I'm babysitting right now and one of the kids just told me...

[FrazzledFraggle]

that her dad choked her yesterday.

So we are just getting all ready for bed and without any prompting completely out of the blue...the little girl says daddy choked me yesterday and I say...what did you say honey?

She goes he put his hands on my neck like this...and she puts both hands on her neck. She said she called for her mommy (so her mom was apparently there).

I tried to ask some non-leading questions. I asked her how she felt when he did that. She is very articulate. She said it hurt and she was scared. She said she was going to kick him because he wouldn't let go.

She said her daddy is mean to her and mommy talked to him about it. She is 4 years old. I checked her neck to see if she had any markings. I didn't see anything.

I know I have to discuss this with the mother (who apparently already knows). Beyond that, is there anything else I need to do?

...............................................

 

[Country gal]

Choking her around the neck is a bit extra. He is setting a poor example for his daughter on how a man should treat her.

 

[Natty_Virgo]

Umm how about call cps

Sent from my S3 using LHCF

 

[Shimmie]

Please talk to the mother, ASAP! I would also have CPS investigate this. The mother may also be a victim of abuse.

There is never a reason for a grown man to place his hands around the neck of a child to harm them. Never!

Keep this family in your prayers as well as other families who may be having the same problems (or worse).

I totally agree with Country gal 's response. This is teaching his daughter that it is okay for men to abuse her and it is never okay. Never.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

Not normal. Call CPS.

 

[Lilmama1011]

I would talk to the mom first and foremost to see if the story checks. I would focus on her body language to see if the mom is lying. If I feel she is I would call child protective services

 

[FrazzledFraggle]

Okay, here's an update.

I witnessed some bizarre things in this child's behavior last night after I posted. First of all, she kept accusing her little brother (3) of biting her. The first few times she said it, I wasn't looking directly at them so I told him biting is a no no...I pointed at my teeth and told him no biting..not nice, etc. It was late and they should have been asleep but would not sleep. A few minutes later...I was trying to do homework and she screamed he bit me again but in my peripheral vision, he was nowhere near her....he was a good 5 feet away and had not bitten her. I asked her why she kept saying he's biting when he's not near her and she was adamant that he had just bitten her again. Even though I had just witnessed him NOT biting her with my own eyes...she was terribly convincing. Had I not seen it for myself, I would have believed her.

Now before she came over...I need to insert another weird piece of the puzzle. Before she came over...her older brother was already at my house playing with my son. He's 10. When I told him his siblings were coming over so his parents could go out, he was not happy about it. He said blatantly that the little girl always accuses him of things he didn't do like hitting her. I just thought sibling rivalry type stuff at the time but after seeing her accusing the little boy of biting, and since I've never witnessed this older child hit my son or anyone else they were playing with, I just thought it was a bit strange. Later she also accused the little boy of hitting her when he clearly did not.

Add to this...today I remembered about six months ago the mom told me that the little girl had a conversation with her paternal grandfather whom she had never met. The little girl knew her paternal grandfather's first and last name even though she had never met him and even though her dad never brought him up (they were estranged and he died 10 years ago). She spoke very clearly about who he was and that he would visit her frequently. Today, I reminded mom of what she told me 6 months ago or so and she said "grandpa" still visits this little girl.

I feel as though God let me witness what transpired with her little brother so that I could have discernment over what is going on with this little girl. I do not babysit EVER but just so happened her babysitter cancelled and I know they were really looking forward to going out so I told her they could stay and this was not something I would do under normal circumstances. In fact, we had just returned from out of town and i was utterly exhausted. I just felt oddly compelled to watch them. I feel as though God was showing me something. When I posted that last night, I knew my gut instinct would normally be to confront mom and call CPS but I did not feel called to do that. I felt as though God had me talk to mom first.

Mom says there has never been a situation where she called for her as the result of her dad choking her. I believe her. I believe that if she thought her child was in danger from her husband, she would absolutely put her kids first. I asked the older child if he ever saw his step father hit his little sister (the little girl's natural father), and he said no...not other than a swat on the butt occasionally.

Having said all of that, I do not believe the child is lying. I think this child is dealing with a demonic oppression (not necessarily a possession but an oppression). I think something is really giving her the sensation of biting or choking and when she looks around...she blames it on the person nearest her. If that is not the case, then I think she is dealing with a lying spirit.

I know I just gave you all an earful and I look forward to your thoughts.

Shimmie. Please tell me what you think. I'm not quick to ignore natural causes for behavior but in this instance, I feel as though there is a supernatural force working here.

..........................................................

 

[futureapl]

Call CPS. They should be the ones investigating. I wouldn't even talk to the mom about it.

 

[Blackpearl1993]

I worked as an educator for years before I became a stay at home mom. As a mandated reporter I must tell you that this child's statements warrant an immediate CPS call. I would not talk to her mother or father about it, because if the child is truly abused that may prompt her parent(s) to bully/beat her into changing her story. The guideline for CPS is that you call on the basis of suspicion, and that the agency then investigates. Refrain from asking any more questions, as that can also affect an investigation. Also, the mother may be abused as well. However, if you tip the mother off to the child's accusations and if she is afraid of her husband, the mom may let her husband know. This could be dangerous for the mother and the child/children.

 

[HWAY]

I am a mandated reporter as well. I am a nurse. This child needs help. I agree with Blackpearl1993. The child's safety is the most important issue. How would a 4 year old know how to describe being choked without being a victim or closely observing abuse? This needs to be investigated. The police and child protective service workers are well trained. Dealing with allegations of abuse is very difficult. It is important to know how to approach and speak with the child and family members. Let those who have the specialized training deal with it.

 

[CoilyFields]

Watch and pray.

It's obvious that there is something going on with this child. I would not be quick to call CPS (I'm a licensed Social Worker) given your update. Pray for guidance.

 

[HWAY]

Be very careful whose advice you take. This is an issue of life or death, whether in the natural or spiritual. If you think this is a spiritual issue, speak with your pastor. Through it all, focus on the spiritual, emotional and physical safety of that child as if this were your own.