How to pick up men as a single women

[Southern Sweetie]

So this year my resolution is to be bolder and not sit around and wait on a man to find himself to me. This year I'm supposed to be more assertive and seek them out myself.

The problem is I dont know how to do that. I've always been picked up by guys. I'm the type of women who spent most of my life in a relationship dating. Even then, I usually hooked up with someone I already knew.

Now that I'm ready to be on the prowl lol, how can I avoid hitting a brick wall when I try to ask a man for his number. Keep in mind that I'm a bit shy. So shy that I've never even been to a movie, happy hour or dinner by myself.

Help me.... please. My dream is to be more independent when I turn 30.

 

[FluffyRed]

I don't advocate "picking up" men, but I did one time tell this dude, "I'm about to leave, so if you want to ask for my number, you need to do it now."

We started dating, he was a crazy *** possessive weirdo.

It's not the natural order of things, and it puts you in a bad position.

Men are used to fighting and working and sweating, praying, competing to get a woman. So what does that imply about the one you didn't have to fight for?

It sounds logical in theory - why not offer a man your number - they normally do all the work - but if he doesn't ask for your number, there's a reason. Just not that into you, knows he's not about ish, knows he's not worth your time...

Don't do it!

 

[Princess4real]

So this year my resolution is to be bolder and not sit around and wait on a man to find himself to me. This year I'm supposed to be more assertive and seek them out myself.

The problem is I dont know how to do that. I've always been picked up by guys. I'm the type of women who spent most of my life in a relationship dating. Even then, I usually hooked up with someone I already knew.

Now that I'm ready to be on the prowl lol, how can I avoid hitting a brick wall when I try to ask a man for his number. Keep in mind that I'm a bit shy. So shy that I've never even been to a movie, happy hour or dinner by myself.

Help me.... please. My dream is to be more independent when I turn 30.

Don't do that! Please ladies play your role and let these men play their roles. Why on earth would you wanna pick up a dude???

 

[Syrah]

Personally, I don't pick up men because it's a balance of power that's backwards and not the best way to start out a relationship. You pursuit me. But I can and will do things to let you know that I like YOU and enjoy YOU and want to further get to know YOU.

Maintain eye contact. Ask questions about their lives, their work, their hobbies (show interest in getting to know the person). Smile. Mention things that you like to do etc. SMILE SMILE SMILE!!!

You can open the door for future conversations without being the one to "can I get your number?"

 

[Princess4real]

So this year my resolution is to be bolder and not sit around and wait on a man to find himself to me. This year I'm supposed to be more assertive and seek them out myself.

The problem is I dont know how to do that. I've always been picked up by guys. I'm the type of women who spent most of my life in a relationship dating. Even then, I usually hooked up with someone I already knew.

Now that I'm ready to be on the prowl lol, how can I avoid hitting a brick wall when I try to ask a man for his number. Keep in mind that I'm a bit shy. So shy that I've never even been to a movie, happy hour or dinner by myself.

Help me.... please. My dream is to be more independent when I turn 30.

Prostitutes are on the prowl, are you trying to meet a jerk who is going to sense that he doesn't have to do anything to get you?

 

[DarlingNikki]

Men are attracted to the chase. If it is made too easy for them, they will think something is wrong and lose interest.

Men will confuse what you believe to be new-found confidence as neediness REAL quick.

 

[hopeful]

Please, please don't do this. Now I personally think it's okay to let a guy know you're interested and flirt a bit, be really friendly, but that's it, I would never ask a guy for his number or out on a date.

 

[sky_blu]

LOL and somehow I knew this thread would go this way....

 

[MCMLXXII]

Recently, a guy that I was very interested in gave me his number - completely unsolicited. I called, it rolled to voicemail, and I left a cute message. Now, I had no intentions of ever calling him again even though he was my long-time crush. Why? Because when you call someone's cell, you are essentially giving them your phone number and I wanted to see if he would call me. He never called which let me know that he wasn't that into me...and that's ok.

Men need the "chase" and I would much rather be the "chasee."

 

[Theo]

LOL and somehow I knew this thread would go this way....

Lol. Yes... the idea of a woman pursuing a man goes against LHCF dogma. Its just not the culture here.

Haha.... I love this place. Its so unapologetically feminine!