At first, my heart was warmed. Now I am concerned for Charisma. She dropped out of OT school, and she just looks tired. I hope things are ok for her.

They just got married too.

I knew she wasn't staying in school when she seemed to be over that 2hr-3hr drive more than anything and I think threw herself into youtube stuff. I wish her (and him because he seems to adore her) the best, but I wouldn't want this for my young beautiful daughter with a bright future.

 

[Rocky91]

Dropped out of school? This man isn’t a millionaire? I wish them well.

 

[msdeevee]

I’ve watched a couple of their videos over the years. They’re cute but I can’t help but feel a little sorry for both of them when I see them so I’ve only watched a couple of their vids.

I don’t think I could do this With someone I’m just meeting that is a quadriplegic.

I watched one a while back where both their parents went to a fair with them and they all seemed cool and accepting but I wonder how her parents really feel behind closed doors. Most parents want what’s best for their child.

Does she have to change his diapers or does he have colostomy bags?
I know TMI , but I don’t think I could do it.

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

I’ve watched a couple of their videos over the years. They’re cute but I can’t help but feel a little sorry for both of them when I see them so I’ve only watched a couple of their vids.

I don’t think I could do this With someone I’m just meeting that is a quadriplegic.

I watched one a while back where both their parents went to a fair with them and they all seemed cool and accepting but I wonder how her parents really feel behind closed doors. Most parents want what’s best for their child.

Does she have to change his diapers or does he have colostomy bags?
I know TMI , but I don’t think I could do it.

He had some kind of Botox procedure where he can hold his uurine better and has to be cathed. For poops, he’s on some kind of program where I think they stimulate him to poop on a schedule. She helps him on to the toilet and helps him off after. I think he goes every other day.

 

[Rastafarai]

I’ve watched a couple of their videos over the years. They’re cute but I can’t help but feel a little sorry for both of them when I see them so I’ve only watched a couple of their vids.

I don’t think I could do this With someone I’m just meeting that is a quadriplegic.

I watched one a while back where both their parents went to a fair with them and they all seemed cool and accepting but I wonder how her parents really feel behind closed doors. Most parents want what’s best for their child.

Does she have to change his diapers or does he have colostomy bags?
I know TMI , but I don’t think I could do it.

I can only see myself doing this if my husband became quadriplegic. I made vows and intend to uphold them.

But to willingly walk into this? Naw.

Dropped out of school? This man isn’t a millionaire? I wish them well.

Craziness. If he really cared for her, he would not have encouraged this foolishness. Her whole future gone up in flames. And may I add I am a bit more miffed that she is giving this all up for a Caucasian man. All sorts of feelings are running through me. SMDH.

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

I can only see myself doing this if my husband became quadriplegic. I made vows and intend to uphold them.

But to willingly walk into this? Naw.



Craziness. If he really cared for her, he would not have encouraged this foolishness. Her whole future gone up in flames. And may I add I am a bit more miffed that she is giving this all up for a Caucasian man. All sorts of feelings are running through me. SMDH.

Dropped out of school? This man isn’t a millionaire? I wish them well.

Here’s the video where she explains it. Cole makes a BIG point of emphasizing that it was her decision. She also said her parents were ok with it. I personally would not ever back my unmarried daughter giving up school for a man with only a year left.



Something else that has thrown me off about Cole is how he says he loves black people. He has said this like 2 times that I’ve heard on the videos. It triggered my radar.

 

[kimpaur]

Here’s the video where she explains it. Cole makes a BIG point of emphasizing that it was her decision. She also said her parents were ok with it. I personally would not ever back my unmarried daughter giving up school for a man with only a year left.



Something else that has thrown me off about Cole is how he says he loves black people. He has said this like 2 times that I’ve heard on the videos. It triggered my radar.

Didn’t she already get married(hence the ring)?

At this point this is a grown married woman and all this faux outrage is pointless

I watched the above video and if you read between the lines, it sounds like YouTube is getting them a pretty big bag and she wants to foray that into a nonprofit and go back to school later so she can do that. It sounds like they did a TED Talk too, which is a pretty big deal.

I know us black folks preach education but if sis is getting the bag without it and having that huge reach she wants...is it really necessary(though she did say she wants to go back)?Plus, the stress put her in the hospital, yeah ,no.

It sounds like she knows exactly what she’s doing (or thinks she does) and the way her hubbs was emphatically shaking his head when she said she doesn’t think She needs to work a 9-5 , it sounds like her partner is supportive enough to make it happen regardless(and she said he apparently has several nonprofits ,which I’ve heard can be lucrative for some )

Ive pretty much only seen this and their support dog video, but they seem happy and wholesome *shrug

 

[B_Phlyy]

Dropped out of school? This man isn’t a millionaire? I wish them well.

I should not be laughing but yes, this would be my only reason for going along. And even then, it would be iffy. I'm just thinking of the restaurant scene in The Upside and how she was still like "I can't do this".

I can only see myself doing this if my husband became quadriplegic. I made vows and intend to uphold them.

But to willingly walk into this? Naw.



Craziness. If he really cared for her, he would not have encouraged this foolishness. Her whole future gone up in flames. And may I add I am a bit more miffed that she is giving this all up for a Caucasian man. All sorts of feelings are running through me. SMDH.

Totally understand. She's young, cute, in great shape, and educated. He shouldn't be a dating/marriage option, at most he should be a good friend.

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

Didn’t she already get married(hence the ring)?

At this point this is a grown married woman and all this faux outrage is pointless

I watched the above video and if you read between the lines, it sounds like YouTube is getting them a pretty big bag and she wants to foray that into a nonprofit and go back to school later so she can do that. It sounds like they did a TED Talk too, which is a pretty big deal.

I know us black folks preach education but if sis is getting the bag without it and having that huge reach she wants...is it really necessary(though she did say she wants to go back)?Plus, the stress put her in the hospital, yeah ,no.

It sounds like she knows exactly what she’s doing (or thinks she does) and the way her hubbs was emphatically shaking his head when she said she doesn’t think She needs to work a 9-5 , it sounds like her partner is supportive enough to make it happen regardless(and she said he apparently has several nonprofits ,which I’ve heard can be lucrative for some )

Ive pretty much only seen this and their support dog video, but they seem happy and wholesome *shrug

Yes, the stress of being in school and a care giver, renovating the house to accommodate your special needs boyfriend and running a /YouTube channel would be enough to put one in the hospital.


I don’t doubt that charisma is sincere. I am worried about Cole and his confederate flag waving relatives. Tho I’m sure they will put up with a lot to have him cared for.


She was not married in the video above.

but you’re right, she’s a grown, now married woman. I really do hope she gets all the happiness she deserves.