How long is too long to date a man without him putting a ring on it?

Depends on how old you are

my advice for someone 25 wouldn't apply to someone who is 40

but if I had strict advice no matter what age anything over 2yrs is too long and that is generous if you are over 30
 
It differs right? Not just age, but it depends on the guy, your relationship, his career path, your career path, stuff like that!
 
4 years for me, but then again depends on how we doing financially but then again papers cost I think forty dollars
 
I've realized that my thoughts on relationships are different than most on this forum, but I can't imagine being engaged to someone only two years into the relationship. I feel like some honeymoon stages last that long, and you haven't really gotten to know the "real" person yet. "Love" or lust can blind you for a good amount of those two years. I'd want to date someone for at least three years before he proposed. But then again, I'm not the type that would be crushed if I never got married. When I was younger I never thought about what my wedding would be like, and now, at 27, the earliest I'd want to be married is my early thirties.
 
GreenEyedJen said:
I've realized that my thoughts on relationships are different than most on this forum, but I can't imagine being engaged to someone only two years into the relationship. I feel like some honeymoon stages last that long, and you haven't really gotten to know the "real" person yet. "Love" or lust can blind you for a good amount of those two years. I'd want to date someone for at least three years before he proposed. But then again, I'm not the type that would be crushed if I never got married. When I was younger I never thought about what my wedding would be like, and now, at 27, the earliest I'd want to be married is my early thirties.
Click to expand...

I have to agree with you. When I started dating my boyfriend I absolutely KNEW we were gonna be walking down that aisle in like 4 months just because we were life long family friends. Now I'm content with waiting. There are so many legal things that happen with marriage. Because of those things, its best to try to clean up your personal affairs before joining yours with those of another person's.
Also there are things that I can do to my boyfriend now (like leave for 2 weeks for a tour schedule or stay on a co-ed tour bus) that will not fly if I'm a wife. The expectations with relationships change with time and titles. I am learning to be ok with the love we have for each other right now. This life isn't the fun part anyway.
 
In a year both parties should know whether marriage is a potential step. After that, other factors come into play like career goals, age, and so on. Those things have to be evaluated on a case by case basis.
 
At my age (21) I definitely cannot see myself engaged to be married after dating for 2 years. I'd still be in school and establishing myself. It definitely changes for every couple, and their lifestyle.
 
I think I'd also say anything more than a year is too long given their both settled. I was engaged after six months and feel I pretty much knew exactly the kind of man he was.
 
both of you out of school and working, and older than mid 20s...i would say that after 2-3 years you should both know if you're headed to the altar.
 
I think this is one of those questions that externalizes something that's really internal. The people in the relationship know where they want it to go, if it's getting there, and how long it should take to get to that point.
 
I'm in my mid 20's and at my age I can't see myself dating someone for more than two years without a proposal. I'm thinking about children that I want to have and I'm not about that life of having kids at 40...as a teenager or during college dating and indefinitely was fine because I was at a different place in life than I am now.
 
I think it depends on the man, and the relationship. If everyone's on the same page, then it's not necessary to rush to the alter. Sometimes it's nice to just enjoy each other, and date.
 
Question, can we clarify what we mean by dating?

Do we mean dating exclusively or is this including time that was spent dating non-exclusively?

B/c the way I'm starting to think of things, I could date someone non-exclusively longer than exclusively b/c I don't see the point of being exclusive if we aren't heading towards marriage.
 
ladysaraii said:
Question, can we clarify what we mean by dating?

Do we mean dating exclusively or is this including time that was spent dating non-exclusively?

B/c the way I'm starting to think of things, I could date someone non-exclusively longer than exclusively b/c I don't see the point of being exclusive if we aren't heading towards marriage.
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I very much agree with this.
 
Whenever the person feels like it is too long. People are too diverse for over generalized timelines. If you would have asked me 5 years ago, I would have said something like 1 year. Now I know better.
 
I firmly believe that men know within months. If he's not even broaching the subject of marriage within a year, he's not serious.

And I don't want to hear about so and so who married her BF after 8 years. Let me know if the marriage lasted, then we'll talk. :look: :yep:
 
GreenEyedJen said:
I've realized that my thoughts on relationships are different than most on this forum, but I can't imagine being engaged to someone only two years into the relationship. I feel like some honeymoon stages last that long, and you haven't really gotten to know the "real" person yet. "Love" or lust can blind you for a good amount of those two years. I'd want to date someone for at least three years before he proposed. But then again, I'm not the type that would be crushed if I never got married. When I was younger I never thought about what my wedding would be like, and now, at 27, the earliest I'd want to be married is my early thirties.
Click to expand...

:yep::yep::yep:
 
--I'd also like to add that if you are waiting to have sex until marriage whether a virgin or celibate 2 years is just right :look:

--if both parties are marriage minded at the START of the relationship (sometimes people don't get there until a few years into the relationship) a proposal will likely happen within 2/3 years. By marriage minded I mean each person is personally prepared (financially, emotionally, etc.) to marry the right person in the near future (i.e. 2-3 years).
 
I'm in the age of "getting married" and he's about ten years my senior. Ideally I'd like to be engaged by the end of next year. However, I'm not sure if I'm dead set on a deadline anymore. A deadline on such things seems ...un-natural and knowing me, leaving me feeling like I pressured him. When I'm emotional I say "by the end of this year this **** better blah blah blah" and then when I'm calm, enjoying life, planning my goals etc, I'm like whatever...so...yyyyyeah, I'm not much help Womp Womp Womp...
 
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