I think a lot of people get relaxers when they're really young so they don't even know what their real hair looks like?
For me - I had no clue how to take care of my hair. I just wanted it to lie down like all the other girls' hair. Little did I know that relaxers don't really do anything for my hair, there was almost no change whatsoever. I've heard many 3's say the same thing on this board. I wonder why that is?
I had to learn how to deal with my hair on my own and it's been a long journey! LOL!
All I can say is: my hair is farrrrrr from ideal or standard over here, it's only these past ten or so years when I knew how to style my hair that I have started to get compliments. You have no idea how many times people called me "troll" when I was a kid.
I have friends with straight hair that have relaxers because they think it's too coarse. They are from Chile.
I only did have 2 relaxers in my life because I was hoping that it would do something with my hair, but when I realized all it did was destroy it I decided to learn how to work with my natural hair instead.
I found information in Ebony and Essence in the early 90's and around 1998 or so I stumbled on some hair boards...those were the good old days!
I read about people who grew their hair really long and I never thought that was possible with black hair. If anyone would have told me my hair could look like it does today I would have laughed them in the face.
What I want to say with this long post is that it's a journey for all of us. There are 3's and 4's on this board and we all come here to learn and share. I've learned so much from people with all hair types, natural and relaxed.
Hair is just hair and it basically needs the same things, we just have to figure out what it already has naturally and what we need to add from the outside. (Moisture, protein, oil etc.)