I think my stylist may have

D

diamondlady

Active Member
KILLED MY HAIR.
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Everything was cool and my hair was growing and retaining length. I was so happy and I thought "Finally, I'm going to get my hair back, maybe more hair than before". Then December 8, 2003 I got my retouch. It's been H_ll every since that day!!! I found when I got home that the trim she said she was doing was actually 2 - 2.5- inches instead of the 1/4 inch she was suppose to cut. She cut even more in the back because she cut the V out of the back. Then the breakage and the shedding started.

I tried Motions CPR, Nexxus emergencee, and Aphogee. The Aphogee stopped the breakage for about a week and then it started again. I noticed that the last 6 inches of my hair feel rough, even when it's wet. I read some where that when your hair is severely damaged it feels rough because the cuticles are not laying down.

I've been so careful for the last year and a half, now I'm thinking of just giving up. I think I'm gonna lose 6 inches before this breakage stops. All my hard work and money to support by product habit, is gone. I'm past the anger now, I'm depressed and I'm thinking maybe it's not in the cards for me to have anything but short, chewed-up, jacked-up hair.
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Aaaaww diamondlady!! I really feel for you!! I'm sooo sorry this happened to you. It's so frustrating when you've been doing everything you're supposed to and then BAM! You have a setback. I've been there. I know exactly how you feel right now.

What you have to do is launch your own personal campaign to save your hair!! I'm not sure exactly what your hair needs (protein, or moisture) but I'm sure some of the ladies here will help you out with that.

Good luck!! I'm sure your hair will be alright. Don't give up!! Remember it's only hair, and it will grow back.
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You're going to need lots of moisture. Try conditioner washes every day or at least twice a week. Don't forget to deep condition and mix jojoba or coconut oil into your deep conditioner and sit under heat for at least 10 minutes.

Sorry this happened to you
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.
 
I know the trim would pissed me off but what else did she do to your hair for it to shed like that. It can't be the trim. Did you do a touch up and she left the perm on too long? I can only suggest protein conditioners mix with moisturizing ones and vitamins like calcium and biotin. I'm soo sorry.
 
Thanks Lindy,

But this feels like a double set back. I was furious in December with the cut. I started the baggie method and stuck to it religiously since then thinking, as you said, "it's just hair, it'll grow back". I really started feeling better and then the breakage and shedding started.

Now I'm thinking, "no it's not growing back". Something always happens. Forget it. Be happy with what I have and stop obsessing. There are times when I think, with my luck if I grow hair, I'll get cancer, have to have chemo and lose it all anyway.
 
Hello!
My advice would be---try not to manipulate your hair too much. I'd recommend leaving it in a bun for days to a week at a time with the ends moisturized. Don't give up hope. It's only been a month. Just don't do anything on the spur of the moment. Everything looks badly now, but with some more TLC, everything might turn out to be all right.

By the way, you said you used Motions CPR, Nexxus emergencee, and Aphogee---maybe you fed your hair too much protein
ohwell.gif
. Only you know for sure, but try not to stress out too much, and put your hair away for a while, so you don't think about it as much.
 
Diamondlady,
I just re-read your post and I thought of something. Do you think your hair feels rough because of all the protein you've been using lately?? I'm no expert, but to me it sounds like you need MOISTURE right now...
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I would lay off the protein for a few weeks (since you've already used the Nexxus and Aphogee, which are heavy on protein) and use a good moisturizing conditioner with heat and see how your hair responds to that.
 
Moisture will be good and maybe a light reconstructer like Nexxus Keraphix, GBF or DB reconstructer.
 
Sorry to hear about your hair troubles. Severe shedding like that could be the result of the chemicals not being completely neutralized. If you have some neutralizer shampoo at home, it would be a good idea to use it. Then, lots of deep conditioning and as little handling as possible. Maybe reconsider the chemicals altogether. I was reconciled to having breaking, shedding, unhappy hair for the rest of my life, until I stopped relaxing it. Now it's longer and healthier than ever. Just a gentle suggestion. Good luck and big hugs.
 
[ QUOTE ]
diamondlady said:
this feels like a double set back. I was furious in December with the cut. I started the baggie method and stuck to it religiously since then thinking, as you said, "it's just hair, it'll grow back". I really started feeling better and then the breakage and shedding started.


[/ QUOTE ]

I posted before reading your last reply. Diamondlady, it doesn't seem like it now, but you were right the first time---it will grow back. It's growing now. You'll need a touch up in 2-3 months again because it is growing. You'll find another hair dresser who isn't scissor happy, and eventually, you will reach your goal. Evenually, you'll get all this under control. Keep telling yourself that.

Some other questions to consider: have you tried any new products lately? Could the shedding be seasonal, hormonal, or due to medical reasons, OR TO STRESS? When is the last time you removed build up from your hair?

I wish you luck, and keep us informed on how this goes for you.
 
I'm reading these posts and I actually feel like crying. You guys are all so nice.

Starz, I've had this stylist for a year and a half. I only let her braid at first and I watch her do relaxer before I decided to let her do mine. I don't know if she is hating, but she did say looking at how my hair was growing made her want her hair back. I went in one time and she had cut her shoulder length hair to about an inch and colored it blond.

Nutella, I'm not sure what she did. She has been so good up to this point, that I trusted her. I use to watch her like a hawk but I let my guard down.

Lindy, I'm thinking of doing braids again. What do yall think? Crysdon and Brownie, if I get braids I can rinse my hair every day with little manipulation. My hair has alway done well with braids.

Jasmin, I take vitamins everyday and calcium and biotin are among them.

What do you guys think about the braid idea???? And thanks so much for all the advice. I'll probably get over the depression and forge ahead. (Thanks to the ladies at LHCF) I've been here before and will probably be here again.
 
[ QUOTE ]
diamondlady said:
KILLED MY HAIR.
frown.gif
Everything was cool and my hair was growing and retaining length. I was so happy and I thought "Finally, I'm going to get my hair back, maybe more hair than before". Then December 8, 2003 I got my retouch. It's been H_ll every since that day!!! I found when I got home that the trim she said she was doing was actually 2 - 2.5- inches instead of the 1/4 inch she was suppose to cut. She cut even more in the back because she cut the V out of the back. Then the breakage and the shedding started.

I tried Motions CPR, Nexxus emergencee, and Aphogee. The Aphogee stopped the breakage for about a week and then it started again. I noticed that the last 6 inches of my hair feel rough, even when it's wet. I read some where that when your hair is severely damaged it feels rough because the cuticles are not laying down.

I've been so careful for the last year and a half, now I'm thinking of just giving up. I think I'm gonna lose 6 inches before this breakage stops. All my hard work and money to support by product habit, is gone. I'm past the anger now, I'm depressed and I'm thinking maybe it's not in the cards for me to have anything but short, chewed-up, jacked-up hair.
confused.gif


[/ QUOTE ]

DL - listen to me and listen good...

I dyed my hair 5 times in 2 and a half weeks. I thought I had RUINED my hair. The lesson I learned, is that if you catch it, even severly damaged hair can be repaired. I got a few minor trims - but only maybe one extra than I wanted and all were a ahlf inch or less.

I sincerely thought I'd have to do a big chop. I couldn't have been more wrong. I gathered all my best products and and BABIED my hair. When it felt really rough I used moisture. When it broke I used protein. When it was doing both I alternated one for two weeks and then the other for the next two. Nothing worked immediately -and it's still not back to normal - but little by little it gets better and better.

Don't give up. Your hair will respond to consistent care. I'm living proof. now is the time to dig in your heels.

But don't give up.
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Tracy,

I've seen pics of your hair. IT'S ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL!!!! I can't believe you had that much trouble. I love the color and the shine of your hair.

Back in September, when I posted my first pics, someone said my hair reminded them of yours and I was just grinning.
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(I didn't think it did, but it made me feel good that someone else did). I remember thinking how lucky you were to be able to color your hair. (With a relaxer, mine just snaps off if I put a color on, even semi-permanent.)

Thank so much for the encouragement. I'm a little depressed about the hair thing, but I've been that way before and I'll probably snap out of it and keep trying. Especially with your story and looking at your hair now.

I went out last night and brought some LUST for the first time. PJ got to get a fix. I felt a little better.
 
DL,

Do you have any idea what the woman did to your hair to cause the breakage & shedding? Anything peculiar happen at the shampoo bowl or anything? Regardless, she was wrong for trimming 2.5 inches if she said she was only trimming 1/4 inch. No offense, but I think all hairstylists should be required to have a high school degree + a few college math courses if not more. NOW, anyone should know the difference between a fraction of an inch and 2 and a half complete inches.
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I know I don't have to tell you this--but don't go back to her. And didn't you say that you just had a trim in December? There's no way that you needed another one so soon unless your hair was just in pitiful condition (which it's not). It took me some time to stand up to a stylist & say no to a trim. When you feel like it, call her and let her know that you know that she trimmed way more than the two of you discussed. (aren't verbal agreements binding in Texas)? Let her know that you won't be returning to her & that you'll be sure to get the word out about her lack of professionalism.
 
By the way,

Whenever my hair is in need of strength, I always start with a gentle strengthening treatment such as Motions Moisture Silk Protein conditioner or Deep Brilliance Reconstructor--and so far they've always done the trick for me. The proteins that you used (and you used some of the very hard-core, potent ones) may have affected your hair.
 
Diamondlady. I think that braids are a wonderful idea. I have cornrows right now and personally it is one of the best methods for growing your hair. 1) Your hair isn't ot getting groomed or damaged in those harsh elements. 2) You have the option of rinsing and or washing your hair daily without the trouble of styling

If you haven't heard of this sight..... ((which I'm sure that you have)) http://www.growafrohairlong.com
It is an excellent sight that tells you everything on growing your hair in braids without charge!!!
Some of my staple products are the ORS line; Aubrey Organics; Rosemary, Basil, tea tree oil, and jojoba oil; and SURGE!! So try that out.
 
[ QUOTE ]
diamondlady said:
Lindy, I'm thinking of doing braids again. What do yall think? Crysdon and Brownie, if I get braids I can rinse my hair every day with little manipulation. My hair has alway done well with braids.


[/ QUOTE ]

Diamondlady,
I don't think braids are necessary to help your hair to recover, BUT if you've had braids before, and you've had great success with them helping you to grow your hair, then go for it
smile.gif
. If you already know how to care for braids and that would help you to get your mind off of your current situation, then that might be a good solution for you.
 
I'm so sorry this is happening to you.
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You've already got some great advice. I just wanted to say don't give up. You aren't predestined to have jacked up hair! It will be healthy again in no time.
smile.gif
 
[ QUOTE ]
diamondlady said:
Lindy, I'm thinking of doing braids again. What do yall think?

[/ QUOTE ]

Sorry diamondlady, but I don't know much about braids. I've never had them. My daughter has had them a couple of times, but I would never let her get them again.
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I had a heck of a time with her hair when the braids came out!! Then again, I didn't know how to take care of them while they were in, either!!
ohwell.gif
I know that many people get them and have much success with them though, so... if you've had them before and know what to expect, maybe it's worth a try.
 
I've had great success with braids diamondlady and if it has worked for you in the past then give it a go again. When I was 13 I went from 2 inches of hair max to below shoulder length hair in a year. I saw braid it up for long time while you search for a hairdresser who won't destroy your hair.
 
Now, I really do have tears in my eyes. Thanks everyone for your advice and your concern. I know it's just hair but it's also a dream that I haved worked very hard for. One bad move and the dream is that much farther from obtaining.

Supergirl, I don't know what she did. I was in a false sense of security. She had never messed up before. She trimmed before and she trimmed exactly what she said she would. I was at a place where I thought I could relax and she would take care of me.

I was looking around at the women in church today and thinking, "why can't I just be satisfied with my hair as it is, lots of these ladies have shorter hair than mine and they are beautiful and so it their hair. Besides, I've had long hair before some women never have." But I'm not satisfied.

I know you ladies understand.
smile.gif
Thanks so very much. It's important, when you're depressed, to have someone to talk to that understands and wont say you're just obsessing over something that's trival.
 
Diamondlady,

I can definitely understand getting comfortable with someone. You'd never expect them to mess up like that after so man good outcomes. Oh well, fire her!
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Oh DiamondLady!!! I'm soooo sorry this happened!!! Do you think maybe the pj'ism contributed to it?? I know it did for me!! I bought all these different products and went through this period where I got away from doing all my tried and true methods and started trying just everything that was out there and poof - all of a sudden, breaking, shedding like crazy, etc. I just cut another 2 inches off my hair last night because I'm transitioning. I love relaxed hair too, but I must say, the most frustrating thing is when you do everything right - EVERYTHING, and you do one little thing - like maybe switch up on products or in my case - over proteining - and poof - you feel like all your hard work is down the drain! Don't worry - and the answer to your question is NO - you are not meant to have chewed up, short hair! Not at all! Everything will work. You're getting some great advice from all these wonderful ladies here on this board and I know you'll make it through this and your hair will flourish and then you'll be giving someone advice about how you made it through!! :-)
 
CocoaCure,

I don't think it has to do with the products I use. I don't forget the good ones when I try something else. I still use CON shampoo, which I started using 10 years ago. I switch up with other good shampoos that I've found. I still use UBH conditioner by Cathy Howse. When I find something that's good I stick with it. I may add something else but I stick with the tried and true.

I think it is directly connected to something she did. The heavy protiens were used in an effort to stop the breakage. It's been about 2 months. I used the Motions CPR because she told me to use it with the first wash after the retouch. I waited about a 3 weeks then used Nexxus emgencee. I waited almost another 3 weeks the used the Aphogee treatment. So far nothing is working. I also increased the moisture daily.

I saw my hair continuely break from almost 16-inches to 3-inches and I didn't know what to do, so I just watched it break and hoped it would stop. I'm afraid it's happening again.
 
You hang in there honey bunny. It'll all be ok...I'm looking for my color bootcamo thread for you - perhaps (to use C. Howse's phrasing - but not her meothod) a moisture balance system like the one I used when I jacked my hair up may just be in order.
smile.gif


Sometimes you hair just needs a little balance. You don't want to overcompensate for an immediate problem and create another. That much I HAVE learned.

It'll be ok...just breathe deep...

P.S. thank you for saying such sweet things about my hair. When I posted my pics this last time I had JUST began to pull it all back together. TRUST me the look and feel of my hair were NOT the same, and I was losing hair at an exponential rate. I promise you. I just dug in my heels and listened to people who told me to hang in there. You do the same.
 
OH DiamondLady, I'm so sorry!!! She doesn't deserve your hard-earned money anymore!! What you said about the protein rang a bell with me. I OP'd. (Over Proteined!) My hair at one point was growing like mad - just flourishing! Then I had a little breakage as the weather became colder and I did an Aphogee treatment immediately after relaxing. I think I stayed under the dryer too long with it maybe, not sure. But after that my hair was extremely dry and it seemed like no amount of moisturizing was helping. Then, after getting more breakage, I used the Joico K-Pak, and then a week or so later I tried another protein and I think I just plain over-proteined my hair! But it sounds like this lady is doing something similar and either she doesn't know any better, or she's aware and is trying to secure a customer by having one who's hair breaks just enough for them to keep coming back to her! I swear, I just don't even trust hairdressers anymore!!! Can't stand them! Why is it that my hair is always healthiest when I'm the one doing it!!! Perhaps you're your best hairdresser like me!!
 
Girl my hair was so badly damaged, that a relaxer wouldn't even take to my hair. I was all ready to cut my hair to about 3 inches. Unitil my sister stopped me and said work with your hair you can save it. Sure enough a year later, my hair is healthy and growing quite nicely. Don't give up just try different methods and stick with it. My method has been protein treatments and mositure treatments. Each week, alternating the treatments. Sunday protein/ Wednesday or Thursday Moisture treatments. It has helped me greatly.
 
I TOTALLY empathize with you. The same thing happened to me at the salon. My hair was fine until the stylist gave me a retouch. My hair started shedding so severely that I also became depressed and worried. The process that I started has really helped me to regain some strength in my hair. I use Aveda's "Curessence" shampoo and conditioner. Every six weeks, I use Aphogee's "Treatment fo Damaged Hair". It builds hair structure for six weeks. It will also help if you spray in a leave-in conditioner such as Infusium before you style your hair. I have stopped using the blow dryer. Insead, I let my hair dry naturally. I have read a lot of good info regarding vitamins on this site. I have chosen to take Phyto hair and nail vitamins. I have only been taking them for about 2 weeks, so I'm not sure of the results yet. Good luck! JetBlack
 
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