Help! Should I get a divorce?!

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Has he cheated on you in the past? Prior to this have you had suspicions he was cheating? Are there any other problems in your relationship?

You haven't provided enough information for anyone to be able to give you constructive advice about pursuing or not pursuing a divorce.

Based on what you wrote above that is a huge leap from that occurence to divorce.
 
ETA: given the back story, marital counseling may be a good route to go. discussing divorce does seem premature though.
 
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It could be a health-related issue. Do not be so quick to think the worst or to run to divorce as an option. Did this occur after working his two jobs? Or has he had this issue prior? You know your husband better than any of us ever will. What does your gut honestly tell you?

Is there a trusted person you can confide in? I don't think the forum is the best place to get final decisions on your marriage. We all come from different environments, with different opinions and some people are not for your best interest. I wish you all the best.
 
What do you mean? He was impotent? If that's what you mean it could be a medical issue especially if he's older than 40 and overweight. Take him to the doctor and get some Cialis.

I don't understand why you're jumping straight to divorce unless you have some other reason to believe he's cheating.
 
Lucie said:
It could be a health-related issue. Do not be so quick to think the worst or to run to divorce as an option. Did this occur after working his two jobs? Or has he had this issue prior? You know your husband better than any of us ever will. What does your gut honestly tell you?

Is there a trusted person you can confide in? I don't think the forum is the best place to get final decisions on your marriage. We all come from different environments, with different opinions and some people are not for your best interest. I wish you all the best.
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:lachen: Please say that again. And why it seems like the response to every question about a relationship is "obviously he doesn't respect you, you need to leave immediately" :lachen:
 
Lucie said:
It could be a health-related issue. Do not be so quick to think the worst or to run to divorce as an option. Did this occur after working his two jobs? Or has he had this issue prior? You know your husband better than any of us ever will. What does your gut honestly tell you?

Is there a trusted person you can confide in? I don't think the forum is the best place to get final decisions on your marriage. We all come from different environments, with different opinions and some people are not for your best interest. I wish you all the best.
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That's my first though as well. It's puzzling she would think otherwise, but as you said, she naturally knows her husband and relationship more than us.
 
I hope that you will search your heart and talk to people that actually know you. Don't go by what we say to make such a big decision.
 
Usually when someone is cheating, there are other signs besides "going soft." Is this the ONLY reason you think he's cheating?
 
"Help! Should I get a divorce?!"

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rejuvenation1 said:
Usually when someone is cheating, there are other signs besides "going soft." Is this the ONLY reason you think he's cheating?
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I know. Maybe you just aren't attractive to him anymore? Just trying to throw other things out there.

ETA: I just saw your post above mine. Maybe it's just awkward now that he told you and he feels weird about it all.
 
mischka said:
:lachen: Please say that again. And why it seems like the response to every question about a relationship is "obviously he doesn't respect you, you need to leave immediately" :lachen:
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I resent that! :lachen: I told somebody to leave, but it was obvious he didn't respect her. :look: They weren't married though, in fact he didn't even acknowledge her as a person. You're right that a forum shouldn't be your final authority on something as drastic as divorce.....
 
rejuvenation1 said:
I resent that! :lachen: I told somebody to leave, but it was obvious he didn't respect her. :look: They weren't married though, in fact he didn't even acknowledge her as a person. You're right that a forum shouldn't be your final authority on something as drastic as divorce.....
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Idk I agree somewhat but I think on the flip side for some reason.... "for some reason" :look:... we are SO SENSITIVE to being disrespected.... :lachen: I have to check myself irl not to flip out on people for "disrespecting" me in the most miniscule ways...
 
I believe you are jumping to hasty conclusion. No you should not get a divorce, you should get "proof". I also don't recommend asking should you get a divorce on the forum because we don't know you, him, nor the situation. Also. please don't go talking to anyone else outside of your marriage unless they are a counselor, pastor etc....
 
That's not even enough of a reason for a divorce. Maybe you jumped to divorce because you are mad about the cheating 5 yrs ago.
 
Does your DH suffer from high blood pressure or diabetes...maybe he or you don't know it.

How about stress. How about simply being tired. There's economic stress, job stress, and the stress to perform.

I dont' think I would consider a divorce based on your current knowledge.
 
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Luvcurlies1984 said:
Well thanks for kicking me while I'm down. I really needed other opinions right now and this isn't something that I want to share with anyone that knows us. I find no harm in posting it to the forum.:ohwell:
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I don't think anyone is trying to "kick you while you are down." I think some folks are just trying to underscore how absurd it would be for them to advise you based on the information you provided. That's a good thing...you don't want a bunch of people egging you on to leave your husband when it may very well be a mistake for you to do so.

I understand why you would be reluctant to open up to people IRL. The issue is very sensitive either way. You seem really upset now, so maybe when your are in a better frame of mind, I suggest have an open and honest talk with your husband.
 
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