My answers...
1. I said this in another thread, but I am always puzzled when women post/discuss a litany of issues about a dude and then say, "Am I overreacting/being too sensitive?" Uh, wha??? If what women are posting is 100% true, then I'd say they're underreacting and not being sensitive enough? Why do women question themselves about their gut instincts and the BIG HONKING RED FLAGS telling us that something ain't right?
You're right. I think it's natural that women question themselves because society tends to blame WOMEN when relationships fail. I'm always amazed at all of the magazine articles on what you're doing wrong; why you're alone, etc. With all the negativity directed at women, it's no wonder why we tend to look at ourselves first rather than the other person. I know that he has issues, but I always make sure that I check myself. For the record, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with me. It's HIM!! 
2. I've been with plenty of men who share their feelings. Men don't share their feelings with other men, and that's why they like being with women... they can reveal their more vulnerable side with a woman. Shoot, sometimes dudes reveal too much to me too early and I'm like, "Get a grip!"
If a man can't reveal his feelings to a woman whom he supposedly cares about, then he's got some unaddressed issues with himself.
Yeah, I have, too. What's really puzzling is that earlier on in the relationship, he was telling me personal things about himself: (1) that he got into a bad business deal but that he won a law settlement; (2) during our conversation about the economic downturn, he tells me that he's "upside down" on his own house; and (3) expressed the desire for me to move in with him. That's when he told me that he's never lived with his SO. (Of course, I new better but maybe he wanted me to move in so that someone could help me with is 'upside down' mortgage.) But, you're right: if he tells me that he cares for me but cannot open up, it says more about him than me. I do feel that I have retained my power in this situation.
3. Gay? He could be. Who knows.
I just find his behavior rather odd. Maybe he's not gay. I know enough gays/lesbians, and there are no real differences between them and straight people. I just find his behavior a bit odd for a man who likes women. He cannot tell a woman how he feels, let alone, express himself emotionally or physically. It's weird.
4. He could lack empathy. It's hard to say. But something is wrong with him, we know that.
Something's wrong with him. Definitely. It's a moot point. But he does continue to call me. As Earth, Wind and Fire sang, "after the love is gone..."
5. See No. 4.
I do know men like this guy, and they are deeply troubled. I understand the need to figure out what makes him tick (I've been like that before), but I finally recognized that it's not my battle to fight. There are folks who get paid to do these things, and since no one is paying me to figure out their issues, I just need to leave well enough alone and not even try to worry about it. I've got enough of my own stuff to deal with, let alone someone else's.
Sure. I have enough problems on my own to deal with. I have surprised myself, though. I don't think about him much. I'm handling the break-up surprisingly well. It is he who is pursuing me. And the more than I don't return his calls or texts, the more he pursues me. Again, it's weird. This must be more about his ego.
I know I might be coming off as lacking feeling, but seriously, I just don't care about those types anymore. If they have problems, I wish them well and hope they solve them, but I have to pass on them because I can't be bothered wondering why they are the way they are.
Not at all. You've been great!! And you've been right at every stop. He has the problems and I don't have time--and am too old--to be dealing with them. It's too much energy. I'd much rather move on. I'm serious about that.
