He Asked Her To Pee On Him.

[Evolving78]

Unless you are a part of these marriages and in their bedrooms, you have no idea whether their sex is "detached" or not. I'm not a fan of toys personally but not because gadgets somehow change the level of intimacy...that idea is just absurd. Emotional intimacy and connection with your partner doesn't spontaneously disappear because of a toy.

Emotional Intimacy and gadgets? Ok you win.

 

[Ms. Tarabotti]

Same theory applies. It’s emotionally detached sex. Folks gotta create scenes, bring in a bunch of props and gadgets, etc..
it’s like cooking with the most basic ingredients, basic tools and the meal comes out incredible because of the love and energy that was put in to it. But the meal where all of the latest and greatest gadgets, tools, and equipment used just doesn’t have the same love and warmth to it. It may taste good, but that’s it.

Why do you think that using a toy during sex means that the sex is 'emotionally detached'? If it doesn't do it for you, fine. I don't think that you can put that label on other peoples sex lives without knowing their intimate history. I'm willing to bet that there are plenty of people having emotionally fulfilling sex lives while using props and gadgets. There are probably people having regular sex that is 'emotionally detached'. What I like may not be what you like and that's fine- it doesn't mean that I have a psychological issue or that my relationship is stunted. It just means that I like to do things differently from you.

 

[ckisland]

Why do you think that using a toy during sex means that the sex is 'emotionally detached'? If it doesn't do it for you, fine. I don't think that you can put that label on other peoples sex lives without knowing their intimate history. I'm willing to bet that there are plenty of people having emotionally fulfilling sex lives while using props and gadgets. There are probably people having regular sex that is 'emotionally detached'. What I like may not be what you like and that's fine- it doesn't mean that I have a psychological issue or that my relationship is stunted. It just means that I like to do things differently from you.

Thank you!

There is a level (or kind) of intimacy that can arguably only be achieved with a certain amount of putting your safety and well-being literally in someone else's hands. I have seen some of the extreme extreme things people allow other people to do to them. There is a level of complete and utter trust, and almost religious devotion that's different from what I see in more traditional couples. It's not my thing, but I don't doubt the intimacy in those relationships.

 

[Evolving78]

Why do you think that using a toy during sex means that the sex is 'emotionally detached'? If it doesn't do it for you, fine. I don't think that you can put that label on other peoples sex lives without knowing their intimate history. I'm willing to bet that there are plenty of people having emotionally fulfilling sex lives while using props and gadgets. There are probably people having regular sex that is 'emotionally detached'. What I like may not be what you like and that's fine- it doesn't mean that I have a psychological issue or that my relationship is stunted. It just means that I like to do things differently from you.

You keep saying what I may or may not be into or what I like. So I take that as you liking those things and are offended by my comments (projection). I stand by my statements.

 

[Artemis24]

Thank you!

There is a level (or kind) of intimacy that can arguably only be achieved with a certain amount of putting your safety and well-being literally in someone else's hands. I have seen some of the extreme extreme things people allow other people to do to them. There is a level of complete and utter trust, and almost religious devotion that's different from what I see in more traditional couples. It's not my thing, but I don't doubt the intimacy in those relationships.

You are correct. I'm on some bdsm forums and there's nothing "emotionally detached" about most of the relationships and experiences I read about. Personally, I find submission (esp non-sexual submission) very emotionally fulfilling. Idk why but it makes me really happy. I wouldn't know what to do what a traditional relationship.