He called me a lier!

W

WomanlyCharm

New Member
Maybe one of y'all can explain what the hell just happened...'cause I'm at a loss. :nono:

I just hired a personal trainer a couple of weeks ago, and I've been so excited, telling my SO all about the exercises he makes me do, how I'm getting my body right, etc.

My trainer is also a friend of mine who works in the same company as I do, but we work completely different hours. For him, the training is a side hustle. I never mentioned this to my SO because it just never came up.

My SO called and asked how my workout went today...and I was telling him all about it. I talked about how the trainer also works at my company, and my SO started yelling that I'd been lying to him!

I'm like WHAAAAT? :nuts:

He claims I lied by omission, that I should have told him first that the trainer was someone who worked in the same company, and I was deliberately trying to mislead him.
He likened it to him going to work out with a hot coworker...I told him I'd be all for that, 'cause he'd been complaining about his body for a while, and maybe it would help! (yes, I know that was mean. :nono:)

Finally he yelled at me to have a good afternoon with my lying self, and I told him I sure will...and hung up on him. And I do not plan on calling back. Ever.

Am I crazy??? Am I missing something??? Is he having some kind of jealous emptional breakdown??? Because I really don't understand what the hell happened! :perplexed
 
Sounds like he's jealous that you're hanging out with a fine trainer during working hours and after work. He'll calm down soon.
 
WomanlyCharm said:
Maybe one of y'all can explain what the hell just happened...'cause I'm at a loss. :nono:

I just hired a personal trainer a couple of weeks ago, and I've been so excited, telling my SO all about the exercises he makes me do, how I'm getting my body right, etc.

My trainer is also a friend of mine who works in the same company as I do, but we work completely different hours. For him, the training is a side hustle. I never mentioned this to my SO because it just never came up.

My SO called and asked how my workout went today...and I was telling him all about it. I talked about how the trainer also works at my company, and my SO started yelling that I'd been lying to him!

I'm like WHAAAAT? :nuts:

He claims I lied by omission, that I should have told him first that the trainer was someone who worked in the same company, and I was deliberately trying to mislead him.
He likened it to him going to work out with a hot coworker...I told him I'd be all for that, 'cause he'd been complaining about his body for a while, and maybe it would help! (yes, I know that was mean. :nono:)

Finally he yelled at me to have a good afternoon with my lying self, and I told him I sure will...and hung up on him. And I do not plan on calling back. Ever.

Am I crazy??? Am I missing something??? Is he having some kind of jealous emptional breakdown??? Because I really don't understand what the hell happened! :perplexed
Click to expand...


He's just jealous and will get over this soon....just let it blow over. If you've done nothing wrong, there's nothing to worry about. He knows in his heart if you are a trust worthy woman. Trust...this is small...he'll get over it
 
I agree that he'll get over it. If he doesn't, he was looking for an excuse. This is small. I'm sure the two of you can talk this out.
 
Yes, I understand him.

This "trainer" is someone who obviously got to know you on some other level and your communication lead to the dude being your trainer. Your sexy male trainer was your friend and coworker first....think about it. To your SO, it probably seems so much more personal...more room for feelings to develop.

As opposed to

If you had sought a trainer say through a gym, you wouldnt know him on a personal level, it would more likely be just business.

Then leaving it out all together makes it seems like you had something to hide initially and for what ever reason decided to tell him.

Just my 2...
 
wow--im sorry but calling your SO a liar is kinda harsh esp when you 2 are suppose to be doing the rlp trust thing..

i don't knwo i woulda been pissed the hell off i'll be damned if my boo is gonna call me a liar for no damn reason over some nonsense--he should be HAPPY THAT YOUR TRYIGN TO GET IN SHAPE AND HANDLE YOUR PHYSICAL SITATUION..HE WOULD GET THE ULTIMATE WTF R U SERIOUS--

HE'S BUGGIN OUT
I HOPE U GUYS WORK IT OUT BUT HE WOULD BE ON MY ISH LIST FOR A FEW...WHO NEEDS A MATE THAT IS CALLING YOU A LIAR AND ETC ETC OVER SOME NONSENSE--COME ON NOW...:nono::nono::nono:

WITH ALL THE STRESS YOUR ALREADY GOING THROUGH WITH THOSE EFFED UP CO-WORKERS AND ETC HE SHOULD BE THE LAST DAMN PERSON ADDING TO THE STRESS LEVEL...--HE NEED A TIME OUT
 
HoneyLemonDrop said:
Yes, I understand him.

This "trainer" is someone who obviously got to know you on some other level and your communication lead to the dude being your trainer. Your sexy male trainer was your friend and coworker first....think about it. To your SO, it probably seems so much more personal...more room for feelings to develop.

As opposed to

If you had sought a trainer say through a gym, you wouldnt know him on a personal level, it would more likely be just business.

Then leaving it out all together makes it seems like you had something to hide initially and for what ever reason decided to tell him.

Just my 2...
Click to expand...

I agree with HLD :yep:
 
I don't agree. I think that it was a lie by omission and he was probably feeling insecure because that is something that you should have probably mentioned to him. He was probably under the impression that this was a trainer that you had no other dealings with.

Then on top of that you got defensive on him...said some rude things and it escalated.

I think all he needs to hear is, "Honey I didn't think it was a big deal that my trainer works in my building. It didn't occur to me that it would bother you. I don't appreciate being called a liar when that was not my intention. You know you're the only man for me. I'm trying to get in shape for myself and for us together. Nobody else matters. I love you and I hope we can work through this."

He should then apologize for acting jealous and stank.
 
HoneyLemonDrop said:
Yes, I understand him.

This "trainer" is someone who obviously got to know you on some other level and your communication lead to the dude being your trainer. Your sexy male trainer was your friend and coworker first....think about it. To your SO, it probably seems so much more personal...more room for feelings to develop.

As opposed to

If you had sought a trainer say through a gym, you wouldnt know him on a personal level, it would more likely be just business.

Then leaving it out all together makes it seems like you had something to hide initially and for what ever reason decided to tell him.

Just my 2...
Click to expand...


ITA with this whole post :up: ...Look at this situation from his view
 
Thank you ladies for all of your insight. I really appreciate it. I was so blindsided when this happened, trying to see his side was the last thing on my mind.

The only problem I have with him possibly being jealous over this is...MY TRAINER IS GAY. AND HE KNOWS THIS.

When he was ranting I asked him, "are you really gettting jealous over a gay man?!" :rolleyes:

We still haven't talked yet...:ohwell:
 
Maybe he has other things on his mind i think you should talk to him and see what's going on deeper with him.




WomanlyCharm said:
Thank you ladies for all of your insight. I really appreciate it. I was so blindsided when this happened, trying to see his side was the last thing on my mind.

The only problem I have with him possibly being jealous over this is...MY TRAINER IS GAY. AND HE KNOWS THIS.

When he was ranting I asked him, "are you really gettting jealous over a gay man?!" :rolleyes:

We still haven't talked yet...:ohwell:
Click to expand...
 
WomanlyCharm said:
Maybe one of y'all can explain what the hell just happened...'cause I'm at a loss. :nono:

I just hired a personal trainer a couple of weeks ago, and I've been so excited, telling my SO all about the exercises he makes me do, how I'm getting my body right, etc.

My trainer is also a friend of mine who works in the same company as I do, but we work completely different hours. For him, the training is a side hustle. I never mentioned this to my SO because it just never came up.

My SO called and asked how my workout went today...and I was telling him all about it. I talked about how the trainer also works at my company, and my SO started yelling that I'd been lying to him!

I'm like WHAAAAT? :nuts:

He claims I lied by omission, that I should have told him first that the trainer was someone who worked in the same company, and I was deliberately trying to mislead him.
He likened it to him going to work out with a hot coworker...I told him I'd be all for that, 'cause he'd been complaining about his body for a while, and maybe it would help! (yes, I know that was mean. :nono:)

Finally he yelled at me to have a good afternoon with my lying self, and I told him I sure will...and hung up on him. And I do not plan on calling back. Ever.

Am I crazy??? Am I missing something??? Is he having some kind of jealous emptional breakdown??? Because I really don't understand what the hell happened! :perplexed
Click to expand...
Are you sure this isnt my ex???? IS he smoking crack.... I am running in the opposite direction from mine because i think he has some serious emotional issues. He has trust problems to freak out over somehting that has no bearing on anything.... How was that lying??? I am about to get fired up over here because that makes no sense
 
WomanlyCharm said:
Thank you ladies for all of your insight. I really appreciate it. I was so blindsided when this happened, trying to see his side was the last thing on my mind.

The only problem I have with him possibly being jealous over this is...MY TRAINER IS GAY. AND HE KNOWS THIS.

When he was ranting I asked him, "are you really gettting jealous over a gay man?!" :rolleyes:

We still haven't talked yet...:ohwell:
Click to expand...

:ohsnap: Your man don't want you around any other penises even if the other penis loves other penises. :lol:
 
WomanlyCharm said:
Maybe one of y'all can explain what the hell just happened...'cause I'm at a loss. :nono:

I just hired a personal trainer a couple of weeks ago, and I've been so excited, telling my SO all about the exercises he makes me do, how I'm getting my body right, etc.

My trainer is also a friend of mine who works in the same company as I do, but we work completely different hours. For him, the training is a side hustle. I never mentioned this to my SO because it just never came up.

My SO called and asked how my workout went today...and I was telling him all about it. I talked about how the trainer also works at my company, and my SO started yelling that I'd been lying to him!

I'm like WHAAAAT? :nuts:

He claims I lied by omission, that I should have told him first that the trainer was someone who worked in the same company, and I was deliberately trying to mislead him.
He likened it to him going to work out with a hot coworker...I told him I'd be all for that, 'cause he'd been complaining about his body for a while, and maybe it would help! (yes, I know that was mean. :nono:)

Finally he yelled at me to have a good afternoon with my lying self, and I told him I sure will...and hung up on him. And I do not plan on calling back. Ever.

Am I crazy??? Am I missing something??? Is he having some kind of jealous emptional breakdown??? Because I really don't understand what the hell happened! :perplexed
Click to expand...


IS this what couples fight about???? YOu mean people get mad over lil ish like this??? If your man knew you and trusted you, then all of that wouldn't have been necessary. He is insecure and HE needs to work that ish out. I wouldn't be apologizing or explaining nothing because it was just that....NOTHING!! Sounds like some ole female drama. Just something to pick a fight about. And the way he handled it by coming out the box yelling!? Please! NEXT!
 
How much time do you spend with your SO? Perhaps he is jealous that this guy gets to spend a lot of time with you - whether he is gay or not.

Also, maybe deep down he thinks that you could develop feelings for this guy because of proximity and time spent. It is not uncommon for women to fall in love with gay men. Even when they know the guy is gay. In that case if you fell in love even though nothing developed your SO would still be hurt.

Do you think you may have suppressed the idea that he was a co-worker, perhaps because you knew SO would get mad? Sometimes when we omit details it is because we know something bad will happen if we tell.
 
EMJazzy said:
:ohsnap: Your man don't want you around any other penises even if the other penis loves other penises. :lol:
Click to expand...


I read this about 10 minutes ago, and I'm STILL laughing! :lachen: :lachen:
That is the line of the year!

He called late last night and apologized for being a jealous fool and blowing things out of proportion...he begged my forgiveness, and sent flowers this morning.
I've never given him a reason to get jealous, although we are doing the LD thing right now. He knows he's the one for me.
I told him if we're gonna fight, it better be about something BIG! :spinning:

Thanks again ladies!
 
lana said:
I don't agree. I think that it was a lie by omission and he was probably feeling insecure because that is something that you should have probably mentioned to him. He was probably under the impression that this was a trainer that you had no other dealings with.

Then on top of that you got defensive on him...said some rude things and it escalated.

I think all he needs to hear is, "Honey I didn't think it was a big deal that my trainer works in my building. It didn't occur to me that it would bother you. I don't appreciate being called a liar when that was not my intention. You know you're the only man for me. I'm trying to get in shape for myself and for us together. Nobody else matters. I love you and I hope we can work through this."

He should then apologize for acting jealous and stank.
Click to expand...

I disagree. Why does it matter that your trainer works for the same company that you do? If he's insecure, that's his problem. Tell him to be a man about it! LOL
 
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