Help Me Understand, Please

[dreemssold]

I have always been a little confused about this, but since I am trying to stretch a relaxer, it is becoming of growing concern. I hope I can make this all makes sense, because it's like a stream-of-consciousness thing in my head.

Ok, so, the reason that women (and men) of color have to work harder at maintaining hair growth is not because our hair grows slower, but because of breakage, because of hair has and/or retains less moisture. Feel free to correct me at anytime, please. So, because the hair breaks, it retains less length. This confuses me, because when my hair breaks, it's not THAT much breakage that I should lose the majority of the half inch of growth I should be almost guaranteed. Additionally, much of the breakage is from the root, so why wouldn't my hair be thinner as opposed to being shorter?

I am just somewhat baffled, and it's all making me antsy, because I am stretching this stupid relaxer (not anywhere near as long as most of you stretch, either! This is only day 73, and I usually relax every 8-9 weeks, but the combination of surging and vitamins spiked my growth way up, I think.) and I keep seeing my hair break when I comb, and I'm getting really

. Oh, that's my other question, should I just leave it alone as much as possible until I relax next week or try to comb it at least daily? At this point, I am washing every 4-5 days, and handling why wet. Otherwise, I take my bun down everyday, and put it back up...usually without combing

. Help, please--before I go mad

.

 

[UmSumayyah]

I go twelve weeks, and weeks 8-12 I only was every 7 days, keep it in cornrows and only handle it to comb and cornrow it after I wash it.

 

[dreemssold]

Thanks UmSumayyah--that's good advice. I'm slightly nervous about wearing cornrows on the days I do go into the office, so I've been looking for a style that is work appropriate, but not too many cornrows and something I can do without adding any hair

.

 

[Poohbear]

hey dreemssold, Ive thought some of the same things that you have thought about hair breakage. Im doing the bun challenge to help me retain length and when I redo it everyday, I still have a few hairs on my hands or on my comb if I use one. I dont have breakage problems either but there's gotta be a way to have no breakage at all. I wonder if Im really retaining length or if this breakage is keeping my hair shorter or at the same length.

I just got a relaxer June 13, and Im planning on stretching my relaxer touchup too. The next time I want to relax is in September. When I get a lotta new growth, I plan on wearing my hair in a bun or in two french braids so I dont mess with my hair.

I have been co-washing every other day or every other 2 days. I wonder if that is too much manipulation. To avoid even little breakage, Im just gonna start leaving my hair alone more and just start washing my hair once a week.

 

[dreemssold]

Thanks Poohbear--great idea. Perhaps for right now, once a week washes would be best. Right now, I am wearing a bun, too, but I think that's a little too much manipulation. I'm sick of seeing my strands in my comb. And in my sink. And on my floor.

 

[BlackButterflyz]

[ QUOTE ]
This confuses me, because when my hair breaks, it's not THAT much breakage that I should lose the majority of the half inch of growth I should be almost guaranteed. Additionally, much of the breakage is from the root, so why wouldn't my hair be thinner as opposed to being shorter?


[/ QUOTE ]

Hey dreemssold

I used to think the same thing about hair breakage.. but I think what happens is that although your hair might not be breaking enough for ALL of your hair to be noticable shorter, the spots that are shorter make the rest of your ends look real thin and scraggly (you know what I mean?). And then in the long run you wind up having to trim off those ends that look "see through". Before LHCF, this was the constant state of my hair (mostly b/c I use to LOVE my blow dryer/flat iron) and I would always wind up cutting off the length b/c I hate to see people holding on to thin ends just for the sake of showing the length

. Back in Oct. I had to start all over again and cut my hair to about ear length to get all my thick ends back. And like you, my hair has never gotten thinner, just shorter from breakage. I hope this answers your question... At least this is the way breakage was causing shorter hair for me.

 

[Poohbear]

[ QUOTE ]
BlackButterflyz said:
Hey dreemssold

I used to think the same thing about hair breakage.. but I think what happens is that although your hair might not be breaking enough for ALL of your hair to be noticable shorter, the spots that are shorter make the rest of your ends look real thin and scraggly (you know what I mean?). And then in the long run you wind up having to trim off those ends that look "see through". Before LHCF, this was the constant state of my hair (mostly b/c I use to LOVE my blow dryer/flat iron) and I would always wind up cutting off the length b/c I hate to see people holding on to thin ends just for the sake of showing the length

. Back in Oct. I had to start all over again and cut my hair to about ear length to get all my thick ends back. And like you, my hair has never gotten thinner, just shorter from breakage. I hope this answers your question... At least this is the way breakage was causing shorter hair for me.

[/ QUOTE ]

I have discontinued using heat on my hair so Im wondering if my hair breakage is due to recovering from using heat...maybe it will eventually stop breaking once I havent used heat for a longer time.

 

[26INCHHAIR]

I basically stopped counting my stretch out weeks by now, but the last time i got a relaxer was the saturday before easter, and when my hair gets as tangles as it is now, i need extra moisture because of the different textures, so i co wash it and shampoo once a week to clarify, i keep my hair in protective styles and the only time i finger comb it is in the shower, and thats it. I do this b/c at this stage my hair is extra prone to breakage so i leave it alone and its been working for me, and i mean if i have to go somewhere a good roller set works, or a good bantu knot set works and all is good! Oh and i dont use heat not even for the roller sets, i just sleep in the curls

 

[dreemssold]

Oooohhh, BlackButterflyz!

NOW, I get it, lol. Thank you--it finally makes sense

!

 

[dreemssold]

Good point, 26inchhair--I really NEED to stop counting the weeks so much, also. You ladies have convinced me...once a week shampooing it is

. Thanks!

 

[BlackButterflyz]

You're welcome

 

[Isis]

From the root is shedding, not breakage. Breaking hair are smaller pieces from the ends. Since you are wearing protective styles, and no heat (right?), then there is no need to comb your hair. Combing after airdrying especially can cause breakage.

I stretched my relaxer to 14 weeks!! not on purpose, I planned on 13 weeks and got really busy in my life. During the last few weeks I've kept my hair up in my braided style with almost no manipulation.

I've had almost no breakage since I stopped using heat and normal shedding. It's so wonderful not to have to think about that anymore. If you are using heat you may want to think about minimal or no heat Dreemssold.

 

[dreemssold]

@14 weeks...good job, Isis! You are preaching to the choir about minimal heat, though. I have not used direct heat on my hair regularly for the past 13 years, with the exception of the times my hair has been shorter than a few inches. I have never owned any heating appliances other than a heat cap, and I only indulge in direct heat VERY occasionally (3-4 times per year). It would be IMPOSSIBLE for heat to be the cause of my problem

. Thanks for making the distinction, though, because you are absolutely right--what I have is shedding, not breakage. Is there no way to prevent this over the next week until I get relaxed outside of braids? And you think it's okay that I'm not combing it, right? It just gets me nervous because the longer I go without combing, the more tangled it seems to be when I do comb it...and I am only combing it dry to put it back in a bun, so that the bun doesn't look TOO raggedy--should I just stop doing that until next week?

 

[Isis]

Wow - no heat on your hair regularly for the past 13 years!! That's great Dreemssold!

Somehow I've learned to comb and smooth my hair with my fingers and hands after it has been airdried, whether it was into a bun or French Twist or even picking apart my braidout slightly. It was like an instinctual thing - suddenly I could comb my hair without a comb without it looking raggedy!

If I make sure all the tangles are out when detangling under a shower and after putting in my leave-in and oils, and airdrying it in a smooth way, it won't tangle again.
I feel that as little manipulation as possible on your hair at this stage is best, which includes no combing. Some of the ladies here use one of those soft brushes for smoothing but that is all. If your hair is in a style where smoothness isn't important, then it doesn't matter. You may want to practice using your fingers and hands instead of a comb on your dry hair to see how it feels and works.

 

[dreemssold]

LOL...I don't think I have that instinct

, but I am going to try and hope for the best! I am going to put my comb under the sink, so I don't even consider it. Thanks again, Isis

.

 

[Isis]

You're welcome Dreemssold.