I Need Advice.

[DarkJoy]

Hey OP. He is being an insensitive jerk. Very immature. From someone who's been around, im gonna say he is acting his age and may not be 100% ready. But yall made a baby so you both need to mature and be on board the same ship.

As for the self esteem: I clearly read your reactions and "voice" here as post partum depression. I had it and it made everything 10 times worse. It also sounds like you have a tendency to depression already with your past so the possible ppd is compounding whats already there.

It does go away eventually. For me it wasnt til she stopped nursing.

Hopefully you will find help to deal with the possibile ppd. Treatment wi get everything else in perspective.

Best of luck and congrats on your baby!

 

[hopeful]

Great advice @DarkJoy.

 

[juliansmom]

Hey OP. He is being an insensitive jerk. Very immature. From someone who's been around, im gonna say he is acting his age and may not be 100% ready. But yall made a baby so you both need to mature and be on board the same ship.

As for the self esteem: I clearly read your reactions and "voice" here as post partum depression. I had it and it made everything 10 times worse. It also sounds like you have a tendency to depression already with your past so the possible ppd is compounding whats already there.

It does go away eventually. For me it wasnt til she stopped nursing.

Hopefully you will find help to deal with the possibile ppd. Treatment wi get everything else in perspective.

Best of luck and congrats on your baby!

Yeah I have been diagnosed with depression and PPD with my first child. I probably have it again..just didnt want to go back to therapy and drugs. Honestly im just now realising how depressed I have been lately..daydreaming about getting away..alot of sad and negative thoughts. So yeah I probably need to get help again at this point.

 

[CoilyFields]

Focus more on yourself. Do things you enjoy. I'm actually surprised folks are acting like he can't have a celebrity crush. People fawn over Idris and whoever all day on here. Married people at that. She said herself he puts her and their child all over his page. To break up or start a fight with someone over that is pretty silly.

Unless he has a history of cheating then I can see you just being over it period. But if this is your only issue then no. You have to address your own issues. You could be experiencing postpartum depression. Get off his ig too. Y'all have a child so you will still have to deal with him and I doubt it's truly over. Maybe he didn't have to post it since he knows it bothers you, but posting a celebrity pic shouldn't bother you.

I agree.

You love him right? To the extent that you had a child with him? But you want to end it because he posted pics of a celebrity? You are right, it does sound crazy. It's not crazy that it bothers you, it's crazy because you have taken a grain of sand and made it into a fortress. You want to break up your family over celeb pics.

You are right to dig deeper to see the real issues. But you will have to learn how to cope and put some things into perspective. I cosign on the postpartum depression thing. Please see your doctor. Continue therapy. I would hate to see you make a permanent decision that not only affects your lives but your baby's life as well, over something this "casual".

And think about this; It may not be that he just disregards your feelings, it could be that he feels like you are trying to control him. Because I can be accommodating to those I love, but only up to a certain point. No one wants to feel manipulated.

 

[CoilyFields]

yall realize yall are advocating that it is reasonable for someone to be upset and initiate real consequences on real life circumstances and relationships

based on photographs of celebrities



NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO



this is why women with more sense avoid the RF

I'm low key shocked. I've always had a sense that people were happy to condemns folks relationships to hell but this is just too much. Over...Pictures?

 

[lux10023]

Um nah she stated this is a major issue for her

It is serious if you explain to your husband how one of his actions is deeply affecting and bothering you that is serious!

It's called regard for your loved ones.

If your loved one is doing something that you've deeply expressed bothers you to your core why would he continue to hurt you in that matter

Op has expressed the deep issues that this brings up for her from her past

It's possible that since it's such a small thing he can keep the peace and oblige her and stop doing it, problem solved.

 

[PeaceLover]

Aww OP we all have body issued. No one is perfect. I hope you find a way to love yourself. I mean, if that's you in your photo you're gorgeous, girl!

Your fiancé is wrong and he should care more about your feelings if you feel this way. I'm not sure what to tell you, but he has got to stop. And don't think your feeling sully because of this...if it bothers you it's not silly!

 

[CoilyFields]

Um nah she stated this is a major issue for her

It is serious if you explain to your husband how one of his actions is deeply affecting and bothering you that is serious!

It's called regard for your loved ones.

If your loved one is doing something that you've deeply expressed bothers you to your core why would he continue to hurt you in that matter

Op has expressed the deep issues that this brings up for her from her past

It's possible that since it's such a small thing he can keep the peace and oblige her and stop doing it, problem solved.

I am not disagreeing that she says it is a major issue for her and that a person should be considerate of the things their loved one has asked of them...even the silly stuff.

I'm saying that she knows that the problem is deeper than the action that he is doing and actually originates with her. So she should address it as such. Deal with the root. Because if she doesn't, He then becomes a slave to her issue right along with her.

From what she is saying I highly doubt that this is the only thing she has requested that he do concerning her particular insecurity. That is why I suggested to her that he may not be responding how she wants him to because he feels like she is going too far and her problem is taking over and ruling her life and his. And it is...if she wants to end her relationship with her fathers child over celebrity pictures.