I give up!

M

MisTatim

New Member
My hair will NOT stop breaking and shedding. If i touch it I get broken pieces or shedding hair. It's still growing at my roots just fine but it breaks off constantly.

I've tried caring for it myself and salons. The results are always the same. If I go to a salon and start making gains, inevitably they overprocess my hair, it breaks off. None of the stuff I've done at home helps either: Not leave-ins, oils, conditioners, garlic shampoo, dominican products, I could go on and on.

I would be willing to go to a salon bi-weekly but I cannot find anyone who knows how to CARE for hair. No hair stylists has been able to give a reason for the breakage. I am not obsessed w/ having hair down to my butt. I'd just like a healthy head of hair. I feel like crying.
 
To get solid advice you should give your current regimen, a quick list of the recent things you've tried and your hair's state (relaxed/texlaxed natural), color (natural, permanent, demi, rinses), and a description of the texture (coily, curly, wavy), as well as type (thick, thin, brittle, etc).

This'll help greatly in getting tailored advice. Otherwise the general -try a DC and a protein treatments may make up the bulk of your responses!


HTH
 
Ahhh, it'll be okay. Okay let's walk through the situation...you may find that doing your hair at home will turn out to be one of the greatest experiences of hair accomplishments. B4 going into a reggie lets get some answers.

Okay the basic ?'s:

How long has your hair been shedding?
Or when did you know it's been shedding excessively?

At home
What's you regular reggie?
What are your extras, besides your reg. reggie?

At the salon
How many stylists do you see? Have you ever ask how long they've been in the biz? How often do you go? At the salon what are you asking them to do? How often are you getting relaxers? Is the relaxer being pulled to your ends after it's been applied to your roots?

How much heat is put on your hair? Are there any color added?
Since products aren't working, How much breakage are you getting? From the breakage, how short is your hair from that point? Have you given yourself an elasticity test? What abou checking for porosity? It's okay if you don't know how I can tell you how.

Can you style your own hair? If so, for a minute, stop going to the salons until you can find the base of the breakage.
I'm not trying to ask to many questions but if you get down to the nitty gritty, you'll be able to find the problem and correct it. I'll walk with you if you need me to.


MisTatim said:
My hair will NOT stop breaking and shedding. If i touch it I get broken pieces or shedding hair. It's still growing at my roots just fine but it breaks off constantly.

I've tried caring for it myself and salons. The results are always the same. If I go to a salon and start making gains, inevitably they overprocess my hair, it breaks off. None of the stuff I've done at home helps either: Not leave-ins, oils, conditioners, garlic shampoo, dominican products, I could go on and on.

I would be willing to go to a salon bi-weekly but I cannot find anyone who knows how to CARE for hair. No hair stylists has been able to give a reason for the breakage. I am not obsessed w/ having hair down to my butt. I'd just like a healthy head of hair. I feel like crying.
Click to expand...
 
Whatever you do, don't give up! My hair was shedding a lot at the beginning of my journey and it turns out I was using too much protein.

I didn't know all of the different types of protein. After finding out all of the names of protein, I checked my shampoo, deep conditioner, leave-in, moisturizer and all of them had protein in it.

Voila, case solved. I eliminated some of the protein and my hair was happy. So don't give up, it just may take the process of elimination to find out what's going on with your hair.

Hang in there :)
 
littlegoldlamb said:
To get solid advice you should give your current regimen, a quick list of the recent things you've tried and your hair's state (relaxed/texlaxed natural), color (natural, permanent, demi, rinses), and a description of the texture (coily, curly, wavy), as well as type (thick, thin, brittle, etc).

This'll help greatly in getting tailored advice. Otherwise the general -try a DC and a protein treatments may make up the bulk of your responses!


HTH
Click to expand...
ITA. We need your full regimen to give u the best advise.
 
In the past i have found the more frustrated i get with my hair the more i manipulate it to try and do what i want. This put me in the never ending circle of damaging my hair no matter what i did.

You really have to stop all of what you are doing and go back to basics. Buy tried, tested and recommended products like KeraCare or Cream of Nature.

For me i wash, condition, rollerset, sit under a hooded drier and wear my hair in different styles with my curly hair. No combing, no flat irons, no blow driers, just moisturise twice a day and 'seek and destroy' trims of those split ends. At the end of the week i start all over. KISS (Keep It Simple Sister).
 
Without any more information, the first thing I thought was that maybe having a relaxer is not for your hair. I am not anti-relaxer--I myself am texlaxed--but I have seen many women on this board state that their hair never thrived until they stopped using chemicals. Some hair just cannot take it.
 
I agree with the others. We need your full regimen so we can know what you are doing to your hair. Don't give up! Cause if you do. You aint ga have no hair:blush: and I know you don't want that! So tell us your reggie:yep:
 
Well please don't give up! You could actually go to the salon section and see if anyone can suggest a good stylist from your area. HTH.
 
Bublin said:
In the past i have found the more frustrated i get with my hair the more i manipulate it to try and do what i want. This put me in the never ending circle of damaging my hair no matter what i did.

You really have to stop all of what you are doing and go back to basics. Buy tried, tested and recommended products like KeraCare or Cream of Nature.

For me i wash, condition, rollerset, sit under a hooded drier and wear my hair in different styles with my curly hair. No combing, no flat irons, no blow driers, just moisturise twice a day and 'seek and destroy' trims of those split ends. At the end of the week i start all over. KISS (Keep It Simple Sister).
Click to expand...

nothing more to add. @ the bolded :yep: my hair loves that stuff (including the new formula)!
 
Dayjoy said:
Without any more information, the first thing I thought was that maybe having a relaxer is not for your hair. I am not anti-relaxer--I myself am texlaxed--but I have seen many women on this board state that their hair never thrived until they stopped using chemicals. Some hair just cannot take it.
Click to expand...

I automatically thought the exact same thing. This head of hair was not made for a relaxer. OP, are you on any type of medication, do you get proper nutrition, exercise, drink enough water?
 
ITA with the other posters -- Don't give up! I was experiencing breakage suddenly after my last texlax. I did a protein treatment and upped my moisture a bit and all seems to have resolved itself. I plan to do a light protein treatment once a week at the most...so the slight change in my reggie did the trick for me.
 
In the past two years I have:

I have tried relaxing at home with ORS. Salon w/ ORS.
The relaxer before I tried Phyto was Mizane or Affirm, I think.
I have tried Cholesteral/Protein conditioners.
Pantene or Motions wrap/setting lotion
ORS deep conditioning packs.
Ojon Pre-wash moisturizers, s hampoo and conditioner (i find the shampoo and conditioner more drying than anything)

My last relaxer was Phyoto(salon applied)
Hot Six Oil on my scalp.
Currently shampooing with Nutrine Garlic Shampoo and Toque Emergencia Deep Intensive Treatment.
Phyto 9 moisturizer
ORS oil moisturizer.

I only brush the nape of my neck. I wrap(no dryer) or hard roll(dryer) it myself when I'm not at a salon. I sleep on a satin pillow or tie my hair up w/ satin scarf.

I only comb brush b4 i go to bed to wrap it or in the morning to get ready for my day. I probably don't use a flat iron or curling iron more than once a month - if that.

And regarding the relaxers: I try to stretch at least 8 weeks. I've tried to go longer and I lose BUNDLES of hair. Typically my hair looks and feels soft to the touch. It doesn't look brittle. I just have 400 different hair lengths from where it breaks off. I received a hair trim with my last relaxer approximately 4-5 weeks ago.
 
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tootrendy19 said:
I automatically thought the exact same thing. This head of hair was not made for a relaxer. OP, are you on any type of medication, do you get proper nutrition, exercise, drink enough water?[/quote]
My questions are similar to Tootrendy19. What kind of diet do you have--are you eating enough protein each day, essential fatty acids (like flaxseed oil), enough green veggies? Are you drinking 1/2 your weight in ounces of water each day? Regular exercise is important, not only for overall health but to get that blood flow to the scalp.
Click to expand...
 
I drink at least 2-16 ounces of water at work a day. And I'm constantly drinking water at home. And take a bottle with me to classes.

I get in 2-5 veggie servings a day, most days. I eat a lot of fatty fish. I've tried vitamins (phytos) two bottles. Flax seen oile. No difference in my hair but my nails looked great. I've tried multivitamins too.

I cannot do a diet as I have an eating disorder.

oh and I did have my hair colored once last year. I'd say my natural hair has a tight, tiny coil. My hair has been like this for years now. I was natural for about 3 years and I still had massive breakage despite regularly moisturizing and the only styling i did was cornrow (no fake hair) or twists. Still broke off. The past 3 years I went to a relaxer (did not look attractive w/t he natural) and after 6-9 months the cycle of breakage started all over again.

I've interviewed dozens of stylists. They either talk like they care about hair and then my hair still ends up effed.

I recently stopped bothering with the ORS Deep conditioner because it made NO dif. Neither has the cholesteral/protein treatments.

In the past 3-4 years, I've gone through four stylists. I leave because either I see no gains or I get a chemical burn or even more breakage. I am trying to see how this current guy works out for at least 6 months.

I wash and condition once a week. I am not big n2 styling my hair. That's why I stick with the basics.
 
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If by eating disorder you mean bulimia and/or anorexia, I would point to that as an obvious cause of excessive breakage and thinning of the hair.
 
neither of those. LOL. I wouldn't have even bothered to cry if I was bulimic or had anorexia.

And I am currently on medication but the breakage occured when I was natural and with a relaxer and that has been at least 6 years.
 
give some pics of your hair...length...breakage...front, back, sides, crown, and nape...need a 360 view and pics of breakage
 
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I think I posted this in another thread, but I have a thyroid condition. Check into that asap. I had similar problems, and have to be very particular with my hair. You might also want to consider transitioning to natural. Weave your hair up, and grow it out. That way, you'll never have to worry about anyone overprocessing it. Infact, your hair may not like relaxers, and if you do have a medical condition...even a small one, relaxers will be even harder on the hair. Just something to consider. I wish you well! Then again, maybe it's not, but you should do a full blood workup and tell your doctors you're losing hair. The others here are wonderful with hair advice, so if that's not working, check into the internal! Their advice is helping me with the moisture issues my hair has because of the thyroid issue. I have always had long hair, but since my thyroid disease, I have had tons of breakage. I had to cut mine to brastrap, which some people strive for, but mine has always been mid back or longer. I tried protein, then moisture, then a balance, and realize that what my hair needs, as it already seems strong, is moisture. So you have to see what makes your hair thrive. I don't even reach for protein now, because of my condition. Only rarely, if I think it needs it. Hopefully that helps.
 
luckiestdestiny said:
I think I posted this in another thread, but I have a thyroid condition. Check into that asap.
Click to expand...

I thought this too, after seeing the regime and hearing that the eating d/o not bulemia or anorexia. Yes, do get checked out. Also, 2-16 oz water per day is not enough. You need 64 oz at a minimum. This alone will give you positive changes to your hair, skin and digestion.
 
Have you checked your porosity levels? I would bet my left shoe, you have low porosity issues and moisture cannot penetrate your strands. Take 1 shed hair, place in a cup and see what happens. Does it sink or does float?
 
Also, 2-16 oz water per day is not enough. You need 64 oz at a minimum
Click to expand...
I don't drink just 2- 16 oz a day. I drink the 2-16 oz at work. I start my day off with a glass of water. And I drink it all afternoon and evening.

Not thyroid. I've had that checked regularly. In fact, physically I'm in great condition except for being overweight. And like I said my nails looked great while i was taking all the supplements.

I will try the porosity test suggested and post pics tonight.

Thanks
 
Why don't you go to that woman that everyone talks about. Tamika? She works out in the city ( I see that you're from North Jersey). She seems to know what shes doing/talking about.

eta: also, you should try going to your doctor to make sure w/e meds your are or might be on (birth control or otherwise) don't have crazy reactions with your daily supplements.

Have you also considered the possibility that hairclips (if you use any) could be the reason for the dryness/breaking. I am currently recovering from a hairclip horror. I still use them, but I'm weaning myself off slowly by learning to use bobby pins instead and using a leave-in twice a week (sometimes i walk around with a showercap over my head for a bit, cause of the dry air in my apartment (from the heater or from outside).
 
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I noticed that you said you oil your scalp but do you put oil on your hair after you use your leave-in moisturizers (focusing on the ends and just before the points of breakage)? Also, I have very fine, thin, fragile hair although it's very soft, my ends tend to dry out at times. I have to apply a creamy moisturizer & protein leave-in everyday & night and I seal with oil every time. My hair seems to change from day to day so I simply mix the protein and water based moisturizer for a balance. Try not using any heat (other than for deep conditioning) for at least 3 months and wear braidouts (your new growth should blend in pretty well). Also, when you're pinning your hair up, make sure that it's loose so that you don't have any tension (try soaking pony tail holders in olive oil before using them and don't put them in tight). Make sure that you deep condition at least 1x per week with heat for 15-20 minutes or longer then rinse with cool water (the heat helps the conditioner to penetrate the hair shaft and the cool water seals it). Try getting rid of the brush and using a large tooth comb (only 1x per week - wash time). No one is going to care more about your hair than you do. I've found that most salons only care about what you look like that day and usually, they are causing damage just to get that look and then you have to deal with the consequences for the rest of the time. Your best bet is to learn what is best for your hair before going to a salon. Try doing your own touch-ups and then you know that there is no over lapping. Does the salon put anything on your previously relaxed hair to protect it when they do your touch-up? Do they wash with the neutralizing shampoo several times and then let the shampoo sit on your hair for at least 5 minutes for the last wash before rinsing it out? Do you use a heavy duty protein treatment the week before your touch up? These are just some of the things that I've learned here and that work for my hair. Not everyone's hair is the same and therefore what works for me may not work for someone else. There is quite a bit of information here on this site. Knowledge is definitely Power!! Try to read all there is to read. You should know more about your hair than any stylist. Don't give up!!! Your hair is growing, you just have to figure out how to hang on to that growth. Try going to a dermatologist (that's what i did). I feel your pain. With my hair, there were clumps of hair all over the bathroom, bath tub, pillow and my clothes. I wouldn't even date because my hair was falling out so much that I thought I'd be bald within a months time. Turns out that I just had to stop letting everyone else try to fix my hair and learn how to listen to it myself. You'll find what works and what doesn't. Take notes, try not to use too many different things at once so you can tell what works & what doesn't. With the help of these ladies, it will all work out. Don't get discouraged and if you do, you can always log on and talk to these ladies, they know their sh*t :yep:
 
I've read through this thread and didn't see anyone mention this. Sorry if it's been said:

How long would you use a product before you gave up on it? Breakage just doesn't stop after one use....does it ladies? I think if you give a product some more time, things may change. And if they don't, move on to the next product and give that a chance. IDK. Re-visit the products you already have on hand.

Im still a newbie but its a suggestion/thought.
 
Ok, pics. I don't want to post all the actual pictures here. So these are links:

Front
Good shot of breakage
Good shot of breakage at crown
Shot of crown from back - this is area is one of my worse breaking points. Noticeably thinner. But my hair grows fine from the roots.
Good shot of breakage pt deux

After I apply the phyto moisturizer and some ORS oil moisturizer, b4 i wrap it up i put a lil oil on my hair to the ends. And end up with handfuls of hair. And get more hair when i unwrap it in the morning. I only use combs w/ fat teeth.

As for the porosity test. I put five hairs in a bowl of water and 4 sank to the bottom one stayed on top.

Oh and i hatesss spending money and wasting so I tend to use all of it before moving on.Except for shampoo and conditioner sets. I got rid of them because I thought the Ojon would be so moisturizing. NOT

I do not use hair barrets. I only comb and brush to put it up at night or b4 i leave the house in the morning. if i'm not going anywhere, it stays wrapped. I cannot NOT comb or brush my hair at all except for once a week.

I've done wthe weekly conditioners/proteins and leave - ins. The stylists do put some kind of protectant on my sides and hair before applying relaxers.

I didn't want to apply my relaxers myself because I feared over processing. But I think I'm going to have to start all over again because I think Firefly is right. Hair salons don't do hair care anymore. They just want to slap a relaxer in and style it. Health of hair be damned.
 
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Yes it's colored. But I can guarantee it's not the coloring that did it. Because I had this breakage when I had no color and when I went natural. I just got it colored toward the end of last year. This breakage has been going on for years now. It's killing me.
 
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