I'm going back...

[monieluv]

I'm contemplating going back to relaxer. My hair has been in the worst state ever being natural. Don't get me wrong. I've had some good hair days, but very few and too, too far between. My hair was better, healthier, softer, and more manageable being relaxer. Not to mention that I have never in my life experienced split ends and breakage until I became natural . You all was right. Everything it's for everybody. Thank you all for your support. Hopefully, it will continue.

 

[Je Ne Sais Quoi]

I'm contemplating going back to relaxer. My hair has been in the worst state ever being natural. Don't get me wrong. I've had some good hair days, but very few and too, too far between. My hair was better, healthier, softer, and more manageable being relaxer. Not to mention that I have never in my life experienced split ends and breakage until I became natural . You all was right. Everything it's for everybody. Thank you all for your support. Hopefully, it will continue.

I feel you. I've thought about it as well over the last year but I've not done it. Actually my natural hair hasn't been much of a problem, it's just when I try to wear straight styles that i get my panties in a bunch. Anyway, maybe you aren't using the right products and techniques on your natural hair? What is your regimen?

 

[gloomgeisha]

Anyway, maybe you aren't using the right products and techniques on your natural hair? What is your regimen?

And hair type? The first year of being natural was a big learning process for me. I went through tons of products, was relegated to a headband or a TWA (because I didn't know any styles) and was dependent on really expensive products, or cheap crap products, or products that were expensive and still crap. It's a learning experience, especially if you're used to having to care for manage relaxed hair.

It gets easier with time, patience, and experimentation. Let us help you

 

[MzLady78]

Girl, I so feel you.

I just braided my hair up because I was thisclose to either relaxing or texlaxing.

 

[likewtr4chklit]

Hey girl, you're on LHCF the best resource for black hair of all types. If you went natural it must have been for a reason, so don't give up yet. Reach out to the natural sistahs on here and see what help they can give you. But of course if you still decide to want to relax again, you will still have the same amount of support.

 

[*closer*2*my*dreams*]

I too feel like this at times, but like everyone else said, you have to have patience and learn what your natural hair needs as opposed to your relaxed hair. This was my dillema because I was so used to caring for my relaxed hair that i was trying to use the same products that probably caused more harm than good. My major dilema is trying to care for BOTH at the same time (i'm transitioning and I refuse to cut off my relaxed ends). so i have to be careful with what products i apply to each section (and to make matters worse, i think i have 3 different hair types growing in and i swear it's like having 3 kids!! they each want something different)!.

 

[scarcity21]

Girl, I so feel you.

I just braided my hair up because I was thisclose to either relaxing or texlaxing.

OT but ur braids look great!!! u did a fab job

 

[monieluv]

I feel you. I've thought about it as well over the last year but I've not done it. Actually my natural hair hasn't been much of a problem, it's just when I try to wear straight styles that i get my panties in a bunch. Anyway, maybe you aren't using the right products and techniques on your natural hair? What is your regimen?

believe me, i've everything under the sun and changed my regimen many times within the last year. pre-poo, poo, c/w, dc, and trim quarterly. tried mnt, mtg, ntm, suave, jbco, olive oil, cococut oil, jojoba, she butter, etc... the list goes on and on. when i relaxed and didn't about this site, i poo and dc weekly, grease my scalp mon, wed, and fri, and used lv-in con and moisturizer daily. that's it; that simple. and my hair thrived. i only went natural b/c my hair got damaged from relaxer and perm within a month time and there was no repair. besides i wanted to try something different.

 

[monieluv]

And hair type? The first year of being natural was a big learning process for me. I went through tons of products, was relegated to a headband or a TWA (because I didn't know any styles) and was dependent on really expensive products, or cheap crap products, or products that were expensive and still crap. It's a learning experience, especially if you're used to having to care for manage relaxed hair.

It gets easier with time, patience, and experimentation. Let us help you

funny you should say that. that's where i'm at now. stuck on twa, headbands, braids, weave, and wigs. this process is taking too long. but one thing i can say. i'm conquering one personal challenge (12 month no cutting) ; i haven't cut my hair at all this year. just trimmed, rather dusted, every three months.

 

[monieluv]

Hey girl, you're on LHCF the best resource for black hair of all types. If you went natural it must have been for a reason, so don't give up yet. Reach out to the natural sistahs on here and see what help they can give you. But of course if you still decide to want to relax again, you will still have the same amount of support.

thank you.

 

[hopeful]

Whatever you decide I wish you the best. If you decide to texturizre/texlax/fully relax, just do lots of research and do test sections first to determine the length of time you need to leave the relaxer on. When you go natural oftentimes your hair will become more resistant to relaxers. And remember whatever you decide to do, you can always go natural again or relax again, hair is supposed to be fun, you should be happy at least most of the time. I do agree with the ladies that it takes time to learn your hair. Good luck.

 

[Gigi-07]

Good luck! I know from personal experience that not everything is for everyone. I could not handle being natural , too much time, too much stress. As a student, that much dedication to hair was impractical.

 

[Bubblingbrownshuga]

I feel like this everyday, but...

1. What were your reasons for going natural?
2. Try to make your natural hair fun, ie try different products, techniques, etc
3. What do you believe a relaxer would do for your hair? Will you still be frustrated with it?
4. What do you like about being natural?
5. How would your hair look with a relaxer? Thin? Uneven?

These are some of the many statements and questions I have in my mind daily to keep me from relaxing.

 

[ScarletPhoenix]

I'm contemplating going back to relaxer. My hair has been in the worst state ever being natural. Don't get me wrong. I've had some good hair days, but very few and too, too far between. My hair was better, healthier, softer, and more manageable being relaxer. Not to mention that I have never in my life experienced split ends and breakage until I became natural . You all was right. Everything it's for everybody. Thank you all for your support. Hopefully, it will continue.

I feel you on this one. My decision to go natural was a personal and I felt that my decision to texlax should be just that. My hair was very coarse thick and started breaking in the crown area. The only time that I could get it to look decent was by wetting and it and although co-washing did wonders for me wet, once my hair was dry it was a whole different story. Gorgeous on day 1 looking like hell on day 2. Sure maybe I didn't find the right products but honestly with my relaxed hair it just seemed so much easier. I never got t/u every 8 weeks anyway. More like every 12. So I texlaxed my hair back in Jan and then did another in August. Now I won't be waiting that long this time, I believe that every 4th month is good for me. I will be here to support you and I am sure that every woman here at LHCF will have your back as well!

 

[BrooklynSouth]

I'm contemplating going back to relaxer. My hair has been in the worst state ever being natural. Don't get me wrong. I've had some good hair days, but very few and too, too far between. My hair was better, healthier, softer, and more manageable being relaxer. Not to mention that I have never in my life experienced split ends and breakage until I became natural . You all was right. Everything it's for everybody. Thank you all for your support. Hopefully, it will continue.

Monieluv, that is why I will not Big Chop. I'd hate to go twa after years of growth then decide I cannot handle it anymore. Months have passed since I've relaxed and it really depends on the day how I'm feeling about my natural roots..sometimes soft as cotton, other days I'm dreadlocked like crazyerplexed.

 

[RedVelvet310]

I feel you sis...

I am seriously contemplating texlaxing my hair. I'm starting to really dislike fake hair (I never really liked it that much in the first place) and unless its straightened.. styling my natural hair is near impossible, If it was up to me I'd be doing WnGs everyday and baggying everynight (my hair really grows when I baggy.. above nape length stretched to below SL stretch in 6 months while baggying on and off). But as soon as my hair dries it's a tangled mess that I DEFINITELY will not rock in public. Grr the frustrations

 

[monieluv]

I feel you on this one. My decision to go natural was a personal and I felt that my decision to texlax should be just that. My hair was very coarse thick and started breaking in the crown area. The only time that I could get it to look decent was by wetting and it and although co-washing did wonders for me wet, once my hair was dry it was a whole different story. Gorgeous on day 1 looking like hell on day 2. Sure maybe I didn't find the right products but honestly with my relaxed hair it just seemed so much easier. I never got t/u every 8 weeks anyway. More like every 12. So I texlaxed my hair back in Jan and then did another in August. Now I won't be waiting that long this time, I believe that every 4th month is good for me. I will be here to support you and I am sure that every woman here at LHCF will have your back as well!

your story sounds too much like mine. thank you for the support.

 

[monieluv]

i really appreciate all of your comments. i've already tried some of the advice you all are suggesting. i went from natural to texturized to texlax'd. think the problem was that i was doing too much. being a government employee, my hair have to be a certain way (not unkempt). you don't know how i long to rock my own hair chemical-free. sporting twists and coils, trying new things. one day this will come. until then, i'm going back to the drawing board (relaxed).

 

[SignatureBeauty]

For some people it is easy to go natural, for some it is not, some go natural just to see their texture, some go for other reasons, I went natural because I wanted to and my relaxed hair always looked fine, not thin,breaking or shedding. I feel it is your personal choice of what you want to do. I mean we all have different textures of hair on our heads, some more looser, some more tighter, some more drier, and it can become expensive because you are trying to find that product to keep your dry hair moisturized throughout the day.

Starting from a twa is the most hardest way for most to go natural, especially if you have had long hair, I say try to transition, because you will wear that Twa for a long time and yes it does gets boring, headbands get boring, somtimes twist on short hair don't look good, everyone can't afford braids, and wigs and weaves become too expensive and uncomfortable. But I am not speaking for everyone. Some people are just not ready to commit to going natural and it is OKAY! They tried it and didn't like it, so what? You have to do what makes you happy, if relaxing is it then so be it.

When your hair is longer I feel that it becomes easier, But I can understand how styling issues can be a problem, But again some have the patience and some don't! There are so many women on here of all textures that are natural & relaxed! so you have options!
Good Luck with whatever you want to do with your hair!

 

[nappysunflowers]

I agree with SignatureBeauty. Normally, I would say something like, don't give in to the chemicals...run from the perm as fast as you can. Then, I realized I can't tell you what to do. I, and any other poster, can only support your decision. So, I hope it works out natural, perm, pressed, or somewhere in between. Just take care of it no matter what...