I think i'm finally ready to break up...

[isawstars]

I've been putting this off for so long... i saw the signs weeks ago and friends have been telling me i need to break up with him... but I've been so scared to break up with my best friend... we've been together (long distance) for a lil over 1 1/2 years (my longest relationship). But tonight I realized we're both not happy.

This will be our second break up... I'm too tired to share everything but I wanted to post this to get support because I think I'm going to stall really bad tomorrow. I almost hate that i got back together with him. It was hard enough the first time... and i don't want to get 3 weeks of nasty emails from him again... But at least I now know for SURE that I won't regret this in the future. I know for a fact that it just won't work. *sigh*

My friend tonight reminded me "you had a life before him and you'll have a life after him." I guess we tend to forget that when we're in a relationship... I'm glad she said that... anyways, I'm going to bed and hope that tomorrow goes okay....

 

[Divine Inspiration]

It's like ripping off a band-aid; do it as quickly as you can and then do something to take your mind off of it.

You'll be just fine.

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

Divine - that was a good analogy. Ripping the band aid off quickly. I have to remember that for myself.

Meanwhile, if you saw the signs and your inner intuition tells you that it is not working out, nine times out of ten, you are right. However, I since it is a long distance relationship, I would probably just let it fade to black and not say anything. But don't don't listen to me. Do what your heart tells you to do. Besides, you have nothing to worry about. It's a long distance relationship. And, you can always block him from your e-mails and ignore his calls. It's too close to the holidays and no one wants to deal with that kinda mess anyway. Hope this helps.

 

[isawstars]

I still haven't done it. I keep putting it off. I'm such a wuss! Why can't I just get it over with???

 

[Demi27]

It's hard because
a) you have feelings for this person
b) you're human
c) it's not an easy thing to do

When you're ready to do it, you will.
However, I will say that you should do it soon instead of him breaking up with you (not that he has any intention of doing so). It's weird, but you will feel a little better if you're the one calling the shots. You'll feel more in control.

Stay strong.

 

[NYAmicas]

Well you have my support! All the ladies already gave great advice. Block his addy from your email and you seem to have great friends nearby to help you out when things get rough.

 

[Junebug D]

You can do it! I just dumped off a toxic man last night. It's not an easy thing to do, but you'll be better off for it, rather than dragging it out for x many more days, weeks, months.

 

[isawstars]

Thanks ladies! I finally did it a few days ago. And yeah I do feel better. My heart aches a little bit... but I can easily live with that feeling and I know it'll go away. This being our second break up, I don't know if he was shocked but he was saying that we wanted to try to work things out again. But it is better this way. I'm free!

Would you believe that not even 5 minutes after I broke up with him he took down our facebook status?? He went from "in a relationship with <me>" to "single and looking for dating, relationship, friendship." THEN he texted me "will you mail me the stuff I left at your place." He is known for putting up a front to look alpha and act like he didn't care. He acted even worse than this the first time we broke up. So I shouldn't be surprised but I am... Whateverrrrrr. Luckily we live in different states.

 

[itismehmmkay]

^^^So happy for you I know exactly where you're at. I was there a couple of weeks ago. I hate to be petty, but it might help to remove him completely from facebook. You don't need to be tempted to check up on him.

One thing that's helped me is retail therapy And a good book or two. Try and get one that's upbeat, but doesn't go into the romance arena too much

 

[isawstars]

^^^So happy for you I know exactly where you're at. I was there a couple of weeks ago. I hate to be petty, but it might help to remove him completely from facebook. You don't need to be tempted to check up on him.

One thing that's helped me is retail therapy And a good book or two. Try and get one that's upbeat, but doesn't go into the romance arena too much

Yeah I am staying away from facebook. I don't want to block him on there because I know he'll figure it out and will contact me somehow to tell me how ridiculous i'm being and blah blah. It has crossed my mind though. If he sends me angry facebook messages like he did after our 1st break up. I'll definitely do it.

 

[gabulldawg]

You're lucky you guys live in different states. It should be easier for you to get over him. You don't have to worry about running into him or anything like that. Stay strong, OP. You can get over him.