How long before you let go?

[blaqueskimo]

So I have a question. I know that when you end a relationship with someone the time varies before you let the whole thing go privately................but when do you let go publicly? Let me tell you what happened to me at the club this weekend.


So my man friend and I were out with a whole group. So we had a whole table of friends etc, and everyone was having a good time. Now my man friend had previously dated this lady who happened to be a bartender at this place. We usually don't ever go here but that night we did.( I actually now think he avoids the place because he know she tends bar there etc and that she may be nuts)

Anyway apparently at some point when I went to the bathroom she leaves the bar where she's supposed to be WORKING and comes by him and tells him that he's being disrespectful to her( I can only guess it's because she sees him with me and he's very affectionate with me so she may have seen him kiss me at the table etc.)

So at the end of the night he and another friend of mine went outside to smoke and she goes out there and creates a huge scene. He aint sh**, he's dsrespectful, and a whole lot of other mess.

I walked out to go to the car right after it happened to I missed the whole deal but he claims he didn't do or say anything to provoke it and plus my girlfriend was right there and states that as well.

But I'm like damn.

Why would she be tripping like this? for no reason. So you know I asked the basics. You still doing her or what? Why would she be acting like that for no reason? And to act like this where you work?

The thing is we've seen this chick other places before and he's said nothing to her. She's seen me places before and has said nothing to me.

Could it be she felt like he shouldn't have been seen with another woman at her job? or the more obvious reason?
What yall think?

 

[tinkat]

For me personally regardless of how long I was with a person, if it is over its over....even if I do feel a twinge of jealously. I would not cause a scene, if anything I would hope that the guy would not see me. I say he may be hiding more than he says or she just has not let go.

 

[bermudabeauty]

I need more facts. Who broke up with whom and why? How long ago was this break up? And does he still communicate with her?

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

Although I think it's a bit brash of him to come to her job with you, she should have more composure than to look as salty as she did.

We can talk about how "chill" we would be if we were the bartender, but it's a different story when it actually happens.

 

[blaqueskimo]

I need more facts. Who broke up with whom and why? How long ago was this break up? And does he still communicate with her?

Bermuda,he ended things with her. They dated a few YEARS ago but he did let me know that 7 months ago they hooked up once. But haven't communicated since then. I actually believe him. He told me about it when I was grilling him about why she was tripping like that plus like I stated in my original post he's my man FRIEND. He doesn't need to lie to me about anything he's doing. Him and I aren't on any sexual level so in my mind he can just tell me the truth KWIM.

I'm a straight shooter. I don't pull any punches and don't like drama.I'm not sure how I would have reacted if she had tried acting a fool in front of ME ,but I'm not opposed to if she was dealing with him like that, her simply asking to speak to me and asking what was going on? But on the other hand I'm like that's yall ish,just leave me out of it.

Though like I said he's an affectionate guy and it was apparent we were there together. So if it had been me I'd want to know.

 

[blaqueskimo]

Although I think it's a bit brash of him to come to her job with you, she should have more composure than to look as salty as she did.

We can talk about how "chill" we would be if we were the bartender, but it's a different story when it actually happens.

You know Lauryn I really think that's what it was about because like I said, she's seen US other places before and kept it moving. No incident but we hadn't been this paticular place yet.

Sidenote: I wish he WOULD try to tell me WE can't go a certain place cuz he don't wanna run into an ex.
That wouldn't fly on my end. She's just going to have to get over it.

 

[Makenzie]

][/B]Although I think it's a bit brash of him to come to her job with you, she should have more composure than to look as salty as she did.

We can talk about how "chill" we would be if we were the bartender, but it's a different story when it actually happens.

Why? If it's over it's over. Plus they've seen the girl before when they were together.

You know Lauryn I really think that's what it was about because like I said, she's seen US other places before and kept it moving. No incident but we hadn't been this paticular place yet.

Sidenote: I wish he WOULD try to tell me WE can't go a certain place cuz he don't wanna run into an ex.
That wouldn't fly on my end. She's just going to have to get over it.

I wouldn't stand for that either.

 

[Serenity_Peace]

So I have a question. I know that when you end a relationship with someone the time varies before you let the whole thing go privately................but when do you let go publicly? Let me tell you what happened to me at the club this weekend.


So my man friend and I were out with a whole group. So we had a whole table of friends etc, and everyone was having a good time. Now my man friend had previously dated this lady who happened to be a bartender at this place. We usually don't ever go here but that night we did.( I actually now think he avoids the place because he know she tends bar there etc and that she may be nuts)

Anyway apparently at some point when I went to the bathroom she leaves the bar where she's supposed to be WORKING and comes by him and tells him that he's being disrespectful to her( I can only guess it's because she sees him with me and he's very affectionate with me so she may have seen him kiss me at the table etc.)

So at the end of the night he and another friend of mine went outside to smoke and she goes out there and creates a huge scene. He aint sh**, he's dsrespectful, and a whole lot of other mess.

I walked out to go to the car right after it happened to I missed the whole deal but he claims he didn't do or say anything to provoke it and plus my girlfriend was right there and states that as well.

But I'm like damn.

Why would she be tripping like this? for no reason. So you know I asked the basics. You still doing her or what? Why would she be acting like that for no reason? And to act like this where you work?

The thing is we've seen this chick other places before and he's said nothing to her. She's seen me places before and has said nothing to me.

Could it be she felt like he shouldn't have been seen with another woman at her job? or the more obvious reason?
What yall think?

Here's what I think:

1. It's jealousy because he's with you and not her.
2. He cares for you.
3. She is batshyt crazy!!

 

[JustKiya]

It's over as soon as I break up with you - at least publicly.

Bartender chick was on that **** - even if she was feeling some kind of way, you do NOT pull that kind of mess at work - that's a good way to get reprimanded, going after a paying customer who came with an entire TABLE of people.