I've decided....I'm relaxing

Think carefully about the decision.

I relaxed, mostly, because of the professional environment I was in. I didn't see any women with natural hair, and I needed to fit in *sad, I know*. Also, I enjoy the manageability of my relaxed hair.
 
Ms_Twana said:
I'll do more research on BKT, because I don't know much about it. I may even order Phyto and have her use that. Are you texlaxed or natural??
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I am sure that you will make the right decision for you, no matter what it is. I just wanted to throw that out there because I just see see so many women who relax and then regret it.

I'm transitioning actually (13 months). I was relaxed bone-straight, then texlaxed (without realizing it) for about 2 years.
 
Ms_Twana said:
Thanks. I didn't think of that. I was debating whether or not I wanted her to process it completely.


Well, I got to the salon, and my stylist wasn't there yet. So I called her. How bout she forgot and I had to reschedule for tomorrow. So now I'm like, was that a sign?!?! :lachen:

So for those of you that are texlaxed, do you still have to use a lot of heat to straighten?? In another thread, someone suggested that I just relax bone straight because texlaxing requires more heat to straighten. So, using a lot of heat on top of the chemical would not be good. What do you think?
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I use less heat as a texlaxer as opposed to being natural. I would assume though if you went bone straight it would take less heat than texlaxing. In my humble opinion, i don't think you'll be happy with bone straight hair, i could be way off base though
 
I was natural for almost 10 years. I relaxed and now I am going natural again.

Don't make the decision from a state of frustration. You have to have a clear mind. Remember why you went natural in the first place.

Even though you see people on here with healthy perms, that may or may not happen with you. Some people's hair cannot take chemicals no matter how well they take care of it.

In the end, it is just hair. If you don't like it, you will just have to start over.
 
Ms. Twana,

Why did you relax?

I was natural for 9 years and I got sick of wet buns, ponytails and just dealing with my hair. I have very thick hair per square inch, it has a strong (resistant) wave pattern on top and curls underneath (3b/c-ish). I grew my hair to WL, had to block off 2 hours to flatiron only to have the humidity undo my hair in a matter of 3 minutes (black cotton candy).

How did you prepare your hair before you got the relaxer?
Protein (Aphogee) a week or so before relaxing. Last year I only relaxed twice.

How have you maintained the health of ur hair (Regimen)?

I tex-re-laxed only twice last year. I pre-poo with ORS Hair Mayo. Shampoo, condition and leave in Tresemme heat protectant, Salerm-21 and Sabino Moisture Block then flatiron. After that I no more heat, I just wrap it every night until the next wash.

Can u see progress since relaxing?

Oh yes! I got a trim in March 2009 and I had hadn't been to that particular stylist since Sept. She was AMAZED at how much my hair had grown. Little does she know that I had 2 trims and 1 CUT during that 6 month period..lol.

What relaxer did you use?

ORS Lye and I've used ORS No-Lye

Do u think u will go back to being a natural?

I haven't tex-laxed since Oct. I just did a BKT (last week and I LOVE LOVE LOVE IT) so I'll have to see how my natural hair responds. If it reverts there's no way I'm going natural. If it doesn't I may forego the relaxers. The BKT has made styling my hair so easy!!! I dried my hair in 12 MINUTES under the dryer (usually 30-45 to dry before I flatiron instead of blowdrying). I flatironed in 23 minutes flat (instead of an hour)!!!!


If I think of more I will add them. TIA!!!
 
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taz007 said:
Wow! :nono:
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I did my BKT and I didn't use that much heat or go over it 10 times:nono:. I LOVE IT!!!!!!

I did about 420 degrees and went over about 5 times. I did 400-410 around my edges. It has a heat protectant in it and you don't damage your hair. After that intial heat you don't have to use a flatiron anymore to get silky results!!!
 
lashannasmall said:
Don't make the decision from a state of frustration. You have to have a clear mind. Remember why you went natural in the first place.

Even though you see people on here with healthy perms, that may or may not happen with you. Some people's hair cannot take chemicals no matter how well they take care of it.

In the end, it is just hair. If you don't like it, you will just have to start over.
Click to expand...

You're right, I am frustrated. But, I am also debating this with a clear mind...NOW!!! :lachen:See, I've only been natural for 2.5 years. The rest of my life, I've been relaxed. So, I'm not worried about my hair not being able to take the chemicals. My reason for going natural was 1. so that I could see if my hair would grow longer than the "a little past shoulder length" that it had been for years, and 2. to experience my hair natural. Okay, been there, done that now, my hair is now APL!!! :lachen::lachen:So now I'm ready to venture back.

Veejee said:
I did my BKT and I didn't use that much heat or go over it 10 times:nono:. I LOVE IT!!!!!!

I did about 420 degrees and went over about 5 times. I did 400-410 around my edges. It has a heat protectant in it and you don't damage your hair. After that intial heat you don't have to use a flatiron anymore to get silky results!!!
Click to expand...

See, I guess I don't understand the purpose of the BKT when you already have a relaxer. (I wasn't meaning YOU specifically, just generally speaking). Wouldn't blow drying and flat ironing without all of that just get the job done? I guess for those that are relaxed bone straight.

Another reason that I know I won't be doing the BKT is because I would STILL have to deal with the THICK/COARSE hair on wash days. Just like I would if I stayed natural and just straightened. That's where I am now. It's not about what it takes to care for my hair anymore; because I realize that chemically treated and non chemically treated hair has to be taken care of. Now, it's dealing with all of this on wash days that I no longer want to deal with. And if I'm going to take care of my hair, I will need to wash/co-wash frequently. Right now I HATE washing my hair, so I don't do it as often. And at this point, I want my hair to be less dense when I do.

So, the decision to use a chemical has been made. Now I just need to decide if I want to go bone straight or not. :perplexed
 
Veejee said:
Why did you relax?

....I got sick of wet buns, ponytails and just dealing with my hair. I have very thick hair per square inch, it has a strong (resistant) wave pattern on top and curls underneath (3b/c-ish). I grew my hair to WL, had to block off 2 hours to flatiron only to have the humidity undo my hair in a matter of 3 minutes (black cotton candy).
Click to expand...

The bolded is me, only it took me 3-3 1/2 hours to straighten mines and the humidity got to it before I even finished my hair!!! :nono:

I even considered just going to a stylist to get it straightened on a regular basis so that she could "train" my hair. I thought, "well at least that would straighten sections of my hair and it wouldn't be as much to deal with." I snapped outta that REAL QUICK!!! :lachen:I'd rather use a chemical, PLUS only go to a stylist a couple times a year, versus a couple times a week.
 
Ms_Twana said:
Okay. I know that there are ladies that relaxed after being natural. I need you ladies to chime in here, please. I just can not handle the thickness and courseness of my hair in its natural state anymore. It just takes WAY too much to wash and style it, unless I do a ponytail all the time. I love twists and twistouts, and they became my staple; but they are too time consuming for me. So, if I'm not rocking the cute natural styles that I went natural for, why stay natural? I miss having straight flowing hair. But even straightening my natural hair is too time consuming for me, then it reverts. So, I have decided to just relax again. Plus, I have learned how to better care for my relaxed hair now, thanks to LHCF.

So, my questions to all of those that have relaxed after being natural are below:

Why did you relax?
How did you prepare your hair before you got the relaxer?
How have you maintained the health of ur hair (Regimen)?
Can u see progress since relaxing?
What relaxer did you use?
Do u think u will go back to being a natural?

If I think of more I will add them. TIA!!!

ETA: Keep in mind, I've was relaxed for most of my life. So I know my hair can handle the relaxer, it's just how I care for it that makes or breaks me.
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MS Twana, you got to do what you got to do. I was in the same exact boat as you. THICK COARSE *** hair! Tired of dealing with all the drama and work as it got longer! Had my first perm when I was in 3rd grade. Went natural when I was 24 was natural for 3 years came to the crossroad (last year) where you now stand and said I couldn't handle this natural abundance anymore! I slapped 2 $7 perms on my head and was weirded out when I washed it out how thin my hair was! I had forgotten how thin permed hair felt! I liked the perm for a minute. But I'm not going to lie I miss my natural hair big time. I permed regularly for a year. And now I'm 6 months into a transition and I feel like I spent this past year and a half in limbo! I can't wait to be natural again! But I guess I had to relax to really see how much more I love my natural hair than my relaxed hair. Natural hair is definately a challenge though. Good Luck on your decision.
 
Ms_Twana said:
You're right, I am frustrated. But, I am also debating this with a clear mind...NOW!!! :lachen:See, I've only been natural for 2.5 years. The rest of my life, I've been relaxed. So, I'm not worried about my hair not being able to take the chemicals. My reason for going natural was 1. so that I could see if my hair would grow longer than the "a little past shoulder length" that it had been for years, and 2. to experience my hair natural. Okay, been there, done that now, my hair is now APL!!! :lachen::lachen:So now I'm ready to venture back.



See, I guess I don't understand the purpose of the BKT when you already have a relaxer. (I wasn't meaning YOU specifically, just generally speaking). Wouldn't blow drying and flat ironing without all of that just get the job done? I guess for those that are relaxed bone straight.

Another reason that I know I won't be doing the BKT is because I would STILL have to deal with the THICK/COARSE hair on wash days. Just like I would if I stayed natural and just straightened. That's where I am now. It's not about what it takes to care for my hair anymore; because I realize that chemically treated and non chemically treated hair has to be taken care of. Now, it's dealing with all of this on wash days that I no longer want to deal with. And if I'm going to take care of my hair, I will need to wash/co-wash frequently. Right now I HATE washing my hair, so I don't do it as often. And at this point, I want my hair to be less dense when I do.

So, the decision to use a chemical has been made. Now I just need to decide if I want to go bone straight or not. :perplexed
Click to expand...


Ms. Twana,

The benefit to BKT on relaxed hair is that you can Texlax, texturize or mildly relax THEN let the BKT give you "bone-straight" results. Plus it strengthens your hair and cuts down on styling time tremendously!:yep: My relaxed hair dried very curly like a 3A. By BKT hair tried about 95% straight so I don't have to fight it as much. I can honestly see me doing 2 relaxers a year and 2 BKT's since I only wash once a week. :yep:
 
Veejee said:
Ms. Twana,

The benefit to BKT on relaxed hair is that you can Texlax, texturize or mildly relax THEN let the BKT give you "bone-straight" results. Plus it strengthens your hair and cuts down on styling time tremendously!:yep: My relaxed hair dried very curly like a 3A. By BKT hair tried about 95% straight so I don't have to fight it as much. I can honestly see me doing 2 relaxers a year and 2 BKT's since I only wash once a week. :yep:
Click to expand...

Oh, okay. I was wondering because I saw ladies that say they're relaxed getting the BKT. Then I watched a youtube video and the stylist said that her client needed a touch up, but they did the BKT instead. So I was just confused. :lachen:

Now, that makes sense to use it if you're natural or not relaxed 100%
 
Why did you relax? I missed being able to wear my hair straight. My hair would revert so quickly, no matter what I did or who straightened it.
How did you prepare your hair before you got the relaxer? I don't think I did anything special to prepare my hair, just base my scalp at home. I get my hair texlaxed so I still have a little texture.
How have you maintained the health of ur hair (Regimen)?Wash and D/C about every 5 days. I use Elasta QP H2 leave in and coconut oil. I either rollerset or wear braidouts. I've been stretching my relaxers about 16 weeks at a time.Can u see progress since relaxing? I think that my hair has been growing at the same rate, it's just easier to see the progress.
What relaxer did you use?
Do u think u will go back to being a natural? Probably, I am currently 17 weeks post and thinking about transitioning again. I didn't know about BKT when I decided to relax. I would love to be able to wear straight hair and still be able to keep my natural texture.
 
I was natural from 99 to 04 and the only thing I regret is not relaxing it myself the first time out. I was overprocessed by a stylist and I am still recovering from the damage because of the length of my hair was at that time. It is like I had to transition near mid back length overprocessed hair to APL thick texlaxed healthy hair. I keep it at APL because it is easier for me but I am still recovering. Once it is all healthy and APL I will go on to try and grow it MBL. My natural hair had gotten impossible to comb and wash days took hours upon hours to wash and detangle. I don't regret re/tex laxing at all. I just don't trust stylists PERIOD.
 
I transitioned for almost a year, but decided that relaxing was easier for me. My hair has thrived with relaxers, and because I wear straight styles (with an occasional braid out) most of the time, so it just made more sense to be relaxed.

I say go for whatever works for you. We'll be here to support your decision either way. :yep:
 
AllAboutTheHair said:
...the only thing I regret is not relaxing it myself the first time out. .... My natural hair had gotten impossible to comb and wash days took hours upon hours to wash and detangle. I don't regret re/tex laxing at all. I just don't trust stylists PERIOD.
Click to expand...

Well ladies....I did it!!!! Any ideas on why I quoted the above?????

Let's just say I won't be going back to that stylist......


The texlaxing went fine. She used Elast QP and didn't get me 100% straight. I'd say I'm maybe 75-80%. She rinsed the relaxer out, shampooed, conditioned, then the UNTHINKABLE.........

.....she sat me under the dryer WITHOUT DCing!!!!! :nono: She basically washed all the conditioner out of my hair, detangled (without starting from the bottom may I add), then she sat me under the dryer to dry. So, once I dried, I noticed that my ends were EXTREMELY DRY!! So she takes me to the chair and, without even detangling again....began to blow dry. No detangling...NO leave in conditioner or HEAT PROTECTANT. I am just in AW. I had had enough when she began trying to flat iron and keep going over the section to smooth out the DRYNESS!!!! I just can't believe it. I told her not to worry about it, my hair looked really dry so I was gonna go home and DC it really good. She was like, "yeah, it does look like it needs to be conditioned." YOU THINK!!!!!!

I'm happy with the straightness of my hair. But I'm bout to hop in the shower and use a moisturizing shampoo and do some SERIOUS DCing. I think I'm gonna sleep with it in, and co-wash every day for at least the next couple of days.

UGH.....STYLISTS!!!!! I swear they make me wanna go to cosmetelogy school. :nono: Who knows what she was doing to my hair before I came to LHCF. It's amazing how much I've noticed now that I'm educated on hair care. :grin:
 
Ms_Twana said:
Well ladies....I did it!!!! Any ideas on why I quoted the above?????

Let's just say I won't be going back to that stylist......


The texlaxing went fine. She used Elast QP and didn't get me 100% straight. I'd say I'm maybe 75-80%. She rinsed the relaxer out, shampooed, conditioned, then the UNTHINKABLE.........

.....she sat me under the dryer WITHOUT DCing!!!!! :nono: She basically washed all the conditioner out of my hair, detangled (without starting from the bottom may I add), then she sat me under the dryer to dry. So, once I dried, I noticed that my ends were EXTREMELY DRY!! So she takes me to the chair and, without even detangling again....began to blow dry. No detangling...NO leave in conditioner or HEAT PROTECTANT. I am just in AW. I had had enough when she began trying to flat iron and keep going over the section to smooth out the DRYNESS!!!! I just can't believe it. I told her not to worry about it, my hair looked really dry so I was gonna go home and DC it really good. She was like, "yeah, it does look like it needs to be conditioned." YOU THINK!!!!!!

I'm happy with the straightness of my hair. But I'm bout to hop in the shower and use a moisturizing shampoo and do some SERIOUS DCing. I think I'm gonna sleep with it in, and co-wash every day for at least the next couple of days.

UGH.....STYLISTS!!!!! I swear they make me wanna go to cosmetelogy school. :nono: Who knows what she was doing to my hair before I came to LHCF. It's amazing how much I've noticed now that I'm educated on hair care. :grin:
Click to expand...

:needpics:

Just saying.....
:rolleyes:
 
Okay, sorry ladies, but you're gonna have to wait a while for the pictures. I just got a new computer, and until right this second, I never realized it DOESN'T HAVE AN SD SLOT!!!! What computers don't come with SD slots anymore???:nono:

My other computer, that DOES have one, isn't connecting to the internet right now. I'm not certain what's going on with my home network.

SORRY!!!!! :sad:
 
Ms_Twana said:
See, I wondered about that. So she could put relaxer all over my hair again without damaging it more??
Click to expand...

My transition from texed to bone straight was an accident so I don't feel qualified to speak on the how to's, but do a search on corrective relaxers.
 
Okay, so I washed my hair with Nexxus moisturizing shampoo. Then I used AO GBP under a shower cap and conditioning cap while I showered/shaved. Then I rinsed that out and used Elasta QP DPR-11. I have that on right now. I didn't feel like getting under the dryer (I probably should) so I put on a shower cap, conditioning cap, and two turbie towels. I will keep all of this on overnight. Hopefully the two towels will generate some heat. We'll see how it works in the morning. :perplexed

Oh, and I think my hair may have gotten straighter than I thought.
 
Good luck, Ms Tawana! Can't wait to see pics! I know it's :drool:

Thank goodness you had the God given sense to go home and CARE for your hair without letting that stylist do any more flat ironing. Good for you. Many would not have had the guts.
 
Why did you relax?
was natural for 15yrs and when I found the boards I jumped right in. It was time for a change
How did you prepare your hair before you got the relaxer?
just did it and didn't look back
How have you maintained the health of ur hair (Regimen)?
actually yes I use a lot of protein products to keep my hair healthy
Can u see progress since relaxing? Thats another reason why I relaxed, I wanted to see my length without having to use heat
What relaxer did you use?
precise no lye then just for me kids no lye
Do u think u will go back to being a natural?
I can't see it cause I'm loving the texture of my hair airdried. its very manageable. I'm loving the change
 
Hey OP, I just had a thought. She doesn't sound like she was very caring of your strands. Did she neutralize your hair properly? Put the neutralizer in and leave it for a bit? There are some that do a couple of lathers and then leave the neutralizer in for 10 to 15 minutes before that final wash. The reason is that the neutralizer has to get down into the cuticle to stop the process.

If you haven't styled your hair, yet, you might want to re neutralize today. It may be over kill, but I would be a bit gungho about such things if someone were to relax my hair, now, after 14 years (me).

Good luck to you!
 
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